Jm1990
16-03-17, 18:03
Hello all. I've just joined this website after a horrendous day.
Where to start? A little bit about me and my anxiety...
Growing up, I was the shy kid! Always seen as cute and innocent but it wasn't until my teenage years that that shyness developed into full blown anxiety. Probably more social anxiety. My teenage years were hell! I locked myself away for a long time, developed agoraphobia and depression and generally had no life at all. That changed around age 19 when I had the opportunity to volunteer abroad which totally changed my life and brought me out of depression and agoraphobia... but the anxiety stayed!
Since then my anxiety has gone up and done like a yo yo in terms of severity. At times it has just been at a "normal" level. And at other times it has been terrifying to the point it has stopped me from having a happy and fulfilling life.
Just turning 27, I now feel like I have a plan and direction in life. I really felt for the first time in my life I was in control of where I was going and felt like I could achieve good things. Of course, the anxiety which for the past year had almost completely vanished, has decided to raise its ugly head once more.
For the past few days I had been feeling that familiar feeling of dread.
It came to a head today, in my place of study during a lunch break. I had a full blown panic attack which was utterly terrifying! Felt like my head was expanding, dizziness, rapid heartbeat, tight chest, feeling faint, head rush! I'm sure you all know the symptoms.
Thankfully I had a good friend with me to support me and my lecturer was also there to support me. He gave me the rest of the day off to just go and try feel better. I feel fine now but I feel like at this age, when I finally thought I had overcome my anxiety, I now need to get help.
I've never sought any help in the past for it. I dunno why really. Possibly being a young guy or being from an environment where these things aren't understood and where the only advice is "man up"! But I value myself more these days and I want to "help myself".
I'm planning to make an appointment with my gp asap. I don't really know what will happen though. I fear medication as I don't want to turn into an emotionless zombie or not feel myself. I wouldn't say no to trying it though if it took the psychical symptoms away or at least a little. I'd also like to talk more with professionals and also with you guys. Just people who understand how this feels and how it affects every decision I make in life,big and small. I'm just so fed up of feeling this way and I want it to change, so here I am making the first step.
Hi :byebye:
Where to start? A little bit about me and my anxiety...
Growing up, I was the shy kid! Always seen as cute and innocent but it wasn't until my teenage years that that shyness developed into full blown anxiety. Probably more social anxiety. My teenage years were hell! I locked myself away for a long time, developed agoraphobia and depression and generally had no life at all. That changed around age 19 when I had the opportunity to volunteer abroad which totally changed my life and brought me out of depression and agoraphobia... but the anxiety stayed!
Since then my anxiety has gone up and done like a yo yo in terms of severity. At times it has just been at a "normal" level. And at other times it has been terrifying to the point it has stopped me from having a happy and fulfilling life.
Just turning 27, I now feel like I have a plan and direction in life. I really felt for the first time in my life I was in control of where I was going and felt like I could achieve good things. Of course, the anxiety which for the past year had almost completely vanished, has decided to raise its ugly head once more.
For the past few days I had been feeling that familiar feeling of dread.
It came to a head today, in my place of study during a lunch break. I had a full blown panic attack which was utterly terrifying! Felt like my head was expanding, dizziness, rapid heartbeat, tight chest, feeling faint, head rush! I'm sure you all know the symptoms.
Thankfully I had a good friend with me to support me and my lecturer was also there to support me. He gave me the rest of the day off to just go and try feel better. I feel fine now but I feel like at this age, when I finally thought I had overcome my anxiety, I now need to get help.
I've never sought any help in the past for it. I dunno why really. Possibly being a young guy or being from an environment where these things aren't understood and where the only advice is "man up"! But I value myself more these days and I want to "help myself".
I'm planning to make an appointment with my gp asap. I don't really know what will happen though. I fear medication as I don't want to turn into an emotionless zombie or not feel myself. I wouldn't say no to trying it though if it took the psychical symptoms away or at least a little. I'd also like to talk more with professionals and also with you guys. Just people who understand how this feels and how it affects every decision I make in life,big and small. I'm just so fed up of feeling this way and I want it to change, so here I am making the first step.
Hi :byebye: