I hate being at home

[BlueEyesShining]

As the title says, I really hate being at home and I feel like I only feel anxious when I am at home and especially in my own room.
I constantly find excuses to be "out and about" and I feel like, except for sleeping, I don`t even need to go home.
I live with my parents and they are really supportive so they are not the problem.
I just feel like being at home suffocates me. I can`t stand being inside the walls.
Why is this happening? I just can`t understand because most of the people enjoy being at home

[ana]

I get the same feeling as you do even though I am, ironically enough, agoraphobic. Since realising that at home is not where the kind of life I want is, I've been feeling more trapped indoors than outdoors. I believe feeling anxious at home is a good sign that change needs to happen, so that you can go out, spend time with people and live an anxiety-free life. :)

[Bill]

I think I can explain why you feel suffocated at home and it links into a couple of things you've both said - the feelings of being trapped and I can't stand being inside the walls.

Often with anxiety our minds become consumed with worries and fears, and these create thoughts that makes us feel stressed so when you feel in an enclosed space, you feel trapped. You feel you need to escape and break free but it's not actually from the space you're in but caused really by the stress you're feeling. This can happen, but not always, anywhere. At work, in a shop, in a crowd etc. Anywhere where you suddenly become aware of feeling enclosed because you're feeling stressed.

For instance, you could leave home, go to the shops and return home again without any problems but then one day you could do exactly the same but you're in the same shop trying to decide between two things which you want to buy. On this occasion though you just can't choose, you can't make your mind up so you start feeling stressed. This makes you feel hot and panicky and because maybe you've experienced a panic attack before, you become anxious to get out of the shop because you feel trapped due to stress and need to escape home again where you think you'll feel safe.

However, because you've run away from the situation, you still remain sensitive to that fear - what if it happens again - so the next time you're in the shop, just the fear of it happening again can make it happen again. The only way to overcome it is to stay in the shop and allow the anxiety to subside naturally so that next time you go out you feel more confident in yourself knowing you have nothing to fear because it won't harm you.

Anyway, a couple of opposite examples - claustrophobia - when someone is in an enclosed space they panic because it causes them fear and not feeling able to escape. In some cases it could be down to stress in their lives but maybe it was caused by a bad experience or a phobia, irrational worries etc that developed for whatever reason. However, the principle is the same. They feel trapped because they feel stressed, and they feel stressed because they feel trapped. It's a vicious cycle keeping their anxiety and its symptoms alive - just as you would feel at home in your room.

I would guess you might then think why do people suffer from agoraphobia when you would have thought they would feel free being in an open space. In this case, it's still down to stress and fear but perhaps for different reasons. For instance, when someone suffers stress in the workplace or in a shop etc, they might suffer a panic attack so they will then probably retreat to their home because it should represent a place of safety but although they might feel fine at home because at home they feel secure, what actually can happen is anxiety moves in with them because they become afraid to go out for fear of experiencing another panic, fear etc that caused them to want to retreat in the first place. Home becomes their cell. They might feel happy but will feel trapped. The panic attack was the bad experience that triggered their anxiety but the panic attack might well have been caused by too much stress going on in their lives which could I would guess possibly cause claustrophobia too.

The end result is the same though. In both cases, living in fear with four walls representing a trap but for different reasons with opposite feelings experienced being indoors or out.

What could then happen though is you become anxious staying at home because of the stress you're feeling causing you to feel trapped but then when you try to escape, again you feel stressed outdoors because you're afraid of experiencing panic being away from what you feel was your secure place of safety.

The end result being you feel constantly anxious wherever you go because you feel you can never escape the stress you're feeling that's making you feel trapped whether indoors or out. You become generally anxious of anything or anywhere that you fear will make you feel stressed.

I know that may all sound doom and gloom but it need not really because the bottom line is there are ways of learning how to keep relaxed no matter what you're thinking or where you are. One tip though is try and practise relaxation techniques to try and combat the thoughts and their feelings of wanting to run so you can stay where you are and learn how to deal with anxious feelings and not to be afraid of them.

Sorry if it sounds confusing.