Funeral tomorrow of dear friend. Anxiety Levels At Their Peak!

[Petesy]

Hi everyone

I have so much anxiety and apprehension because it's my friends funeral tomorrow.. I don't want to take a panic attack in front of ppl at the funeral.. The last one i was at i was ready for collapsing i was that nervous... I want to pay my respects the way she knew i can..

Obviously haven't been able to sleep since her passing.. And haven't even been to my GP to tell them about it either.. Grievance and anxiety is a horrible mix.. Losing one of the nicest human beings you could ever meet is heartache of another kind..

I'm afraid i won't cope! Trying to be strong but I'm afraid :scared15:

[Fishmanpa]

I'm truly sorry about your loss :( Do you have a chill pill you can take prior?

Positive thoughts

[emmegee]

I'm sorry for your loss and that you are feeling so anxious on top of that. I'm sending positive thoughts your way.

[swgrl09]

I'm so sorry about your friend. I can't say I'm surprised you feel anxious. When my mom passed away, I literally just zoned out her entire service. I think you do what you gotta do to get through it and then take care of yourself after.

[Petesy]

Thank you for your kind replies

Fishmanpa.. Emmegee...Swgrl09

Yes Pa i do have a few valium and i know I'm gonna need to take more than one the only thing is I've got 3 left and i can't sleep my head is racing, either take 1 the now too stop this 100mph head and take 2 prior too the funeral..

My heads a mess and my heart goes out to her children so sad. :weep:

---------- Post added at 00:49 ---------- Previous post was at 00:45 ----------

I'm sorry for your loss Swgrl09, what you have just described is literally what I'm gonna be like so you've basically hit the nail on the head their.

Sorry again and thank you.

Petesy.

---------- Post added at 00:54 ---------- Previous post was at 00:49 ----------


I'm sorry for your loss and that you are feeling so anxious on top of that. I'm sending positive thoughts your way.

Thanks very much Emmegee I'll try my best to stay positive.. This is my third this year and no no-one gets use to this.. White knuckle ride all the time, as i said in the op i had to get a taxi straight after the last one felt like i was gonna collapse and the cab driver was calming me down on the way home.

Thanks again I'll need your positive thoughts :flowers:

[shakey1961]

Hi there. Unfortunately, getting through a funeral isn't going to be easy, and no-one should ever say otherwise.

However... try and get it into perspective. Where is the funeral taking place? Is it in a church with a burial after or in a crematorium? Funeral services usually take about 30 minutes, at the most and hour, and only a few minutes if you have to go to a burial afterwards.

Are there any of her other friends who know you're anxious? Perhaps you can "buddy-up" and help each other.

Also, you could sit at the back of the building and if you really do have to go out you can do so without people seeing you. I'm sure your friend who passed away would understand.

In the end, it's a short amount of time. The worst you'll feel is absolutely dreadful, but you've probably been through similar times and you're still here to tell the tale.

Then again, you never know, it may go much better than you expect, you could even smile!

I hope it all goes OK for you

[NoraB]

Hi Petesy, I'm really sorry about your friend.

I understand how you feel because I lost my friend in October. My anxiety was so bad that I feared I wouldn't be able to go. Like you, I feared having a panic attack in front of everybody but my desire to pay my last respects to my friend overrode everything else and I was determined to go. I sat at the back near the door in case I needed a quick exit but that wasn't necessary. I felt anxious but coped and forgot how I felt at one point when the vicar was telling us about her early life, which I did not know of.

I know what she went through in her last few years of life so I figured if she could do that with the courage and dignity that she showed, I could manage 45 mins in a church. I even managed to walk up to her coffin to place a rose on it. My legs were shaking but the love for my friend propelled me forwards.

I wasn't able to go to the wake. I'd already decided that it would be too much for me so I gave my flower to my other friend to throw into the lake where my late friend enjoyed to sail, which was her wish. My friend later told me that when she threw mine in, two beautiful swans appeared. I got so much comfort from that.:)

My advice is to go because you'll be glad you did and if possible to take someone with you for support. Turn up early and grab a place at the back. You most likely won't need to leave but it's reassurance that should you need to, you will be unseen. You'll be ok, I'm sure you will.

[Magic]

Hi Petesy, So sorry about your friend. I hope you go on alright tomorrow.
We were at my husbands mate's funeral same day last week.
I took a chill pill and sat near the back.
I was the only person who had to have a drink of water in a private room.
Will be thinking of you:hugs:x