View Full Version : Please help me I'm so petrified
Hi everyone,
I'm sorry if I annoy anyone. I'm really really struggling at the moment. A family member has fallen seriously ill and I'm having to stay home alone for a while and care for our baby. Since about 4 months ago I've been really struggling with my symptoms. I've had dizziness, muscle loss, weight loss, twitching, numbness, constant tingling, brain fog, severe fatigue and now I've developed no appetite and now feel I struggle to swallow etc ans I've got a really hoarse voice which has been constand for a few weeks now and has got worse. I keep getting moments where my muscles like tense up and got really tight for now reason especially in my calf. I find walking feels strange and there's something not right with me. I've had bloods which were normal. Normal test x ray and normal eye test. I'm literally in turmoil so petrified that this is Ms als or mnd. I don't know whay to do with myself. Ive been refered to nueroglist but that's not for months and I fear I'll lose capacity before then and I won't be able to look afyer or enjoy my baby anymore. Please help calm me down.
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Also I get muscle cramps and all my bones click. I'm so worried. Sometimes I feel like I need to end it all before its top late and I lose the ability to do things. Just thoughts but it's so scary I just wsny to know what's wrong with me.
I have been getting weird feelings in my legs also over past week. I get tons of twitches all over my body. Calfs being the worse. What I am noticing here is everyone worrys of ALS and ms. So anxeity must play a huge role in twitching and the symptoms.
I haven't noticed any weakness in my body. I did start walking past few days which seems to help some. The soreness is not as bad but the weird feeling is still
There somewhat. What I
Do know I have been to dr around 7 times last year from heart to colon cancer worry and everytime it comes out fine. It has taken a toll on my family and gf to point I try to not even tell them what I am thinking or ask them questions.
I also have seen many on this site say they have the same symptoms as me and sometimes more and they get clean bills of health when seeing neuro and having Emg and mri's done. Which also makes it hard for me to run off to see a neuro and demand testing that I don't have health insurance s for and that if it comes back clean then I look like I'm even more crazy to my family and gf once again.
Also my twitches did not start till 2 weeks after I ended up in ER with panic attack and chest pains
A few key points: and nxt had some great ones as well.
1) ms and als are some fan favorites for hypochondria. Why? Because they effect the nervous system, just like anxiety does. So when our anxious bodies do strange things to our tired out and oversensitized nervous systems, we panic and assume the worst.
2) a ridiculous amount of people on this site and other health anxiety forums are afraid of these two neuro nasties. Now with ms being rare, and als being very very very rare, imagine if every person who was afraid of these two things ended up getting diagnosed. Especially as most of the hypochondriacs suffering from these two phobias are under the age of 40, more often than not have no family history of neurological diseases, and fall out of the risk range. Wouldn't make the diseases very rare then, would it?
3) all diseases have a pathology that doctors look for when chasing a diagnosis. Diseases, by nature, behave a certain way in every individual they attack. I know three people with ms, and their initial symptoms prior to diagnosis line up with every text book example. Two have a family history, one doesn't. All three either partially or completely lost their vision at random, or loss use of one limb, or one side of the body, at random. I know one person with als, he presented with slurred speech and was diagnosed with bulbar at age 56. Not sure if there's family history there or not. What I'm trying to say is: ms typically presents with loss of motor power in a limb or limbs suddenly, or loss of vision. Als is diagnosed by measurable clinical weakness in one part of the body and accompanying atrophy. Regardless of the little differences that people may experience, that's the diagnosic criteria.
4) the more symptoms you have, the less likely it is to be something sinister. If you were on here complaining that you can't see out of one eye, or that your right foot is dragging, or that for some reason you can't open bottles of water anymore at all...then I would say you should probably see a doctor. Everything you've listed I've experienced, as have many other people on this site with these same exact fears.
So now the big question, what are you doing for your anxiety? Are you letting it run your life with these intrusive thoughts of being ill, or are you working on getting it managed? The longer you wait, the harder it'll be, and the further you'll slip into the neurological disease rabbit hole. Ask any of us on this site and across other boards, it's not a pleasant place to be.
Thank you so much for your comment. I'm seeing a councellor which isn't really helping at the moment. My symptoms are so strong that I struggle to let anything break down that barrier of fear. I've got bad acid at the moment and for about 3 weeks I've had a quiet hoarse voice, slowly getting worse accompanied by a lump in the throat horrible taste in mouth and constant throat cleaning/trouble swallowing. Of course this all points to acid reflux, but ne being me I've Google and of course found out that these diseases can affect voice box ans cause trouble swallowing etc. And there the cycle starts again because every symptom I get points towards those diseases. I wish I could find a way to stop my mind catastrophizing, it's so hard. X
Duke are you having counselling or therapy? I've had both and counselling is basically just a 'shoulder to cry on' from my experience. Therapy is the best option for you in my opinion. Counselling didn't do anything for me either although it was nice to talk to somebody unbiased.
Councelling. I've been refered for cbt but waiting list is extreme long.
Having been through this fear, I can tell you that this broke the horses back for me. I've struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life, including somatic symptoms, and tried to "push through" it for years and years and years. I ignored my symptoms, I let myself have panic attacks, I gave into my depression. I was living in a state of constant stress on my mind and body. Once I began developing health anxiety, things changed a bit. The panic was worse, the anxious and intrusive thoughts were worse, and the depression hit harder. Once I fell into the als band wagon, all hell broke lose. That was quite literally, the final straw on the sega that has been my anxiety. I literally stopped functioning as a human being.
The fear was so incredibly strong that I was forced to get on medication (my doctor has been trying to get me to take something for years and I kept refusing). It was the only thing that helped me, and after a few months I began to feel normal. The only reason I'm back on these threads is because I stopped taking my meds a month and some change back, and fell right back into this hole.
My recommendation while you wait for cbt? Medication. I couldn't beat this beast on my own.
Thank you so much for your comment. I'm seeing a councellor which isn't really helping at the moment. My symptoms are so strong that I struggle to let anything break down that barrier of fear. I've got bad acid at the moment and for about 3 weeks I've had a quiet hoarse voice, slowly getting worse accompanied by a lump in the throat horrible taste in mouth and constant throat cleaning/trouble swallowing. Of course this all points to acid reflux, but ne being me I've Google and of course found out that these diseases can affect voice box ans cause trouble swallowing etc. And there the cycle starts again because every symptom I get points towards those diseases. I wish I could find a way to stop my mind catastrophizing, it's so hard. X
I also had crazy acid reflux when my anxeity started and I think anxeity doesn't help it. Maybe from not eating as much of your body going into overdrive? Not sure. And also people who have the bulber ALS causes the person to sound drunk (slurring). Like you would be talking to your family or friends and they would think you been drinking. Even when you had none. And if you can still swallow food when eating you don't have swallowing problems.
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Things we need to feed off of us that I have seen tons of threads of people worried with ALS and ms fears. That's saying a lot right there. I mean just now the first page of health anxeity on here has 2-3 threads of people worrying over same thing. That's not counting people like me who rarely start threads and reads who is worried about it too. Only around 6,000 people get diagnosed with ALS in the US a year. It seems like a lot but really isn't when there is over 380 million people living in the US.
That's not counting your chances are lower at a younger age of under 50 and even more under age 40. And not counting people with ALS and MS that runs in their families have higher risk then someone who doesn't have it in their families.
If you need someone to talk to that is going through same things as you I am here you Re more then welcome to pm me anytime. I probably check this site more then I should
I got this twitching when I was most anxious abbout tingling and itching in my legs, the minute I stopped worrying about it (because another worry took it's place) it completely vanished.
I got this twitching when I was most anxious abbout tingling and itching in my legs, the minute I stopped worrying about it (because another worry took it's place) it completely vanished.
I wish mine stopped but mine stays around. If I sit at my desk then my legs are firing away like firecrackers. It's been almost a year idk if it will ever really go away lol.
Constant throat clearing can cause hoarseness.
My walking feels funny when I think about it, but is OK when I don't think about it.
Tense breathing causes numbness and tingling. Keep remembering to slow down your breathing.
Does this sound like it could be GERD? I had a private over the phone appointment with a doctor who said GERD from my symptoms of trouble swallowing lump in throat feeling feeling nauseous and acid feeling witj burps etc and hoarse voice. He prescribed omeprazole. I'm so paranoid it's something sinister causing this. So so worried.
Yes and from what I believe Gerd is very common even in those without anxiety etc. Is the hoarse voice constant? I only ask as I wake up every morning with a hoarse voice and Googled it and that is normal.
It's constant it's always there. Is that a bad sign?
I wasn't meaning if it's constant it's a bad sign I was just meaning I personally get it every morning. If it was a bad sign, do you really think the GP would have just told you it was Gerd?
What do you think? That's the important thing.
Take the meds, watch what you eat and you will be fine.
It doesnt matter what we think, it matters what your doctor told you. Believe him, please.
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