Big discussion with dad over medication (RANT)

[mismashful2]

Hi everyone, I'm a 19 year old girl with OCD/GAD.

I went to see my psychiatrist yesterday, because I have really disturbing negative thoughts which I don't want. This all because I had a really rough adolescence growing up (divorce of my parents). At the moment, I'm living with my dad, he's really nice, but he has hit me before and he's also very controlling, and doesn't want me to live on my own in my university city for example.

So, my psychiatrist prescribed me escitalopram 10mg, from which I took 5mg today, but I feel AWFUL. I know that these are the side effects, but they are horrible. I wasn't ready to take them, but my dad pushed me, although my mom and boyfriend were against. Also my GP said that it was for too heavy for me (but I still think a psychiatrist knows more about this kind of stuff?) so she said to me that I HAD to stop!

So, I adressed to my dad that I would like to try it by myself one more time, by trying cognitive behavior therapy (which I haven't tried before) and he said that that was impossible, that if I stopped that I would always be in this anxious state, and he said that if I stopped he would bring me to a psychiatric clinic.

Now, you have to understand that I have an extreme fear of death and a fear of committing suicide, but I have OCD over it, so it's more like 'do I really don't want to do it??? maybe I want to!!??'.

So I responded to him that I knew one girl who was admitted to a psychiatric ward, and that the reason was that she tried to commit suicide. And then he said to me well yes, it's to prevent that you do that that I want to bring you there, and now I'm just SO scared, i don't know what to do.

I want to stop the pills, but what if that makes me suicidal? And + my dad will be really mad if I get anxious when I stop the pills,.. pff,

SORRY FOR THE RANT!

[.Poppy.]

Sorry you're going through this - it sounds rough for sure.

First of all, I do think you need to see a therapist, meds or not. It's helpful to have someone experienced with mental health who can give you an educated perspective. Besides which, therapy + meds is really the ideal combination.

People tend to make a really big deal out of antidepressants and other MH medications. Thing is, they can be a bit rough to adjust to and coming off can be rough in the side-effects department too, but otherwise, they're really not that big of a deal.. If they help you, great, if not you try something else.

Take a deep breath. The fact that you are so concerned about being suicidal means that you aren't really suicidal. That's just the OCD working it's magic on you.

Can I ask, is there a reason you're only taking 5mg when you were prescribed 10? Did your psych give you plan to taper up or are you trying to avoid just taking the whole pill?

[mismashful2]

Sorry you're going through this - it sounds rough for sure.

First of all, I do think you need to see a therapist, meds or not. It's helpful to have someone experienced with mental health who can give you an educated perspective. Besides which, therapy + meds is really the ideal combination.

People tend to make a really big deal out of antidepressants and other MH medications. Thing is, they can be a bit rough to adjust to and coming off can be rough in the side-effects department too, but otherwise, they're really not that big of a deal.. If they help you, great, if not you try something else.

Take a deep breath. The fact that you are so concerned about being suicidal means that you aren't really suicidal. That's just the OCD working it's magic on you.

Can I ask, is there a reason you're only taking 5mg when you were prescribed 10? Did your psych give you plan to taper up or are you trying to avoid just taking the whole pill?

Hi! Thanks for your quick reply, really appreciate it! My psychiatrist prescribed 10mg, but he said to take 5mg for the first 5 days!

I've already been in therapy for 8 months, but that's talking therapy, and it doesn't seem to help, and that's why my dad doesn't like me to do any more therapy..

[.Poppy.]

Maybe try another therapist? Sometimes we just don't jive with certain people and that's totally okay. I went through a few therapists before I found one that actually helped me :)

[machassan]

Hi mis,
You have a fear of death and ... There is nothing called " fear of suicide !! The actual fear is that you fear of either losing control and commiting suicide or fear of deterioration up to the level of suicide
Remeber , suicide is voluntary action , it is tatally under your control and desire
You will not commit suicide unless you want to die !
Your friend is depressed up to the level of "wanting to commit suicide" not to the level of losing control to suicide
Then you may ask what if i get depressed till the level of wishing to die "
The answer is : at that level you don't fear death
So you don't have to fear !!!
It is a viscious circle
Just an immaginary fear
It is like those who fear that he may kill someone !
The core is a cognitive error that you may lose control
The cognitive correction is that your behavior is totally under your control
Nothing to fear from

N.B I am psychitric resident

---------- Post added at 20:03 ---------- Previous post was at 20:02 ----------

Hi mis,
You have a fear of death and ... There is nothing called " fear of suicide !! The actual fear is that you fear of either losing control and commiting suicide or fear of deterioration up to the level of suicide
Remeber , suicide is voluntary action , it is tatally under your control and desire
You will not commit suicide unless you want to die !
Your friend is depressed up to the level of "wanting to commit suicide" not to the level of losing control to suicide
Then you may ask what if i get depressed till the level of wishing to die "
The answer is : at that level you don't fear death
So you don't have to fear !!!
It is a viscious circle
Just an immaginary fear
It is like those who fear that he may kill someone !
The core is a cognitive error that you may lose control
The cognitive correction is that your behavior is totally under your control
Nothing to fear from

N.B I am psychitric resident

---------- Post added at 20:06 ---------- Previous post was at 20:03 ----------

Escetalopram is ssri medication that all have initial anxiety exacerbation , some psychiatrist prescribe anxiolytic medication with it for the firsr 2 weaks of treatment