Maybe I was expecting too much?

[Jackrabbit]

So, I can safely say that the root of my anxiety can be attributed to several things. However, the one that I can directly point to now, is the fact that I didn't have a good stable job that I went to school for. I worked, but after just graduating college...working in a clothing store is not where I wanted to be. It took awhile, after living with my parents and A LOT of pushing, trying, and determination, I can proudly say that I found something and the offer is great. Literally, everything that Ive been wanting to happen for the last 8 months is happening! I should be over the moon thrilled, happier than ever, and whatnot. And I am happy, but I think I made a mistake in thinking that my health anxiety would just disappear. Well guess what..



It didn't.


If anything I feel a little worse now. Had a great morning, woke up still over the moon excited but as the day began to go on I started to feel that all too familiar ache. For me, my health anxiety comes in different forms and those symptoms will last for maybe a week or two and then something else will happen. Right now, its this vertigo that I can't seem to shake along with a hollowed out feeling in my chest and upper abdomen. Last week I had intense lower right belly pain that gave me nausea and bathroom problems. The last week it was something else. Also been feeling pretty fatigued and just generally uncomfortable. I feel unwell, and its starting to bother the h*ll out of me. I mean it always did, but now its REALLY bothering me because I was just hoping that this would be over and I could move on with my life. I can't let this bullsh*t rule me. I can't remember the last time I just felt "good". I know I may sound complain-y and ungrateful but I just can't shake these feelings.

Anyone else have experience with this?

Words of Advice?

[Jackrabbit]

anyone?

[I Don't Get it!]

Sorry to hear that (but congrats on the job!).

I don't think Anxiety just goes away on it's own. Your body and brain have been in the habit of thinking, feeling and behaving a certain way for a long time. It's a bit of a vicious circle, maybe?

You wake up feeling OK but your brain is unconsciously remembering all those anxious times and the slightest physical twinge (which everybody gets) could set off a reaction that leads to anxiety responses.

Or it could even be the other way round, a tiny physical blip and your brain fires off it's old familiar pathways to anxiety.

Don't try to fight it, you'll just make it worse and get more anxious. Just recognise that what you're feeling is temporary and will pass soon.

I'm a bit worried to say too much because I'm not qualified to give advice, but I've been reading a ton of self help books and having CBT therapy and what you say sounds very familiar to me.

Give yourself a big hug and be kind and patient, you've had some good days recently so you know that these thoughts and feelings aren't permanent. HTH

---------- Post added at 17:45 ---------- Previous post was at 17:36 ----------

Another thing that occurred to me is that because this job is something you've wanted for such a long time, you probably feel anxious about doing well at it and being a success. A job that you hate would probably be less of a worry in that regard. Does that make sense?

Are you very conscientious at work?

[Jackrabbit]

I am very conscientious at work! Thank you for the reply and I totally get what you are saying. I am definitely planning on taking it slow and releasing this tension day by day and with patience. I was unhappy for so long, beyond the 8 months I mentioned earlier really. And now I am happy. I think my main anxiety is, "ok this is too good to be true, something is gonna happen, I'm gonna get sick and it'll all be taken away" or something along those lines. But Im ok. And for the first time in awhile, deep down, I know that I'll be ok. Everyone goes through hard times and this was one of mine. Now time to move on to the next chapter.

Anxiety is rough, and I can feel it trying to hold on to me.

[Melonpony]

For me, anxiety came on one day over a perceived health issue, and despite being relieved of that, the anxiety has taken root and lives on.
My therapist says neural pathways were made, and now I am working on undoing them. They don't just go away on their own bc the perceived threat or issue is gone. We've created new (unhealthy) ways of thinking. Sucks, no?
The good thing is - we can undo it and create HEALTHY neural pathways to undo the anxiety ones.

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[Jackrabbit]

For me, anxiety came on one day over a perceived health issue, and despite being relieved of that, the anxiety has taken root and lives on.
My therapist says neural pathways were made, and now I am working on undoing them. They don't just go away on their own bc the perceived threat or issue is gone. We've created new (unhealthy) ways of thinking. Sucks, no?
The good thing is - we can undo it and create HEALTHY neural pathways to undo the anxiety ones.

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk

Yeah its becoming annoying because right now I feel like its more physical than mental. I'm in a good place right now but the chest and neck tension persists.

[Melonpony]

Same here. Flipping neck.

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