Guys, I am so stupid and I can't get over it.

[.Poppy.]

I'm in New Orleans with a large group for a friend's bachelorette party. I've been doing SO good keeping on budget (something that is sometimes hard for me).

I've been doing decent considering that I really hate partying and staying out late....those things and missing sleep up my anxiety. I'm also strangely homesick, even though it's only a long weekend.

Anyway, our huge group (including the bride to be's mother be aunts) got stopped by this guy who started handing out hats, eventually telling us that he was with a food for the needy program and appreciated donations. Several of us, myself included, donated.

One of my friends was just sure it was a scam...I looked it up and it turns out the group is legit but they don't authorize the street sellers because they have no idea where the money goes.

I am so embarrassed and heartsick. I mean, at least I got a hat out of it but still. I never thought of myself as so freaking stupid.

[MyNameIsTerry]

The only person in the wrong is him, Poppy. He may donate all the money (hopefully) or he may be skimming or a conman, but if he is legit it doesn't really help the charity.

What matters is that you felt compassion to help people less fortunate. It may not have payed off this time but it may do as he may be one of the many good people who just broke a rule but still did some good.

One thing you could do is inform the charity so they can investigate it. They can remind their members/volunteers and take any action with the local police.

Don't be so hard on yourself, your a lot younger than me and you will go through experiences like this where you think you've been an idiot but it's just part of life unless you live in a cave. I know I've had many :doh: moments, it's just being human.

I hope you enjoy your party. At least with strippers you know they're legit as the moneybox proves!!! :winks:

[.Poppy.]

Oh, Terry, your response made me tear up a bit. It did make me feel a bit better thanks.

If I can be honest, I hate that my friend was right. She's kind of a know it all anyway so you can tell now she's got one up. Even her boyfriend was being smug about it and he's such a jack too.

But of course you're right, we all make mistakes. I've certainly spent/wasted more money in the past ($250 on an AWFUL vet I paid to see my dog comes to mind). Love and learn I guess, despite being on the verge of tears.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I think she's jumping the gun a bit, he could be legit but just not following rules. She doesn't know which and can't prove it eitherway.

Even the really big charities say our donations can end up in the hands of terrorists abroad as they can't guarantee the food they are giving out is going to the needy or someone posing as them. We just have to trust they do the best they can, the alternative would be far worse in my opinion and cause the needy to really suffer due to our cynicism.

For all you know, 100% of those donations have gone straight to the charity and are providing much needed help for them. That's worth remembering.

Don't feel bad for being a good person.

[Hollow]

Don't be hard on yourself, it's easy to get duped these days. As you've probably seen on the news there's been a few terrorist attacks in Britain recently. As per usual a lot of "witnesses" have popped up with wild stories of bravery, and gofundme pages have been set up. A lot of well meaning but gullible members are being taken for fools.