mrjonesmcr
22-03-17, 16:53
Actually my birthday was just under two months ago, but I've basically been going through a trance since then. Okay, I was before as well, but lately I've been feeling worse than ever, more lonely than I've ever been. Still no friends, voluntary work isn't so fun, I'm still underappreciated and the work is unfulfilling. And I'm at that age now where things need to happen. I've tried everything and I don't think it's unreasonable to want some kind of reward for it, I don't expect the world and more, but something to show for my efforts would be nice, but fate keeps shitting on me.
I did have a glimmer of hope recently in my personal life, I was hoping to get a photography placement at a small company here. Whilst I've been reassured it's mine, it's the whole waiting to start it (long story!), waiting for it to be official, but one thing after another has derailed and delayed it to the point it's got rid of most of the enthusiasm I felt.
I just wish I had something, just one thing I can feel good about, something that could jolt me into action and make me feel like I'm worthy again instead of being that loser just daydreaming through life.
I did have a glimmer of hope recently in my personal life, I was hoping to get a photography placement at a small company here. Whilst I've been reassured it's mine, it's the whole waiting to start it (long story!), waiting for it to be official, but one thing after another has derailed and delayed it to the point it's got rid of most of the enthusiasm I felt.
I just wish I had something, just one thing I can feel good about, something that could jolt me into action and make me feel like I'm worthy again instead of being that loser just daydreaming through life.