Mojo61
13-11-16, 07:18
Well today marks exactly one year since all this anxiety malarkey started for me. I believe the terrorist attacks in Paris kicked it off because I can remember the horror and fear I felt that something so dreadful could be happening so close to home, and were we next? A couple of days later I awoke to the most awful panic and that was the start of it really. At the time I didn't know what it was and thought I was ill so I went to my GP who diagnosed anxiety.
I've had the most awful time, I really thought I was going mad and I begged to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital. Of course the doctor refused and then began months and months of what I can only describe as a living nightmare - intrusive thoughts, panic, terror, insomnia, anorexia, my hair fell out and I lost almost 3 stones in weight. I struggled along like this for 5 months before agreeing to try meds.
On 2nd April 2016 I started on 10mg citalopram, it didn't really do much so after 3 months I increased to 20mg and I've been on that dose since. I am now working 2 full days per week and one half day, I've been on holiday to Lanzarote (where my symptoms completely disappeared for 2 weeks!) and my appetite and sleep have got slowly better.
I'm still not 100%, but I know now that no amount of tablets will help if you are not prepared to help yourself. Citalopram gave me the breathing space to make those changes and I don't think I could have done it otherwise. There is still a long way to go and I still get the odd bad day but now I can recognise it for what it is, just thoughts that I've had a thousand times before and I try hard to ignore them.
I guess what I'm trying to say to anyone out there struggling is don't give up, it is a bloody long hard road but you WILL feel better and start to enjoy life once again - it just takes time and a lot of hard work! :bighug1:
I've had the most awful time, I really thought I was going mad and I begged to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital. Of course the doctor refused and then began months and months of what I can only describe as a living nightmare - intrusive thoughts, panic, terror, insomnia, anorexia, my hair fell out and I lost almost 3 stones in weight. I struggled along like this for 5 months before agreeing to try meds.
On 2nd April 2016 I started on 10mg citalopram, it didn't really do much so after 3 months I increased to 20mg and I've been on that dose since. I am now working 2 full days per week and one half day, I've been on holiday to Lanzarote (where my symptoms completely disappeared for 2 weeks!) and my appetite and sleep have got slowly better.
I'm still not 100%, but I know now that no amount of tablets will help if you are not prepared to help yourself. Citalopram gave me the breathing space to make those changes and I don't think I could have done it otherwise. There is still a long way to go and I still get the odd bad day but now I can recognise it for what it is, just thoughts that I've had a thousand times before and I try hard to ignore them.
I guess what I'm trying to say to anyone out there struggling is don't give up, it is a bloody long hard road but you WILL feel better and start to enjoy life once again - it just takes time and a lot of hard work! :bighug1: