Hypochondria causing great anxiety and depression

[Libra96]

Hi all, I'm a 20 year old female and have been a hypochondriac for many years but it's usually triggered by what I feel are symptoms of horrific diseases. I suppose it started when I was 14 and convinced myself I had breast cancer, not realising at the time it was puberty changes, and my grandmother died of breast cancer when I was 12 so I suppose I had that in the back of my mind. I thought it for a good couple of years despite it being so incredibly unlikely, and I knew that but wouldn't stop worrying. Then when those fears left, at 16 I had a check up and the nurse (who clearly did not believe being a vegetarian is healthy) suggested I had a blood test for anemia. I was terrified of anything medical so the blood test itself sent me into panic, and after I started worrying about things that could go wrong in your blood, so I thought I might have leukaemia, because I always had bruises. Anyway, I wasn't anemic or anything and eventually those fears went. But then about three years ago I stated having bowel problems, which seem to point to ibs, and being a young female it is very likely but I read an article the other day that bowel cancer has identical symptoms to ibs and now I believe that's what I have and I'm in and terrible state of anxiety and feeling depressed. On top of that I noticed three years ago that I can see my heartbeat in my stomach and left breast and this really freaks me out and every time I look at it I feel like it can't be normal.
My goal is to go to the doctors about my bowel and heart concerns within the next couple months but it is really hard when I have such strong fear and anxiety associated with the doctor. It's horrible. But I can't bare the anxiety with health any longer. It stops me enjoying life and being happy because in the back of my mind I always feel like I can't be happy because I'm not healthy. Some days I go to bed so horribly anxious I feel like I'll go into a full On panic, and then I'll wake up remembering my fears and feel really depressed.
What can I do to get over my medical fears? And to believe doctors when they say I'm healthy? How do I stop the temptation to google every ailment I think I have? Does anyone else ever feel like this because I just hate it!
Thank you

[thebluerecluse]

I know you probably already know this but none of the symptoms you listed sounds worrying at all. One thing I know has helped many people with HA is CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy. I suggest you start seeing a psychologist if you aren't already.

I think most of us feel like that a lot, I feel that way 24/7 atm. What stops me from googling is knowing that it's only going to make me more anxious. I just keep telling myself that. I know it's hard but just try to go about your life and not think about it, eventually it will start to fade away.

Also, being vegetarian isn't necessarily healthy. Do you eat a lot of processed foods or food with added sugar? I strongly believe in the power our diet has over our mental and physical health. Make sure you are eating and drinking right.

[Libra96]

I know you probably already know this but none of the symptoms you listed sounds worrying at all. One thing I know has helped many people with HA is CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy. I suggest you start seeing a psychologist if you aren't already.

I think most of us feel like that a lot, I feel that way 24/7 atm. What stops me from googling is knowing that it's only going to make me more anxious. I just keep telling myself that. I know it's hard but just try to go about your life and not think about it, eventually it will start to fade away.

Also, being vegetarian isn't necessarily healthy. Do you eat a lot of processed foods or food with added sugar? I strongly believe in the power our diet has over our mental and physical health. Make sure you are eating and drinking right.

Thank you so much for the reply. I do think I could use a psychologist but often to anxious at the thought of going to one!
I get my good and bad moments with health anxiety. Some days I tell myself that actually what I experience isn't alarming, but others I happen to go on google see something and that's how it gets out of control. I'm certainly feeling a lot better when not on google. It's just hard to stay off so I must distract myself until the need to do so wares off.

Actually being a vegetarian makes me feel better about my health. I know it statistically lowers chances of heart disease and some cancers so it brings some comfort. That one time the nurse assumed I was anemic was because I'd been having dizzy spells for a few days at the time but I actually had an infection and this went away. I don't eat a lot of sugar actually and recently I completely cut out any sugar/snack food I did eat. I think just knowing I'm eating and drinking better makes me feel better it's just that nasty google!