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Jasminejo
13-05-17, 02:34
hello my name is Jo

i had a panic attack at work on Easter Sunday, i had never had one before.
i asked if i could go home and my boss handled it badly asking me question after question about what was wrong with me on the shop floor in front of other employees. i got an appointment to see an out of hours GP who asked me about my job, i said i felt i had not been given adequate training on the tills and every time i used them i was worried i would get something wrong (and i often did) and that although my boss had said i could ask anyone for help the truth was everyone else was far too busy to help me leaving me with customers getting irate and my many requests for extra training were always denied. the doctor said that she thought my job was the cause of my anxiety and panic and that the sooner i left it the better. i saw my GP a few days later and he echoed her suggestion of leaving my job and gave me 1 week off. when i returned after the week i was ok for the 1st day but on the second day about an hour in i was told to go work on the tills, i went to the stock room for a moment to try to calm myself down as the mention of the tills had made me really scared. i decided to go back and ask her if i could be excused working on the tills when it was so busy and explained why but she did not care, she debated it for a bit with me (again in front of other members of staff) then took me to the office where another manager told me that there would be no amendments to my duties, he questioned why i was back off sick leave if i could not do the job. he agreed to let me work elsewhere for the moment and i went into the loos to dry my eyes, i was scared to go back out at all but i summoned the courage and went out to work. 5 mins later i was called back into the office to have the same conversation with the head boss, his ultimatum was, go on sick leave until you are cured and can do your job or else quit and he was not willing to fire me or dismiss me on medical grounds because he said he did not want to go through the disciplinary procedures he would have to do. i went back to my doctor and told him this info and he gave me a sick note for 2 weeks off. i asked if he might be wiling to give me some evidence of the fact that he thought the job was the cause of my problem so if i left i might have some chance of getting jsa till i can find another job but he refused.

and that is not the half of it. this post would be twice as long if i cited all the other things managers had done to make me feel bullied like accusing me of being late or not turning up when they had not checked the updated rotas and not apologising after for accusing me of lying. because of everything that has happened i don't feel i can go back at all, 4 managers have now told me off for being unable to do something they think i should find easy one of them said "you cant swan in here and pick and choose what you will do" and i told him i was not picking and choosing or swanning i was scared, my anxiety was awful just thinking about the tills and i was scared i might have another panic attack.
all the employees have been privy to my mental health and what the boss' think of it

i have a 4 yr. old and my partner who is a stay at home dad (looking for school time work but he has no GCSE's and no recent employment or references plus he has depression and ADHD) to look after and feed and i don't know what i can do. it has started to affect my life out of work, spending hours thinking over the same problem in my head and having conversations with my self (one sided) about it, being sick, not eating, feeling depressed, not sleeping. what can i do? I'm sure i can still work just not there and i have been applying for any job i can get and have had an interview for one and i know the right thing to do would be to try to carry on working till i can get another job but given all that has happened it is now the whole place that gives me anxiety not just the tills, knowing none of my bosses support me and i have no where to turn there if i feel unwell again

is there any chance at all that if i leave and site my reasons for leaving on the jsa form as anxiety and panic attacks caused by the job (but not backed up by my doctor) and being embarrassed by managers in front of other employees, being told to be cured or quit by my boss and that i had been doing everything i could to get another job before i felt i could no longer work there then the JSA people may see it as Just cause to leave and not sanction me?
i made an appointment to see a different GP to see if a different doctor could offer me some medical help or a note for the job centre but the earliest i could get was the 22nd and i will have to go back to work on the 19th. as my boss told me to come back cured or quit would it be a reasonable thing to ring and tell him that i am not cured and am in fact now worse and i cannot come in to work after the sick note ends but i am seeing a doctor and will let him know what the doctor says? because if he does not want me till i am cured and i am not cured then he can only allow me more time off or fire me and i don't think JSA would be able to sanction me for being fired given that i have been seeking medical help and have asked for help getting back into the job (the extra training and time away from the till i asked for) that was refused

just to make it clear i have been on JSA before and would much rather work and have no intention of staying on it any longer that is necessary. i hope that one of the jobs i am applying for will hire me and start asap and that i might not even need any JSA but i cant bet on that being the case and i really need to know how to afford to feed my family if i quit and don't get another job soon enough. has anyone else ever been in a similar circumstance? what did you do? is my boss allowed to refuse to make what i consider to be a small short term change in my duties and tell me my only option is to quit?

thank you so much for taking the time to read my mostly incoherent ramblings, any help appreciated

p.s there is no union and the HR department doesn't really exist its just a helpline that tells you to talk it through with your managers manager via an email that you have to send to them first and could take up to a week to be seen

Catherine S
13-05-17, 02:55
I think that in the absence of a doctor's letter, the job centre might not accept your word for it. So if you leave your present job and make a new claim they may consider you to have made yourself jobless, which could affect payments. If you can stick it out in your present job until you secure another position, that would probably be more beneficial to you to be honest.

ISB x

Jasminejo
13-05-17, 03:09
is there a good chance of me getting a drs letter from the other doctor do you think?
i don't know if doctors regularly refuse to write letters of if this was a one off. i think the main problem is my dr is a lovely man but he is Indian and does not always seem to understand exactly what i am saying i often have to explain my symptoms to him in different ways before he gets what i am saying when i go to him for illness.
he refused to "write a letter to say i told you to quit your job" that's what he said. i did try to tell him i was not asking for that just a letter to say the job was the likely cause of my illness but he kept saying he would not write to say he had told me to quit my job.
i was hoping that a letter saying that my job was the likely cause of my anxiety was not too much to ask but after asking him i was unsure as to whether i should ask another doctor or not or if he understood what i was asking

Catherine S
13-05-17, 03:21
Does your doctor work alone, or is it a multi doctor surgery? If it is then you might think about talking to another doctor about this. There seems to be a communication problem with your Indian doctor, but this is an important issue that needs addressing for your mental health. Is it possible to see another doctor?

ISB x

Jasminejo
13-05-17, 03:30
yes i have an appt booked to see a different doctor but it is after i am due back at work

on a side note i still have both my sick notes as i gave my boss photocopies. my sick notes say "work related stress and anxiety" as the reason for signing me off work so would my sick notes count as proof of my condition?

Catherine S
13-05-17, 03:32
Yes if a doctor has signed them, they should qualify as evidence.

ISB ☺

Jasminejo
13-05-17, 03:44
well i feel a little better now, in all the brain fog i had forgotten about my sick notes. i really don't think i can handle ever going back there again so i think i am going to have to quit and hope for the best. my only problem is i know jsa will contact my employer for their side of the story and i am worried my employer might say things to stop me claiming out of spite
:( oh well fingers crossed

Catherine S
13-05-17, 03:55
Never heard of them contacting an employer to ask questions...that'd be a bit like getting a bad reference and employers can say lots of negative things just because they can. I doubt the job centre will be interested in the opinion of a biased boss, I would've thought your doctors' notes would be sufficient to be honest...but good luck with it anyway. Let us know how it goes on.

ISB ☺ x

Jasminejo
13-05-17, 17:45
i typed a letter to the person who owns this company, my managers manager so to speak, as a last ditch effort. i don't know if it will do any good but i explained everything that had happened from day one in it and requested permission to not go back in till i have seen my doctor or else that i would be happy with a dismissal on medical grounds. i explained why just quitting was a last resort.

i have decided i will give it till Wednesday to hear back from them and if i don't then i will ring the store to say i will not be in on Friday or Sunday as i am too unwell and will let them know what is happening after i have seen this new doctor on Monday

the way i see it from here either

the store owner could be a nice person and be sympathetic and agree to dismiss me as i cant see me going back knowing 4 managers dislike me and i have now "told on them" so to speak.

my manager might not like that i will not be in work Friday and Sunday (making sure i give the correct amount of notice) and finally decide to fire me , if he wont fire me then he has no choice but to allow me more time off to get better and if he wants to have a disciplinary for my absence then i don't think he has a leg to stand on as it was him who told me to come back only if i was cured and i will have given the right amount of notice for my 2 day absence

i go see my doctor on Monday and they cant help me any more and don't give me another sick note so i quit and use my previous sick notes as evidence

i go to see my doctor and they offer me more sick leave along with medical help because of the fact that this is now starting to affect me worse and is creeping into my home life not just my work life

i go to see my doctor and they cant help me but offer a letter for JSA explaining what my condition is

so i guess this is a waiting game till Wednesday morning. i could ring to say i wont be in right now but as i have sent a letter to my managers manager i would like to hear back from them before i do anything but i wont wait longer than the 2 day notice period for absence

it still could be that i could work there if i have the support of the person who owns the company and enough time off to get medication or therapy that could help me cope with the job but i am assuming that this is the least likely outcome.

knowing how all the managers behave i cant see as the person in charge of them can be that much better i am just hoping that they realise that if i told anyone like a local MP about being questioned overly about my medical condition in front of other employees or how often i have hurt myself when boxes have been piled up too high in the stock room etc and told managers only to get a half hearted you ok? (not been told if there is an accident book and have never seen one, never been offered it when i have been hurt witch is regularly for everyone as the place is one big hazard) that they might decide to tread carefully with handling my problem as I'm assuming the person who owns the place might care more and know more about these things than the people who work there as managers

phew i guess i will keep this forum posted on my progress to help anyone else in this situation

KeeKee
13-05-17, 19:13
If your GP will keep providing sick notes could you claim ESA? If you can get a job ASAP, then you might not even need to attend an assessment. From my experience you can claim ESA for a short while with just a fit note from the GP. That may be easier than worrying about if you are going to be able to apply for JSA.

Jasminejo
13-05-17, 19:44
i thought about this but my dr thinks that it is the job that is the problem and that if i leave i would likely get much better and i would feel bad being on esa if that was the case. i would consider it if i left this job and the anxiety did not get better or got worse and i felt i would have problems going back to work anywhere

Jasminejo
17-05-17, 18:53
well i got an earlier appointment from the doctor as he had a cancelation. got more sick leave under the advice to quit, he said he could provide evidence to the job centre but it would be a £50 charge so to just use my pay slips as evidence for now. so i went in to work today and handed in my resignation and fit note to cover the period. i am happy to say i feel a little better already witch is good as when i saw the doctor and explained how i was feeling he was concerned i was starting to suffer depression as well. i will let you know how it goes with jsa if i need it

Jasminejo
13-09-17, 23:44
just an update for anyone who reads this story in future and wants to know the ending, just after i resigned from work i had a successful interview for another job. it is only 15 hours a week so it is not the best for my household income however it is 5 hr shifts 3 days a week so it eased my anxiety greatly not having to do too much. i still have a bit of residual anxiety usually when i wake up on a work day i panic about having to go but once i am in my uniform and on my way there it fades. everyone i work with is so nice too, even my superiors so as soon as i get there and everyone says hi and we start chatting i quickly feel at home. my only problem now is my lack of funds but i am hoping to get more hours at my current job or if not i will be able to take my time looking for other jobs i know i can handle. either way although i am under a bit of stress from my lowered income i am much happier as a person and my family life is much better, i hope anyone who finds themselves in the position i was in at the start of my story can get some joy out of knowing it can get better. thank you to everyone who commented on this thread. you helped me lots by being a voice i could talk to when i felt like so many others didn't or couldn't understand :bighug1:

Catherine S
14-09-17, 00:00
Hi Jasmine, thanks for the update and i'm glad you got it all sorted in the best way for your health....a positive outcome. So glad you have a job that makes you happy, despite less hours than you'd like. Happiness is what counts really In the big picture :)

Best wishes
Cath S (aka ISB) xx