Lidsmummy
13-06-17, 16:51
Hello everyone. I'm finding myself in a place I've never been before, not knowing what I'm going to do.
I've been having symptoms which are quite frankly, frightening me. Like some stories, I'll start at the end and then go back to the beginning.
My diagnosis is anxiety. My problem is, I simply don't believe it. I've just returned from the hospital, self admitted (eye casualty) in the hope of a kind soul who might take things further for me. I got nothing.
9 months ago, in the last 3 months of my pregnancy I started getting balls of light appearing in my peripheral vision. The disturbances were few and far between.
I was checked for hypertension/pre-eclampsia, nothing. So sent to the eye casualty to check for retinal problems. I was sent home with no fault found and none the wiser.
As the weeks went on my vision got more and more blurry and the flashes continued. I hoped after delivery they would resolve, so waited. They didn't.
6 weeks postpartum the flashes/moving balls of light became more persistent and i figured out triggers :
* Movement (standing up quickly, turning head fairly sharply, moving eyes, closing eyes, going from light to dark).
* Sneezing and coughing hard
* Getting upset (new mummy) :hugs:
* Sometimes looking into something bright (bringing my phone to my face with a white screen)
On top of this I began to see stars, different colours. And odd patches and shapes.
I admittedly got myself in a right old state and for a week convinced myself I was going to die. So much so that I paid to see a private ophthalmologist at nearly £400 including tests.
The appointment came around and I went in crying and blabbing that I thought I was going to die :blush:
The Dr went over my test results with me and said in her opinion there were no signs of any brain tumour, my visual field was 100% and no signs of raised intercrainial pressure. She suspected the vitreous in my eyes was changing more watery and causing simulation to my retina, making me think I've seen light. On top she thinks my mental state was so bad that it's made things seem much worse than they are and hopefully with a bit more rest and water I'll eventually feel better.
I went home feeling kinda better but not much. Appointment with 2 GPs later and I've been diagnosed with anxiety. I did what they said and 'forgot about it'. Next, my toes started twitching. Then soon after so did the rest of my whole body, all day. From my toes to my eyes. It's doing it now and it never ceases. Went back to the Dr who again insisted it was the anxiety. A month later and I'm still twitching everywhere. I was worried about MS, MND/ALS but both Dr's who examined me said the presentation of symptoms was just wrong and they were not even going to refer me for they think it'll make my anxiety worse. Or feed it.
The thing is, I'm actually feeling really good. I'm the happiest I've ever been with my new baby girl. But this is putting a damper on it. I went back to my Dr 2 days ago as now my joints all ache and so do my muscles. The visual disturbance is worse so my Dr suggested I just get my eyes checked again. Which is where I'm at today, once again none the wiser. No eye problems and good eyesight. The eye hospital said there was nothing more they can do for me now and if I come back it should be via referral to the outpatient department via my GP if they see it necessary... Which they won't.
Tests to date :
* 3 dilated eye examinations, eye pressure included - normal
* Glaucoma tests - normal
* Optic nerve imagery and testing, cones - normal
* Visual Field - normal
* 2 colour sensitivity tests - normal
* Diabetes test - negative
* Full blood count - normal ranges, red cells lower end
* Liver and kidney - normal
* Inflammation marker test (ESR) - above normal: range 0-19... I was 22, so the Dr said it was nothing to be worried about
* B12 - normal
* Calcium - normal
* Thyroid - normal
* Vitamin D - being checked
I keep thinking that whatever is happening to me is getting worse and the Dr's aren't taking it seriously enough and I've wasted precious time. I could have been referred to a neurologist by now but they just won't. How do I know that I've not got done horrible tumour (s) or cancer spreading causing my problems.
I don't know what to do anymore. I just don't believe it's anxiety as it's been going on for 9 months now and just getting worse.
Is it anxiety? If so why is it getting worse and why it's it so real. And why have I got it if I'm not anxious? :weep:
I've been having symptoms which are quite frankly, frightening me. Like some stories, I'll start at the end and then go back to the beginning.
My diagnosis is anxiety. My problem is, I simply don't believe it. I've just returned from the hospital, self admitted (eye casualty) in the hope of a kind soul who might take things further for me. I got nothing.
9 months ago, in the last 3 months of my pregnancy I started getting balls of light appearing in my peripheral vision. The disturbances were few and far between.
I was checked for hypertension/pre-eclampsia, nothing. So sent to the eye casualty to check for retinal problems. I was sent home with no fault found and none the wiser.
As the weeks went on my vision got more and more blurry and the flashes continued. I hoped after delivery they would resolve, so waited. They didn't.
6 weeks postpartum the flashes/moving balls of light became more persistent and i figured out triggers :
* Movement (standing up quickly, turning head fairly sharply, moving eyes, closing eyes, going from light to dark).
* Sneezing and coughing hard
* Getting upset (new mummy) :hugs:
* Sometimes looking into something bright (bringing my phone to my face with a white screen)
On top of this I began to see stars, different colours. And odd patches and shapes.
I admittedly got myself in a right old state and for a week convinced myself I was going to die. So much so that I paid to see a private ophthalmologist at nearly £400 including tests.
The appointment came around and I went in crying and blabbing that I thought I was going to die :blush:
The Dr went over my test results with me and said in her opinion there were no signs of any brain tumour, my visual field was 100% and no signs of raised intercrainial pressure. She suspected the vitreous in my eyes was changing more watery and causing simulation to my retina, making me think I've seen light. On top she thinks my mental state was so bad that it's made things seem much worse than they are and hopefully with a bit more rest and water I'll eventually feel better.
I went home feeling kinda better but not much. Appointment with 2 GPs later and I've been diagnosed with anxiety. I did what they said and 'forgot about it'. Next, my toes started twitching. Then soon after so did the rest of my whole body, all day. From my toes to my eyes. It's doing it now and it never ceases. Went back to the Dr who again insisted it was the anxiety. A month later and I'm still twitching everywhere. I was worried about MS, MND/ALS but both Dr's who examined me said the presentation of symptoms was just wrong and they were not even going to refer me for they think it'll make my anxiety worse. Or feed it.
The thing is, I'm actually feeling really good. I'm the happiest I've ever been with my new baby girl. But this is putting a damper on it. I went back to my Dr 2 days ago as now my joints all ache and so do my muscles. The visual disturbance is worse so my Dr suggested I just get my eyes checked again. Which is where I'm at today, once again none the wiser. No eye problems and good eyesight. The eye hospital said there was nothing more they can do for me now and if I come back it should be via referral to the outpatient department via my GP if they see it necessary... Which they won't.
Tests to date :
* 3 dilated eye examinations, eye pressure included - normal
* Glaucoma tests - normal
* Optic nerve imagery and testing, cones - normal
* Visual Field - normal
* 2 colour sensitivity tests - normal
* Diabetes test - negative
* Full blood count - normal ranges, red cells lower end
* Liver and kidney - normal
* Inflammation marker test (ESR) - above normal: range 0-19... I was 22, so the Dr said it was nothing to be worried about
* B12 - normal
* Calcium - normal
* Thyroid - normal
* Vitamin D - being checked
I keep thinking that whatever is happening to me is getting worse and the Dr's aren't taking it seriously enough and I've wasted precious time. I could have been referred to a neurologist by now but they just won't. How do I know that I've not got done horrible tumour (s) or cancer spreading causing my problems.
I don't know what to do anymore. I just don't believe it's anxiety as it's been going on for 9 months now and just getting worse.
Is it anxiety? If so why is it getting worse and why it's it so real. And why have I got it if I'm not anxious? :weep: