Pregnant??

[Hannahlou84]

Hiya all

I am not in a very good place at the moment. I know am probably being really stupid, but I have convinced myself I am pregnant, from one very careful night in November.. and I can’t convince myself otherwise!

I know that doesn’t make any sense really- but it’s really real. I have been ill for a while with fainting and nausea, and I have put on weight, not to mention other potential symptoms, but three tests in December, and February say I’m not. That and almost constant bleeding which is another problem.. *sigh*

I know it’s stupid, but too scared to see doctor as she’ll think I am being stupid… some reassurance would be fab… :-( Thanks

[lass]

Hi,

I think you should go see your doctor, to put your mind at rest. She won't think you are stupid at all. You are getting symptoms that concern you so you should get them checked out, for your own peace of mind.

So, would being pregnant be a bad thing for you? Maybe it's the anxiety around the "what if I am ...." that's making you feel so bad?

[sarah1984]

Hi Hannah,

I doubt very much that you are pregnant-you said you were very careful and three tests have all shown that you are in the clear. Added to that there's the constant bleeding. However, I do really think you should go to the doc-this fainting and nausea's clearly a cause for concern and I'm sure you'll be taken seriously.
Take Care, Sarah x

[Hannahlou84]

Hi Sarah and Lass

Thanks for your messages, any support at the moment means a lot to me. I know I am being very daft, and the tests were fine, and two lots of contraception were used, but I just can’t stop panicking about it. I am fine for ages, and then the feelings come back again and I have to do another test to make myself feel better-but I get embarrassed going and buying them, so that isn’t even an option at the moment.

I can’t believe how much detail I am going to go into here, and for that I am sorry- but it’s loads of little things that are niggling. The main things are my weight gain, particularly my breasts and waist (though logically I know this is unfortunately where I gain weight anyway!), but I have been really sore too.
The other major problem for me is the nausea and fainting, I feel sick most of the time, but early afternoon, regardless of what I eat/drink or don’t I end up feeling really really sick like I get really hot, and flustered and feel sick to the point of fainting- but it just doesn’t make any sense. Nothing I do seems to help- and noone seems that bothered by it..

I am all messed up in the female department anyway- what with endometriosis and PCOS, I’ve also been bleeding since last May- but again, I don’t seem to be making enough fuss to get help with it.
Lass- in answer to your question- no getting pregnant would not be good for me, I am not in a relationship- and however much I would love a baby I am not in a position to have one. That and I would be a good awful mother

I’m sorry, I know this is stupid, and logically, I can’t believe it.. but I do!!

Hannah xx

[lass]

Huge :hugs: Hannah - sounds like you need some!

My sister and a couple of friends have PCOS and I know from them it can cause your hormones to go haywire. I would guess this is possibly what is happening to you at the moment. Do you take any medication for the PCOS?

Perhaps the almost constant bleeding is making you anaemic, which would cause nausea, dizziness, fainting, etc. Has your GP checked for this?

The one thing I can really relate to is the total belief in something that you know logically is very unlikely. If I get a symptom that worries me, I focus on it and I can make myself feel things that probably aren't happening at all. Like the other day, I had a couple of days of bleeding mid cycle. This freaked me out completely, I've done nothing but worry about it since, and I'm sure I can feel something going on down there. It all feels different. But logically, it can't because I've been checked out by a nurse and other than a polyp (that I've probably had for ages) there is nothing that looks unusual. I think just focusing on it causes the mind to play tricks.

I really think you should go back to your GP. No one needs to suffer the symptoms that you have. There are probably loads of things they can do to help; you need to go and ask for them.

By the way, I've put on weight in the last year since my HA started, and I'm finding it impossible to lose. I thought maybe my thyroid was underactive, as I exercise more now than I ever have and I eat less, but tests came back ok. There is a diet book (called something like Lose the Fat around your Middle by Marilyn Glenville) that explains why we put on weight around our middle - it's to do with the stress hormone cortisol which causes us to store fat around our middle, making us apple-shaped. So constant stress and anxiety could well explain your weight gain.

Best of luck, let us know how you get on.

xx

[miss diagnosis]

I KNOW EXACTLY what you are going through. I spent two years thinking i was pregnant.(not the same pregnancy obviously)It was quite mad when i look back cos i was on the pill and used condoms etc. had negative tests and never skipped a period and i had been pregnant before so i know what it feels like.
I think it was just depression cos the guy i thought had impregnanted me treated me like crap. The father of my child was no prize picnic either and i had a difficult previous pregnancy. So your problem sounds totallu pyscological. if u think ur pregers your belly will go hard and everything! PM me anytime

[Hannahlou84]

Hi guys.

Thanks very much for your messages- again, they mean a lot..:hugs:

Unfortunately, I can’t get online too often (with privacy), as the only place I get any privacy is at my house, but that’s dial up, and it’s not my phone bill- so as you can tell, far from ideal- I have been checking responses on my phone though!! Bit sad that.. but never mind. I want to get more involved though!

Lass- I know I am already anaemic, but it is better than it has been, so I don’t really understand why the symptoms are worse than they were. I know the weight gain has probably made the PCOs more active, but am scared of that too!! Lol.. Quite ridiculous, I know!!! I wasn’t taking medication for the PCOS, no, as it stopped being a problem because I lost a lot of weight before… wish I’d kept it off now!!!! :weep:


Miss Diagnosis- thanks, you won’t believe how much that helps!!

I think the stupid thing is, this has become such an obsession because I was told it would be difficult for me to conceive, but I want that to be wrong- badly!! That or just have them take all mechanics out, if you get my drift…:blush:

[Hannahlou84]

I'm refusing to let myself do another test... but it's upsetting me.. I know how stupid it is, I do... why can't I stop? I think it's because everything else is messed up at the moment. :weep: Sorry. xx

[lass]

Hannah, can you go to a pharmacy, doctors or hospital where they may be able to blood test rather than urine test for you? I know the urine tests are something like 99% positive, and I'm not even sure if they offer the blood test any more. But if they do, would it help you accept it if you had something more definite than a home test?

Would it help your anxiety a lot if you knew for sure you weren't pregnant? Or are there other things worrying you too?

I really think a trip to the docs would be a good thing, and none of us on here think you are stupid for worrying about your symptoms and relating them to pregnancy, so I'm sure your doctor won't either.

xx

[samc100]

Oh Hannah - how awful for you. I really do feel for you. Please go to the Dr's and have a chat. I am sure they will help you so you don't feel so alone.

Hugs - you seem to have so much to deal with regarding all the female bit and pieces, I think you could need a Dr's hand to hold as well as ours.

[Hannahlou84]

Hiya all

I am really sorry for posting again, but I keep getting myself into a right tizz- and my regular doctor is on holiday.

Ok, logically, I know I am not pregnant, I’d be 5 months by now, and it’s very unusual for women to have no ‘real’ signs at all, isn’t it? I still have periods, I haven’t felt anything that couldn’t physically be something else, anxiety, or whatever, or anything that I couldn’t have made myself imagine.

It’s stupid though I have been so worried all weekend again- I don’t even have anything of a ‘bump’, not really- and I was all convinced last night that I’d made all of this fit being pregnant. Also, that me being ill a lot is more to do with me being stressed and run down (assuming that can cause nausea and dizziness etc), but then I spoke to one of my friends who has recently found out she is pregnant. She made things more complicated for me however, by pointing out that in magazines she’s read, tests can be ineffective, women can still have proper periods, and some people don’t get a ‘bump’ and don’t know they are pregnant until they give birth. In fairness to
my friend, she doesn’t understand how worked up I am getting over it. I know I am being daft, and I know it’ logically practically impossible and I would have to be really unlucky, but I can’t stop coming back to it. I don’t think I will either to be honest unless I get to August with no sign of a baby!! But I don’t think getting all the way to August is going to be so easy to handle.

Does anyone have any tips for pushing things like that aside when logic is failing? Maybe it is because I actually want a baby, or because focusing on something like that is easier than focusing on the real problems I don’t know. But I am certainly not getting involved in any ‘adult’ activities until I am certain I can handle any consequences. I’m obviously not mature enough to do this am I?

Thanks for ‘listening’, and I think it’s back to the CBT I’ve learnt to deal with this for now…

Sorry, I will post more and read others posts more when I have better connection.

H xx

[lass]

Hi Hannah,

Sorry you are still feeling so anxious about this. It's just so awful when a thought takes root in our minds and won't go away. Even when it's proven not to be logical, it still doesn't shift it.

Have you had CBT, or have you self taught? It's a good way of trying to persuade yourself to listen to more positive ideas. I find that writing things down (evidence for and against what I'm thinking) helps a lot, as you can then go back and reflect on it at later times.

From my own experience, the best thing I ever did is let the people closest to me know how I was feeling, even though I felt really silly, but it opened up channels to be able to talk about it. I also had some counselling which helped make me see things slightly different. (Although I must confess, although I have had improvement, I still can't get rid of the same old worries completely). But talking about fears is a really good thing, especially if you can find someone you feel comfortable talking to who can listen and not be too opinionated.

It is highly unlikely that you are pregnant. I think people who claim to have gone through pregnancy with no symptoms at all are usually the ones that are in denial about it (like really young girls). And the home tests are so accurate these days - the people who go through pregnancy "not knowing" would not have taken a pregnancy test anyway. From my own personal experience, from very early on there was no denying I was pregnant, I had loads of symptoms. I felt so rough for about the first 18 weeks, then went through a stage of feeling great and full of energy for about the next 10 weeks, then looking like a beached whale and gradually having less energy for the last 3 months or so. By my calculation, you'd be in the "feeling great and full of energy" stage by now. And it doesn't sound like you are.

I've been reading a couple of books recently. One called "Stop Worrying about your Health" (in which he recommends telling yourself STOP when you start thinking negative thoughts, and distracting yourself) and the other called "Overcoming Anxiety" (which uses the CBT methods my counsellor taught me, using evidence for and against my thoughts).

I do understand how you feel though, it's awful when a thought takes hold and you can't do anything to shift it. And anxiety causes so many physical symptoms they can easily trick us into thinking it's something else.

xxx