having panic attack

[honeybee]

oh god, im so sorry but im sat here shakinf and crying and having panic attack.. cant handle it. fell out with my fella today so decided to spend the night at my mums, she's gone out and i'm babysitting. my oldest sister just gone to bed and now im all alone. my mum has just got back together with a d*ckhead after they split up cos he got violent.. why is she with him??? she's spending the night with him and i'm sat here scared for her saftey.. im so scared... why wont she learn from her mistakes? why is she with someone like that?

i've just spoken to my fella on the phone and i just feel like crap, he said some horribl;e things today and im not sure how i feel. i cant express my feeling anymore.... i keep everything locked up so so so tight, i don't know how to let it out.. im all alone and i have no one right now, im alone and im scared.

[LickeyEndBlues]

Honeybee you are not alone in here.


{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Honeybee}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}


I can't relate to what you are experiencing but others will.

Iain

[hoppipolla]

oh wow this is recent, often when i read these kind of threads/posts they are really old so i can't help even if i want to!

take it easy though, there are lots of us here to help that's why this forum is so great :)

the thing with your bf... give things time to settle and blow over, that's what i do and it usually works :) or write a text or something that's like super honest and just puts you both on the same level, maybe it will help him see it from your perspective... i don't know which option is better it depends what's going on lol

as for your mum... that sucks :( there is not much you can do for now but maybe you could talk to her sometime, or just be there for her and close by. there are a lot of not so nice and weird guys out there, just need to find ways to deal with them lol

[groovygranny]

Oh, Honeybee!:huh:

So sorry to hear things didn't get any better for you last night.:ohmy:

I sincerely hope your bf is a bit more willing to start listening to you today. Please try not to bottle things up cos sooner or later you'll pop. Sometimes the worry of how we're going to say things stops us saying them at all, but my motto is 'it's better out than in'.

Keeping it all inside is like trying to prevent a volvano from erupting, but sooner or later the pressure will be intolerable and something will have to give. When this happens we've got make sure it's under at least a little of our control. Perhaps releasing things one thing at a time may be the route for you? Then you won't feel as though you've got to try and work out how to say it all at once?

I wish I could help you but here's a big hug for now

((((((((((((((((((((((:hugs:))))))))))))))))))

[honeybee]

Oh, Honeybee!:huh:

So sorry to hear things didn't get any better for you last night.:ohmy:

I sincerely hope your bf is a bit more willing to start listening to you today. Please try not to bottle things up cos sooner or later you'll pop. Sometimes the worry of how we're going to say things stops us saying them at all, but my motto is 'it's better out than in'.

Keeping it all inside is like trying to prevent a volvano from erupting, but sooner or later the pressure will be intolerable and something will have to give. When this happens we've got make sure it's under at least a little of our control. Perhaps releasing things one thing at a time may be the route for you? Then you won't feel as though you've got to try and work out how to say it all at once?

I wish I could help you but here's a big hug for now

((((((((((((((((((((((:hugs:))))))))))))))))))

thanks to everyone for your comments... todays another day i suppose, another panic attack later and another day to get on with... i'm sure things with my fella will get better, as for my mum, well i think it too late to fix what's broken there, if my panic attacks are a result of the things im bottling up because of that situation then to be honest i'd rather have the panic attacks than try and talk about it, she doesn't want to listen. i've tried talking to other people about it but what help is that gonna do??? there's just no point anymore... i'm really sorry to winge winge winge, i dont like the way this is making me come across to you lot but i just need to let it out somewhere, whether you read it or not, reply or not i dont mind but i've just had enough.. i'm scared for my mum, she won't listen, this guy treats her like crap, treats my brother and sister like crap, decided to throw a log at her head about 3 weeks ago (luckly she moved out of the way just in time), why would anyone put themselves in that situation. if i had kids i would never be with someone with violent tendancies because a) i wouldn't want my children exposed to people like that and b) she's teaching her kids to have no self respect by going back to him, she's teaching them its ok to be in an abusive relationship... its driving me mad....anyway time to go and have a cuppa

p.s... my lovely little brother has just seen the smiley faces and wants me to add this to my post... :shades: .... oh i love him, he's so lovely... oh hang on, he wants some more :shrug: :wall: :buttkick: :footy: :madness: :emot-partyblower: :oopsie: :cupid: :emot-highfive: :roflmao:

[groovygranny]

Honeybee, please please don't settle for the panic attacks.

Yes, you can only go so far with someone if they don't want to listen, and we can't always fix what is broken (I've seen this in my own family and in myself) but please don't pay such a high price. I have had to learn, and am learning still, that I can't always influence things the way I would like to and believe me it's bloody hard work.

Ride through the panic attacks by all means, we all know this is usually the way to go, but please don't accept them as the final and only solution. You need to find some peace in all of this, a point at which you can say "ok, this isn't how I would like it but I'm going to stay on top of it". And no, I can't say how you should find it. But I want you to have it none the less.

It sounds as though your brother and sister are very fortunate to have a sister like you, and you are probably the light in their darkness eh?

I'm an only child and never had the priviledge of siblings, but I think if I'd ever had a choice in it I'd maybe have chosen someone like you for one!

More big hugs for you :hugs::hugs::flowers:

[mirry]

how r u now ?

you sounded really upset, hope you feel better ?

[honeybee]

hi mirry. thanks for asking.. last night was truely awful.. managed to get to sleep about 6am and got a couple of hours... had lotsa panic attacks. just everything got to me. i feel so so so stupid reading over what i wrote. think i just have so much stuff locked up so tight inside and it just all got too much but hey, we all have our ups and downs. just been for an amazing walk with my lickle darling brothers and sisters, the sun is shining and things are looking up. just gotta keep on going, x x x