question aimed at anxiety sufferers with partners

[Keep going]

Hi, the question i want to asked is how you got into relationships. From my point of view, my anxiety effects all aspects of my life including relationships and social situations. I'm just wondering about your storys, which in turn can help myself by looking at your experiences. and maybe help me understand what direction i can take. and understand what i need to do to help myself.

stu

[kazzie]

Hi Stu

I met my husband on the internet!!!

I was already in an unhappy marriage

Went for first and second date with him and a "friend"

When we moved in together a few days later he asked me to go to sainsburys for loo roll I explained I couldent do supermarkets!!!

He is my rock and now I can do most things lol

Good Luck

Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:

[kate]

I met my hubby before the anx/depression.

Kate

[nomorepanic]

I met Alex at work and he was then just a good friend. I was with someone else at the time but he left me as he couldn't cope with the panic/anxiety I had.

Alex carried on coming to see me at weekends and things took off from there so he already knew what I suffered with.

[honeybee]

i knew my fella before my anxiety.. we lost touch... got back in touch... he said he'd always been madly in love with me... i said i felt the same too but i was agoraphobic now... we arranged to meet lotsa times... i backed out of it lots of times (was very scared)... we stayed in touch... then i decided to 'just f-ing meet him'... i did... it was scary... we had great time... it stopped being scary... fell in love all over again... living with each other now... sorry if thats not much help to you... dont think i would be with anyone if we hadnt got back in touch cos i'd be too scared to go out and do the whole dating thing

[Insomniac]

I met my husband before the anxiety started. Though I was already being treated for depression (for the 2nd time) when we met. When I say I wonder why he "puts up with me", he says its warts and all. Everything is a part of who I am, and everything we go through makes us who we are. He's lovely!

This may not seem to reassure you for meeting someone. But it shows that not everyone is put off by illness or difficulties.

[Magpie]

My anxiety comes in severe episodes punctuated by periods of relative 'normality', so I've not had the same problems around getting out and socialising that you've had Stu, but I can confirm what the others have said about people being willing to put up with anxiety. Not everyone is though, so it might take a couple of goes before the right person comes along!

I'm married now, and was having a bad time of it when I met my Husband but he just let me get on with it, didn't make a fuss at all, even 'though my behavious was kind of strange.

I guess the only thing you can do it take it slow and think of places you can go to meet people where you'll feel as comfortable as possible, like maybe pubs or clubs would be too intimidating an atmosphere but perhaps you could meet someone through going to an evening class, or joining a local group who do something you'd like to try such as rambling or something.

If that kind of thing isn't for you, don't give up hope - the most important thing is to remember that you might meet the right person any time, any where and to try and open up as much as possible - the anxiety can make you shy and embarrassed, but trust other people to see you in a positive way and they mostly will.