skymaid
16-02-17, 11:42
Hi all,
I don't visit the site much anymore, I just pop in the forums now and again to see if i can offer any encouragement to any on the same meds as me.
Anyway after 6 months or so i'm finally almost "better". I feel like i'm emerging from under a cloud and my emotions are more real again. I'm not lost in my own head in a swirl of thoughts and worries.
At the start of this 6 months when had a "breakdown" life was barely worth living. I couldn't eat, sleep, leave the house or barely move from laying down. Horrible. Truly horrible, wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Today I feel fine 5 days out of 7 at least and the days i don't aren't a panicky nightmare. I have nervous and get anxious about things but I realise that's ok. Nerves can't hurt you, they just make you feel crap but it passes. Also as my doctor says, everyone will have 5-6 (or more) random symptoms per week and 99.9% of them are meaningless. Like the dull ache I had in my right side this morning. Muscle cramp? Liver disease? Cancer? The answer to those questions is a brutal: who cares. And that ends the mentally distressing argument. Ending internal mental arguments has been the key for me.
I still have emetophobia to a degree so I still worry if a food might make me sick but if a thought comes along "what if that makes me sick" the answer isn't to argue internally for and against it's to give a internal vague answer "maybe" "hmm that's a thought". Anything that ends the argument.
It's taken me 3 months of therapy to realise the internal arguments are what make me anxious and the anxiety then causes physical symptoms which can then lead to more anxiety and the loop conintues. End the argument.
But until your mind has had time to rest and heal I don't think you can think clearly enough to realise that. Mindfuless meditations are a nice way to give you mind a little rest and they're also a great way of retaking control of your thoughts and concentration.
I'm not criticizing medication at all as i'm still on pregabalin and the odd diazepam but for me the long term answer is to take control of my thoughts and retrain my brain. Takes A LOT of effort and practice (like anything worth it) but once you start to see results it's amazing.
Anyway i've waffled longer than i intended.
On my blog i've categorized my notes after therapy that i learned as i went along.
Hopefully they will help someone.
I'm not writing so much on the blog these days because i'm too busy living life :D
https://nervousbreakdownblog.wordpress.com/category/therapy-notes/
I don't visit the site much anymore, I just pop in the forums now and again to see if i can offer any encouragement to any on the same meds as me.
Anyway after 6 months or so i'm finally almost "better". I feel like i'm emerging from under a cloud and my emotions are more real again. I'm not lost in my own head in a swirl of thoughts and worries.
At the start of this 6 months when had a "breakdown" life was barely worth living. I couldn't eat, sleep, leave the house or barely move from laying down. Horrible. Truly horrible, wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Today I feel fine 5 days out of 7 at least and the days i don't aren't a panicky nightmare. I have nervous and get anxious about things but I realise that's ok. Nerves can't hurt you, they just make you feel crap but it passes. Also as my doctor says, everyone will have 5-6 (or more) random symptoms per week and 99.9% of them are meaningless. Like the dull ache I had in my right side this morning. Muscle cramp? Liver disease? Cancer? The answer to those questions is a brutal: who cares. And that ends the mentally distressing argument. Ending internal mental arguments has been the key for me.
I still have emetophobia to a degree so I still worry if a food might make me sick but if a thought comes along "what if that makes me sick" the answer isn't to argue internally for and against it's to give a internal vague answer "maybe" "hmm that's a thought". Anything that ends the argument.
It's taken me 3 months of therapy to realise the internal arguments are what make me anxious and the anxiety then causes physical symptoms which can then lead to more anxiety and the loop conintues. End the argument.
But until your mind has had time to rest and heal I don't think you can think clearly enough to realise that. Mindfuless meditations are a nice way to give you mind a little rest and they're also a great way of retaking control of your thoughts and concentration.
I'm not criticizing medication at all as i'm still on pregabalin and the odd diazepam but for me the long term answer is to take control of my thoughts and retrain my brain. Takes A LOT of effort and practice (like anything worth it) but once you start to see results it's amazing.
Anyway i've waffled longer than i intended.
On my blog i've categorized my notes after therapy that i learned as i went along.
Hopefully they will help someone.
I'm not writing so much on the blog these days because i'm too busy living life :D
https://nervousbreakdownblog.wordpress.com/category/therapy-notes/