Lost all fight!

[MichelleL]

Hello, I was diagnosed with GAD in 2009. I was put on medication and everything was good. Until about 6 months ago! I am just losing everything right now! My mum and dad got me to see the private psychiatrist who diagnosed it and he's said I am now on the severe side! I was admitted to The Priory hospital for 7 days about 2 months ago, I have Depression, OCD, Panic Attacks and now Insomnia too!!

While I was in hospital I was put on 100mg of Oxazapam (all I did really was sleep) I have lost all my appetite (I'm type 2 diabetic as well)

I have been suicidal in the last 3 months so much so I nearly took an overdose but rang my mum hysterically.

I've been to my GP, he did a referral to the local crisis team who were coming out everyday to see me at home for about 8 days then it went to every other day and then I was discharged from them last Thursday.

Sleep!! I have been tried on 6 different sleeping tablets, they all work for like the first/second night then tail off!!
Monday night was the first night in 6 months I slept without waking through the night. Normally I go to bed around 10pm, wake at 11.30pm, go back to sleep for 1.5-2 hours and this goes on all night every night!! For over 6 months!!!

I admitted to my mum today that I just feel like giving up, I have no fight left in me anymore and I'm so exhausted!! (Not suicidal)
My brain just wants so much energy that my body just doesn't have anymore. It's stripped me of my identity and I don't know who I am anymore.

I just don't know how much longer I can cope with all this!!!!


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[Phuzella]

I'm not a doctor or anything but have you looked into your diet?

[MichelleL]

I'm not a doctor or anything but have you looked into your diet?



Yes, everything like this has been looked at


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[Montyzoo]

What a tough time you're having! Sending you a big hug!

[MichelleL]

What a tough time you're having! Sending you a big hug!



Thanks Montyzoo! It certainly hasn't been easy!

But I did an experiment last night! I didn't take a sleeping tablet (could have been a bad idea) but I can't believe it!!
I went to bed last night at 10pm, I did wake through the night but only through tossing and turning! Woke at 5:30am was up for about 15 minutes, went back to bed and slept until 9am!!!

I woke up to no 'hangover effect' it was like a breath of fresh air!!

I will now only have the sleeping tablets as a pure last resort.

I can now concentrate on my debilitating anxiety and depression!

Yes, sleeping tablets are helpful but I'm now starting to think they were actually hindering me rather than helping.


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[Montyzoo]

That's awesome!

I agree sleeping pills aren't the answer. I was prescribed them a number of years ago when I was in a horrible mess. They helped but they're not good in the long term.

What helps me to get a good night's sleep is making sure I get some exercise each day. Gardening or a longish walk or anything. Afterwards I feel tired but sort of refreshed at the same time - and pleased with myself for my efforts!