View Full Version : Just venting
Sick of feeling low. The last time I remember being happy was when my daughter was a baby and I was in my late teens. I'm 28 now and painfully unhappy. However, at least I'm not sitting crying and feeling deathly 24/7.
I get days where I think, screw other people, I am who I am and won't change for anybody, then a small comment will be made and I'll go back to square one and feel massively inferior to everybody else.
I also have BDD and am hopefully getting therapy specifically for that in upcoming months, but it's currently worse than ever and I wish I never had to leave the house. My skin is horrendous and I've had an almost permanent breakout since February. The longest I've ever had. Usually I get a 2/3 week breakout once or twice a year. Getting fed up. Feel so self conscious, caught sight of myself in a mirror in a shop the other day and genuinely laughed out loud at the state I was in. My hair was a frizzy, curly mess (was very windy that day), I wear trampy shoes and a big black coat every single day. I genuinely thought it was hilarious to see myself in such a state as it just shows how little I can be bothered lately. Suppose you have to laugh about it sometimes.
[QUOTE=KeeKee;1675873]Sick of feeling low. The last time I remember being happy was when my daughter was a baby and I was in my late teens. I'm 28 now and painfully unhappy. However, at least I'm not sitting crying and feeling deathly 24/7.
I get days where I think, screw other people, I am who I am and won't change for anybody, then a small comment will be made and I'll go back to square one and feel massively inferior to everybody else.
I also have BDD and am hopefully getting therapy specifically for that in upcoming months, but it's currently worse than ever and I wish I never had to leave the house. My skin is horrendous and I've had an almost permanent breakout since February. The longest I've ever had. Usually I get a 2/3 week breakout once or twice a year. Getting fed up. Feel so self conscious, caught sight of myself in a mirror in a shop the other day and genuinely laughed out loud at the state I was in. My hair was a frizzy, curly mess (was very windy that day), I wear trampy shoes and a big black coat every single day. I genuinely thought it was hilarious to see myself in such a state as it just shows how little I can be bothered lately. Suppose you have to laugh about it sometimes.[/QUOTEKeeKee you aren't the only one to feel like this! Think you have to put those small comments out with the other rubbish in your life for eg; You Ex you have managed to make changes there, so I believe in time (and you are only still quite young and the good side of 40 ha ha) The thing is you can make subtle changes on the outside that will then make changes on the inside :) Only you can achieve this. Once you start your therapy you could be surprised on how different you feel about 'YOU' I am going to post that link about that song for you here. Do listen to all the lyrics too I think it will make a lot of sense well it does to me Now I will go and find it. what ever link I type here doesn't seem to work so search for the seekers and Georgie Girl and do play it. And replace the persons name with either your username or real name and keep playing it till it makes a difference in your life I don't like seeing you like this KeeKee Cheers
I don't know what changes I could make though. I can't see things more positively because I strongly believe people my age are judged a lot on appearance. What makes things even harder is that until around 4/5 years ago, I did get 'looked at' by men. I don't understand how I've become unattractive in a few short years. My skin is a little worse and I'm obviously a little older but surely that can't make much difference.
A few people have suggested I wear nicer clothes but I'm just too self conscious.
Yeah I tried the link and it said error 400 or something. I'll type it in
Just going to try this: https://youtu.be/wsIbfYEizLk It's working now KeeKee :)
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I don't know what changes I could make though. I can't see things more positively because I strongly believe people my age are judged a lot on appearance. What makes things even harder is that until around 4/5 years ago, I did get 'looked at' by men. I don't understand how I've become unattractive in a few short years. My skin is a little worse and I'm obviously a little older but surely that can't make much difference.
A few people have suggested I wear nicer clothes but I'm just too self conscious.
Yeah I tried the link and it said error 400 or something. I'll type it in
Think you have to knock the judgement on the head wether its in magazines or on telly I think the thing is you have allowed your self to deteriorate some what think those people are right try some nicer clothes as the lyrics in this song says so I chose this song specialy for you because I think it applies to you and other people too who are in a crisis :) Cheers
Ok so I listened to it. Not my kind of music but the lyrics made me laugh as it is me a little (clothes you wear, window shopping haha). Especially since I've just mentioned people suggesting I wear nicer clothing.
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It's easier said that done with clothes though, I feel extremely self conscious wearing nice clothes I'm not entirely sure why. It's not TV or magazines that make me feel low, it's just the way I feel. I used to be skinny, I hated it. I used to be 'curvy', I hated it. Now I'm in between, I hate it.
Also I feel like because I'm so self conscious people aren't honest with me, so I don't know whether I suit one thing or not. Or they'll be brutally honest and tell me I dress like I think I'm 18 or something. There's no middle ground. So I have zero idea what kind of clothes suit me etc. Then there's my skin which is making me feel horrendous.
If I was happy about one thing, I'd be fine. But my favourite features from my teens are now also ruined and I like nothing about myself and am truly repulsed by the way I look.
Ok so I listened to it. Not my kind of music but the lyrics made me laugh as it is me a little (clothes you wear, window shopping haha). Especially since I've just mentioned people suggesting I wear nicer clothing.Well I said it was about the lyrics :) does it make sense to you? To me it does , you don't have spend vast amounts of money to get noticed but make some changes and those same people and other will see a difference in you and will make comments to that effect you mark my words! Tell you if I lived close by to you and would take you to the shops my self :) Just little changes will make a difference don't leave it till you are old and grey hun it's too late when you feel low play the song again and again I actually think its a catchy little song but each to their own Personally I want to see you happy Keekee venting is good to get it out in the open, but to stay as you are is not doing you any good! Cheers
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Ok so I listened to it. Not my kind of music but the lyrics made me laugh as it is me a little (clothes you wear, window shopping haha). Especially since I've just mentioned people suggesting I wear nicer clothing.
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It's easier said that done with clothes though, I feel extremely self conscious wearing nice clothes I'm not entirely sure why. It's not TV or magazines that make me feel low, it's just the way I feel. I used to be skinny, I hated it. I used to be 'curvy', I hated it. Now I'm in between, I hate it.
Also I feel like because I'm so self conscious people aren't honest with me, so I don't know whether I suit one thing or not. Or they'll be brutally honest and tell me I dress like I think I'm 18 or something. There's no middle ground. So I have zero idea what kind of clothes suit me etc. Then there's my skin which is making me feel horrendous.
If I was happy about one thing, I'd be fine. But my favourite features from my teens are now also ruined and I like nothing about myself and am truly repulsed by the way I look. Yes I hear you there will be a deep down reason why you think like you do, the sooner you start your therapy the better :) Listen it's not what others think in that sense it's wether you like that new dress/ blouse or what ever to hell with what other's think. make that a goal Ie: Iam going to get (even a couple) of nice clothes just think it could well make you think you know I actually like what I have bought once you start feeling even slightly better about your self you self esteem will get better and better I have been there my self so know it's possible. It's time to jump down from the shelf and live :) Sending positive vibes and :hugs:to you Cheers
The thing is compliments also make me feel extremely uncomfortable. I've been told I'm attractive by therapists and counsellor but it makes me feel really bad, I've no idea why but I literally feel like crying. It feels like I've got to change who I am for others to approve and I just don't get why I'm not good enough as me. Don't get me wrong, I agree with the clothes thing, I honestly did look like a tramp the other day when I caught sight of myself so I know I need to sort that out, but I can't just overcome 13 years or excruciatingly low self esteem.
I just wish I could not care what I looked like.
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Yes I get what you mean bigboy in regards to whether I like the clothing. There have been times I've seen a jacket as an example but wouldn't buy it as it wasn't long enough to cover my upper thighs (my only chubby body part). I know I should just not care but I can't help it. It's definitely deep routed, I just can't get past it, I need to overcome this whole valuing myself on my appearance. Unfortunately for the time being though, that is exactly what I am doing.
Aww I'm sorry your feeling so low :hugs:
I hate my acne scarred skin to death. I get hormonal break outs. I still can't cope with my hair. I get male attention when I'm slimmer I've noticed. Family pretend it doesn't matter but they would wouldn't they?
I'm ugly as hell most days its not fair but intelligence is truthfully more important to me. Looks get boring I think. But I would think that way cos I've got none!
And when you're doing well, I know how it is to receive knock backs when people can (so diligently) "tell" that you are an anxious type or even worse...the dreaded shy person. Its like I'm here being social, this is currently the best I can do, why in the hell are you kicking me down you fool??!!
Yeah us women will never feel right looks-wise with so many messages and all eyes on us. Our bodies are a target for marketing campaigns and we feel crappy and ugly because of it. I wonder what women would really be like without all the media nonsense.
The thing is compliments also make me feel extremely uncomfortable. I've been told I'm attractive by therapists and counsellor but it makes me feel really bad, I've no idea why but I literally feel like crying. It feels like I've got to change who I am for others to approve and I just don't get why I'm not good enough as me. Don't get me wrong, I agree with the clothes thing, I honestly did look like a tramp the other day when I caught sight of myself so I know I need to sort that out, but I can't just overcome 13 years or excruciatingly low self esteem.
I just wish I could not care what I looked like. It's probably 2 fold here one you don't get a lot of nice comments and 2 you actually don't believe them when they are said. Well glad you said it your self you looked like a tramp maybe this will kick you up the butt And :yesyes: You have admitted that and you also state you need to sort that out Ahh Great :) And yes 13 years is a very long time to get out of the current thinking but it can be done honestly I was that low about 3 months ago I actually wanted to die yes true, but not now. sure things are terribly good for me but I am making progress and that's all you need to do is make some progress, how ever small it is then you will be on your way thinking Iam making head way :) Do it for you ok :) Cheers
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Think we really need to help KeeKee as much as possible with positive vibes, messages etc I have been there my self only because of stupid comments what other people have said in the past sure they hurt (that's why they are said) but they need to be thrown out as far away as you can thrown them pick your self up and move on :) Cheers
Bee84 yes it's like we stick out like a sore thumb. Even worse is when people take our anxiety as rudeness. I've had somebody tell me their friend thought I was rude because I didn't speak to them. Made me feel horrible especially as this person knows I'm shy so I believe they should have told their friend this is why I don't speak to people.
I don't think it was the cause of my issues, but when I was skinny I got comments (off men) about having no boobs, I was asked how skinny my legs were, even the nurse I saw when pregnant said "Look how skinny your arms are". Then I gained a lot of weight on antidepressants and was borderline overweight which made matters worse. Now I'm a healthy weight but hate my shape. It's like a never ending nightmare.
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I know you've been there bigboy I remember reading your posts. And yes it's exactly right that I don't believe compliments. There have been the odd one where a relative has said "You look nice today" and I do believe they were genuine, but it's when I wear clothes I don't feel comfortable in.
I'm just so lazy or just ridiculously unmotivated that I just can't be bothered to exercise most days. I flippin' hate it! But looking good and feeling in shape is just so worthwhile but its all in aid of health I'd say along with feeling strong within and not exactly for attracting compliments.
I've had an old friend when we were teens who told me their friend was shy when I had curiously asked why was she so quiet. I did find that very odd. She would literally only say one sentence the whole day we were out. To this day I'm sure she hated me! So I know that side.
People just think I'm sad and want to comfort me or another time with estranged cousins I didn't say much but we were eating and watching a movie. The next day my cousin texts me that my other cousin said "she's too quiet" It was totally unexpected, my heart dropped. I emailed him on Facebook and he said "you're nice but you're too quiet" I left them because I couldnt stand not fitting in. Its a shame.
I don't exercise, excluding walking but that's only 30 mins a day or so. I'm not bothered about looking fit or anything but as you say in the aid of health it's probably a good idea.
I don't fit in in many ways. One relative once pointed out that I don't speak to children, that is because I really don't like children. Not that I'd admit that, but that is the truth. Just another reason for society to think I'm a loser.
I'm not much of a talker even to those I'm comfortable around. I am the type who absolutely loves the silence (although the sound of rain is equally as appealing).
I'm just so lazy or just ridiculously unmotivated that I just can't be bothered to exercise most days. I flippin' hate it! But looking good and feeling in shape is just so worthwhile but its all in aid of health I'd say along with feeling strong within and not exactly for attracting compliments.
I've had an old friend when we were teens who told me their friend was shy when I had curiously asked why was she so quiet. I did find that very odd. She would literally only say one sentence the whole day we were out. To this day I'm sure she hated me! So I know that side.
People just think I'm sad and want to comfort me or another time with estranged cousins I didn't say much but we were eating and watching a movie. The next day my cousin texts me that my other cousin said "she's too quiet" It was totally unexpected, my heart dropped. I emailed him on Facebook and he said "you're nice but you're too quiet" I left them because I couldnt stand not fitting in. Its a shame. The fact is you were told that this friend of a old friend was shy there is nothing strange about that :) The cousin was only being true full said you were nice which is great but you are too quite, no one is saying you have to talk for England lol but does the cousin now the reason why you are quite? I certainly wouldn't take it to heart :)
I used to be a very quite person for many reasons like will I fit in or will I say some thing I shouldn't then stay quite cause it was safer to do so, but now talk too much lol like when I whats app some one on here we always got plenty to talk about ha ha And it helps take my mind off other things so it's finding a balance Cheers
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I don't exercise, excluding walking but that's only 30 mins a day or so. I'm not bothered about looking fit or anything but as you say in the aid of health it's probably a good idea.
I don't fit in in many ways. One relative once pointed out that I don't speak to children, that is because I really don't like children. Not that I'd admit that, but that is the truth. Just another reason for society to think I'm a loser.
I'm not much of a talker even to those I'm comfortable around. I am the type who absolutely loves the silence (although the sound of rain is equally as appealing). It is a very good ldea to continue with this and maybe increase it to 45 mins gradually I too don't talk to children either but It's been never said to me and you aren't a loser Keekee you think you are but you aren't and you unique in your own right :) Have you thought about joining a meditation class or reiki again there will be people there but it's why they are there :) You are stuck in rut Iam trying to pull you out but you are hard work but worth fighting for :) Cheers
I've done meditation at home and it's just not for me. I've also had relaxation CD's. I definitely wouldn't go to a group either. I wouldn't even go to prenatal groups or anything when pregnant. I don't like being around groups of people, that's not just my anxiety speaking. I don't want to be around people, it's not that I hate people or anything it's just that I prefer to be alone. There has never been a time I've seriously craved company. Ever.
I am stuck in a rut but unfortunately until I can get over this appearance issue I can't see things changing. I'm beyond miserable and feel like everything is difficult due to my body image issues, I even despise my skin colour and everything. I don't believe being around others will change this. Being around people just makes me more stressed. I have Misophonia too and feel like hittng people if I can hear them breathing loudly etc. I'm much more relaxed alone in the quietness of my own home.
Ahh all I can say is I understand except I like my skin colour but my hair...? Omg I'll probably never have a good relationship with it.
Are you black? I feel disconnection and isolation from the black community because of social anxiety. I feel I don't know... Like I'm not enough for them, a disappointment maybe?
You don't have to force yourself into new age or whatever. Its bloody annoying when these mindfulness bashers go around recruiting people. Although true spiritually is definitely important and lacking in society.
I've heard that the mind itself, in its natural state is meditation without forcefully needing to meditate. I think its all about forgiving myself and others, which I've only just started to build on with the teeny tiniest speck of hope. Better late than never.
No Bee, I am pale skinned. Very pale to the point it looks unhealthy. I also hate my hair colour, although it doesn't cause me distress. I have that not quite blonde, but not quite brown colour hair. I was once very fair haired.
Whenever I've tried mindfulness in the past it feels like I'm forcing myself to do something I don't want to do. I just don't get it. My very first attempt was the whole, imagine a raisin in your hand, it's texture etc. Didn't like it at all.
All I want is to stop worrying about the way I look. I absolutely hate it. I'm obsessed and can't stop looking in the mirror etc. I don't get why I'm so shallow. Seriously don't get it. I dont judge others by their appearance, so why do I judge myself?!?
OK we definitely don't understand each other on that point! What causes all this self hatred in us? I don't get it either.
Yeah forcing myself to not think feels almost like I'm bullying myself. Its good to be mindful of negative thought patterns and positive ones. Its the jumping onto the band wagon I can't stand. I hate someone making me "awaken" I'm truly just as good as the basher.
Yeah I feel ugly most of the time but I just don't know why. All my hatred goes onto my body. Even hatred for others. I try to make myself look in the mirror because I can't stand it.
I think we must be judging others critically too and there's guilt from that which we repress it. Do you ever go to the salon, beautician stuff like that?
No I don't go to the salon or anything
I often wonder if my self hatred and the fact I value myself on my appearance is due to the fact I've never had nice things said about me as a person. In my late teens and very early 20's I did used to get chatted up quite a bit. I even got comments that said I could be a model (I was very slim, that'll probably be why). But never did anybody say I was a nice person, kind etc. So I often wonder if that's why I value myself on my appearance and now I feel haggard I am filled with self loathing.
Oh yes I see perfectly where you're coming from. I was praised for my hair which I immediately placed high value on.
Not to play the violin but my mother only praised me based on performance not on the person inside. I agree, its OK to value looks and looking good but its just that there are other simple values such as how kind a person is or how they light up a room or something. Real deep core values. It doesn't help that the media gives us the message that a high value woman is only good looking. Do you see yourself as kind??
I can't blame the media though at the end of the day. Some women have surpassed all the madness so it must be possible for us.
Yeah I get what you mean. I don't think I blame media at all for my issues as I've had them since I was 15. Back then I didn't go online, buy magazines etc. It's only been recent years I've been looking online at the likes of Dailymail etc.
I don't really know if I'd class myself as kind. I guess it depends on what situation I'm in. I certainly don't light up a room though. I'm not a jolly, outgoing person. I'm an introverted type. However I believe I'm fairly non judgemental, I'm a good listener, would never speak down to people etc. I have my good qualities, but also bad ones.
Yeah I get what you mean. I don't think I blame media at all for my issues as I've had them since I was 15. Back then I didn't go online, buy magazines etc. It's only been recent years I've been looking online at the likes of Dailymail etc.
I don't really know if I'd class myself as kind. I guess it depends on what situation I'm in. I certainly don't light up a room though. I'm not a jolly, outgoing person. I'm an introverted type. However I believe I'm fairly non judgemental, I'm a good listener, would never speak down to people etc. I have my good qualities, but also bad ones.KeeKee you only have to look back to the days when you were chatted up so think back how did you look then what style was your hair, was your complexsion any different to what it is now? Even remotely any difference back then could be the key to a new you?!! I mean you either want to stay as you are or you want to change, The fact is you are unhappy right now so try hard to make a few changes to you and your mind. And you have mentioned some very good traits too that you have keep hold them and we all have a good and bad points too :) Cheers
Bigboy I used to have a tan, lovely hair, nice skin, didn't have dark circles. These are things I simply cannot change.
My hair condition deteriorated about 2 years ago, the same time I developed really dark circles. I deep condition, use heat protection spray, no longer use high heat with straighteners or hairdryer. I have no idea what has happened. It's also only the top layer which makes it even more strange as that's the layer that gets the least heat damage. My hair itself can look ok at times. Especially if I haven't just washed it, but I don't suit this colour. I used to bleach my hair but it would snap in the condition it's in. Everybody I know has told me I look better with lighter hair.
I wouldn't dare go on the sunbeds and fake tan makes me really itchy as I have sensitive skin and contact dermatitis.
My complexion is horrible, but there's little I feel I can do, I'm using a topical treatment and it can take time to work, but I've had bad skin for 8 years now and have been told it is hormonal. I basically have to grow out of it. I have to be careful of what makeup I use as the topical treatment I use causes skin sensitivity. I feel disgusting.
I've also been eating the healthiest and littlest I've ever ate for 10 weeks now, I wonder if that could have set my skin off. I have lost 6lbs so that's a plus.
That's great KeeKee, nearly half a stone. I'm in the process of losing pounds myself. I used to have a routine with my hair and cleansing my skin. I used to get comments on my "flawless" skin. Cant believe that was even me... those days are gone! And if you ever find that miraculous cure for dark circles, please share it with me.
Bigboy I used to have a tan, lovely hair, nice skin, didn't have dark circles. These are things I simply cannot change.
My hair condition deteriorated about 2 years ago, the same time I developed really dark circles. I deep condition, use heat protection spray, no longer use high heat with straighteners or hairdryer. I have no idea what has happened. It's also only the top layer which makes it even more strange as that's the layer that gets the least heat damage. My hair itself can look ok at times. Especially if I haven't just washed it, but I don't suit this colour. I used to bleach my hair but it would snap in the condition it's in. Everybody I know has told me I look better with lighter hair.
I wouldn't dare go on the sunbeds and fake tan makes me really itchy as I have sensitive skin and contact dermatitis.
My complexion is horrible, but there's little I feel I can do, I'm using a topical treatment and it can take time to work, but I've had bad skin for 8 years now and have been told it is hormonal. I basically have to grow out of it. I have to be careful of what makeup I use as the topical treatment I use causes skin sensitivity. I feel disgusting.
I've also been eating the healthiest and littlest I've ever ate for 10 weeks now, I wonder if that could have set my skin off. I have lost 6lbs so that's a plus. Dear me KeeKee you say you don't think you can change these things, well unless you try you will never know they aren't going to change on their own. Have you considered a beauty specialist these people are trained in this field? They can even come to your house tell them your skin type etc I mean basically I am saying don't be a defeatist or give up on this quest you simple cant do this unless you are happy as you are? So if it's hormonal see your Gp I got a feeling you will be venting for years to come there are answers out there KeeKee it's now your job to find them. Iam doing my best to help you. Cheers
That's great KeeKee, nearly half a stone. I'm in the process of losing pounds myself. I used to have a routine with my hair and cleansing my skin. I used to get comments on my "flawless" skin. Cant believe that was even me... those days are gone! And if you ever find that miraculous cure for dark circles, please share it with me.
Dark circles are a nightmare aren't they. Virtually impossible to find the cause of them too. My goal was to lose 10lbs but I'm more than halfway there and look minimally different. I'm only 9 stone so not heavy, but want to have smaller thighs, even 1 or 2 inches off them would make me happy. Although my weight doesn't make me feel low so it's not that big of a deal if I don't lose much more.
That's great KeeKee, nearly half a stone. I'm in the process of losing pounds myself. I used to have a routine with my hair and cleansing my skin. I used to get comments on my "flawless" skin. Cant believe that was even me... those days are gone! And if you ever find that miraculous cure for dark circles, please share it with me. That is really positive on KeeKee's part so well done. There must be a cure or something for these dark circles simply Google it I would have thought until KeeKee has had a look she will never know if there isn't then fair enough, And re the weight thing I thought I was never going to lose 5 stone I was doomed and thought this is the end I was trapped, but then found help, didn't argue about it, took the help and now down to just over 11 stone :) So anything is possible if you try hard :) Cheers
Dear me KeeKee you say you don't think you can change these things, well unless you try you will never know they aren't going to change on their own. Have you considered a beauty specialist these people are trained in this field? They can even come to your house tell them your skin type etc I mean basically I am saying don't be a defeatist or give up on this quest you simple cant do this unless you are happy as you are? So if it's hormonal see your Gp I got a feeling you will be venting for years to come there are answers out there KeeKee it's now your job to find them. Iam doing my best to help you. Cheers
Bigboy I have tried (except the skin colour), I've tried drinking more water, I've tried loads of hair treatments, I've tried different foundations etc but they end up stinging my face or causing more breakouts (although the breakouts from makeup aren't as bad as my regular breakouts).
As for my skin, I'm at the GP very frequently due to it and have been for a good 4 years now. I'm currently on my third treatment for my skin.
I couldn't afford to pay somebody to look at my skin. I've tried asking my GP what could be causing my dark circles etc but they've no idea as there can be so many reasons. I'm inclined to think it's stress related, if that's at all possible.
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Bigboy I have Googled it. I've asked my GP, I've discussed it with my last therapy. It would seem without knowing the cause, a cure is almost impossible. I've thought about allergies and all sorts, but don't want to take antihistamines unless an allergy is confirmed. I've tried tea bags, cold spoons etc.
I don't even have good days and bad days like some people, they are literally there every day and no member of either side of my family has dark circles so it's certainly not hereditary.
I think mine is circulation related. I saw one of my baby cousins has them slightly bless her but not anyone else in my family has them and most are mixed so are all different skin tones.
I've put massive amounts of rosehip oil onto my eyes and had a minor bit of luck. Rosehip is antioxidant so mine must also be free radical related as well as circulatory. My circles are literally circles, they go all the way around.
I had my wisdom teeth out early this year and opted for general anaesthetic. I awoke with no dark circles as the blood, I guess, had rushed to my face to heal up the empty tooth sockets. The miracle lasted about 3 days. I stupidly thought they were gone forever! :laugh:
Could be that it's even psychosomatic or stress like you say. If it was a caused by hyper pigmentation, I could use a cream or whatever.
I was ridiculed at school by my friends who would comment that my eyes looked "burnt" or "in" or too "baggy" that meant rejection to my fragile teenage self. So Bdd was there from then onwards.
I've googled and googled even tried spiritual healing, meditation and Reiki. The truth is I haven't tried everything though if they're still here. Don't know what to try next. I'll do almost anything to get rid of them.
Bigboy I have tried (except the skin colour), I've tried drinking more water, I've tried loads of hair treatments, I've tried different foundations etc but they end up stinging my face or causing more breakouts (although the breakouts from makeup aren't as bad as my regular breakouts).
As for my skin, I'm at the GP very frequently due to it and have been for a good 4 years now. I'm currently on my third treatment for my skin.
I couldn't afford to pay somebody to look at my skin. I've tried asking my GP what could be causing my dark circles etc but they've no idea as there can be so many reasons. I'm inclined to think it's stress related, if that's at all possible.
---------- Post added at 13:25 ---------- Previous post was at 13:22 ----------
Bigboy I have Googled it. I've asked my GP, I've discussed it with my last therapy. It would seem without knowing the cause, a cure is almost impossible. I've thought about allergies and all sorts, but don't want to take antihistamines unless an allergy is confirmed. I've tried tea bags, cold spoons etc.
I don't even have good days and bad days like some people, they are literally there every day and no member of either side of my family has dark circles so it's certainly not hereditary. Ahh it's tough can see you have been on this a long time. Can your dr refer you to a skin specialist? Even though you have really tried to nail the problem. It's a question of process of elimination, you already ruled out a hereditary condition, so rule out a few more things like diet or even more sunlight may be needed so sit out in the your back yard/garden and I will ask any other female members who have nailed this problem to join in on your thread, If I knew the answer I would be posting it here for you :) Think also you have let your self go a bit which is sad, but have been there my self I am still not out of the woods with this damn lonliness which no one seems to care about. And it may be just something simple in your case that no professional person has actually said yes this is the reasons why lets try xyz So for now think it's just a question of letting your gp know you aint happy you need certain things looking in to to change your image you have to keep plodding on KeeKee I wish you every success in this :) Cheers
That is really positive on KeeKee's part so well done. There must be a cure or something for these dark circles simply Google it I would have thought until KeeKee has had a look she will never know if there isn't then fair enough, And re the weight thing I thought I was never going to lose 5 stone I was doomed and thought this is the end I was trapped, but then found help, didn't argue about it, took the help and now down to just over 11 stone :) So anything is possible if you try hard :) Cheers
WOW! 5 frickin' stone??! That's amazing I could move mountains if I'd achieved that!
[QUOTE=Bee84;1676188]WOW! 5 frickin' stone??! That's amazing I could move mountains if I'd achieved that![/QUOTE Thank you it wasn't easy, but with the help and support from Over Eaters Anonymous the support was great and haven't looked back since :) Are you saying you need to lose 5 stone? Or what ever weight you are looking to lose its achievable! If I can do so can any one :hugs:Cheers
1 stone is my target. Damn food cravings and boredom plus the foot dragging when it comes to exercise. I'm glad you found your inner strength. I look up to you.
Bee it's awful you got called for your dark circles. Children can be so evil. I guess I'm 'lucky' as I didn't have mine when I was in school. My upper eyes aren't too bad, it's mainly my lower eyes. So I guess dark semi-circles ;-)
They also get puffy at times too, but that isn't constant so I can live with it.
Bigboy I have been tempted to ask my GP to refer me to a dermatologist but I feel too embarrassed asking. Plus my acne is apparently mild so I doubt it'd be seen as necessary. As for going outside in the sun, who knows. I haven't really had any sun exposure for years but again, I can't have any skin exposed and my makeup contains an spf, so the only way I'd get vitamin D is through my hands.
I honestly don't think I've let myself go. My hair and makeup routine is the same as it's always been, I just look what I would describe as 'haggard'. I don't ever leave the house without styling my hair or putting on my makeup. I do dress somewhat trampy, but always have. You can just get away with it more when you're younger. For example I wear comfy boots as opposed to pretty shoes. I have to walk up a bank for the school and sometimes a similar walk to the bus stop. My feet are full of blisters, even months old blisters that haven't yet healed so I always stick to walking type boots. They always make me look dressed down, but again, the fact that I need to walk places makes it hard to wear nicer shoes. I'd love to be able to wear heeled boots, but don't like walking too long in them.
1 stone is my target. Damn food cravings and boredom plus the foot dragging when it comes to exercise. I'm glad you found your inner strength. I look up to you.Well it's well achievable, Yes boredom did play a big part of it for me I was a very big comfort eater only to learn I was self harming my self at the time I would have denied it not now yes still get very bored but I think to my self I was totally unhappy back then and don't want to be totally in that mess again as it doesn't solve nothing :) well thanks for the nice comments :) Hey you can do this do you have any one living with you? If you do perhaps that will encourage you to make a start :) Within a month that stone could be banished for good :) Find the strength like I did wether it's support from friends and family or indeed the OA Group I attended support is support at the end of the day! Cheers
---------- Post added at 14:59 ---------- Previous post was at 14:45 ----------
Bee it's awful you got called for your dark circles. Children can be so evil. I guess I'm 'lucky' as I didn't have mine when I was in school. My upper eyes aren't too bad, it's mainly my lower eyes. So I guess dark semi-circles ;-)
They also get puffy at times too, but that isn't constant so I can live with it.
Bigboy I have been tempted to ask my GP to refer me to a dermatologist but I feel too embarrassed asking. Plus my acne is apparently mild so I doubt it'd be seen as necessary. As for going outside in the sun, who knows. I haven't really had any sun exposure for years but again, I can't have any skin exposed and my makeup contains an spf, so the only way I'd get vitamin D is through my hands.
I honestly don't think I've let myself go. My hair and makeup routine is the same as it's always been, I just look what I would describe as 'haggard'. I don't ever leave the house without styling my hair or putting on my makeup. I do dress somewhat trampy, but always have. You can just get away with it more when you're younger. For example I wear comfy boots as opposed to pretty shoes. I have to walk up a bank for the school and sometimes a similar walk to the bus stop. My feet are full of blisters, even months old blisters that haven't yet healed so I always stick to walking type boots. They always make me look dressed down, but again, the fact that I need to walk places makes it hard to wear nicer shoes. I'd love to be able to wear heeled boots, but don't like walking too long in them.KeeKee hand on heart you say you are tempted to ask your dr about a referral but you feel embarrassed to ask hey dr's have heard/seen a lot more embarrising things before they wont be shocked neither will they judge you so pluck up the courage and ask your dr for that referral please do it for you :) I have to have a operation down stairs on a very private part but not bothred about the dr seeing it: Put your problems in to prospective KeeKee :) Ha Ha you really think you get away with it when you are younger nah don't think so, kids today like the latest trends and unfortunately if you don't dress like them then they will mock and make your life hell and that would hurt. Just try some different clothes when you go out even a different top or what ever :) As for your feet a chiropodiest can help it's one thing at time and baby steps is what you need to do. I wont be here in 12 months saying the same things to you either not being funny or mean but it wont help you if I do :)
Had mine since 14 and friends were the ones to point it out.
Before then I was actually blind to them strangely.
The dermatologist would give professional advice on your skin if you went. Please ask if you really want to go, because I bet they won't think your case is too mild or stupid or lecture you or anything. Just very common and easy to treat. They've probably witnessed miracles. If you don't mind taking medications or advice its worth going. Vitamin D is so good for oily skin I know because I've taken it.
Do you wear black a lot of the time? I got some low heeled boots which look OK but I wear trousers and jeans mostly not short skirts as I feel they aren't "allowed."
Whenever I try to wear nice feminine clothing people will comment on how cold I must be or talk like I'm gonna get jumped or something which is so bloody ignorant. I don't get why people make women feel guilty for this, its soooo annoying.
No you're a good healthy weight and don't leave the house without make up so you couldn't have let yourself go. Maybe just need to look within yourself a bit more at those values you mentioned before such as kindness.
Had mine since 14 and friends were the ones to point it out.
Before then I was actually blind to them strangely.
The dermatologist would give professional advice on your skin if you went. Please ask if you really want to go, because I bet they won't think your case is too mild or stupid or lecture you or anything. Just very common and easy to treat. They've probably witnessed miracles. If you don't mind taking medications or advice its worth going. Vitamin D is so good for oily skin I know because I've taken it.
Do you wear black a lot of the time? I got some low heeled boots which look OK but I wear trousers and jeans mostly not short skirts as I feel they aren't "allowed."
Whenever I try to wear nice feminine clothing people will comment on how cold I must be or talk like I'm gonna get jumped or something which is so bloody ignorant. I don't get why people make women feel guilty for this, its soooo annoying.
No you're a good healthy weight and don't leave the house without make up so you couldn't have let yourself go. Maybe just need to look within yourself a bit more at those values you mentioned before such as kindness.Bee84 what a great post and good advice :) and the way I look at it sod every one else if you have got clothes on and you think deep down you like them that's good :) And give ignorant people a very wide berth ha ha they aren't worth knowing!!
[QUOTE=Bigboyuk;1676212]Well it's well achievable, Yes boredom did play a big part of it for me I was a very big comfort eater only to learn I was self harming my self at the time I would have denied it not now yes still get very bored but I think to my self I was totally unhappy back then and don't want to be totally in that mess again as it doesn't solve nothing :) well thanks for the nice comments :) Hey you can do this do you have any one living with you? If you do perhaps that will encourage you to make a start :) Within a month that stone could be banished for good :) Find the strength like I did wether it's support from friends and family or indeed the OA Group I attended support is support at the end of the day! Cheers[COLOR="blue"]
You're right it is self harming. I've had good changes before but they didn't last. I've got someone to lose weight with fortunately. I don't really know what I'm doing with myself and it needs to stop today.
That's the thing though bigboy, we should be allowed to wear what we like without fear of judgement but I've had people comment on my clothing. I've never been called as such but I have been told I dress like a teenager.
I strongly hope therapy can help me get over this "My appearance is everything" way of thinking. I know people who aren't what you'd call good looking (nor ugly though) and they lead happy lives. I don't know why I'm so bloody shallow.
Bee it's awful they pointed them out, if they hadn't mentioned them you may never have felt low because of them.
I guess I've been lucky that I've never really had my appearance scrutinised. I've had small comments such as I look tired, or I don't make an effort (I do and strongly believe it's my tired look that makes it seem that way) and when I first developed acne my relatives did used to say things such as "You're skins bad today", but that's stopped now fortunately. I was called skinny years ago, but I'm not skinny now so that's no longer an issue.
---------- Post added at 16:09 ---------- Previous post was at 16:07 ----------
Bigboy I think I mentioned I too was a comfort eater until very recently. I'd eat at least 2800 calories every single day. I'd buy foods specially to binge on a night. I don't gain weight easily though so was only 9 stone 6, but knew that i wasn't healthy on the inside. I think my relationship breakdown was what made me stop. I stick to 1800 calories a day which is still a fair amount, but I'm losing weight albeit very slowly so I must be doing something right.
[QUOTE=Bigboyuk;1676212]Well it's well achievable, Yes boredom did play a big part of it for me I was a very big comfort eater only to learn I was self harming my self at the time I would have denied it not now yes still get very bored but I think to my self I was totally unhappy back then and don't want to be totally in that mess again as it doesn't solve nothing :) well thanks for the nice comments :) Hey you can do this do you have any one living with you? If you do perhaps that will encourage you to make a start :) Within a month that stone could be banished for good :) Find the strength like I did wether it's support from friends and family or indeed the OA Group I attended support is support at the end of the day! Cheers
You're right it is self harming. I've had good changes before but they didn't last. I've got someone to lose weight with fortunately. I don't really know what I'm doing with myself and it needs to stop today. Ha ha not laughing at any thing you have said but next to my Cheers it says (Color='blue') and it's not even blue tech problem here Ahh! Yes same here so it makes me wonder where am I going wrong, whats made it like this. but they are only relapses and can be changed again in to successes :) Well you are half way there, if you have someone to lose weight with (wished I have had that back then)But I did have support from OA which really did help! So you know what Iam going to say there's no excuse for you now not to lose that 1 stone!! I want to hear your success in this Bee :) Cheers
---------- Post added at 16:27 ---------- Previous post was at 16:14 ----------
That's the thing though bigboy, we should be allowed to wear what we like without fear of judgement but I've had people comment on my clothing. I've never been called as such but I have been told I dress like a teenager.
I strongly hope therapy can help me get over this "My appearance is everything" way of thinking. I know people who aren't what you'd call good looking (nor ugly though) and they lead happy lives. I don't know why I'm so bloody shallow.
Bee it's awful they pointed them out, if they hadn't mentioned them you may never have felt low because of them.
I guess I've been lucky that I've never really had my appearance scrutinised. I've had small comments such as I look tired, or I don't make an effort (I do and strongly believe it's my tired look that makes it seem that way) and when I first developed acne my relatives did used to say things such as "You're skins bad today", but that's stopped now fortunately. I was called skinny years ago, but I'm not skinny now so that's no longer an issue.[COLOR=blue]
---------- Post added at 16:09 ---------- Previous post was at 16:07 ----------
Bigboy I think I mentioned I too was a comfort eater until very recently. I'd eat at least 2800 calories every single day. I'd buy foods specially to binge on a night. I don't gain weight easily though so was only 9 stone 6, but knew that i wasn't healthy on the inside. I think my relationship breakdown was what made me stop. I stick to 1800 calories a day which is still a fair amount, but I'm losing weight albeit very slowly so I must be doing something right. Totally agree KeeKee :) But you have said it your self you look trampy and if you are saying that then others will pick up on it!! Ditch that look straight away it's about you and no one else you need to radiate a nice karma about you think you aver messed up tbh As for your relatives saying your skin looks bad today they weren't trying to mock or hurt you they we trying to make you see something that you probably couldn't see back then, but now you can get that referral from your dr :) You have very positive traits let them shine through :) I am sure your break up didn't help[, but again that's a closed door now and you have survived that so well done:yesyes:
As for the weight thing you seem to be doing ok, but don't over do it ok!! You will get there and we all here routeing for you too :) Cheers
No bigboy I already knew about my skin. I have acne and have had it since I was 20. They also pointed out other relatives weight etc, and my roots when I used to dye my hair. They just have to have their opinion for everything.
My bad skin isn't something new. It's just really starting to get me down lately as I thought I'd have outgrown it by now.
As for looking trampy, yes I do but I don't mean I literally look like a tramp or like I need a bath, I just mean I dress down every single day. For example I wear skinny jeans, a black parka type coat and boots every single day without fail. A lot of other people wear these clothes too, just not everyday like me.
I can't really ditch this look as I don't have the money to buy new clothes yet. I will when my ESA is sorted properly. But as for now I'm stuck with my trusty coat and boots. I do have quite a few pairs of jeans now though, so it's not like I'm wearing the exact same outfit each day.
My dear at 32 I am making a point of dressing younger!!! At 9 stone and 28yrs it must feel safe to say to you that you dress like a teenager. You can.
Oh families can be so nice can't they?! Especially the older ones are like that I've noticed. The older women have told me that I've really packed on the pounds, then other times would frequently exclaim that I was so thin... can't win!
Maybe bring some colour into your new wardrobe like red. It's strong, sexy and powerful and pink is girly and pretty just like peach or yellow. White's good too, it's nice and fresh. I've mainly only been keeping my trousers black and it's nice to wear a colour other than black tops and jackets. I've even gotten male attention since this change at my ripe old age :)
No bigboy I already knew about my skin. I have acne and have had it since I was 20. They also pointed out other relatives weight etc, and my roots when I used to dye my hair. They just have to have their opinion for everything.
My bad skin isn't something new. It's just really starting to get me down lately as I thought I'd have outgrown it by now.
As for looking trampy, yes I do but I don't mean I literally look like a tramp or like I need a bath, I just mean I dress down every single day. For example I wear skinny jeans, a black parka type coat and boots every single day without fail. A lot of other people wear these clothes too, just not everyday like me.
I can't really ditch this look as I don't have the money to buy new clothes yet. I will when my ESA is sorted properly. But as for now I'm stuck with my trusty coat and boots. I do have quite a few pairs of jeans now though, so it's not like I'm wearing the exact same outfit each day.No I didn't mean you have just had skin problems for a short while for from it! And I know your relatives always have been opinionated on everything, so guess some people will always be like that, but not every one is like that either :) Again I didn't suggest anything about not being clean. It's a clothes issue here. Not much money same here but you can get some nice outfits etc at local charity shops or New Look or Primark all at a reasonable price too. So when your ESA is sorted then it's good idea to have a look around these places. Again the answer comes form within. Cheers
---------- Post added at 18:31 ---------- Previous post was at 18:23 ----------
My dear at 32 I am making a point of dressing younger!!! At 9 stone and 28yrs it must feel safe to say to you that you dress like a teenager. You can.
Oh families can be so nice can't they?! Especially the older ones are like that I've noticed. The older women have told me that I've really packed on the pounds, then other times would frequently exclaim that I was so thin... can't win!
Maybe bring some colour into your new wardrobe like red. It's strong, sexy and powerful and pink is girly and pretty just like peach or yellow. White's good too, it's nice and fresh. I've mainly only been keeping my trousers black and it's nice to wear a colour other than black tops and jackets. I've even gotten male attention since this change at my ripe old age :) Once again another post with good advice not being a woman I wouldn't have clue about sexy colours and woman's outfits :whistles: Ahh but it's all good to inject a ladys view point on this ;) Cheers
Oh wow Bee so it's not just my family!
My favourite colour is pink so I've been wanting a nice pink summer jacket. I might get one eventually. I also love that peachy pink colour that in right now.
Oh wow Bee so it's not just my family!
My favourite colour is pink so I've been wanting a nice pink summer jacket. I might get one eventually. I also love that peachy pink colour that in right now. Aww KeeKee That's so nice Iam sure you will treat 'yourself' when the ESA is finally sorted out :) You can do it I know you can ;) Cheers
Bigboy I know you didn't think I was dirty or anything I just didn't want people to misinterpret what I meant as trampy. And I was only mentioning my skin to state that that's not why my family mentioned it. I don't think they were trying to be mean or anything they just like to point things out. I get critised for the way we bring up my child and everything, so it's nothing new to me.
I will have a look about when I get my money. Funnily enough I've just bought a new top last week. Guess what colour - black haha. I'll buy some brighter clothes when I get my money sorted.
I know they wanna uphold an image for the family or something. I know you originally only wanted to vent but then you got lots of advice thrown at you! Its helps to know I'm not the only one who faces these issues. Its good to talk and let it all out and it allows me to gain another perspective.
Bigboy I know you didn't think I was dirty or anything I just didn't want people to misinterpret what I meant as trampy. And I was only mentioning my skin to state that that's not why my family mentioned it. I don't think they were trying to be mean or anything they just like to point things out. I get critised for the way we bring up my child and everything, so it's nothing new to me.
I will have a look about when I get my money. Funnily enough I've just bought a new top last week. Guess what colour - black haha. I'll buy some brighter clothes when I get my money sorted. KeeKee I didn't misinterpret what you said I knew what you meant :) Yes people can be very judgemental on how you look. but there is some one in my life who comes to see me most sat night they actually 'accept' me as I am, so that makes me feel good straight away :) even though they have MH problems them selves. Ahh well think your mindset is changing for the better black is out now lol it's bad colour and is only used for funerals ;) Not ever day wear!! Remember this true saying Rome wasn't built in a day think you will get there though I have faith in you for sure :yesyes: Be kind to your self cause you are worth it. Cheers
Thanks bigboy. I do like bright colours, but I also like black too I think it looks very smart (I love a black blazer with jeans and a t shirt). I love white jeans too.
---------- Post added at 19:10 ---------- Previous post was at 19:09 ----------
I know they wanna uphold an image for the family or something. I know you originally only wanted to vent but then you got lots of advice thrown at you! Its helps to know I'm not the only one who faces these issues. Its good to talk and let it all out and it allows me to gain another perspective.
Is it possible that you too, may have BDD? I only ask as if so, therapy may be an option?
Thanks bigboy. I do like bright colours, but I also like black too I think it looks very smart (I love a black blazer with jeans and a t shirt). I love white jeans too.
---------- Post added at 19:10 ---------- Previous post was at 19:09 ----------
Is it possible that you too, may have BDD? I only ask as if so, therapy may be an option? You are welcome KeeKee :) Yes so long as it's not everything black if you follow :) Have you any white jeans at present if not add that to the list!! I love black jeans too but I always wear a different colour T shirt. Plenty to mull over I think :) Cheers
Is it possible that you too, may have BDD? I only ask as if so, therapy may be an option?
All my therapists think its more social anxiety because I'm afraid of criticism and feel rejected by society because of my appearance (dark circles and acne etc.) And I agree with them. But yes I am high on bdd's spectrum.
All my therapists think its more social anxiety because I'm afraid of criticism and feel rejected by society because of my appearance (dark circles and acne etc.) Yes I am high on bdd's spectrum.Bee have you been diagnosed by your dr yet? It's good that we reach out to each other in times of need :)Cheers
Bee have you been diagnosed by your dr yet? It's good that we reach out to each other in times of need :)Cheers
Yes with depression and social anxiety. Been in therapy on and off 9 years. They tie the bdd in with the SA. I probably don't have enough symptoms to say that I've got bdd. Although sometimes I say to myself I've got it which I guess is strange. I also think I'm schizotypal and avoidant which I also just about don't have enough traits of to be diagnosed as such. What's your diagnosis?
Yes with depression and social anxiety. Been in therapy on and off 9 years. They tie the bdd in with the SA. I probably don't have enough symptoms to say that I've got bdd. Although sometimes I say to myself I've got it which I guess is strange. I also think I'm schizotypal and avoidant which I also just about don't have enough traits of to be diagnosed as such. What's your diagnosis? Are you on meds as well? I was told severe depression which even on it's own is a beast to deal with on a daily basis, but other things are involved too like low self esteem,low mojo and have recently been very anxious too wouldn't wish this on any one it's a terrible existence to go through daily :weep: Cheers
No meds. I haven't taken any for 7 years. I know they're not meant for me. I've seen a relative become dependent for life. I decided that emotions are a part of life. They can't be numbed down, I need to express them to function. Sometimes it hurts like hell but really and truly, I'm beginning to understand that I'm not in control of my thoughts and feelings some higher force is. Its like with the eating, I need to give up control cos I interfere with my own processes.
I know, I could never wish it on anyone. I know deep depression. I've felt so depressed and isolated in my early 20s of all times, that I was extremely ashamed to get help. I genuinely believed it was just a part of my personality. Its horrible isn't it? Being shunned never does help but why do people shun depressed/anxious people like that? They won't catch anything!
There is something wrong with us of course. People don't believe us. But what healthy person would stay away from people shut in their room for years??
There's no point pretending that people aren't depressed, that's childish. We need to help ourselves of course but when you get put down and criticised after an attempt at socializing it's very disheartening. So we stop trying and just talk to ourselves. Don't even know what I'm missing anymore but trying anyway.
My own vent in this venting thread! But yeah I understand how it feels. Are you working right now or looking? Are you taking meds?
No meds. I haven't taken any for 7 years. I know they're not meant for me. I've seen a relative become dependent for life. I decided that emotions are a part of life. They can't be numbed down, I need to express them to function. Sometimes it hurts like hell but really and truly, I'm beginning to understand that I'm not in control of my thoughts and feelings some higher force is. Its like with the eating, I need to give up control cos I interfere with my own processes.
I know, I could never wish it on anyone. I know deep depression. I've felt so depressed and isolated in my early 20s of all times, that I was extremely ashamed to get help. Its horrible isn't it? Being shunned never does help but why do people shun depressed/anxious people like that? They won't catch anything!
There is something wrong with us of course. People don't believe us. But what healthy person would stay away from people shut in their room for years??
There's no point pretending that people aren't depressed, that's childish. We need to help ourselves of course but when you get put down and criticised after an attempt at socializing it's very disheartening. So we stop trying and just talk to ourselves. Don't even know what I'm missing anymore but trying anyway.
My own vent in this venting thread! But yeah I understand how it feels. Are you working right now or looking? Are you taking meds? Probably about 20 years I stopped taking meds right cocktail I had made me like a zombie had to come off them! Emotions are very important, but when they have been suppressed by people then it get's bad, some days I am getting to loathe the human race Aww some people might say you shouldn't be like this :huh: I have very right to feel like this thank you very much. But it's scary, very scary, don't trust any one really, well 2 only (and that's not family members either they don't seem to bothered). Do you ever feel like this? Exactly getting to that point where I cant be arsed any more Yes we are resilient but it doesnt last for ever. Become a hermit, have a few dogs and live in the country :) Unless we are seemed to conform to certain standards then people simply don't want to know. Yes actually I do know what iam missing some decent, genuine, good company but it's not happening sadly. And it's catching and now Iam venting too in KeeKee's thread Ahh sorry KeeKee Cheers
I'm happy people venting on here. Makes me feel less lonely.
Oh definitely as I've gotten older I've begun to really hate people haha! But I also feel compassion more and more for the victimized there are things going on I don't even know about. Looks like my egos finally shrinking!! To be honest the human condition leaves so much to be desired it's tragic. People live on hope and no one cares. They want nothing to matter so they can continue destroying their own short lives.
The way I see it most people are having a hard time and wear masks. People are just so uncomfortable feeling vulnerable so we all end up having to pretend we're alright. I used to think problems were unique to only myself. We are all different but this is not permitted. We all have to follow, like you mentioned, this very rigid standard that realistically isn't universally applicable. Instead, like it says in Futurama, you gotta do what you gotta do whether its good for you or not.
Government are watching people always. People go to work with pills keeping them zombified. They don't even know what they're doing with themselves. They are just getting used by companies their lives aren't meaningful. Some people have found their own way, the power and freedom and I'm very happy for them and would love to go that way myself. Just got unfinished business with barriers to destroy.
---------- Post added at 13:12 ---------- Previous post was at 12:52 ----------
I'm happy people venting on here. Makes me feel less lonely.
Good to hear! I love a good moan :D
Oh definitely as I've gotten older I've begun to really hate people haha! But I also feel compassion more and more for the victimized there are things going on I don't even know about. Looks like my egos finally shrinking!! To be honest the human condition leaves so much to be desired it's tragic. People live on hope and no one cares. They want nothing to matter so they can continue destroying their own short lives.
The way I see it most people are having a hard time and wear masks. People are just so uncomfortable feeling vulnerable so we all end up having to pretend we're alright. I used to think problems were unique to only myself. We are all different but this is not permitted. We all have to follow, like you mentioned, this very rigid standard that realistically isn't universally applicable. Instead, like it says in Futurama, you gotta do what you gotta do whether its good for you or not.
Government are watching people always. People go to work with pills keeping them zombified. They don't even know what they're doing with themselves. They are just getting used by companies their lives aren't meaningful. Some people have found their own way, the power and freedom and I'm very happy for them and would love to go that way myself. Just got unfinished business with barriers to destroy.
---------- Post added at 13:12 ---------- Previous post was at 12:52 ----------
Good to hear! I love a good moan :D Don't think it's age thing (for me) it's just the way I have been treated even by a ex member on here who gave me so much hope and good things to look forward to. And to some degree I too have compassion for those who are victimised but not those victims who when a life line has been thrown to them and a hand of friendship who turn it down then no I don't and Iaint apologising to those people. Guess some people have found their way in iife, wished I had though. Barriers hurdles what ever I have a lot to destroy too :) I am glad I am not alone on this too. Cheers
People hurting others and not seeking professional help is just so lame. On closer look they always have a reason to refuse help. Yeah we're never alone unless we believe it. That's what its about seeing and seeking a good example of kindness not putting others down until he or she "gets it."
Baconated grapefruit! I'm gonna go watch it now.
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