View Full Version : How does your other half deal with your anxiety?
Just curious as to how other peoples husbands/wife's cope? My husband dismisses it. Tells me to 'just stop' and get annoyed at it and it really winds me up as I can't ball it. I'm in therapy and I'm trying but in the bad days I just get told to 'not think about it' and its really starting to annoy me. It's not like I asked to be like this, it's just something I'm trying to deal with? Does anyone else's partner get fed up/not really give a crap?
Terribly! NOt understanding at all.
Then, when there is something semi-legitimate to deal with-wise, he gets combative and questions my choices.
I get it that he didn't sign up for this and it negatively impacts him. At the same time, it makes me feel like he is NOT in my corner and won't be there for me if the shit ever really its the fan. I have a tumor in my foot in the preliminary stages of getting investigated (was possibly misdiagnosed once already)....and, I really fear what's going to happen if I get bad news. He is so sick of me jumping to the worst and getting sad that I feel like he will expect me to not feel any sadness or fear and that he will just bog me down.
Really hoping I don't get bad news but, yes, I've even catastrophized to the level of my marriage breaking up, ugh.
Isn't it the worst feeling in the world when the person you love most doesn't seem to care. I see a therapist. I take on everyone else's problems and listen and not one person I knkwnwants to listen to me rant. It comes to something when you haft to pay somebody to listen when you're concerned doesn't it!
ServerError
03-08-17, 00:09
I don't have one... :weep:
Thelegend27
03-08-17, 00:11
She doesn't bring it up often, she will peak over my shoulder while on my phone to make sure I'm not googling some thing health related, but other than that she lets it slide until I want to talk about it, she knows its a sensitive subject and that I don't really know what to do at this point so she doesn't push me.
Isn't it the worst feeling in the world when the person you love most doesn't seem to care. I see a therapist. I take on everyone else's problems and listen and not one person I knkwnwants to listen to me rant. It comes to something when you haft to pay somebody to listen when you're concerned doesn't it!
Yes, it sure does. When I've told him, it feels like you don't care about me, he is surprised. I think he really, honestly just doesn't think anything bad can happen to me and that he doesn't worry in advance.
But, then if an issue arises, he gets mad and argumentative about it and can't hide judgment. Or else he ignores me and gives me my distance. It's a huge burden to carry all of this in secret when your partner should just hold you and say it's going to be alright.
I do try to remind myself that this is very hard for him b/c otherwise we are good.
My partner has been great, she has never once made me feel that my anxiety puts a strain on things and never criticized it. We've been together for 12 1/2 years and I've suffered badly with anxiety for 11 1/2 of them. It's cost us a lot and I can honestly say it's never been a problem to her.
My fiance has his days, it kind of depends on HOW irrational my fears are. For the most part he is pretty understanding. We make jokes about how crazy I can be sometimes and it helps lol. If I'm being super ridiculous he does get annoyed sometimes. But we work through it pretty well. Its not something that I worry would make/break our relationship.
I couldn't have asked for a more supportive partner. But there were times during my 3 years of having HA that my husband reached the end of his patience. Mainly though he just missed the person I used to be. I missed the person I used to be, so I understood. Maybe in some cases (not all) a partner becomes fed up because he or she feels like the person they love has disappeared.
Mine is also very dismissive and gets annoyed about it. It's hard because he hates the fact that I go on and on about stuff, which I do understand as he doesn't see the point in taking about something that we've talked about already but for me this is on my mind 24/7 so it's very hard not to be able to share my feelings about it. I find it very isolating. Luckily I have friends who are more understanding.
My wife has always been a big help she ia a very outgoing type of person and does not understand why I get so worked up but has never complained or tried to put me down.
We have been married for 46 years and I have had anxiety all that time starting with SA and developing to GAD having mamy panic attacks,she is always there to help and explain to others who see it for the first time.
I am very very lucky that I have never had HA maybe she would feel different about that.
My boyfriend (ex) recently dumped me after 2 years. Understandably it had gotten pretty bad.
He always tries to explain to me with logic on why i should stop worrying about this/being ridiculous and tells me that I/it will be ok. He's my biggest support with everything.
My spouse is quite unkind about it and definitely not supportive.
So it would seem quite a few people are in the same situation. Glad it's not just mine that's getting annoyed with me haha
unsure_about_this
05-08-17, 10:20
I dont have one, I have a disability, health condition so the only person I been close to having a relationship was on holiday (one of the hotel entertainers) when she asked me could she marry me within 5 minutes of seeing me.
My parents dont understand fully, but I think my mum is slowly getting it as my cousin he has anxiety, some of my Nans neighbours have anxiety, My Dad gets on with it, it causes friction in the house between my parents.
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