Physical symptoms after grief

[Elizabeth Fry]

Has anyone had lots of health anxiety after bereavement? I am checking everything! I have palpitations, IBS that's worse, then gastritis, went for a mammogram screening was so worried, but that was ok, thank goodness but what I put myself through in the lead up to the letter was awful. Now I'm checking the back of my throat where my tonsillectomy scars are - one looks redder than the other. What can I do? I have an understanding GP but it's now embarrassing to go to her I've been so many times. Has anyone been given medication which actually helps?

Thanks, in anticipation.x

[Magic]

Yes that is true EF. I have tried many medications for the same thing. Two years.
I have been given amitriptyline two months ago starting with 10mg. I can take 20mg if needed. They are to help pain also. I still have off days though. I also have a few diazepam 5mg now and again. Hope you will be able to settle your mind down though. It is very difficult :hugs:

[Chris 614]

After my dad died three years ago my health anxiety went into overdrive. And, unfortunately, I'm still dealing with it. One therapist told me that anxiety with no purpose looks for something to latch onto. Well, we sure give it a purpose with health issues. So, yes, what you're describing sounds very normal. Not fun though.

I'm not as bad as I was three years ago. However, I find that there is no middle ground for me right now. For example, I caught a cold last week...a simple cold. In the past this would not have alarmed me...but for the past five days I have been hyper focused on all of the things that it could turn into and have been certain this cold is something sinister. And it's not even a crazy bad cold! It's just a cold! Ugh.

As for medication...I am medicine phobic, so I'm not very willing to try things. I've been on Paxil for many years, and it really hasn't helped much during this time. My doctor gave me a prescription for three valium pills. That's all I wanted. I break off little pieces if things get too overwhelming. I've only done that a few times. It does help stop my crazy brain. Imagine how helpful it would be if I took a normal dose! Many, many years ago I took a daily dose of Klonopin for panic attacks and agoraphobia and it gave me my life back. I'm not on that anymore.

I feel for you. I know how difficult this can be. And I know how difficult grief can be. Have you tried counseling at all?

[Cakelady]

Hi, my h/a increased massively after my dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer & has got worse since he died. We are now looking at medications & I am finally getting support, hoping to start cbt soon, best wishes xx

[Chris 614]

Cakelady, my dad had the same thing. I was with him through all of the treatments, etc.. He then died suddenly and unexpectedly right in front of me. It shakes you to the core. I'm glad you are getting support.

[Cakelady]

Chris sorry to hear that. Aw it is awful, so sad. Dont want to say too much about his pc incase it triggers anyones anxiety but my dad was on a "chemo holiday" despite being stage 4 was doing well considering but then he got an infection & was gone:'( Hope you are getting support too , its hard to deal with xx

[Elizabeth Fry]

Hi Everyone, thanks so much to you all for replying.

To know that others find it hard too is helpful. It is so difficult to deal with isn't it? I have started bereavement counselling which I hope will help. The GP gave me Sertraline but I only took 1 and felt so ill I couldn't take any more- too scared. She gave me Propranolol which I take occasionally. I just feel when you start with HA it's hard to stop it or control it. I seem normal to everyone else, but inside and when I'm alone I am a mess. I am heartbroken and at the same time scared about all these symptoms. I try not to focus on myself and meditate using YouTube stuff but I don't think it has helped me much.

It's so good to know that I'm not alone. Thank you.

Xx

[Carnation]

Yes, my anxiety came back with a vengence after my mum died 3 weeks ago.
Lots of physical symptoms have reared their ugly head again.
I find meditation, relaxation and gentle exercise helps a bit.

[Elizabeth Fry]

Hi Carnation,

I don't do any exercise really so perhaps I'll give it a try. At the moment I feel so low I'm turning invitations down too but I realise with time it will get better.

Could I ask when you get symptoms do you go to the doctors or do you just sit it out?

[Carnation]

I tend to sit it out. I'm really bad for not going to the Docs.
Mainly because it causes me anxiety to go and my bp goes sky high.

Maybe try dome gentle yoga/relaxation which you can follow from an App on the internet. I find gardening the best exercise for me and it also helps with grounding yourself with the anxiety. Or maybe just a gentle walk.

---------- Post added at 22:36 ---------- Previous post was at 22:34 ----------

Obviously I meant to say 'some' and not 'dome'. :doh:

[Elizabeth Fry]

Thank you for your sensible advice. I was going to go to the GP tomorrow about my throat but let's see if I can stick it out a bit longer! I'll think about the gardening and the meditation too.xxx

[Carnation]

There's nothing wrong with going to have a GP check on your scars in your throat, it may be the reassurance you need and your GP will understand that.
Because of anxiety, it will forever in the back of your mind.
The times I have had a torch looking at my throat, I've probably caused more problems by sticking alight down it all the time, but hey, that's what people do that have health anxiety. We prod and poke, obsess and think the worst.

[Elizabeth Fry]

I went to the GP she said I've got more tonsillar tissue in one side than the other. Nothing to be worried about. So that was yesterday - today it's a mark on my tongue and twitching eye lid. It just never stops. Just wanted to add - the torch thing - done that so many times. Checking, checking...whatever it is.

I'm glad I have this forum as you understand what I'm going through. My mind has a life of its own.x

[Carnation]

That's good Elizabeth Fry. ~That the GP said everything looked ok.
Health Anxiety is just the worst and just feeds the anxiety more.
We know it, but just can seem to rationalise it.
I particularly obsess about the mouth area.
I have convinced myself that my tongue is twice the width of a normal tongue.
I actually ask to look at other people's tongues. :D
The twitching eye-lid is a very common symptom of anxiety and particularly comes along when we are stressed or very tired. It's so annoying as well, but absolutely harmless.
Like you say, out minds have a life of their own. x

[Anxious_Introvert]

Yep. My brother died in august and ever since I've convinced myself something is wrong with me. I've had so many new physical sypmtons. I didn't have any symptoms or worries until that.

[Elizabeth Fry]

It's so so hard h/a. At the moment I am worried about flaking toenails - is it a sign of something serious?, a lighter patch inside my lip, palpitations, itchy spots, ibs, even though I had a colonoscopy in October, stomach pains - enough! It just goes on. I am listening to all sorts of meditation tapes, praying. I am at my wits end. Life shouldn't be like this - I can't seem to turn the switch the thoughts off.

[Carnation]

I'm still suffering too Elizabeth. :hugs:

Try to throw yourself in to some projects and hobbies. x

[Elizabeth Fry]

Oh thanks so much for replying - I don't feel so alone now. I haven't spoken to anyone today and the thoughts just never stop.
I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling too. Thinking of you.x

[Carnation]

I know exactly what you mean.
Anxiety is a curse, but when you have suffered a bereavement, you are more aware of mortality! Every spot, mark, ache and pain set the alarm bells off.
It is actually in a strange way a protection to check everything.
Because we are sensitive to the point of being obsessive, we drive ourselves mad with possibilities of illness.
I can't tell you how many times I check the inside of my mouth and look over my feet.
But what I can say is that it can diminish in time and if you get as much normality in to your life, it does help. Even taking on something new to divert your brain.
I've had two major bereavements in the last 3 years and the most recent was about 6 weeks ago, (my mum) and I am suffering in a similar way to the last loss, (my dad).
Just try to be kind to yourself and be proud of coping through the day and make plans to try and do more things. Even if you don't feel like it or think you can not handle it, you will be surprised when you do and feel better for it in the long run.
And maybe cut down on the checking, even if it is only by 10%, then maybe 20% and replace it with having a cup of tea and cake or reading a magazine.
You are not alone. x

[Elizabeth Fry]

Thank you so much for your kind words Carnation. I will really try do as you say. I think a key point you make is being kind to ourselves - the constant checking is so debilitating and tiring.

I am very lucky to have such a supportive GP too who has said that my current stomach symptoms!!! are gastritis which I've had before. She's increased my meds and has reassured me that all is ok and that it will all get better. Can I stop my brain? ..... Actually for the first time in a while I read a book over the weekend. It did help. I also didn't sleep at all one night but the next had nearly 8 hours - right through. It was amazing.

I have to believe that I can make some sort of recovery from this.xx