please people i need your advice , thoughts on this problem

[briannpaul]

Hi everyone i hope you're doing well , can someone please help me
i only need a good comparison or a way of thinking to get me move with my life ,a way of thinking that you could have thought of and i did not.

i've always been happy my entire life , untill when i had a panick attack about almost 3 years ago , after that i got anxious and little depressed because they were new feelings for me.Happily , i did found my way since many many months ago , i faced and solved my problems , understood how to beat the anxiety trick (total life changment and re-gained my old happy confidednt self)

The problem now is that we moved to a new house (me and my family) and it happened to be in the time where i was still traumatized and stuck in anxiety and bad feelings.The first 2 months that i lived in this NEW house , i was still in the worst part of my life. Just like a perfume that reminds someone of a bad breakup with a partner and he wants to get rid of it , same thing for me with this home.Even if had also many good moments , but THAT bad BEGINNING , i just couldnt forget it ,so i never accepted staying in this house.I explained to my parents this but they didnt accept to move from this house, and its been months since i did nothing new in my life , only waiting untill i move from here and then i start living the real life.

=> i think this way because i'm afraid and dont want to remember that the BEGINING of a NEW major event of my life took place in this house , and if i were to remember it in the future i would feel very bad

if it happened in our old house i would totaly accept it and that's because it would have happened in the middle ,not at the BEGINNING of living in the house , just like life , sometimes we fall down in life and we continue,all of that makes sense to me , my problem is because it happened at THE BEGINNING .This may seem stupid for you but it is very important and it effects me alot.

i only need a different way of thinking that would make sense to me to save me from this. Can someone help me what to do or How to think diferently about this beginning obsession ,anyway to view this thing differently ?

[ana]

It's very common to associate people and places with bad feelings of anxiety. It's as if a trauma occurs each time we panic somewhere, and then the subsequent times we visit or stay at a certain place, a kind of PTSD takes place.
It may have happened at the beginning, but there is no true 'middle' and 'end' as life has got many twists and turns... For example, who's to say you won't move somewhere else after a while (thus viewing the current place as 'the house I felt badly throughout, beginning, middle, and end'), or that you won't start feeling a lot better and have this be the house you recovered whilst staying in? What happened at the beginning may become irrelevant, if the experiences that follow are positive.

Replacing bad with good memories is the key to rewiring the way you view a place. Nothing guarantees that you'll feel well or badly, no positive or negative experience at the beginning, middle or end. Try and see life and your anxiety journey as a whole, as an ever-changing flow of life. :)

[snowghost57]

The house or any situation is not the cause of anxiety it's your thoughts! Work on those and you will feel better!

[briannpaul]

thanks both of you for your replies :) !!

---------- Post added at 02:56 ---------- Previous post was at 02:53 ----------

@ana your comparison is the kind of answers i'm looking for , thank you for that :D

---------- Post added at 03:05 ---------- Previous post was at 02:56 ----------

i hope more persons will reply with a good metaphor or comparisons , that will truely help me alot , thank you so much everyone

[nikita]

Hi. I can identify with this. When I moved into a new house a few months ago - I broke up with my partner a few days later (we didn't live together). I began to hate my new house. I hated that he had even spent a few nights there. I wished he had never been in my new place. It felt tainted. Like he had ruined my new home for me. Every time I went into the living room I remembered sitting on the couch crying with him when we broke up. Now however months later it no longer bothers me. Since then I've had new experiences and new good times in my home. These are now what I associate with it. It passes.

[briannpaul]

thank you nikita for your reply , that's what i mean too , the place feels tainted

hope i'll find a better way to view this problem