Crouton
26-07-17, 06:16
Hi all,
I've been a long time lurker of this forum and have gained much from it in terms of putting my anxious mind and body at ease. I'd like to give something back in the form of a little story and a humble bit of advice from someone who has tackled with health anxiety for some years.
I'm a generally anxious person at heart, but nothing drops me deeper into a pit of despair like a health scare. It's not a nice place to be, as I'm sure many of you here can relate; I'll start catastrophizing. I'll start researching symptoms and contemplating the worse. I'll lead myself to believe that I have the worst prognosis, and that I'm one of the unlucky ones who gets the rare disease. My physical symptoms will worsen, I'll experience weakness and fatigue, palpitations, tremors, diarrhoea, cold sweats, pins and needles, chest tightness, blurry vision, headaches, you name it. I'll shape these symptoms in my mind into something that I fear, because that's just how irrational my health anxiety is.
It will break me. I will lose days on end to incessant worrying and despair. My relationships will start to show signs of strain. I'll see doctor after doctor and still not be satisfied with what they tell me, always seeking a second opinion because in my mind I am convinced there is something gravely wrong with me. It's almost as though I want someone to tell me I've got what I think I have and give me some sort of weird, disturbed closure.
I'm currently in the final year of my medical degree. It's been a long and tumultuous journey, in most part because of the recurrent health anxiety. If you think googling symptoms is bad, try reading medical textbook after medical textbook about all the weird and wonderful diseases and disorders you could possible have for any given symptom! But please don't, because I can tell you from experience that there is nothing to gain from self-diagnosis. Medical students and doctors do it all the time, and that's with a background knowledge of the subject. We claim to know our bodies, but in reality we do not. We as a species are still in awe of the mystery of the human brain and the complex relationship it shares with the body. If we think hard enough about a symptom, our mind will do its best to make it feel real.
I have seen very sick patients with horrible illnesses. On the other hand I have seen healthy patients who think they are very sick. The big difference is that patients in the healthy group always have some degree of anxiety, sometimes severe. For me this was eye opening. I had spent so much time worrying about my heart, my kidneys, my brain (the list goes on) that I had neglected to see that anxiety had been crippling me from the inside. I recall on one occasion literally laughing at the suggestion I should see a psychologist about it. To me at that point there was a big barrier between my physical self and mental self.
I began to see the anxiety for what it was. I started trying to think rationally. I started visiting this forum, which made me realize I wasn't alone. I spoke to my girlfriend about it. Putting it to spoken words was hard, but doing so helped me understand how irrational my fears were.
I believe that fighting anxiety is not as simple as 'snapping out of it'. There are days where I feel great and worry-free, but then there are others where I crumble from the inside out and slip back into the rabbit-hole. Everyone has good days and bad days, the important thing for me was to be open about it, surround myself with the things I love, and live in the present.
tl;dr Here's some tips and tricks from a chronic worrier who has spent some time in the medical world.
1. If you're worried, let it be heard. Don't suffer in silence. Come to this forum, speak to friends, speak to family, but above all else, go and see your PCP / GP. There is so much to gain from expressing and acknowledging feelings.
2. Please don't be afraid of doctors, they're job is to look after those who suffer, be it physically or mentally. If you had a bad experience with a doctor previously, please do not let it put you off. You PCP / GP should be your first port of call for your health worries.
3. If your doctor has given you the all clear, hooray! Put that worry in a box, tape it up, and burn it. Please trust your doctor. They are trained to cover all bases, and will investigate if necessary. Don't go looking for a second opinion. The more you look, the more likely you are to have unnecessary investigations that are causing more harm than good.
4. I'm sure you all know to steer well clear from Dr. Google (I've yet to see his credentials!). My advice is to steer even clearer of medical journals and case studies. If you search long enough, you will find something you wish you didn't read. You don't get any context from this, and it is only going to make the temptation to self-diagnose much greater.
5. "When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses not zebras." In other words, common things occur commonly. Anxiety is common, cancer is not. The same applies for heart disease, lung disease, kidney disease, liver disease, neurodegenerative disorders, and so on.
6. Take a deep breath. Take several. Focus on the rise and fall of your chest. Distract your mind. Get out and exercise, and do it regularly. Your heart isn't going to explode. Find ways to fill your day that put your mind to better use than worrying. Easier said than done, I know.
7. Finally, please take your health anxiety seriously. Ignoring it may help in the short term, but it will find other ways to manifest. Communicate it with people close to you in your life. I'm not talking about telling them all your symptoms, but rather having a conversation about your anxiety, it's effect on you and what your goals are to get on top of it. Don't focus on your physical symptoms, but on your anxiety as a whole. Tackle that first, and you may be surprised how much better you feel.
I really do hope this helps. Writing it was certainly therapeutic for me! :yesyes:
I've been a long time lurker of this forum and have gained much from it in terms of putting my anxious mind and body at ease. I'd like to give something back in the form of a little story and a humble bit of advice from someone who has tackled with health anxiety for some years.
I'm a generally anxious person at heart, but nothing drops me deeper into a pit of despair like a health scare. It's not a nice place to be, as I'm sure many of you here can relate; I'll start catastrophizing. I'll start researching symptoms and contemplating the worse. I'll lead myself to believe that I have the worst prognosis, and that I'm one of the unlucky ones who gets the rare disease. My physical symptoms will worsen, I'll experience weakness and fatigue, palpitations, tremors, diarrhoea, cold sweats, pins and needles, chest tightness, blurry vision, headaches, you name it. I'll shape these symptoms in my mind into something that I fear, because that's just how irrational my health anxiety is.
It will break me. I will lose days on end to incessant worrying and despair. My relationships will start to show signs of strain. I'll see doctor after doctor and still not be satisfied with what they tell me, always seeking a second opinion because in my mind I am convinced there is something gravely wrong with me. It's almost as though I want someone to tell me I've got what I think I have and give me some sort of weird, disturbed closure.
I'm currently in the final year of my medical degree. It's been a long and tumultuous journey, in most part because of the recurrent health anxiety. If you think googling symptoms is bad, try reading medical textbook after medical textbook about all the weird and wonderful diseases and disorders you could possible have for any given symptom! But please don't, because I can tell you from experience that there is nothing to gain from self-diagnosis. Medical students and doctors do it all the time, and that's with a background knowledge of the subject. We claim to know our bodies, but in reality we do not. We as a species are still in awe of the mystery of the human brain and the complex relationship it shares with the body. If we think hard enough about a symptom, our mind will do its best to make it feel real.
I have seen very sick patients with horrible illnesses. On the other hand I have seen healthy patients who think they are very sick. The big difference is that patients in the healthy group always have some degree of anxiety, sometimes severe. For me this was eye opening. I had spent so much time worrying about my heart, my kidneys, my brain (the list goes on) that I had neglected to see that anxiety had been crippling me from the inside. I recall on one occasion literally laughing at the suggestion I should see a psychologist about it. To me at that point there was a big barrier between my physical self and mental self.
I began to see the anxiety for what it was. I started trying to think rationally. I started visiting this forum, which made me realize I wasn't alone. I spoke to my girlfriend about it. Putting it to spoken words was hard, but doing so helped me understand how irrational my fears were.
I believe that fighting anxiety is not as simple as 'snapping out of it'. There are days where I feel great and worry-free, but then there are others where I crumble from the inside out and slip back into the rabbit-hole. Everyone has good days and bad days, the important thing for me was to be open about it, surround myself with the things I love, and live in the present.
tl;dr Here's some tips and tricks from a chronic worrier who has spent some time in the medical world.
1. If you're worried, let it be heard. Don't suffer in silence. Come to this forum, speak to friends, speak to family, but above all else, go and see your PCP / GP. There is so much to gain from expressing and acknowledging feelings.
2. Please don't be afraid of doctors, they're job is to look after those who suffer, be it physically or mentally. If you had a bad experience with a doctor previously, please do not let it put you off. You PCP / GP should be your first port of call for your health worries.
3. If your doctor has given you the all clear, hooray! Put that worry in a box, tape it up, and burn it. Please trust your doctor. They are trained to cover all bases, and will investigate if necessary. Don't go looking for a second opinion. The more you look, the more likely you are to have unnecessary investigations that are causing more harm than good.
4. I'm sure you all know to steer well clear from Dr. Google (I've yet to see his credentials!). My advice is to steer even clearer of medical journals and case studies. If you search long enough, you will find something you wish you didn't read. You don't get any context from this, and it is only going to make the temptation to self-diagnose much greater.
5. "When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses not zebras." In other words, common things occur commonly. Anxiety is common, cancer is not. The same applies for heart disease, lung disease, kidney disease, liver disease, neurodegenerative disorders, and so on.
6. Take a deep breath. Take several. Focus on the rise and fall of your chest. Distract your mind. Get out and exercise, and do it regularly. Your heart isn't going to explode. Find ways to fill your day that put your mind to better use than worrying. Easier said than done, I know.
7. Finally, please take your health anxiety seriously. Ignoring it may help in the short term, but it will find other ways to manifest. Communicate it with people close to you in your life. I'm not talking about telling them all your symptoms, but rather having a conversation about your anxiety, it's effect on you and what your goals are to get on top of it. Don't focus on your physical symptoms, but on your anxiety as a whole. Tackle that first, and you may be surprised how much better you feel.
I really do hope this helps. Writing it was certainly therapeutic for me! :yesyes: