help me please

[GUMBALL]

:unsure:
hi everyone, I'm new too this forum.
I understand the general use for this website, I am here to look for some help.
I am in a relationship with my partner , we are coming up on a few years together.
Ill give you the basics, my partner suffers from Anxiety, depression, mood swings also she suffers intrusive thoughts on a regular basis. I also think she has OCD and she is often irrational,
She blames a lot of her mental illness on me and our rows when we cannot see eye to eye are getting out of hand. She does however, recognise that she can be irrational and takes her fair share of the blame.
the one thing we keep tripping up over is , she thinks I don't understand her and she has told me she thinks I am a basic thinker and she thinks I see everything black and white and that I don't get her.
I try really hard, we have come so close to breaking up, because I have said something that she has found offensive and over thinks these things.
she has a few triggers and sometimes unwittingly I have accidently triggered her anxiety. The last argument was regarding our sexual relationship, she will not discuss sex with me at all, and I'm struggling because I am a very sexual person and of course I want her to know what I'm thinking , she has made it very clear she doesn't want to talk about it.
recently , another thing we discussed, is a few girls that she has been friends with , who have flirted with her and ones she has certain feelings for. She will openly share these details with me and its causing a gap in our relationships.
she also always refers to her ex cassie and sometimes I think she compares me to her.
I just need help, should I try and encourage her to talk to me about our sex life? should I encourage her to openly talk about other women she flirts with? should I encourage her to talk about cassie?
any help would be appreciated
:winks::winks:

---------- Post added at 18:35 ---------- Previous post was at 16:09 ----------

is no one going to help me ? :unsure:

[Fishmanpa]

Gumball,

Relationship issues and the dynamics of anxiety/mental illness in them are as individual to the person experiencing them as fingerprints.

That being said. I'll give you my impression. I don't know how old you are but for me, as I grew older, the types of behaviors you describe were big red flags to me. The general lack of communication, the deflection of blame, lack of physical intimacy, referring to an ex etc. were... frankly, not worth sticking around for.

Besides all that, the drama alone was enough to discontinue the relationship. If I need drama, I can watch TV ;)

If it were me, I'd be out of there. Life's too short to be with someone who cannot be "with" you through thick and thin willingly and 100%. I can tell you from personal experience, when you find that person as I did with my wife, nothing is too hard or too much to handle even when life throws unexpected curve balls.

Good luck and as always...

Positive thoughts