I took PHQ9 and GAD7 questionnaires today

[FlightlessFlamingo]

I hadn't realised I was this depressed.
I scored 25/27 on PHQ9 and 16/21 for GAD, both indicating severe depression and severe anxiety. I've never scored this highly on either of them (and I've been in some pretty bad places in my life). I feel like I've passed the point of feeling capable of asking for help. I think if I go to the gp I will just end up sitting there and crying.. and I'm NOT a tearful person. I'm quite the opposite, especially when depressed. I nearly burst into tears at work today when someone asked me if I was ok.

I don't know what I want from this thread. I just needed to say it.

[hanshan]

I don't know those tests, but if they indicate that you have high levels of depression and anxiety, then you should definitely be getting medical care. Broaching it with a doctor may cause tears, but it's the only way to go. My best wishes to you.

[randomforeigner]

Oh, it doesn't sound too good. I currently score 2/27 on the PHQ9, I just looked it up and did an online test. For me, what sticks out is the "Feeling bad about yourself - or that you are a failure or have let yourself or your family down?".

Anyway it's OK to go to the gp and sit there crying, and that's why they've got piles of handkerchiefs at their offices. I don't know if you have noticed, but they do.

I've noticed that one can feel particularly teary-eyed two or three days before one's period. Can feel like the end of the world.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Oh, it doesn't sound too good. I currently score 2/27 on the PHQ9, I just looked it up and did an online test. For me, what sticks out is the "Feeling bad about yourself - or that you are a failure or have let yourself or your family down?".

Anyway it's OK to go to the gp and sit there crying, and that's why they've got piles of handkerchiefs at their offices. I don't know if you have noticed, but they do.

I've noticed that one can feel particularly teary-eyed two or three days before one's period. Can feel like the end of the world.

That puts you at minimal depression, probably not requiring treatment. :yesyes:

---------- Post added at 07:14 ---------- Previous post was at 07:08 ----------


I hadn't realised I was this depressed.
I scored 25/27 on PHQ9 and 16/21 for GAD, both indicating severe depression and severe anxiety. I've never scored this highly on either of them (and I've been in some pretty bad places in my life). I feel like I've passed the point of feeling capable of asking for help. I think if I go to the gp I will just end up sitting there and crying.. and I'm NOT a tearful person. I'm quite the opposite, especially when depressed. I nearly burst into tears at work today when someone asked me if I was ok.

I don't know what I want from this thread. I just needed to say it.

Does your depression significantly infringe on performing daily tasks? With a score so high (severe depression) I'm surprised you are able to carry on with work.

So, could the score be wrong? Just maintaining routines, especially work, is a good sign to a GP.

If you feel you will struggle to talk to them, write down how you feel and use it as a prompt. If you can't speak, let them read it and they will be able to ask you what they need to from there but at least they will have an understanding of what you are feeling that you need their help with.

[Mercime]

I hadn't realised I was this depressed.
I scored 25/27 on PHQ9 and 16/21 for GAD, both indicating severe depression and severe anxiety. I've never scored this highly on either of them (and I've been in some pretty bad places in my life). I feel like I've passed the point of feeling capable of asking for help. I think if I go to the gp I will just end up sitting there and crying.. and I'm NOT a tearful person. I'm quite the opposite, especially when depressed. I nearly burst into tears at work today when someone asked me if I was ok.

I don't know what I want from this thread. I just needed to say it.

I read your opening post and it resonated with me, I won't go into why, but recognise when someone is desperate. You wrote it here because it's anonymous, nobody can judge you as you don't have to pretend.
Stop pretending x Please (and no, I'm not a cryer either) go to your docs. I hear why you're scared, but it's important that you get seen, and talk about how you're being affected - and your fears about HA, that physical issues won't be taken seriously. Or even better, print out what you wrote above, and take it with you. First step is always the hardest, but it's one you need to make x

PS. Plus you can write here of course, we will listen!

PPS. Didn't see your post Terry. Would agree that these feelings might be better understood if they're written down.

[Elen]

Does your depression significantly infringe on performing daily tasks? With a score so high (severe depression) I'm surprised you are able to carry on with work.

So, could the score be wrong? Just maintaining routines, especially work, is a good sign to a GP.

Not arguing that a GP places a lot of importance on this, however as someone who has battled severe depression for the majority of my life in my opinion it is not a reliable indicator of the severity of depression.

Work in itself can become an escape from your own head. A period of time where you are forced to act "normal". Like most escapes the come down afterwards.

I work but the effort leaves no energy for anything else.

Flamingo I agree with the others write down what you want to say. I usually find that it concentrates my mind and I rarely need to even look at my notes. You will not be saying anything that your GP has not heard before.

If you have a partner or friend, take them with you, again the GP will understand.

[pulisa]

I agree that these tests are not a reliable indicator of the severity of anxiety and depression. They were formulated by Pfizer, a huge pharmaceuticals company.

[skymaid]

I have to fill those in after each therapy session.

If I remember rightly I was 12 on the depression one and 14 on the anxiety. which was moderate and moderate.

I was completely unable to function (not able to work, could barely eat or sleep and needed diazepam to even get to therapy).

As my therapist says they're not really very accurate.

Even so after 9 sessions my scores are about 8 for depression and 11 for anxiety (and I can work, eat and sleep again. Going out is still a problem but getting easier).

With scores that high I can hardly imagine how hellish that must be, you have my sympathies but at least you know you can get better.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I have to fill those in after each therapy session.

If I remember rightly I was 12 on the depression one and 14 on the anxiety. which was moderate and moderate.

I was completely unable to function (not able to work, could barely eat or sleep and needed diazepam to even get to therapy).

As my therapist says they're not really very accurate.

Even so after 9 sessions my scores are about 8 for depression and 11 for anxiety (and I can work, eat and sleep again. Going out is still a problem but getting easier).

With scores that high I can hardly imagine how hellish that must be, you have my sympathies but at least you know you can get better.

So was I, that's why I question whether the scores tally with what flamingo feels.

I take your point Elen. We all differ. I was considering how I couldn't even wash let alone leave the house and work. I'm hoping flamingo feels better than the scores say, that would be much better than having to go through that battle.

[FlightlessFlamingo]

Thank you everyone. I feel a bit more supported reading your replies. I felt completely alone.

I agree with Elen on the work aspect. My work routine is the only thing I have which I'm forced to do every day. The anxiety is less there because I'm distracted and it's when I'm not working that everything floods back. I'm using all the energy I have to continue working and thought I was managing that. But this week my performance issues have been picked up (this is when my manager asked if I was ok and I completely lied and said that I was fine and I'm just a very disorganised person who is terrible at deadlines, really selling myself there lol!). Anyway this has freaked me out and now I have to force myself into more stress to catch up with all the work I'm behind on, when I really want to just get in my car and drive very far away where no one can find me.
I work alone most of the time so I don't really have to pretend too much. I don't know if this makes it easier or harder.

I will start writing something for the doctor. I think I'm finding it hard to visit the GP because after I recovered from my last bout of mental illness I moved in with my partner and left the catchment area, so had to leave my lovely trusted regular GP. I've yet to find one at my new surgery who I feel comfortable with and the two I have seen totally skipped over the fact I even mentioned anxiety in consultations. I'm thinking best to ask for a female GP but I think there is only one there so probably has a 3 week wait. 3 weeks feels like 3 years right now.

[Mercime]

Why not print out what you've written here? X

[FlightlessFlamingo]

Feels a bit weird doing that. I like things to be written for their purpose.

[swgrl09]

These tests are merely tools, they are not diagnostic. A doctor or therapist uses them as part of a diagnostic process, but shouldn't be making a diagnosis solely on the result of the tests. They can give a lot of good information, however, on what you are struggling with and can be good talking points with your doctor.