Been signed off work for nearly 3 months need some advise

[Hiphopforever1]

Hello I have suffered with anxiety and depression for 9 years now and since I have had anxiety things haven't really worked out for me I have had quite a lot of jobs and had to leave because of my anxiety, it is ashame because before I was a really confident person but because I have had a lot of heartache with relationships and other things it has made very unconfident and anxious, I am going to get to the point I need some advise I have been signed off work now for nearly 3 months now and I should be going back tomorrow but I really don't feel well enough to go back but I have ran out of sick notes now and if I want another one I have to see my gp and I have made an appointment but have to wait till the 10th March. My employers have been really good considering my illness and haven't forced me to go back but my parents think I should go back now and my parents think I have been back already but I lied I went in but I didn't because I felt so anxious, I hate lieing to my parents I don't like disappointing them and I feel like I am, I really don't know what to do because I don't want to lose my job because of my anxiety again and be back to square one but I really don't feel well enough to go back can someone please help me????. Some of my friends don't understand why I am off and one of my friends has been horrible to me because she doesn't understand why I am not going into work it's so hard to be normal with my friends too I think I am beginning to get social anxiety, things aren't going my way atm. The last time I was at work was ok Christmas Eve and haven't been in since. My supervisor is very understanding which is good but I feel like I am letting people down if I don't go in, I am still on the rota at work but I think soon they are going to get annoyed at me and fire me. I really need some help???????????, I am not taking any medication I used to but it used to make me worse, also I am seeing a private counsellor, is there anything I can do to make me better???

Thank you for your time reading this

Would love if someone could help me feel like I am going crazy

[Cusper]

Hi hiphop! Ok so you have a therapist? Do you have any idea where your anxiety comes from? Is it health you are always worried about? What causes you to worry?. 9 years is a really long time to have this. Do you take medication? How about food?

I have terrible anxiety as well. Therapy has really helped. Mind you it takes the RIGHT therapist and hard work to overcome. And even then I don't know if there is such a thing as overcoming something, more like managing the problem. I am 41 and I know where my anxiety comes from for the most part so knowing where it comes from also helps. Have you read any books on anxiety/and or depression?

I think what you need to do is really get honest with your family and tell them because that is probably adding to the pressure on you. Then I think you should see if there are any support groups. If you could ask your counsellor if there are any groups that you could go to so you have a safe place where others have the same issues. Support groups can really help. Also, it's really important to do everything and anything to get yourself help. Youtube has tons of Ted Talks on both of those subjects. Also with others who have made their own videos. Diet is huge for people with anxiety and depression as well. If my diet is bad so is my anxiety. I would definitely steer clear of caffeine. Ok I feel like I am really rambling.

Educating yourself as much as you can on anxiety and making steps everyday towards your recovery. I can tell you that isolation has to be the worst thing for both anxiety and depression. You need to reach out to the people that can truly help you. It will probably take everything you have to get better. But if you have the will it will happen. I know that every time I have spurts of extreme anxiety and depression there is something that I am deeply afraid of dealing with. Please if you can just tell your family what you are feeling and go and get help. Start with your counsellor or your family doctor and tell them everything you have here.

[cattia]

I have suffered from anxiety since my early twenties and I am now 40! I have had times when it's been very hard for me to keep working because of panic attacks and severe depersonalisation that have made me feel truly awful. However for the most part, I have managed to stay working apart from a couple of weeks off when things were at their worse. Firstly I would say did you give the medication a fair shot? A lot of anxiety and depression meds can make things considerably worse at first and it takes several weeks to see any improvement, but for me getting on the right ones gave me my life back when I was younger.
I used to get through work by having daily lists. When I was really ill I couldn't deal with the thought of a day at work as it was very overwhelming to me. I would feel like I couldn't do it, so I had a list just to get me there. It had everything I needed to do on it, like get out of bed, brush teeth, get dressed etc and I would only allow myself to think about the one thing on the list that I had to do next. It helped me to stop getting overwhelmed.
Finally, if panic attacks are the problem, you need to find a good therapist who you can work with to deal with them. The more you fear them, the more likely it is that you will have one, but if you have some strategies to manage them when they happen, they eventually get less intimidating. The longer you stay off work, the bigger the barrier will be in your mind to going back, so bear in mind that if you wait until you feel ready, that day may not come, it may be more a case of learning to manage your anxiety while you are there. Best of luck!