Omegle ruins my life, please help me

[Radnaskela]

Hi everyone. I am 19 years old male from Spain. I am professional soccer player, I have good life but last few weeks I think I had anxious attacks. I am really worried about myself, so before i decide to visit psychiatrist I want to hear some of your advices. Well, I must emphasize that I am Straight male, I have girlfriend already 3.7 years and I am happy with this relationship, really. So, all begin in 2 Jan this year, sometimes when I got tired from trainings and nightlife I just came on omegle to talk with random peoples about football, magic tricks, wars, is all fun. Well, this day something gone wrong (probably...). I was few minutes on omegle but was boring and I switch to porn sites (I didn't was banned). So into xnxx popular videos I saw one guy who selfsuck his own d**. I never saw this thing before, not even mind. This time I was confused (how he can be so elastic like this? did this thing really satisfing him?) and theres begin my horrible mistake, I fkn tried to make this too, lasts only few seconds but I realized that was ****ing stupid and quit this shit. Next day, same routine I came from training and after shower I waited my girlfriend to came at me and go out with her. Until i wait on her I enter on omegle and I was damn banned there. What the hell happened? This happened first time? so everything started this moment, I ****ing realize probably I forgot omegle camera turned on (although I know that despite the fact that the light is on when camera is turned, the chances are very small), these ashame moments where I try to make gay stuffs probably was monitored there. So my brain exploded, this thing can destroy my life, I can lost my team reputation, girlfriend, career, everything. And all because one ****ing mistake what I do for under 1 minute. After this moment 2 weeks I was total confused, my score gone down, coach was worried about me because I was one of highest talents in team, but after few weeks I realize everything is ok, I was ok again. And... after 3 months, this shit again back in my mind. One of my team mates started watching me very weird, he had total strange look at me, without reason. He gone watched me every time when I saw him on trainings and matches. And I realize this shit in my mind (probably someone recorded me, posted this on internet and he saw this) I know, is overthinking, but I cannot take this minds from my head. After these months, these minds started to control me, my form again going down, I lost my road.I'm thinking of quitting football but I don't want to finish like loser because of this stupid mistake. I am sure there is no video recorded, but please help me to realize this, help me to save my life guys, thank you.

[beatroon]

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear you are experiencing such difficulties, and wanted to respond to your post to give you some support.

I'm not sure if I've got the details right but it seems like you watched some porn (a very common thing to do) and you have somehow become worried that someone else has been aware of it. This has affected your confidence and performance, and now you would like some help to deal with it. Is that about right?

I guess there are several things to say here. Firstly, there is absolutely nothing wrong with watching gay porn, either as experimentation or because you enjoy it. Many people who are heterosexual like gay porn and vice versa. It seems like you may be worried about other people finding out about the gay content - but I also want to reiterate that there is nothing at all wrong with homosexuality, and it certainly isn't 'shameful'. It sounds as though you are panicking about losing everything with absolutely no basis that would happen.

So let's consider the idea that all of this might be 'overthinking', and think about how you can fix this problem, which sounds like it is mainly anxiety. Can you talk to a therapist about this, or if you aren't ready to talk to a professional, do you have a sympathetic family member or friend you could speak to?

I am sure that this thinking will quickly die down if you can talk to someone professional about it. From what you've said, there is really nothing to worry about. I wish you all the best sorting it out!

[Phill2]

Hi everyone. I am 19 years old male from Spain. I am professional soccer player, I have good life but last few weeks I think I had anxious attacks. I am really worried about myself, so before i decide to visit psychiatrist I want to hear some of your advices. Well, I must emphasize that I am Straight male, I have girlfriend already 3.7 years and I am happy with this relationship, really. So, all begin in 2 Jan this year, sometimes when I got tired from trainings and nightlife I just came on omegle to talk with random peoples about football, magic tricks, wars, is all fun. Well, this day something gone wrong (probably...). I was few minutes on omegle but was boring and I switch to porn sites (I didn't was banned). So into xnxx popular videos I saw one guy who selfsuck his own d**. I never saw this thing before, not even mind. This time I was confused (how he can be so elastic like this? did this thing really satisfing him?) and theres begin my horrible mistake, I fkn tried to make this too, lasts only few seconds but I realized that was ****ing stupid and quit this shit. Next day, same routine I came from training and after shower I waited my girlfriend to came at me and go out with her. Until i wait on her I enter on omegle and I was damn banned there. What the hell happened? This happened first time? so everything started this moment, I ****ing realize probably I forgot omegle camera turned on (although I know that despite the fact that the light is on when camera is turned, the chances are very small), these ashame moments where I try to make gay stuffs probably was monitored there. So my brain exploded, this thing can destroy my life, I can lost my team reputation, girlfriend, career, everything. And all because one ****ing mistake what I do for under 1 minute. After this moment 2 weeks I was total confused, my score gone down, coach was worried about me because I was one of highest talents in team, but after few weeks I realize everything is ok, I was ok again. And... after 3 months, this shit again back in my mind. One of my team mates started watching me very weird, he had total strange look at me, without reason. He gone watched me every time when I saw him on trainings and matches. And I realize this shit in my mind (probably someone recorded me, posted this on internet and he saw this) I know, is overthinking, but I cannot take this minds from my head. After these months, these minds started to control me, my form again going down, I lost my road.I'm thinking of quitting football but I don't want to finish like loser because of this stupid mistake. I am sure there is no video recorded, but please help me to realize this, help me to save my life guys, thank you.

Did it work??