Yoga*Lover
08-04-17, 19:27
Hi guys! Apologies in advance for the long post.
I can't cope with this anymore. I've had a complete meltdown. I am in a constant state of anxiety all day long every day and I don't know how much more of this I can take. I've had a little bit of stress recently, prior to my anxiety relapse but I didn't think it was enough to cause this. Every twinge or physical symptom I have I am convinced is a life threatening illness. 2 weeks ago I had chest X-rays, 4ecgs and a VQ scan because of air hunger and tachycardia/palpitations. All were clear. Why can't I accept this? What's wrong with me??? I keep going over everything in my head. I've had about 15 different illnesses (in my mind) over the last two weeks. I keep obsessing over cancer in particular. Lymphoma is a big one for me as I've had swollen nodes in my neck for upwards of 8 years (one since I was 4 and I'm now 26). I'm so scared all of the time. I was obsessing over a dvt this morning until I had a sharp stabbing pain in my left side. Now its ovarian cancer.
I can't do this anymore. I can't stop my thoughts and I can't stop crying. I want to enjoy my life but I'm constantly feeling doomed and scared to plan anything incase I get a diagnosis of a terminal illness.
I am so convinced my symptoms aren't anxiety. I don't get them just during panic attacks but then again I am always worrying lately. When I move I'm constantly thinking 'can I breathe?' I keep checking my heart rate and temperature because I'm terrified of low grade fevers.
I've had anxiety for years but it was manageable. I was doing so well - I'm a nurse and was enjoying my job before all this happened. Now I can't even leave the house for very long.
I'm so worried that my thoughts aren't anxiety and that I'm actually psychic or something 😑. Despite any medical knowledge that I have I can't rationalise!! It's like all that knowledge that stemmed from interest has turned into panic and fear.
Sorry to moan and I'm aware I sound very irrational but my mind is convinced something is wrong.
Xxx
I can't cope with this anymore. I've had a complete meltdown. I am in a constant state of anxiety all day long every day and I don't know how much more of this I can take. I've had a little bit of stress recently, prior to my anxiety relapse but I didn't think it was enough to cause this. Every twinge or physical symptom I have I am convinced is a life threatening illness. 2 weeks ago I had chest X-rays, 4ecgs and a VQ scan because of air hunger and tachycardia/palpitations. All were clear. Why can't I accept this? What's wrong with me??? I keep going over everything in my head. I've had about 15 different illnesses (in my mind) over the last two weeks. I keep obsessing over cancer in particular. Lymphoma is a big one for me as I've had swollen nodes in my neck for upwards of 8 years (one since I was 4 and I'm now 26). I'm so scared all of the time. I was obsessing over a dvt this morning until I had a sharp stabbing pain in my left side. Now its ovarian cancer.
I can't do this anymore. I can't stop my thoughts and I can't stop crying. I want to enjoy my life but I'm constantly feeling doomed and scared to plan anything incase I get a diagnosis of a terminal illness.
I am so convinced my symptoms aren't anxiety. I don't get them just during panic attacks but then again I am always worrying lately. When I move I'm constantly thinking 'can I breathe?' I keep checking my heart rate and temperature because I'm terrified of low grade fevers.
I've had anxiety for years but it was manageable. I was doing so well - I'm a nurse and was enjoying my job before all this happened. Now I can't even leave the house for very long.
I'm so worried that my thoughts aren't anxiety and that I'm actually psychic or something 😑. Despite any medical knowledge that I have I can't rationalise!! It's like all that knowledge that stemmed from interest has turned into panic and fear.
Sorry to moan and I'm aware I sound very irrational but my mind is convinced something is wrong.
Xxx