Why do we fear problems with our health?

[Worrygirl32]

So I have spent some time today thinking about why I am the way that I am, (yes I know, I have an anxiety disorder) But I really tried to dig deep within myself to figure out what is the real problem?

Do I fear death? Disability?

There are millions of people throughout the world who have chronic diseases, cancer, etc. and they are able to cope without obsessively worrying.

So I wonder why can't I do the same (why can't we do the same)?

I work in a pharmacy and I pretty much see sick people every single day. People with all kinds of diseases... and they look like ordinary people. Most of them look well-kept and successful. They don't seem to affected by whatever conditions they may have.

And then there is me... and maybe some of you guys as well...
Whenever I think there is even anything remotely wrong with me, I start to withdraw from friends and family. I look unkept. Forget about brushing my hair, shaving, doing my makeup all that goes out the window. And I feel as though I live in despair with a pity me attitude. The crazy thing is I am only 25 and I have my whole life ahead of me.

Why can't I just not care about my health? Why do I constantly feel the need to be in control of everything? Why can't I be contempt no matter the circumstances. Why do I obsess??

I know this is kind of long and some of you probably won't read this far, but for those of you that have... why do you think you fear health problems?

of course, no one wants to be sick and no one wants to die; but for the majority of people they don't worry about it. and if they do its a healthy concern, not an obsessive worry

[ShaunRyder]

I think the same thing all the time! Of course I do not want to die but I wouldn't say I am afraid of death, but then I think if I am not afraid of death then why am I worrying over getting an illness that could potentially kill me? I think for me maybe its my loved ones, friends and family having to see me ill, having to potentially lose me to a deadly illness and knowing how much it would destroy them. But I feel there is another reason for my HA but for some reason I do not know why.

Like you said about people that do have a serious illness and how they look like they are dealing with it and not affected etc. I think the fear of getting an illness is worse than getting the news you have it. If you are told you have an illness you probably get some fighting spirit, a new out look on life and how this illness will not beat you and want to fight it.

I know its completely different but for example; Last saturday I was best man at a wedding and I was so ill at the thought of standing up doing my speech, for weeks I was so scared that I would mess up and at one point and panic attack and was actually sick over it. The day came, the moment came where I had to stand infront of all those people and all that fear went, I stood up and didnt feel sick anymore and thought it wasnt actually as bad! I suppose our feelings change once actually put into that situation.

[Worrygirl32]

Exactly. Idk if you have heard that quote.. "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself" I feel like the anticipation is the worse. Or maybe it's the feeling of uncertainty. I struggle with black and white thinking. Either my health is perfect or horrible. Even though that's not the reality. There are shades of grey for everyone. I think we are pretty resilient as human beings in our ability to cope with just about anything. I feel we don't give ourselves enough credit. We underestimate ourselves and for that reason, we fear. And we fear the idea of fear. I think maybe it's not the fear of the disease, but it's the fear of having to deal with the disease.. "how will I deal it" "how will this affect me" "what does this mean" sometimes we have to put our fear on auto pilot and ride the wave. Anything that I have ever feared that came true... I didn't feel fear afterwards. I sort of just dealt with it. As best as I could.

Sometimes it's healthy to self reflect and really get a sense of understanding of how our brains are wired.

[TattooArtist]

I live in the US and fear lost time at work, financial ruin from health problems, and spending all my time in health settings. I fear these things as if they are happening, such as fearing a virus going around before I'm sick, or fearing a UTI before my period when I'm focused on symptoms. My brain manufacturers symptoms for me to fear which in the past has caused me to doubt my sanity. I fear coming off meds, like antibiotics, fearing that my infection will come back. I fear having to BE on any medication because of potential side effects. It goes on and on.

[paranoid-viking]

For me, it is the fear of death. That is the number one fear. Next, it is the fear of getting a condition that will worsen my health significantly and may eventually be a killer.

[Leslie735]

For me, it is the fear of death. That is the number one fear. Next, it is the fear of getting a condition that will worsen my health significantly and may eventually be a killer.

ME! Yes, I believe in heaven and know i"ll go there but I still fear death. Especially at a young age. I don't think Ill fear it once I reach say, 75. I think everyone wants to live a long healthy life. Who wouldn't? For for us, its even more so, I think. Also, like you said getting a condition that will take over your health. I fear that too! What kicked all this off for me, no idea.

[.Poppy.]

I'd say I fear disability more than I fear death. I'm afraid of death in that it would be hard and upsetting for my family, but being bedridden would be a far worse fate, I think.

[Worrygirl32]

These are great insightful responses. I think for me it may be more of a fear of being disabled.. Like the idea that I may get a disease that will keep me from living a life without limits. If that makes sense. I am a christian so I don't think I have an overly terrible fear of death. I think it is safe to say that most everyone has a fear of death. But I don't have an abnormal obsessive worry about it. I think for me its the idea that a sickness will keep me from really living a life without limitations.

[Temascos]

I'm scared of ending up dying at a young age, or suffering for most of my life. The feeling of powerlessness has driven me my whole life and I felt that no matter what I did, I would suffer or make a costly mistake.

I have, like many others, seen family and friends suffer due to things like strokes and dementia as well, and I absolutely do not want my last remaining years of my life simply existing to my family. When I die I want it to be peaceful and with clarity and satisfaction, if a bit of sadness. I don't want to end up dying in a manner that makes my family hate my last years of living.

[axolotl]

It's a very good question, and something I've asked myself quite a lot.

It's not that I particularly fear being ill or death. I have been very ill (I had meningitis in my teens), and I have had to face potentially dying, and I know how I react in that situation and that... well... you get on with it. Obviously I don't want to be ill or be dead! But my HA worries barely get to thinking about those two things in detail.

My worry I think comes from three places.

One is I don't think i's a coincidence that my HA has come about just as my life has become comfortable, comparatively affluent, and on a nice even keel. There is part of my mind whispering to me "all this could come tumbling down...". This doesn't seem an unusual time develop HA from what I'm reading., which is counterintuitive as you become anxious when, on paper, you have least to be anxious about - but you have more to lose than you used to.

The second fear is a creeping fear of uncertainty. What if this odd feeling is something?

The final part, which follows on from the last, is the fear of getting it wrong. I'm the only one inside my body, I'm the only person who know what I feel like. What if I'm wrong? What if I leave something too long? What if I've explained it wrong to a doctor? What if I catch something too late?

My HA to me seems to me to cover these three - my nice life is fragile, I can't be sure something's not going to come and ruin it, and I'm insecure that I'll not recognise or properly report the signs when it does. My brain rarely gets as far as imagining the details of being ill, or dying.

[Leslie735]

It's a very good question, and something I've asked myself quite a lot.

It's not that I particularly fear being ill or death. I have been very ill (I had meningitis in my teens), and I have had to face potentially dying, and I know how I react in that situation and that... well... you get on with it. Obviously I don't want to be ill or be dead! But my HA worries barely get to thinking about those two things in detail.

My worry I think comes from three places.

One is I don't think i's a coincidence that my HA has come about just as my life has become comfortable, comparatively affluent, and on a nice even keel. There is part of my mind whispering to me "all this could come tumbling down...". This doesn't seem an unusual time develop HA from what I'm reading., which is counterintuitive as you become anxious when, on paper, you have least to be anxious about - but you have more to lose than you used to.

The second fear is a creeping fear of uncertainty. What if this odd feeling is something?

The final part, which follows on from the last, is the fear of getting it wrong. I'm the only one inside my body, I'm the only person who know what I feel like. What if I'm wrong? What if I leave something too long? What if I've explained it wrong to a doctor? What if I catch something too late?

My HA to me seems to me to cover these three - my nice life is fragile, I can't be sure something's not going to come and ruin it, and I'm insecure that I'll not recognise or properly report the signs when it does. My brain rarely gets as far as imagining the details of being ill, or dying.

I think you nailed it! :hugs:

[.Poppy.]

The final part, which follows on from the last, is the fear of getting it wrong. I'm the only one inside my body, I'm the only person who know what I feel like. What if I'm wrong? What if I leave something too long? What if I've explained it wrong to a doctor? What if I catch something too late?



This feeling is absolutely me right now. I've been a little...off...and I'm pretty sure it's anxiety, but I often feel at a loss for words/too overwhelmed to feel like I'm describing it just right. Which makes it very difficult if I'm asking someone to help me.

[TattooArtist]

One of the best things I've ever heard about HA is to give yourself permission to ignore things. We spend a lot of time worrying.

[axolotl]

One of the best things I've ever heard about HA is to give yourself permission to ignore things. We spend a lot of time worrying.

Exactly. It's the realisation that you don't have to be hypervigilant, and that you don't have to be constantly vigilant for some "inevitable" deadly disease.

[Worrygirl32]

I struggle with that though. Because I feel like I have the ability to control and prevent most all diseases. So it's the need to be in control.

[snowghost57]

I don't understand HA. I'm feel terrible for people that do suffer from it. I had anxiety about the future, will I find a job, will my old car keep running etc. To me anxiety is anxiety. I found a therapist that I have worked with and she was different, through tears I asked her how can I get through this. She taught me this. At first she wanted me to write it down.

What is the situation? What are the facts? What are my thoughts, how do I feel due to these thoughts?

Is there anything I can do about the situation?

I asked her how do I stop the thoughts from the beginning. I have to challenge these thoughts. Are they productive thoughts? Are these thoughts preventing me from doing what I need to do right now? Are they helping to accomplish what I want done?

She told me that I had to retrain my brain. Even if I had to take these steps 20 times a day. It was hard to do, but I worked on it. I can now think of these steps to take when an intrusive thought tries to sneak it. Yes, I did get a job. Yes I do still have some challenges in my life, I need a car, a place to live. How will I pay off my school loans, how will I finish college? But I will work on each item when I have the time and resources to come up with a plan.

As far as my health? I eat right, I exercise when I can, if anything I park my car further away from the front door of a store. I get a my check ups and trust my doctor.

There is an old saying "cross that bridge when you get there" We can't face an imaginary problem, it's not reality.

A member posted this under their signature:

"Most humans are never fully present because unconsciously they believe that the next moment is more important then this one.
But then you miss your whole life which is never not now" Eckart Tolle.

Its true, all we have is the NOW. Tomorrow never comes, its in the now. Focus on what is in front of you, not an imaginary feeling or thought.

I have managed my anxiety without medication now for 3 months. It feels great. I still have my weak moments but I bring my mind back to what I have learned and move on to the life I have, which is right now!

[Leah88]

I'm not scared of dying but I'm scared of not existing and not seeing my husband again. So this fuels my health anxiety, not pain or suffering but just the fear of being a piece of meat in the ground.