Absolutely zero confidence

[aarghapanda]

There are so many things I want to do woth my life, I feel too inferior to do.

I'd like to do art/be an artist, or do my pphotography for a living, or have a social life, relationships, it seems I cannot function on any human level because basically I think I'm crap

What can i do though, if I try to do anything I will fail, and if I don't I fail, so am I going to be stuck in this mess forever with everyone saying I'm lazy!

[EebyJeeby]

Ahem... we'll have less of that negative talk!

How about focussing on what you know you can do. Art and photography are great because you don't actually need to interact with anyone to do it and do it well. How about getting some artwork and photography posted up on the internet? Join a few arty discussion groups and get your self-esteem built up that way.

I've recently tapped back into my arty side and it's great. I got a little drawing published and never had to meet or speak to anyone!!! I also got some very kind feedback from others, which was a real boost and felt great so now I'm motivated to do more. I'm doing photography too as it happens.

So, you're not alone in aspiring to such things - it is possible and you CAN do it. I suspect you're pretty good at it or you wouldn't want to do it in the first place eh!

I say go for it.

Eeb x

[eastender]

Do the things you enjoy just for yourself, for your pleasure and amusement and see where it leads, even if its only you that that appreciates your efforts then thats worthwhile.

[aarghapanda]

Ahem... we'll have less of that negative talk!

How about focussing on what you know you can do. Art and photography are great because you don't actually need to interact with anyone to do it and do it well. How about getting some artwork and photography posted up on the internet? Join a few arty discussion groups and get your self-esteem built up that way.

I've recently tapped back into my arty side and it's great. I got a little drawing published and never had to meet or speak to anyone!!! I also got some very kind feedback from others, which was a real boost and felt great so now I'm motivated to do more. I'm doing photography too as it happens.

So, you're not alone in aspiring to such things - it is possible and you CAN do it. I suspect you're pretty good at it or you wouldn't want to do it in the first place eh!

I say go for it.

Eeb x

Well I did what you suggested a while ago, it really hasn't helped me, it's made me worse because nobody actually likes or looks at what I've done.

I don't think I'm any good at it, or indeed anything else, that's why I'm sat here with no decent future to look forward to.

[aarghapanda]

Do the things you enjoy just for yourself, for your pleasure and amusement and see where it leads, even if its only you that that appreciates your efforts then thats worthwhile.

In this state I enjoy nothing.

[EebyJeeby]

You sound pretty low at the moment hun. Have you seen the doc and explained the way you are feeling - all of it? The doc will be able to help you get past this and on to brighter things.

[aarghapanda]

You sound pretty low at the moment hun. Have you seen the doc and explained the way you are feeling - all of it? The doc will be able to help you get past this and on to brighter things.

yes I've been to the doc, I was given tablets that did nothing, I've tried 5 different sorts that have done nothing, I saw a Community Gateway Worker who reckons I'm just lonely and not depressed at all and just attention seeking.

So the people that are paid to help me aren;t helping me.

[Insomniac]

Hi there. Zero confidence is something I do know about. Unfortunately. Luckily for me I have had some conselling which helps a bit, and a lovely husband who believes in me. Its a long journey back to emotional health, but I am going to try. (see... I can't even say I will succeed, but i WILL try).

I feel myself thinking of my counsellor when I feel negative and think she would "tell me off" for thinking badly of myself. You wouldn't let anyone else be treated that way so why do we do it to ourselves?

I find that a small notebook with positive things for the day helps me. Even if I feel rubbish at the end of the day, thinking about small, but nice, things and writing them down helps my feelings. I try to think of 3, but sometimes I have to think hard. I can usually think of something even if its a small chore around the house like making lunch. Having a hug from my daughter. Hubby bringing me a cup of tea. Managing to do the hoovering. Allowing myself time to read my book without feeling guilty about it. Noticing the flowers coming up in the garden. Just going outside to sit in the sun for a while.

The other day I felt really low and anxious. I wanted to go to bed (and hide from it) but I went outside for 10 minutes to poke about in the herb garden. This cheered me up no end, because I cleared a few weeds and had some fresh air. Another time I put on my coat cos it was sunny, but cold, and read my magazine in the sun for a while. I felt better for being outside in the sun even though I had to make myself go. These are all positive things. No big achievement for some perhaps... but we have to appreciate the things that are achievements for ourselves. Writing these good things down even if you can only think of one makes them stronger and more worthwhile in your head.

Sorry this is long. I can't think of a short way to explain it well. Also in a way that a negative mind (like mine can be!) will understand and take a chance in believing! Hope you feel better soon.

[aarghapanda]

I find it hrd to believe sorry

[honeybee3939]

Hi

Could you ring your local Mental Health Service and ask them if there is any local groups that you could attend.
I was the same as you, i didnt do anything i didnt Socialize had no hobbys etc, but now after contacting the service, i go to a social morning on a Monday, have met lots of new friends and i also now attend a walking group on a Wednesday morning where i have met new friends too, and i have gained so much more confidence.
Im sure if you gave them a ring they would be more than happy to help.:)

Love

Andrea
xxxx

[aarghapanda]

Hi

Could you ring your local Mental Health Service and ask them if there is any local groups that you could attend.
I was the same as you, i didnt do anything i didnt Socialize had no hobbys etc, but now after contacting the service, i go to a social morning on a Monday, have met lots of new friends and i also now attend a walking group on a Wednesday morning where i have met new friends too, and i have gained so much more confidence.
Im sure if you gave them a ring they would be more than happy to help.:)

Love

Andrea
xxxx

That then depends on haing regular sleeping patterns and all that, or feeling half dead during the day as I am now lol

[honeybee3939]

But its worth a try...dont you think???:) At least then you can hold your head up high and say you gave it your best shot!

Good luck in what ever you decide to do.:)

Hugs

Andrea
xxxx

[aarghapanda]

I'm now waiting for various people to get back to me, after saying they'd get back to me 2 weeks ago

[braderz]

oi u r bein way to hard on ya sel , r u attenton seekin ? n btw i understand pal lol kinda the same 4 me but u must have sum hope left n ambition , if u think ur crap u will end up bein crap ......wb braderz