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JackLowe
17-07-17, 14:34
Hey there!

Just wondering if anyone has any recommendations/advice in regards to online dating? I'm 21 and have never had a relationship. In school I was always quiet and reserved (at the time I didn't know what social A. was or if I even had it), I just thought I was quiet and shy.

I know I'm still young and hopefully got the rest of my life ahead of me but as leaving the house or doing things on my own is hard-enough I was wondering if there is any good sites for people like us? I'm on some sites now and even went on Tinder but it seems like the wrong crowd to me.

I just want a soul-mate (don't we all?) who understands each other, as I think having a "safe-person" is what I need as I can do anything when I'm with people.

Hopefully that makes sense? I just kinda feel hopeless, and like I'm never going to meet someone. So in all was just looking for advice or maybe suggestions of good websites? I kinda went overboard I think with online dating but this is my first time doing it and I guess I'm tipping my toes into it.

Thanks!

Fishmanpa
17-07-17, 15:41
I met my wife on Plenty of Fish. My daughter met her boyfriend on OkCupid. There are so many out there (including smart phone apps) and many that are more specialized to personal preferences.

All I can say from experience is be up front and take your time...

Positive thoughts

HalfJack
20-07-17, 05:55
You'll probably have to kiss a few frogs before you find a soulmate, but I know what you mean about tindr and stuff! Feels a bit full on doesn't it? I couldn't go for that stuff either when I was single.

A gamer bar local to me does "geek dating' nights. That might not be relevant to you but for people into video games its a great way to meet like minded people! Doing things like that can be good :)

Lots of free dating sites, some people on there don't want relationships but you'll be able to see that on their profile.
The Guardian has their own dating thing, I've not used it personally but a few of my friends have and they said it was really friendly and nice.

Good luck :)

JackLowe
21-07-17, 00:18
You'll probably have to kiss a few frogs before you find a soulmate, but I know what you mean about tindr and stuff! Feels a bit full on doesn't it? I couldn't go for that stuff either when I was single.

A gamer bar local to me does "geek dating' nights. That might not be relevant to you but for people into video games its a great way to meet like minded people! Doing things like that can be good :)

Lots of free dating sites, some people on there don't want relationships but you'll be able to see that on their profile.
The Guardian has their own dating thing, I've not used it personally but a few of my friends have and they said it was really friendly and nice.

Good luck :)

Haha yeah Tinder has certainly been interesting but definitely isn't for me! A gamer bar? Knowing my luck thats miles away from me, I've never heard of that sort of thing but I'm a huge geek/gamer myself. Goddammit! haha

The Guardian one I didn't think there would be many on it but I will have to give it a try now it's been mentioned!

HalfJack
30-07-17, 19:18
Yep me too! I'm Nottingham, we have a lot of gamer stuff here. Lots of pubs with fun stuff like boardgames or ps1s. No idea why, I've not lived here that long but its awesome!
I love your signature! Limited edition indeed!

HappyBread
01-08-17, 15:57
I just want a soul-mate (don't we all?) who understands each other, as I think having a "safe-person" is what I need as I can do anything when I'm with people.

Hopefully that makes sense? I just kinda feel hopeless, and like I'm never going to meet someone. So in all was just looking for advice or maybe suggestions of good websites? I kinda went overboard I think with online dating but this is my first time doing it and I guess I'm tipping my toes into it.

Thanks!

Does it have to be online dating? How about a classmate or a colleague at work? ;-)

Here's the thing, in my opinion, it's best to not limit yourself to just online dating if you want to find a life partner.

It'll shorten the selection process if you cast your net wider as you catch more "Fishes" to choose from since the likelihood of catching "The One" is definitely higher than just going at it in a single medium lol.

Gotta take note though- if your reason to choose only online dating is because you're "Shy" or afraid to approach women etc then I really want you to think about this-

If you are shy in approaching and talking to women in the first place- Will it be different if you are going to be meeting up with the person you met online?

Would your anxiety kick in as well and make you ruin the whole date too? Maybe. Who knows? Lol. But one thing is for sure-

If you got anxiety issues, you gotta make sure you address it first before looking to "Score" otherwise, you'll just be disappointed and be more depressed in life as you keep "Failing" and don't realize that you've been setting yourself up to fail by ignoring what's important- Your anxiety issue.

HOWEVER, if that's not the case for you and you just want to do online dating cause it's fun or something? Ayeee knock yourself out XD

Also, do your research. If you want a girl who's more of the studious type, hang out in the library and meet them ;-)

If you aren't sure how to talk to somebody new? Learn. I'd be happy to share some tips with ya!


All I can say from experience is be up front and take your time...

Positive thoughts

Aye, this is one solid advice. It will take time for sure XD

Regards to your family!!

lifeisabullet89
02-08-17, 15:55
Hi Jack Lowe,
sorry to hear you're struggling with the whole dating situation. I my self am also struggling to find someone, so I can relate to your situation. Unfortunately I cannot suggest a suitable dating site catering to people with anxiety.
Although I will say this about online dating it can be both a blessing and a curse, depending on how you deal with the whole experience. I've found in the 4 years I've been on the dating site POF, I've had quite a few dates. However I've also had to deal with a lot of rejection due to girls ignoring my messages, or getting bored of talking to me.
That said I've met some nice people off that site, who I otherwise wouldn't have been able to meet offline. So I'll say this...online dating is definitely worth sticking at, just be prepared that you might get messed around and/or rejected but if it helps to give you a chance at meeting that special someone, you should go for it. Once you've conversed with a someone online, you'll have a lot to talk about with them if/when you meet them face to face, as you'll know their interests, what there job is, if they're in education etc.
That's a lot easier than walking up to someone in a bar and trying to ask for their number, or if they would like a drink etc (in my opinion).

Sorry for the essay but good luck with your dating experience, and as these guys have said avoid Tinder, it's terrible as there's too many narcissistic individuals looking for one thing.

Nathan

MariosK39
20-09-17, 14:55
Hey there!

Just wondering if anyone has any recommendations/advice in regards to online dating? I'm 21 and have never had a relationship. In school I was always quiet and reserved (at the time I didn't know what social A. was or if I even had it), I just thought I was quiet and shy.

I know I'm still young and hopefully got the rest of my life ahead of me but as leaving the house or doing things on my own is hard-enough I was wondering if there is any good sites for people like us? I'm on some sites now and even went on Tinder but it seems like the wrong crowd to me.

I just want a soul-mate (don't we all?) who understands each other, as I think having a "safe-person" is what I need as I can do anything when I'm with people.

Hopefully that makes sense? I just kinda feel hopeless, and like I'm never going to meet someone. So in all was just looking for advice or maybe suggestions of good websites? I kinda went overboard I think with online dating but this is my first time doing it and I guess I'm tipping my toes into it.

Thanks!

I recommend you google INTJ forums. :)