View Full Version : Now I'm just getting annoyed
Jackrabbit
28-03-17, 23:40
Rant Mode Activated:
I'm so over this damn health anxiety, I really am, and its getting to the point now where I'm just can't do it anymore. The whole journey is still new to me, I started having general anxiety issues back in October and then it turned into health anxiety. I was constantly fearing a brain tumor or stroke or seizure or whatever.. This is no way to live, constantly in fear, focusing on all of the WRONG things. This is not how you enjoy life.
As far as I am concerned, I AM HEALTHY. And so are many of you. How fortunate we are to be healthy because there are so many right now who are struggling to live their lives. I read a story the other day about a young girl with cancer who dreamed of getting her own apartment and decorating it. Something so simple that many of us on here have done. The only thing I felt for her was sheer sorrow, that she would not be able to do that and I instantly felt thankful. The thing is though, is that we shouldn't have to read a story like that or meet someone who is ill to feel grateful about our health, we just should everyday. I for one, am sick of feeling so anxious all of the time about my health, because at the end of the day, there isn't much I can do other than live a healthy lifestyle. If I or anyone of you get cancer or a brain tumor or whatever else, then you worry about it then, because at that point there is only so much you can do. I'm annoyed that I have wasted so much time worrying instead of living and being happy. Those are several months that I'm not going to get back.
I woke up last night around 3 am in a total panic, for basically no reason. Yeah I was a little stressed the day before but nothing too bad. I woke up shaking unable to catch my breath, tingling, the whole nine yards and this morning I woke up feeling like crap. I felt exhausted, out of it, and my head was heavy. I thought to myself, here goes another anxiety and depression filled day revolving around my health. I'm over it, I can't keep up with it anymore because what will I become if i do? I'm 24 years old and I'm wasting time worrying about stuff that has less than a 1% chance of happening to me. It's dumb.
It's scientifically proven that your outlook on life and your health can heal you, while I've come to realize that anxiety doesn't just disappear overnight, I'm starting to realize that I can control it. Not whether or not I have a panic attack or if something makes me feel anxious but the key is to recognize it and realize that it is mostly in your head. Even the physical symptoms, they come from your mental state of mind. I just can't keep it up anymore.
Anxiety can kiss my ass :shades:
Damn straight! You make some very good points and you should be a bit pissed. I was about your age when I kicked this the first time. Now I am about five months into a relapse and I am with you man. Fed up. So what's the plan?
You need a plan of action. Today I scheduled counseling and got some info on acupuncture (my GP here in Boston said he has had lots of success with his patients with it). Each day I am waking up a bit earlier to do my yoga (get my mind and body right) and each night I am going to bed on time and listening to some mindfulness stuff or old 80s new age tunes as I drift off.
Enough's enough. It's not the official forum motto or anything, but I have heard a couple of people say it already...
"Our recovery begins when we fear not living today more than we fear dying tomorrow." - Skippy (I think that was who it was attributed to)
Good luck!
Jackrabbit
29-03-17, 01:01
Power to ya!
For me I've begun really focusing on my mind and body. Eating healthier, doing my yoga as you mentioned. I also do some in the mornings, I've found a few really good 30 minute sessions on youtube. Straight and to the point. I haven't tried counseling yet but I think that Im gonna give it a go. I have the insurance for it so why not?
Also for me, I'm really focusing on things that make me happy: reading, getting into nature, cooking, going out with my friends more. Even if I feel uncomfortable about it...a friend once told me " you have to be comfortable with being uncomfortable sometimes". And even though he didn't mean it to be some deep moment, it really settled with me because he's absolutely right. You need to cope with the fact that sometimes you're not going to be comfortable or happy or secure. You deal with it.
Also whats really helped me are monthly massages. Like they really do help! It helps release a lot of that tension that causes a lot of the physical symptoms that come with anxiety.
PASchoolSyndrome
29-03-17, 01:13
Good for you!
I've recently have recovered from a general spiral about my health, worried about every single cancer under the sun pretty much. And boy can I tell you, I feel great! I'm eating better, getting out and exercising more, and generally just a happier person. I still see young girls fighting and dying from breast cancer which does give me a slight ache in my chest, (I live in Boston as well so huge medical mecha and I am out in my rotations, doing one at Dana-Farber which I'm slightly worried about my mental health with) but I've been much better at just living my life.
Enough is enough. We're not sick at this moment and life is too short and predictable not to enjoy every moment.
Well the way I see it we have three really fed up HA sufferers ready to commit to a better life dedicated to those that actually have health problems. Let's check in on this thread with the ups and downs and keep each other motivated. What say you?
PASchoolSyndrome
29-03-17, 01:51
I agree! Great idea!
Jackrabbit
29-03-17, 05:00
I am with you guys!
You read my mind! I wrote a post similar to yours a couple days ago. I don't even know what it feels like to live without health anxiety. No idea how it feels to not have morbid and dark thoughts everyday. This is the first time in my life that I am trying to control the anxiety itself and not just the vague symptoms I get of vanishing diseases. Like yourself and many of the others that have responded I am finding solace in reading personal development blogs, exercise and healthy eating. Here is to hoping we can all get through this together. Perhaps we should start sharing our journey and inspiring each other
Welcome aboard Katniss! The SS Screw Health Anxiety has plenty of room for more unruly paaengers.
Sitting in a L-Shape trying to work on my computer when one finger on my right hand starts twitching. About a half hour later I have a shudder. Ten minutes later a leg jerk. This is the kind of stuff that drives me nuts. I am having trouble concentrating, but that should be expected. After all I am analyzing every damn sensation and movement to death.
Not gonna let this take over my day. Hope you guys are doing well.
Jackrabbit
29-03-17, 15:39
Don't let it control you Pablo. Focus on other things and whats good around you. This morning I woke up and felt pretty alright. I've told myself that enough is enough and overtime an anxiety symptom starts to creep up on me I basically tell it to politely f*ck off lol!
Remember to not let it control you. You're better than that and your life deserves a lot better.
Emmaisworried
29-03-17, 16:26
I really want to stop this anxiety I have about my health.
I am preoccupied with it all the time at the moment. All day every day.
I am young - 35 - with two amazing children and I don't want this to dominate my life.
I am so so fed up with it. I live in fear of being ill and of my children being ill.
It's been happening for a while but has been worse over the past month.
Has anyone tried medication for it? I would rather not but a friend has suggested it might help and I wondered what others have experienced?
Thanks Jackrabbit! It's been a few hours and it is getting better. I don't have time for this sh*t. :)
---------- Post added at 11:37 ---------- Previous post was at 11:30 ----------
I really want to stop this anxiety I have about my health.
I am preoccupied with it all the time at the moment. All day every day.
I am young - 35 - with two amazing children and I don't want this to dominate my life.
I am so so fed up with it. I live in fear of being ill and of my children being ill.
It's been happening for a while but has been worse over the past month.
Has anyone tried medication for it? I would rather not but a friend has suggested it might help and I wondered what others have experienced?
Hi Emma, I have two kids as well and becoming a parent brought my anxiety out of hibernation. Try focusing on worrying about not living today with them, more than you fear dying tomorrow. Bad things will happen someday, but worrying about them only destroys the time we have. Also everything you are going through will help you help them when they have similar concerns. It isn't pointless. Having kids just messes with you.
As for meds, my GP said I should try acupuncture first. The guy is renowned and well-respected in Boston medical circles, so this isn't some hippy at an alternative clinic talking. He said for anxiety he has noted that wellness exercises, cognitive behavioral therapy, and acupuncture have had far better success rates with his patients than meds. That said, you should talk to your medical professionals for their opinion. Hang in there and feel free to keep us posted on this thread. We have plenty of room :)
What's interesting is that like anything else, it comes down to making a decision that you're not going to take it anymore and do something about it.
It's like the dog sitting on the nail story I posted. When the pain becomes great enough, you move!
A man goes to his friend's house and when he gets there, he notices the friend's dog is sitting hunched in the corner whimpering. He asks his friend what's wrong with the dog and his friend answers "He's sitting on a nail". "Why doesn't he just move?" the man asks. His friend answers "Because it doesn't hurt enough yet".
Positive thoughts
desertraven
29-03-17, 18:06
Hi there! I recently joined this forum due to my recent spiral back into health anxiety after a really good several year run of minimal anxiety.
My recent fears have been: pulmonary embolism, heart attack, and most recently lymphoma. I have had an EKG, chest x-ray, blood drawn and all has been normal. My vitals have been normal with the exception of high heart rate at times. My heart races periodically and I was told "yup, anxiety can do that". Sigh. I wish it was that easy to convince my brain of this. I have lost 6 pounds in the last 2 weeks.
Some steps I am taking to get out of this rabbit hole:
-Saw my GP and am starting on a low dose of prozac (10mg).
-Called a psychotherapist to schedule therapy.
-Dropped a day from my job (I was trying to juggle working and going to full-time nursing school and clinical rotations on the weekends).
-Going to try and fit in one yoga class a week to help with breathing and relaxation
I am trying!!! That's all that matters, right? I can't let this constant anxiety ruin my life anymore. My son and husband are worried about me and see how I am spiraling out of control.
What's interesting is that like anything else, it comes down to making a decision that you're not going to take it anymore and do something about it.
It's like the dog sitting on the nail story I posted. When the pain becomes great enough, you move!
A man goes to his friend's house and when he gets there, he notices the friend's dog is sitting hunched in the corner whimpering. He asks his friend what's wrong with the dog and his friend answers "He's sitting on a nail". "Why doesn't he just move?" the man asks. His friend answers "Because it doesn't hurt enough yet".
Positive thoughts
That's a great way of putting it.
---------- Post added at 13:16 ---------- Previous post was at 13:14 ----------
Hi there! I recently joined this forum due to my recent spiral back into health anxiety after a really good several year run of minimal anxiety.
My recent fears have been: pulmonary embolism, heart attack, and most recently lymphoma. I have had an EKG, chest x-ray, blood drawn and all has been normal. My vitals have been normal with the exception of high heart rate at times. My heart races periodically and I was told "yup, anxiety can do that". Sigh. I wish it was that easy to convince my brain of this. I have lost 6 pounds in the last 2 weeks.
Some steps I am taking to get out of this rabbit hole:
-Saw my GP and am starting on a low dose of prozac (10mg).
-Called a psychotherapist to schedule therapy.
-Dropped a day from my job (I was trying to juggle working and going to full-time nursing school and clinical rotations on the weekends).
-Going to try and fit in one yoga class a week to help with breathing and relaxation
I am trying!!! That's all that matters, right? I can't let this constant anxiety ruin my life anymore. My son and husband are worried about me and see how I am spiraling out of control.
Sounds like your on the right path! All we can do is accept the status quo or try to change it. I like the positive changes you are making. Hang in there!
Emmaisworried
29-03-17, 18:29
Thank you so much for your reply.
Meds would be a last resort for me. I absolutely do not judge other people who take them - I know it's something I may need to consider at some point but my preference would be to try other things first. I am in the U.K. And saw my GP about it in November - as a consequence I have seen a community mental health nurse a few times who used CBT - although I do feel like she just chats to me then sends me away with worksheets! 8 don't really look at them which is probably not helping. I suppose I was looking for more from
Her but maybe that's unrealistic for me.
The physical panic has eased in the sense that I don't get so many instances where I am in a panic - rapid heartbeat sweating dizzy etc. Breathing really helps me with that. But he constant thoughts in my mind don't stop even when I can breath through the physical symptoms. Does that make sense?
The past month has been particularly bad - my oldest who is 6 had a brain haemorrhage two years ago and also has severe allergies - both of these things were triggers thothat that the haemorrhage was he biggest trigger to be honest. My GP referred to it as post traumatic anxiety though it comes out as health anxiety if that makes sense.
I might give acupuncture a go - in fact I 100% will. Going to go online this evening when the girls are in bed and take a look at local people who do it. Doubt it will be available via the NHS.
Over the last month I have worried about every health condition possible. It differs Day to day. Today it's a pain I sometimes get below my ribs in the centre of my body above my tummy - i first noticed a while back that comes back now and again when I bend down. Wen I pay attention to my posture it goes away for long periods - but I noticed it last week and today im stressing about it.
Tomorrow who knows. I have a good job, a wonderful family. I just want to stop being like this.
Keep fighting Emma. Rome wasn't built in a day. Everything you are saying makes sense to me. Sounds like the traumatic event with your child may have set this off. You can do this! Stick with it. Even just taking it on will make you feel better.
Emmaisworried
29-03-17, 18:45
I need to take it on. For all of our sakes. The MH nurse suggesting discharging me and I know is because why she sees is someone who does cope - I have a responsible
And stressful job, a busy life, good friends and a busy social life. She sees someone coping. But what she doesn't see is that I do all of these things, yes, but all
I do is worry while I do them!!
Sorry for typos by the way - I'm on my iPhone and it's hard to see the text box!
---------- Post added at 18:45 ---------- Previous post was at 18:44 ----------
Thank you for replying. It really helps to speak to people who know how I feel.
No problem. My wife is amazing but she cannot relate to this and that is okay. Sometimes we need to reach out to those that have experience. Keep in touch through this thread. We're all gonna get through this.
Emmaisworried
29-03-17, 19:04
Thanks - my lovely husband also doesn't understand. He thinks I can just forget about it and carry on...I wish! If only it was so easy. Until being in this situation I didn't fully understand
---------- Post added at 19:04 ---------- Previous post was at 18:53 ----------
Same - my husband can't understand it either. But then neither could I before I experienced it - I never thought for a minute it would happen to me. It makes me feel so weak. Which I know is ridiculous!!
desertraven
29-03-17, 19:17
Thanks - my lovely husband also doesn't understand. He thinks I can just forget about it and carry on...I wish! If only it was so easy. Until being in this situation I didn't fully understand
---------- Post added at 19:04 ---------- Previous post was at 18:53 ----------
Same - my husband can't understand it either. But then neither could I before I experienced it - I never thought for a minute it would happen to me. It makes me feel so weak. Which I know is ridiculous!!
Same story here! My husband has rarely ever been anxious in the 18 years I've known him. Falls asleep in 5 minutes like not a care in the world. He is definitely sympathetic about my HA but doesn't truly get it.
Emmaisworried
29-03-17, 19:34
Can anyone recommend ways to distract - ways to take you out of the negative cycle of thoughts?
desertraven
29-03-17, 19:37
Can anyone recommend ways to distract - ways to take you out of the negative cycle of thoughts?
I have found a few things that decrease my anxiety a bit:
Music
Being outside
Going to the store (sometimes this can increase my anxiety but other times it helps to distract me)
Holding my dog
Hanging out with my 11 year old son
Watering plants/trees in our yard
Can anyone recommend ways to distract - ways to take you out of the negative cycle of thoughts?
What normally distract you? That would be my first recommendation. But sometimes you really need to just stop and gather yourself and say, "I don't have time for this right now." Music is good for me. I have two albums that can really calm me down. Good luck.
Emmaisworried
29-03-17, 20:05
That's the thing - I can be doing things, keeping busy but still worry!
I think stopping and recognising it and telling myself to stop might be worth trying.
I have a suggestion. This is not so much a distraction, instead it's a way for you to get your life back. Prioritize and get sight of what's really important. I know this idea may not work for everyone but it is currently working for me.
Organize your life and set goals. I recently picked up a beautiful planner from Indigo and have been making to do lists as well as setting some personal goals for myself. For ie. One of my goals is to finally start on my cooking blog and start exercising three times a day. I also have tonnes of thing's to do while being a stay at home mom so this allows me to make daily to do lists and weekly lists. At the end of the day I literally have zero time to think about illnesses. Mind you it's only been two days. But I have seen a huge improvement. This particular planner also allows you to fill in days from 6am to 9pm. So I have filled it with lots of tasks and have slotted some time in for personal development :) Hope this helps some of you. I know it may not be for everyone. Just thought I'd share
Emmaisworried
30-03-17, 08:14
I have a suggestion. This is not so much a distraction, instead it's a way for you to get your life back. Prioritize and get sight of what's really important. I know this idea may not work for everyone but it is currently working for me.
Organize your life and set goals. I recently picked up a beautiful planner from Indigo and have been making to do lists as well as setting some personal goals for myself. For ie. One of my goals is to finally start on my cooking blog and start exercising three times a day. I also have tonnes of thing's to do while being a stay at home mom so this allows me to make daily to do lists and weekly lists. At the end of the day I literally have zero time to think about illnesses. Mind you it's only been two days. But I have seen a huge improvement. This particular planner also allows you to fill in days from 6am to 9pm. So I have filled it with lots of tasks and have slotted some time in for personal development :) Hope this helps some of you. I know it may not be for everyone. Just thought I'd share
I think this is a really good idea. I've found myself acting like an ill person to some extent over the last month. Longer acrually though it's been more subtle. I was going to the gym 3/4 x per week last year and then in Ctover we had news that a close family member was ill. I didn't react well to this (inside - no one knows about my anxiety on the outside!) and stopped going to the gym. That, for me, was the first step to letting anxiety about my health consume me. I just couldn't make myself go anymore and pretty much haven't since.
Over the last month when things have been particularly bad, I've found myself not wanting to do as much around the house. Rather than do housework I've sat and watched greys anatomy! No one else has noticed as my house is pretty clean anyway. But I have noticed. At the weekend I got up and did lots and actually I FELT BETTER!!
I've been really achy since last week and I'm wondering actually if it's becatse I'm sitting all evening in bed watching tv once the kids go to bed. Certainly my anxiety hasn't been helping as I think I am so tense that it affects my muscles.
---------- Post added at 08:13 ---------- Previous post was at 08:13 ----------
Sorry for typos! On bus on way to work and can't see the box as clearly!
---------- Post added at 08:14 ---------- Previous post was at 08:13 ----------
Sorry for typos! On bus on way to work and can't see the box as clearly!
Emmaisworried, I totally agree. The problem with a lot of HA and most anxiety sufferers is they go about their daily business with a smile on their face and look like they are fully functioning. What people can't see is their struggles on the inside. It's a shame that your mental health nurse doesn't recognise that. Being a nurse myself, I thought she would be one of the most prominent people to recognise this! Maybe it's her own work constraints but that's such a pity. Stay positive xx
Emmaisworried
30-03-17, 08:35
I think she does recognise it. But I also think she thinks a lot of my feelings are normal given the trauma we went through, and therefore that over time they will get better. She is probably right but I don't want to stop seeing her. Although I'm not sure how effective the sessions are. I thought there would be more to CBT?
Today I am worrying about a different health condition but I am going to try and tel myself that life is for living and I cannot let this fear dominate me.
If the symptoms consistently change but the response doesn't you can bet that your anxiety is the culprit. Know that you cannot fix this overnight but that forward progress begins when you're fed up and committed to change. Put your foot down. Find your empowerment and bring it into action. You can do it Emma!
D Ray Morton
30-03-17, 14:36
Lets beat it !!
Lets beat it !!
Sounds good to me.
Jackrabbit? PASchoolSyndrome?
You guys hanging in there?
MyNameIsTerry
30-03-17, 22:55
If the symptoms consistently change but the response doesn't you can bet that your anxiety is the culprit. Know that you cannot fix this overnight but that forward progress begins when you're fed up and committed to change. Put your foot down. Find your empowerment and bring it into action. You can do it Emma!
I used to go to weekly walk-in meets ran by a mental health charity and one of their steps to recovery was to empower yourself.
It does help. I guess feeling back in control overrides the fear. An example of how the power of the mind can change our perceptions of our situations.
Jackrabbit
31-03-17, 00:31
Hey all,
Emma I know how you feel about the anxiety when it comes to parenthood. I also have a young son. That I think, is what really triggered my anxiety along with other stressors in life. I too have feared about not being there for my son, but I think thats pretty normal. The key is just to NOT obsess over it! Don't let it get to you and channel that into being a great parent.
---------- Post added at 23:28 ---------- Previous post was at 23:27 ----------
If the symptoms consistently change but the response doesn't you can bet that your anxiety is the culprit. Know that you cannot fix this overnight but that forward progress begins when you're fed up and committed to change. Put your foot down. Find your empowerment and bring it into action. You can do it Emma!
Thats sooooo true! I used to get a new symptom and think "oh God this is really it" but it went away almost as fast as it came. Mind tricks I tell ya!
---------- Post added at 23:31 ---------- Previous post was at 23:28 ----------
To everyone replying, I'm really glad that this has brought so many together to talk about what we can do to get out of it. Since writing this post I've actually felt a great deal better. I still have those sinister thoughts but I'm coping with them. I don't let it control me. I acknowledge them, tell them to move aside and continue on with my day. I know how all of you feel. You've all mentioned things that I have personally experienced. Focus on being OK not perfect or wonderful or fantastic but OK. And once you get there just keep moving forward. Its not a race to the finish line and it healing is something that takes time. Don't feel guilty.
Excellent Jackrabbit! Don't be a stranger. Keep us updated now and then.
Jackrabbit
31-03-17, 01:17
Really just think about how much time you are wasting when you worry about stuff life that and when you let it take over. Its ok to feel it, just don't let it control you.
I know thats easier said than done but one thing I do....and this is gonna sound crazy. But I talk to my anxiety and basically tell it to screw off. My frustration cancels out the actual anxiety and somewhat balances me out
---------- Post added at 00:17 ---------- Previous post was at 00:13 ----------
Things that help me:
Reading
Resting when I can
Cooking
Going for walks
Having a nightly glass of wine
"Talking to my anxiety"- telling it to fxck off
listening to music and dancing
lavender oil behind my ears (I know weird)
talking it out to people
Coming on here to chat and post
I'm joining the club. My anxiety has been so good for over a year, but it's been slyly creeping back up on me in the last few months. Today, for example, I was in the shower and while washing my hair felt that a spot on the bone behind my left ear was tender to the touch. I have a cold and terrible allergies, so the non-anxious person would assume this is from sinus pressure and move on. But, I got caught up in it, googled, and then panicked I had an infection in the bone. I hate when I do this because then I get short with my 3 year old, whose 3 year old-ness becomes unbearable when I'm in panic mode.
As we went about our day I obsessed over whether I should go to the doctor to be checked for an ear infection or not. Ultimately, I was able to calm myself and enjoy most of the day, but I lost several hours to panic and then the exhaustion that follows. This is such bullshit. The whole time I knew nothing was wrong. I knew that if I did have an ear infection it would get worse, I'd know, and then I'd call the doctor. I knew that I'd had similar pain in the past once or twice and it went away on its own. I knew that if I'd just gotten the flonase like my doctor recommended at my annual check up, my sinuses would have been clearer and it wouldn't have even happened. But I was afraid to use it. **** this shit, you guys. Most of my days are good lately, but ones like this are becoming more frequent, and I'm not going to let it back in!! I made a therapy appointment for a few weeks from now to check in and get things under control.
I'm so glad that we were able to create a thread to work on the root of our anxiety instead of just brush it off and make each other feel better only to have another mystery "illness" pop up. Here is to hoping that every single one of us finds a way to happiness and rids themselves of this horrid anxiety
Yep. Cannot sit around and count/study muscle twitches my whole life. Before that it was lightheadedness, and before that it was my swollen knee. It all started because of that damn knee swelling on transatlantic flights. Was sure I would get DVT. Now I am looking for signs of a degenerative neurological condition. I have always been a bit health anxious but it spiraled out of control this time. Time to get my head on straight and move on.
Jackrabbit
01-04-17, 01:19
Yeah I definitely think that the root of my anxiety comes from sheer stress. Ive been really focusing on trying to minimalize it as much as possible but things happen you know.
Also, it is Spring season here and allergies are just completely out of hand and I know that that can trigger health anxiety. Headaches, achiness, facial soreness and all that are normal for allergies so dont let it make you paranoid.
ErinKC, I'm glad that you are standing strong...dont let it back in! You are totally stronger than that. Trust in your docs. Make often appointments when you can for reassurance, that has helped me feel better as well as some sort of therapy. It feels good to talk it out.
---------- Post added at 00:19 ---------- Previous post was at 00:16 ----------
Pablo I get what you mean about the symptoms. For me one that always bugs me out is a lightheaded dizzy feeling that I get from time to time. Sometimes I feel out of it as well, like the world around me isnt real. Its really concerning sometimes and does help fuel the anxiety. But when I really focus on it, I realize that I'm feeling pretty normal, just interpreting my feelings differently. Like I used to get this ridiculous tremble but when I focused on it I realized that it was me who was tensing up and not breathing properly which is what was causing it. And of course that came from stress and anxiety. Anxiety looks for things to get fuel from, so you could totally respond to a normal bodily reaction in an anxious way and your mind basically capitalizes on it. 100% mind tricks! It sucks.
motox&mascara
01-04-17, 10:40
I've just quickly scrolled through this post while getting ready to crash out for the night so quickly commenting so I can bookmark to come back to tomorrow and join in the convo :D
(Hope that doesn't sound snobby lol) must go to sleep - am off riding tomorrow so need all the sleep I can get haha - that damn anxiety ain't coming along for the ride!!
have had hellish HA today (due to thinking it was a great idea to drink to much wine) so I need this thread in my life! Sooo over having health anxiety every damn day I want, no, NEED, to kick its ass once and for all!!
Hope everyone is doing well. It's a hell of a thing to deal with but is great having somewhere where we can all come together and relate. My partner can't stand me going on about my "illnesses" all the time and no one really understands unless they have been through it.
Take care tribe!
[/COLOR]Pablo I get what you mean about the symptoms. For me one that always bugs me out is a lightheaded dizzy feeling that I get from time to time. Sometimes I feel out of it as well, like the world around me isnt real. Its really concerning sometimes and does help fuel the anxiety. But when I really focus on it, I realize that I'm feeling pretty normal, just interpreting my feelings differently. Like I used to get this ridiculous tremble but when I focused on it I realized that it was me who was tensing up and not breathing properly which is what was causing it. And of course that came from stress and anxiety. Anxiety looks for things to get fuel from, so you could totally respond to a normal bodily reaction in an anxious way and your mind basically capitalizes on it. 100% mind tricks! It sucks.
That is 100% how my lightheadedness feels. When I try to explain it to Drs they don't get it. I think that's because it is disassociation disorder brought on by anxiety and not physical lightheadedness. Last night I had a wicked PVC (which I get from time to time) and it brought on real lightheadedness. While I hate that feeling and PVCs freak me out, it was easy to see that the other symptoms were different. Of course pvcs can be caused by or exacerbated by anxiety, so I am obviously not home free yet, but I'm getting there.
Jackrabbit
01-04-17, 16:45
Sucks to hear that Pablo. I'm staying at my sisters for a few weeks and actually had a pretty decent nights sleep last night for being in a new place (I love my own bed) but her kids woke me up pretty early this morning. When I tried to go back to sleep though I couldn't because I felt like something was just off in my head. Like every time I closed my eyes I kept seeing flashing lights and I felt like I was just drifting off to a place that I didn't want to go to. It sucked because I was still pretty tired and now I just feel exhausted and really on edge. Ever experience something similar?
---------- Post added at 15:45 ---------- Previous post was at 15:43 ----------
I've just quickly scrolled through this post while getting ready to crash out for the night so quickly commenting so I can bookmark to come back to tomorrow and join in the convo :D
(Hope that doesn't sound snobby lol) must go to sleep - am off riding tomorrow so need all the sleep I can get haha - that damn anxiety ain't coming along for the ride!!
have had hellish HA today (due to thinking it was a great idea to drink to much wine) so I need this thread in my life! Sooo over having health anxiety every damn day I want, no, NEED, to kick its ass once and for all!!
Hope everyone is doing well. It's a hell of a thing to deal with but is great having somewhere where we can all come together and relate. My partner can't stand me going on about my "illnesses" all the time and no one really understands unless they have been through it.
Take care tribe!
Yeah I agree, it is really hard to explain it to people who have never been through it. I try talking to my parents and family about it but they keep trying to assure me that its normal..which its NOT. I've even had people try and tell me that its not a big deal and to just handle it which I think were all doing the best we can. It sucks because it really can totally take over your life but you can't let it get that one up. There will be bad days, I think I might have one today but I think given everything happening in our brains its only expected to.
Sucks to hear that Pablo. I'm staying at my sisters for a few weeks and actually had a pretty decent nights sleep last night for being in a new place (I love my own bed) but her kids woke me up pretty early this morning. When I tried to go back to sleep though I couldn't because I felt like something was just off in my head. Like every time I closed my eyes I kept seeing flashing lights and I felt like I was just drifting off to a place that I didn't want to go to. It sucked because I was still pretty tired and now I just feel exhausted and really on edge. Ever experience something similar?[COLOR="blue"]
Not flashing lights, but minor twitches and disturbances when I close my eyes. But I totally get the "not your bed" issue, as I am currently staying in Boston and haven't been in "my" bed since December. I have a room here, but it's pretty sparse and has nothing in it to make it feel like its mine.
That it happens when you are drifting off suggests it is anxiety and arising from the fact that you don't feel at home, per se. Seems totally normal to me.
My anxiety is really messing with me lately! It's trying to latch on to ANYTHING it can to take me down! I'll feel fine for days and then suddenly something so unexpected gets me! Today I was minding my own business, cleaning the house when I decided to clean out the fridge. I found in there a bowl with left overs that was VERY long forgotten... I cannot remember when we ate it... I decided to clear it out. Since it was in my grandmother's bowl I didn't want to trash it, so I dumped it into a bag, then another bag, and still a third, and put the bowl in the sink and filled it with water. Then, since I was boiling water for coffee, I dumped the boiled water into the bowl. After washing it out twice it still smelled so I realized I'd have to trash it. Then suddenly the panic attack showed up. Everywhere I looked was bacteria and toxins from the old food. I imagined that it had splashed into my counters, the clean dishes on the dish rack, etc... and I just freaked out.
I managed to get myself together and I cleaned out the sink and did all the dishes. I wiped down all the surfaces and finished cleaning out the fridge.
I calmed myself down and my husband and daughter came home. Now, sitting peacefully I suddenly panicked that botulism could have grown in there and now it was everywhere in my house. We ate lunch when my family got home, so now they'd be contaminated.
I cannot get a break!!!!
Jackrabbit
01-04-17, 19:43
Erin that really sounds like OCD to me, which can be closely linked with anxiety and panic. What youre describing sounds really rare, like there probably a less than 1% chance of that happening to your home. I mean unless you directly ingested it when it was old like that you prob wont suffer any symptoms. If you cleaned your house like you said you did then youve done everything that you can and its best to focus on something else.
I've mentioned before that a lot of this is easier said than done but one thing with anxiety is that its important not to focus on it because it will become worse if you do. If youve done everything that you can to help the situation then find comfort in that and look to the future. Of course we'll all have bad days but itll pass. Just keep holding on to that.
Erin that really sounds like OCD to me, which can be closely linked with anxiety and panic.
I'm starting to think I've developed OCD. I never, ever had any OCD tendencies in the past, but suddenly in the last few months it seems like my health anxiety is morphing into an OCD/phobia of toxins and contamination rather than an anxiety about diseases like it once was.
I am just so frustrated with this because it came out of nowhere. I'm doing so wonderfully in the rest of my life right now and hadn't had anxiety at all in such a long time, and now this is just bubbling up for some reason.
Thankfully, I have my therapy appointment in the next few weeks so I can bring this up. I'm so tired of it!
I have my first therapy appointment in a few days as well. Coming at this guns blazing. Good luck Erin!
Jackrabbit
03-04-17, 00:45
Since this one is getting pretty long, I'm going to start a new thread about kicking anxiety's ass :) Feel free to check in and keep us up to date about how you're getting through it
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.