sportboy
19-07-17, 00:31
Hi.
So, life has been great so far.
Health anxiety was gone for a long time, only hit-and-run ocd and contamination ocd were still in my mind. However, last 10 days have been like hell for me.
I was at my girlfriend's house and played with her dog and cat, later we went to an outdoor event. I remember how my driving ocd bothered me a little bit, but nothing bad. Next morning I woke up, ate breakfast and then I looked my hangnail wound and thought it would be good idea to google about rabies and wounds.
I have proof in browser history... "scratch dog salvia rabies", "hangnail wound". Okay, I decided to ask my girlfriend and she told me that her animals are vaccinated. Also I found out that animals can be monitored for 10 days, if they are still alive, then no rabies.
Second day I have these phrases in my history "mosquito bite dog licked rabies". This was the moment when I didn't care about my hangnail wound and thought that may be stray dog licked my mosquito bite on my other hand. Then I asked my girlfriend who was holding my hand all the time and she told me that there were no animals.
Okay, anxiety went down.... BUT third day after my first thought I googled these phrases "would I feel bat bite", "bat bite pictures". It was three days after that hangnail wound idea. And of course I found possible bat bite, it is my mosquito bite, that I scratched so much during this outdoor event. Problem is that I found another old wound below the mosquito bite, 1,5 cm is space between them.
This is the point when things went crazy. For last 10 days I have been thinking 24/7 how a bat bite me when I was at this outdoor event with like 500 people. I got that idea when I googled about rabies and that bats are main rabies risk in US. Actually I don't live in US and my country is rabies free, but still.
Neither me or my girlfriend saw a bat, rabies idea was actually from a hangnail wound and her dog. I remember how I scratched my mosquito bite. Also bats in my country are tiny, like 8 cm in lenght max. So they can't leave bite marks 1,5 cm apart.
But now I just can't get it out of my head. It gets better sometimes, like now when I type all the facts here. But then it starts all over. Deep down I know that everything is fine, I know the story and facts, but still this idea is like endless cycle in my head.
I really don't know what to do. It feels like depression starts to take over, I just can't calm down.
Also, here is the picture of my hand. You have to copy the link and delete one extra space, I don't have 10 posts to post a link.
"htt p://imgur.com/a/50xYJ"
I took the picture 2 days after the outdoor event.
So, life has been great so far.
Health anxiety was gone for a long time, only hit-and-run ocd and contamination ocd were still in my mind. However, last 10 days have been like hell for me.
I was at my girlfriend's house and played with her dog and cat, later we went to an outdoor event. I remember how my driving ocd bothered me a little bit, but nothing bad. Next morning I woke up, ate breakfast and then I looked my hangnail wound and thought it would be good idea to google about rabies and wounds.
I have proof in browser history... "scratch dog salvia rabies", "hangnail wound". Okay, I decided to ask my girlfriend and she told me that her animals are vaccinated. Also I found out that animals can be monitored for 10 days, if they are still alive, then no rabies.
Second day I have these phrases in my history "mosquito bite dog licked rabies". This was the moment when I didn't care about my hangnail wound and thought that may be stray dog licked my mosquito bite on my other hand. Then I asked my girlfriend who was holding my hand all the time and she told me that there were no animals.
Okay, anxiety went down.... BUT third day after my first thought I googled these phrases "would I feel bat bite", "bat bite pictures". It was three days after that hangnail wound idea. And of course I found possible bat bite, it is my mosquito bite, that I scratched so much during this outdoor event. Problem is that I found another old wound below the mosquito bite, 1,5 cm is space between them.
This is the point when things went crazy. For last 10 days I have been thinking 24/7 how a bat bite me when I was at this outdoor event with like 500 people. I got that idea when I googled about rabies and that bats are main rabies risk in US. Actually I don't live in US and my country is rabies free, but still.
Neither me or my girlfriend saw a bat, rabies idea was actually from a hangnail wound and her dog. I remember how I scratched my mosquito bite. Also bats in my country are tiny, like 8 cm in lenght max. So they can't leave bite marks 1,5 cm apart.
But now I just can't get it out of my head. It gets better sometimes, like now when I type all the facts here. But then it starts all over. Deep down I know that everything is fine, I know the story and facts, but still this idea is like endless cycle in my head.
I really don't know what to do. It feels like depression starts to take over, I just can't calm down.
Also, here is the picture of my hand. You have to copy the link and delete one extra space, I don't have 10 posts to post a link.
"htt p://imgur.com/a/50xYJ"
I took the picture 2 days after the outdoor event.