Depression at Christmas etc

[mezzaninedoor]

For some people, Christmas can be a stressful time. While for many, Christmas is a time for celebration, relaxing and holidays, it is also the most likely time of the year for many people to experience anxiety and depression. Those who have experienced some relationship or family turmoil may find this time of year particularly difficult. I know last year, 2015, I was in a really bad funk over Christmas and deciding what to do about anything was so so hard.

Then on top of that you can also feel increased financial pressure from the costs of buying presents and entertaining family and friends. As well as this there can be added strain on relationships from spending more time with family members than usual. Those with complex family structures or difficult relationships may feel the strain more than others. I'm lucky with my family but there are still divorces and some strained relationships to navigate.

Apparently focusing on kindness and gratitude this season can help you cope with the depression, stress and anxiety? Listing 3 things you are grateful for every day or helping others with random acts of kindness re-wires your brain creating more resilience.

Do you have anything to maximise harmony at Christmas time?

Here is also another article on Depression at Christmas:-
https://themighty.com/2016/12/when-you-are-dealing-with-depression-during-christmas/

[SLA]

Thanks for sharing the article.

Kindness and gratitude go a long way to help alleviate the fog of depression.

I've had days in December where I woke up not wanting to face the day, and after straightening myself out, and focussing on all of the reasons I have to be positive, I get a buzz. I've turned around days I would have previously written off just by taking a quiet 5 minutes to list things I am grateful for.

It's been hard this year. Compared to last year where I was in a completely different situation.

You become what you focus on.

If you choose to focus on all of the things missing/broken in your life you will soon feel despair.

If you choose to focus on the things you do have and the things that work you will feel joy.

Sure... if you are in a rough situation, it might be difficult. But giving yourself a break from the stress just to simply focus on small pleasures will work wonders and start to form a foundation to turn things around.

Merry Christmas to you!

[MyNameIsTerry]

Great posts guys!

I struggle with Xmas. With my OCD issues being very ingrained around daily routines, it has been one hell of a battle to break up routines which initially dragged me out of sitting around scared to do anything. A case of how healthy behaviours become unhealthy in some respects.

So, Xmas means a spot of forced exposure therapy. Routines get turned on their heads and sometimes I rise to the challenge and others I struggle. I can't put a root cause on it a lot of the time, sometimes it's obvious. The biggest issue is probably how I feel physically coupled with the thoughts about what to do, how to feel, etc because I'm up & about at a time when I'm not normally. Basically, a case of aversion to change coupled with some avoidance.

The last few weeks have been up & down. I've forced my sleep to suffer and get out to do shopping. Some days it was good, others it was harder because I was having one of my anxiety/med blips where the adrenaline has built up so agitation comes into play.

Just got to keep going though and try to get the subconscious to learn things are ok outside of the routine.

I doesn't depress me these days. I get the odd low mood but it can be fixed with food, drink, exercise, etc. Before the high strength Omega 3 the mood swings since this med made those lows quite bad.

The first few days of last Xmas were really good. Some anxiety but I coped and enjoyed a lot of it. Sadly, the next 10 days were lots of fatigue but I think I've got more of a handle on that now.

We used to have a support thread for Xmas on the GAD board and it was getting plenty of daily posts. Sadly, I guess we all drifted apart.

[swgrl09]

Lots and lots of self care. Also it's important to say no ... like if it's too hard to go to tons of holiday events, it's ok to set limits and only do what you can handle.

I am doing more yoga and trying to find time to breathe. Finances were tight so I am making cookies for family instead of buying gifts (besides my husband and little nephews).

Sometimes doing volunteer work can also help find meaning around this time of year if you are struggling.

[Nik2502]

I'm very low at the moment. I lost my mum nearly five years ago and it brings back how much I miss her. My dad is in a home and I've had a very stressful year with him. To top it off I had a ridiculous fight with my manager that was totally blown out of proportion.
I was fine last Saturday. Woke up on Sunday depressed and anxious.i don't know what to do with myself. I want to feel happy but don't. I'm frightened.

[Fishmanpa]

I posted this in another thread but it's worth repeating. Minus the hub hub and spiritual significance. Holidays are just another day on the calendar. With what I'm dealing with in my life, I've taken that approach this year as I've done in the past. In my past there were times that the holidays brought sadness due to my life situation at the time (illness, alone, etc.) and I've "learned" to take the approach I speak of.

It's all well and good to approach it as a "season" of giving and good will but I've personally taken that past a "season" and adopted that attitude all year 'round. Why does it have to be Christmas or a birthday to buy someone a gift or to donate to a charity? The positive aspects are advantageous to one's attitude and spirit.

Again, in the past when faced with the holiday blues, I've done as little as necessary... Retreated to my cave so to speak and then after my 1st marriage ended, gifts to my kids and a few close friends of course and participated in the office party gift exchange etc. but refrained from decorating and the like. Of course, in good times, throwing myself into the spirit was and always is a blast!

It's also interesting observing the holidays from that perspective. For years as a musician, New Year's Eve was the big gig. Pay was double or triple etc. I recall many a New Year when I would be watching others from the stage partying and pretty much making an @$$ of themselves. I also recall one of the first New Years I wasn't performing and the last thing I wanted to do was go out. That year was quietly spent at home alone watching a movie, the ball drop in NY and going to bed. Since then, There have been times I went to bed prior to midnight! The same with Christmas. There's something freeing about not dealing with the crowds and craziness of the holiday season. I recall purposely doing my food shopping late at night to avoid the crowds in the grocery store. Again... looking at it as just another day that civilization has attached significance to.

I never explored the psychological significance of my methods. Perhaps it's a way to protect myself from negativity but it's worked for me :)

Positive thoughts

[unsure_about_this]

I tend to not like Christmas as much now and not because of the Christmas experience we had as kids.

I mean Christmas has not been the same since my Dad lost his parents, his Dad 1998 before Christmas, his mum summer 2000, my great nan in January 2009,

We are all getting older no children (well my cousins who are 5,3,1 who are in usa currently)

socially with friends tricky when you dont have many friends or few friends

sometimes i get bored with tears