View Full Version : Going on Holiday and feel great!!!
Just thought i would tell you all the i am going away to majorca on thursday and cant wait to go. I dont even feel anxious at all. I had a bad few weeks a month ago but have been doing okay since then, even when i get my bad day, i know what is happening and how to get through them.
I was talking to a friend last night about the difference to how i react to situations and how 2 years ago the slightest thing sent me into panic and i had no control, but now similar situations arise and i can handle them.
It is hard to explain but i cant believe how i used to feel and think and how different that all is now.
Work is going well, i am coping much better with Sam, so i hope this carries on.
I am sure i will have a good holiday as i am going with 3 of my closest friends, no peace i doubt.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal!
Have a GREAT time! You deserve it! :)
Bring us all a stick of rock back!
Love Minny..xx
I have NOT failed!! Ive succeeded in finding 1000 solutions that dont work! :o)
Hi Sal
It's great that you are doing so well. I know those bad couple of weeks were difficult for you, but you coped and got through them.
I'm glad you are feeling so positive and everything seems to be going well for you. You know that bad days are just that and you know you can cope and get through them.
I'm sure you'll have great time on holiday. I look forward to hearing all about it when you return. Enjoy yourself!
Briary
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Sal,
You are doing sooo well right now, Im really :D happy
for you.
You WILL have a great holiday because you deserve it, you
have worked so hard to get where you are now.
HAVE FUN
LOVE JILLXX
hey Sal,
[Wow!] Majorca - you lucky thing!!
I'm so pleased that you are feeling much better and coping well!!
Have a great time - you deserve a break!!
Sarah :D
Merlinssister
17-10-04, 19:53
Ooh. Hols. Lovely.
Have a wonderful time!
MS
Dear Sal,
Well done for getting through your difficult time recently and now understanding more about how much your reactions to things affect how how you cope .
Have a really brilliant time and really relax and have a ball.
This is your time and being with close friends will be such fun.
We look forward to hearing all about it when you get back.
Love
Meg
Thank you all for your positive feedback. About to go of to work but already in the holiday mood, so wont be getting too much out of me the next few days. And i have already told Nic i met someone when i was out on Thursday night, well he has been in touch and he is coming over tonight. He did want to take me out but with leaving Sam when i go away she is with me and has a friend staying tonight so will get them to bed and settled first.
Love Sal xxxxx
Ooooh how exciting Sal.
Have a lovely wind down week and enjoy your dates.
Love
Meg
Hi Sal, this is really nice to hear!! Your sounding so positive!! Keep it up Sal! Hope you have a real lovely holiday...........and what about this man he he ........how nice sal! Really enjoy your holiday and you date!! Hope it all go's well for you, you deserve it!! Tara xx
Guess spoke tooooo soon!!!
Had a really bad day have felt anxious and have taken 4 5mg diazepam. First time every i have taken 4 in one day. Dont feel down but really anxious, but i do find it difficult to cope with when you get really excited about something that it can lead in to a panic attack. Anyone else suffered like that
Love Sal xxxxx
The symptoms of fear and excitement are very similar.
From Chapter 1
''There are the three familiar segments of anxiety and panic disorder: these are
• the physical sensations of fear
• these can lead to anxious spiralling thoughts and beliefs
• and these can lead to avoidance
The physical sensations of a panic attack by themselves, are not bad.
Without the other two components of a panic attack (eg the worried thoughts and behaviours such as avoidance) these sensations can even be enjoyable.
Many people go out of their way to get an adrenaline rush by extreme sports such as roller coasters, extreme rock climbing, free sky diving and the new craze of bungee jumping a intense looking forward to something and so forth .
Young children like being thrown about, swinging high as possible on swings, and older kids love assault courses and hanging upside down. What we call an adrenalin rush.
Yet we dread these symptoms as we’ve come to know them in the context of panic.''
I'm sure this is all this is Sal - looking forward to something and a bit of normal fluttering and quiet excitement about your new date
Enjoy yourself tonight
Love
Meg
Thanks Meg, really appreciate that.
Alsorts is going through my head and i have now convinced myself that i am not well enough to date. Its the first one ive had in a year and i now feel i cant cope.
Plus the excitement of holiday has sent me a bit anxious. To be honest i am not why i took the diazepam as it hasnt seem to calm me down at all.
Deep breaths and try to enjoy the night i guess.
Love Sal xxxxx
Believe me - you're well enough to date !!
A bit of diversion therapy is the best thing possible.
Love
Meg
Hi Sal
I'm not surprised you feel a little nervous about your date tonight.
I hope it goes well and you can enjoy yourself.
Briary
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
nomorepanic
18-10-04, 20:45
Hey Sal
Have a fab holiday mate - you are doing so well!
Great news about the date - you must let me know how it goes?
I am sure the panic today is related to this evening and the holiday and if you recognise that then you are in no way going back atall.
Hope you are having a lovely evening at the moment and hope to catch up soon
xxx
Nicola
Well today has been a different day altogether i have been walking around with a big smile on my face!!!! Bless!!!!
Had a really good night and had lots in common. He even offered to pick me up from the airport when i get home.
And he was as nervous as me!!!!!
Cant give all the details LOL but really enjoyed the evening, well apart from having to go to work while he had a lie in, but then again he is still at work now, so revenge is sweet!!!!!!!!
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal,
It sounds like you had a fab night Sal,
You deserve to be happy.:D
LOVE JILLXX
May your trouble be less
and your blessing be more
and nothing but happiness
come through your door..
nomorepanic
19-10-04, 19:41
Hey Sal!!
Great news about the date and it has obviously put a smile on your face:D
I hope things go ok from now on too and you have a lovely holiday.
xx
Nicola
Hi Sal
I'm so glad to hear the date went so well. It's great to hear you sounding so happy.
Not long until your holiday now. Hope you have a fabulous time.
Love
Briary xx
Excellent news !
Love
Meg
Thanks
Thought that myself but i have gone a bit negative now. Obviously as i have know him for a while i said he could stay here on Saturday night as he is travelling from his mums over 60 miles and he was very appreciative of the offer and said he would ask me again if ok. I personally wouldnt mind at all as there is someone keeping an eye on my house, but on that note have texted him tonight and havent heard back not a big issue i know that myself. But got a gut feeling if his ex finds out she will do anything to ruin it, and now i am feeling why cant it be plain sailing whereas i know with him it wont be.
Been down that road before and not prepared to play games.
Feel crap now and just want to go away on my holiday. Just when i thought i had sorted it!!!
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Sorry to hear you are not feeling too good tonight. I definitely know what it's like expecting to hear from someone and not getting a response. There could be any number of rational explanations for this and I hope you hear from him tomorrow.
I am sure your holiday will do you good. You can enjoy yourself with your friends and get away from it all for a while.
I hope the situation with him sorts itself out.
Love
Briary
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi
Got to the stage where i wish i hadnt comitted to going away, feel really anxious and not sure if i can cope.
Havent heard from Ian since monday which hasnt helped. I am used to been alone an coping well and was very shocked how he got to me.
Sam has played up all nite so feel so guilty for having my time.
Now all i can think is enjoy it but cant wait to be home on Monday night and wish it was over.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Sorry you are feel down and anxious. I don't know why Ian hasn't been in touch. It's not very considerate of him not to contact you. It's horrible waiting around for someone to get in touch, isn't it?
You were really looking forward to your holiday, and I hope you can enjoy yourself. I am sure it will do you good to have some time out for yourself. Try not to worry about everything else and concentrate on having a good time. Not easy I know.
You know you can text me if you want, but I hope you are having too much fun to even think about it!
Love
Briary
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Briary
Ian text me last night as he hadnt got my texts as his new phone had no sim card.
Still feeling anxious and trying to get Sam ready for school but she is playing up big time. Expected this so am just biting my lip and letting her get on with it.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal, firstly you have a wonderful time on your holiday and really relax and enjoy yourself. As for Ian any new relationship is nerve racking at the best of times! Just take it as it comes and believe in yourself coz you are a wonderful person who deserves a little happyness!! Ex's will always be a pain aahhh but don't let her spoil things for you, if there anything on your mind just tell him, don't hold back he might be real understanding. Hope things are ok for you today Take Care Tara xx
Hi Tara
Thanks for that. Managed to get Sam to school in the end not that she was happy at all.
I know new relationships are hard at first, been nearly a year forgotten what it is like!!!!!
I am looking forward to the break, just hope there is a bit of sunshine to relax in.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Glad you heard from Ian last night.
I'm glad you are looking forward to the break and I'm sure it will do you good. Enjoy yourself!
Briary
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
All sorted and ready to go now, been a bit of confusion over lifts and one of the girls isnt happy that we arent going to the airport all together, so thats a good start NOT.
But i am sure once we are away it will be okay.
Love Sal xxxxx
Have a great time Sal. Think of us in this wind and rain while you're enjoying the sunshine!
Briary
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Guys
Well i am home safe and sound and in one piece. Had a good holiday but really missed Sam and wanted to come home, sounds daft even though i was enjoying myself i know.
The weather was lovely and so were the apartments. All four of us got on great but i had my moments when i wanted to be alone so they left me too it.
Had quite a few cocktails and too much red wine but took a night of completely on Saturday and last night on the way home.
The plane was delayed once we were sat on it for 2 hours which wasnt too much fun, but anxiety didnt creep up on me.
I managed the five days and only took 1 5mg diazepam.
Had a bit of worry as hadnt heard from Ian when i had text and tried to call him, but when called him at work he hadnt received any of my texts etc and picked me up from the airport at 3 am this morning.
Well he has just gone as he is going to pick his dad up from Newcastle so he is having a busy few days been a taxi driver!!
Well i must say its great to be home, Sam was really pleased with all her pressies and has gone back to her friends to play then i am taking her friend Ashley and Ashleys brother swimming with Sam at 3.
Will catch up with you all soon.
Lots of love Sal xxxxxx
PS HOME SWEET HOME. Defo a home bird!!!!!
Hiya Sal
Glad you are home safe and sound.
Im really glad you had a good time mate, you deserve it!
5mg of diazepam is pretty good too (I had 8 mg on mine...lol).
Welcome back!!!
love Sarah
xx
Hi Sarah
thanks for that, but i guess we both did ok, and you were away longer than me so equals out. But the positive thing is a year back i doubt either of us would have considered been where we are now.
Hope you had a good holiday too.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
I'm so glad to hear you had a good time. You did really well, only taking 1 Diazepam.
I'm glad you heard from Ian and everything is ok there now.
I know what you mean about being a home person. Me too, although I haven't be away for more than one night in years!
I hope to catch up with you soon.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Karen
Forgot to mention pleased you are going by your real name now hon, another improvement.
I am pleased to be back and was pleased to see Ian. I know new relationships are always nerve racking at the best of time but i think when you suffer from anxiety you tend to read into things much deeper and are always there waiting for the kick in the teeth. Suppose only time will tell, but he did cuddle up to me all night which was nice.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal ,
Welcome back. Good to hear from you .
So pleased it all went so well.
Hope you had some sunshine as you're not going to get any more for a while it seems !
Ian sounds lovely ...
Love
Meg
hi Sal,
Welcome home!! Glad to hear that you had a great time - you deserved a break. I'm sure it's great to be back home though and see Sam again. We'll have to meet up at some point soon...
Sarah :D
Hi Sal
Glad to hear you had a good holiday and only needed to take 1 Diazepam. Well done you.
Home just in time to entertain kids for the half term eh!
Take care
Elaine xxx
nomorepanic
26-10-04, 20:02
Hiya Sal
Good to see you back home and safe. Glad you enjoyed the best part of it.
I bet it is lovely to see both Ian and Sam again isn't it.
Will catch up with you soon mate
xxxx
Nicola
Hi All
Best part of it was seeing Sam but she wasnt too clingy how i thought so maybe she coped a lot better than me.
Also was good to see Ian but thats just a bonus.
Yep definately glad to be home and feel so much more relaxed, but cant sleep as you can guess.
Going to get my car sorted over next week or two but something i hadnt noticed was a full tank of fuel had gone and he had left it like that. Maybe me been too generous but havent called Caroline because life is too short to argue but do feel like they have taken a big lend out of me.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal,
I don't blame you for being a bit p**ed off about the car!! Don't blame yourself though - you were just nice and expected the same treatment in return.
Sarah :D
Merlinssister
27-10-04, 20:11
Glad you had a lovely holiday. *looks out at rain* Am very jealous. :D
Hi Sarah
You are right, but i wont do it again. I know accidents happen but to just drop it of and not even try to get if fixed, then to find all the diesel gone just iced the cake.
Had an okay day today been feeling a bit anxious. My friend who didnt go on holiday with us came round last night and cut my hair, and i have arranged to get my nails done tomorrow before i go back to work on Friday. Just thought i would treat myself a little bit more. And i also bought a new pair of PJs today seen as i spend most my time in them!!!!! Lazy i know!!!.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Good on you for treating yourself. You deserve a bit of pampering.
I hope you enjoy your last day off tomorrow before returning to work.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Well i have had my nails done and can hardly type so they need filing down a bit more and i decided to get a treatment on my hair and restyled. So i have had a good day.
Was supposed to be a 12 pm start tomorrow but my boss wants day of so i said i would go in for 6.30 am, so Sam has gone to her grannies.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
I'm glad you've had a good day, and have had some pampering.
I hope everything goes ok for you back at work tomorrow.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Thanks Karen
I am looking forward to getting back into it.
Was upset over not hearing from Ian but decided i cant let anything else drag me down.
If he doesnt want a relationship i cant force that on him and i do ok on my own.
Was good to spend time with him but if it isnt meant to be i cant or he cant change that.
Another learning experience i guess.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Sorry you don't think it's going to work out with Ian. It's horrible when you hoped it was going to be a relationship and he doesn't seem to think the same way. Mind you, what do I know? I also fall for people who are out of my reach anyway.
I'm glad you're not letting it get you down.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
If it was meant to be that would be fine but got a gut feeling it isnt going to be.
Been through worse and will no doubt face it again.
Suppose it is just life and we take it as it comes.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal,
Sorry to hear that you haven't heard from Ian - hope it all works out for you!!
Good luck at work tomorrow.
Sarah :D
Hi Sarah
Work went ok, must admit i didnt do much. Went down to see Barbara my mate at tea time and stayed down there for a few hours and we just laughed so cheered me up.
She is a chocoholic so brought her 3 massive bars of chocolate back from holiday so she was happy and i think a bit embarrassed as i had brought her a pressie back.
Saw Ian at work as he passed by my office he said hello and that was it. But one of the guys who i am in charge of detailing wasnt happy, so went after him. Yes i died of embarrassment. He just said to him, that im one of his chicks (bearing in mind he is 55!!!) and nobody hurts his chicks!! Oh yes he is mad, but funny with it. Anyhow apparently Ian had said that me and him were fine. Peter asked if he would be getting in touch with me and he said yes, but to be honest have gone defensive now and dont need to be messed around.
Hate not knowing what people want or feel. He is at work on Sunday doing overtime on Barbara's wing so i will be down there so might have some crack with him. I just hope he doesnt think i am there because he is on the wing!!!
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Sorry Ian is still messing you about. I know you don't need to be putting up with that.
I'm glad you had an ok day at work and managed to have a laugh with Barbara.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
hi Sal,
Glad to hear that things went ok at work - the first day back is always tough!!
I hope things with Ian improve and that he doesn't mess you around.
Take care.
Sarah :D
Hiya
Get the feeling he is and he is hardly going to say to someone that is on my side that he doesnt care is he.
Just cant believe he can say to someone that we are ok when i havent spoken to him since tuesday.
Sent him text apologising for Peter talking to him and just basically saying that there is no pressure from me and hope we can still be ok when we see each other at work.
Cant handle no mans land at all.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
It's the uncertainty of not knowing what is happening. I get like that too. I hope you get a response from him now and find out where you stand.
He doesn't deserve you if he's messing you around.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Sal mate,
Glad you had a good holiday hon! I know what you mean though. Its good to get home afterwards as well! I am a home bird as well! LOL
How are things back at work? and with Ian. Is it still all up in the air? You really do deseve happiness mate. I hope you find it.
I'm back to work tommorow after the half term. Which has been pretty rubbish as i have had a really bad cold. My anxiety always increases when i feel ill as well. So I'm not looking forward to tommorow. Never mind. Practise my PMT hey! LOL
Anyway mate you take good care.
Lots of love PIP'S XX XX
Sal babes, where have I been? I just don't know how I've totally missed this thread :(
Glad to hear that your hol was good and that you were glad to get home too. I always like to get home to see my four-legged girlies so I can only imagine how much you missed Sam.
I'm so sorry that I seem to have totally missed all your latest news, some mate hey? I didn't even know anything was happening with Ian and I'm really sad to hear that things aren't 100% at the moment - have you got it sorted? Men, they leave you tearing your hair out in frustration at times. As someone once said to me, sometimes you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince.
Am really chuffed to hear about all your pampering - I'm desperate for a wig cut and my eyebrows waxing but I'm going to hang on until just before my graduation ceremony at the end of Nov so that I feel really nice for it.
Love ya loads hun, Jo xxxxx
Hi Jo
Great to hear from u, was going to text you to tell you the crack but you have enough on.
It hasnt worked out with Ian, which i am pretty upset about, but thats life.
Just my luck, but pick up the pieces and get on with it dont you.
Hope everything is okay with you.
Hope we can meet up for coffee soon, would love to see you. Let me know when you are free.
You have been a great mate, and thanks for that.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Pips
Sorry you havent been feeling too well especially when you have had a week of, typical isnt it.
Ian and me didnt work out, but i am okay, after Graham have a brick wall built up to protect me.
He sent some nice texts and will send you them so you can vet them as at times think i am too soft.
Will call you over the weekend.
Chin up and hope work went ok mate.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
So glad we're still mates feel so awful for not having known what was going on with you if you ever want to chat just ring me anytime at all babes.
Really sorry that things haven't worked out with Ian but the right person is out there for you, its just a case of finding him :D
Would love to catch up - I'm only in uni Tuesdays and Thursdays so any other time would be great can't wait to see you.
loads of love and hugs, Jo xxxxx
hey Sal,
The four of us really should arrange something soon!!
Sarah :D
hey Sal,
How is work going hun?
Sarah :D
Hi Sarah
I know we really should make an effort sooner than later to meet up with Jo.
Work has been okay but i did take Mon, Tues and Wed of as not feeling great. My boss kept having digs at me today as i went out of the office to see someone and he rang the wing and told me to get back to the office straight away.
It was Barbara's wing so no doubt he thought i was just gossiping with her but i had actually gone to see her boss.
Well i have been thinking about this for a while, and to be honest all the stress you go through in the office just isnt worth it, so i have kept it to myself until today but i feel i am ready to go back on to the wings.
I have had my time out from working with prisoners but feel much more confident and ready to get back into shift work etc. Hence why i went to see Barbara's boss. At the moment they have full staffing but 2 of his staff have gone for interviews for a drugs department, so he said if one of them gets the job i can go straight into that spot on the wing as soon as possible, so fingers crossed.
A girl in personnel normally would have told me before the people who got the jobs but she isnt in so i couldnt find out otherwise i would have none tonight it that space had come up.
I have spoken to Ian since we decided to be mates and he wants to go for a drink soon and have some crack. I am much more relaxed about it now, as feel i would prefer to build my confidence with a man by just been friends and seeing how it goes.
So all in all not a bad day really.
Love Sal xxxxx
hi Sal,
I'm glad that you are feeling more confident and want to go back to working the wings. If you feel up to it then you definetly should as I'm sure you will find it less stressful.
I think it's good that you and Ian are going to meet up for a drink. It will be good for the both of you to have a chat.
Sarah :D
Glad to hear that you are feeling better and have made some positive decisions and are doing something about them too ....
Good to hear from you Sal.
I know you withdraw when you're not feeling 100%.
I hope your local friends are supporting you during these times as you are naturally very social and being alone for long periods of time with worrying thoughts must be difficult for you.
Take good care , look forward to hearing that a position has come up where you want it .
Love
Meg
Hi Sal
I'm glad to hear you are feeling better, and more confident now. I hope the position on the wings you want comes up soon.
It's good that you are sorting things out with Ian and can still be friends. I hope going out for a drink with him will be ok for you.
Take care.
Love
Karen xx
Hi Meg, Sarah and Karen
Thank you for your reponses really what i needed tonight. I am so definate about going back to the wings and need that to get me back to where i started.
Meg i will withdraw if not feeling a 100% and have Barbara there to support me. I know i am a social person but feel my illness has lost a lot of friends as my time in Magaluf proved. We havent spoken since the holiday and i havent (sad to say) missed it as we have all moved on in different ways.
My biggest lost is Caroline but she lives by what her boyfriend tells her now and we cant communicate now as how she sees me is what he tells her. She doesnt remember how she was when she was on her own, so we will never be able to agree on things.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Sorry about not being close to your friends anymore, that must be really difficult.
I'm glad you've got Barbara there to support you. We all need someone.
Love
Karen xx
Thanks Karen
At times our friend dont understand and we have to live with it and been on holiday proved that to me.
I love Caroline to bits and once over she would have talked all night if i needed to but now she has changed and has a man in her life that dictates her thinking. I am gutted i have lost her but once she met him i could see that would happen.
Can only hold on to how she did understand and support me and move on from that.
Love Sal xxxxx
hey Sal,
It's a shame that you aren't that close to your mates anymore. I'm the same. I guess people change over time depending on their situations. It seems like your mate Caroline has changed because of her husband but I guess that is just the path her life has taken her down.
In a similar way, us anxiety sufferers live our lives in a certain way depending on our anxieties. I think people who don't suffer find it very difficult to be able to relate to us properly; that's not to say that we can't be good friends with people who don't suffer from anxiety but I do think it means that we are more likely to feel close to those who do suffer.
So, don't worry about the fact that you feel like you don't need your old mates as much anymore. That's just the way life goes!!
Sarah :D
Hi
I know it is hard when friends change and you grow apart. I think Caroline still expects me to be there for her and she has a go if i dont call her, but i text her about Ian on monday night and she hasnt replied so how i feel is not high on her agenda.
I have talked to Debbie who i went on holiday with and she felt a bit like me when we were away and said she wouldnt go again. So it wasnt just me been paranoid.
Work has been okay today, i dont think this guy has got the position which would free up a place on Barbara's wing but we will find out for definate on Monday.
But when i was talking to lynn at work she was great and my governor came in and we carried on talking. She said i had to go and see her on Monday and she would be happy to release me, although she doesnt want to lose me from the office, but she was supporting me when i was off sick and doesnt want me to go back wards again. So basically if there is somewhere i want to go and work until the new wing opens next June, which is where i eventually want to be based, she will do all she can and let me go. So now i have the weekend to decide.
Will have a think about my choises and discuss them with you all later, but i am off to a bonfire party now.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
It sounds like the work situation is really positive and you've got some options open for you. I hope you get the position which is right for you.
Enjoy the bonfire party!
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
hi Sal,
It's great that you will be able to work in the wings if you want to and that the people at work will do all they can to assist you. It's always nice when the people around you understand!!
Have a good time at the bonfire party!!
Sarah :D
Hi
Still up thinking about what i want to do and where would be the best for me to work, but will post about that tomorrow.
We never got to the first bonfire we were invited to as my brother rang and as we are not really close when he asked me to go up with Sam, i thought we would pop up for an hour. Well we ended staying for about 4 hours and had a really good time, we even got on to when we were children, so pleased we did it.
We still have major issues with mum and i am more inclinded to his way of thinking at the moment, and after all this time been kept apart can see how he feels.
Love Sal xxxxx
hey Sal,
Am glad to hear that you and Sam had a really good time with your brother. It sounds like you two had the opportunity to catch up, which is always good!!
See you tomorrow!
Sarah :D
Hi Sal
It's good you managed to see your brother and it seems like you had a really good talk.
I know you still have major issues with your mum, I do with mine but can't think about it at the moment. It's good if you and your brother can help each other to cope with her.
You've got the weekend to think about where you want to work, so try not to put too much pressure on yourself to think about it all tonight.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Sarah
Yeah it was good to spend time with my brother. We are both looking forward to seeing you tomorrow i just hope you dont mind if i am feeling a bit low how i have been that i am too quite.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Karen
I know you are right i have the weekend to think about it but its a major decision to make as will be back on shifts, some part of that will be good and the other will be hard.
As for my mum i am having big problems with her, and i did talk to my brothers wife tonight who only the last year i have got close to.
Other people were at his house when we had supper and what i thought was a problem on an afternoon and evening turns out that they have noticed it on a morning. Obviously the drink word but although i know she has problems i didnt realise how bad it had got.
Need time to sort this out in my head before i approach her and really need to talk to Barbara to see how she thinks i go forward on this one.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
I understand it is a big decision for you to make but I'm sure you will make the right one for you.
I'm sorry to hear your mum's drinking sounds worse. It is a lot to deal with. I'm glad you were able to talk about it with your brother and I hope he helps you with your mum too.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Karen
Thanks for that, i think my brother has got to the stage where he cant take anymore from her and just wants her to move to the house he has bought her.
Even my sister in law who i get on a lot better with said to keep away from her last night when we were watching the fireworks as she drunk and i knew i wanted to have a chilled night and not have to worry about her.
I am now waiting for someone to call and price the damage to the body work of my car, so another pay out will be needed.
Love Sal xxxxx
hey Sal,
Don't worry if you're a little low tonight!! We will do our best to cheer you up!! See you soon!
Sarah :D
Hi Sal
I hope the car quote isn't too much. Just what you don't need, especially before Christmas.
Is the house ready for your mum to move into now? You don't need the extra worry about her on top of everything else.
I hope you're doing ok today.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Karen
Yep the house is ready for my mum next week but she is refusing to move until the end of January which i cant understand, as i would have thought the way she is now a new start would be the best option.
My brother has even paid to get a conservatory built on and she has all the home comforts she needs, but still refuses to move.
They are trying to get me to get her to move sooner but she wont listen to me either and why should it be me to bully her into it.
I cant understand why when she has such a lovely house to move into that she isnt dying to get in there and get herself sorted.
The quote for my car was £120 but that included a few other scatches that i thought i may aswell get done. He said the damage they had caused was over half, so if i include the diesel i will tell the £80 He even said he would do a receipt for them so i had it on paper.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sarah and Ed
Thanks for coming over tonight it was great to see you and have some adult conversation.
Sorry if i seemed a bit quiet but just feeling really low at the moment and didnt want to talk about it infront of Sam.
Will try to get away from work early one day this week so i can tell you what is going on. You saw Sams reaction as soon as i mentioned i will be going back on shifts. Just feel like i am always thrown against a brick wall. But i did reason with her didnt i, but surely as a mum i shouldnt have to do that, explain myself whatever i do, but becomes a habit and i do it all the time.
Thank you, was great to see you both.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
I'm sorry your brother and sister in law are trying to pressure you into getting your mum to move. I know it is hard but try not to let them get to you. The responsibility shouldn't all fall to you. I can't understand why your mum doesn't want to move until January either. It sounds like a really nice house she will have. Maybe it is to do with being alone than the house itself?
I hope you get the money back for the repairs you have to get done on your car.
Sorry you're feeling a bit low. It must be difficult trying to juggle what you want to do with work and what is best for Sam.
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Thanks Karen
Hope you are feeling a bit better today.
I am just having a day doing nothing at all as i cant be bothered to do anything.
Feeling still a bit low but i think it is because i have so muh to think about at the moment and everytime i think that is a good idea another one jumps in to my head.
Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Sal
Sorry you're still feeling a bit low. It is probably the stress of trying to make a decision which isn't helping. I understand what that is like. I am hopeless at making decisions, even over really insignificant things sometimes.
I hope you are having a relaxing day. It is Sunday after all, what other excuse do you need for not doing anything?
Love
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Karen
I think it is the stress of making decisions. I have never been good at them as i have always been a bit indecisive, but i will see what happens tomorrow.
Love Sal xxxxx
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.