EJO
17-05-17, 14:08
I am at the end of my tether. I don't think I can do this anymore. I am only 20, on my year abroad doing an internship. I have suffered a lot with health anxiety since a health scare in Christmas 2016 at the end of my Erasmus. I have done countless tests (ECGs, heart monitor, chest x-ray, blood pressure) and I have tried to accept that it is all anxiety. However, each week there is a new symptom that tests my will and starts the vicious cycle all over again. Last week it was a mid-back pain that affected the way I breathed. This week it is stomach bloating that is affecting my breathing. Tomorrow I am doing an ultrasound on my abdomen and I am overwhelmed with anxiety. I am afraid that if the test is clear it could mean that I have IBS cause a friend of mine has it and I don't think I can deal with that as well as having anxiety. I feel crippled by this. How can anxiety be so debilitating on the body? I am trying counselling, yoga, breathing techniques, healthy eating, exercise and am yet to see any change. I am afraid. I am powerless against this cruel, unjust disorder.