View Full Version : Reposting Need Reassurance Please :(
Please excuse my empty post from earlier today, I was having trouble posting and loading he site.
This is long. Please bear with me! I am 5, almost 6 weeks postpartum. I had my baby at the end of June. About 1.5 weeks before I had him, I was making dinner one night and had a big heart palpitation and everything went blurry like I was about to pass out. My OB told me to go to the ER where they did an EKG and bloodwork. They said everything was fine and sent me home. I kept having palpitations and ended up self-diagnosing anemia after I looked at the hospitals portal and saw my blood test results. I had crushing fatigue, insane ice cravings, shortness of breath, and the heart palps. I was induced with my baby but ended up needing a c-section because his heart rate kept dropping (it was very traumatic).
The next morning in the hospital they then told me I was anemic and brought me iron and folic acid to take. I was discharged with those and have been taking them ever since. Recovery from the c-section was really rough on me. But just as I started to feel better and more myself, around 4 weeks ago, I started having this chest pressure but it was only when I was up and moving around. This started giving me anxiety and I eventually landed in my GPs office. She thought for sure it was the anemia and did bloodwork again. I left feeling better that she was sure it was the anemia until my bloodwork came back and she called to say it was all back to normal, my blood and iron levels.
This gave me even MORE anxiety because I felt peace when anemia was the cause knowing I just had to keep taking my supplements. They have scheduled an echocardiogram for tomorrow and a holter monitor next week. I was terrified of a condition I found while googling called peripartum cardiomyopathy that postpartum women can get up to 5 months postpartum. I don't have any symptoms besides the shortness of breath, heart palpitations, and chest pressure. I would supposedly also have swelling and not be able to breath, especially lying down.
This chest pressure changes from pressure to sometimes pain. Never a terrible pain or pressure. Just like someone is pushing back against me. I've noticed some nights in bed when I lie on my side I feel a lot of pressure and/or pain. Right now I feel like my lungs are irritated or something. Like the very beginning of a cold but I've been feeling that for a while so it can't be a cold. I'm not coughing or anything but it almost makes me feel like I need to.
I'm terrified that I'm going to die and leave my babies behind. I have a 3 year old and the almost 6 week old. I'm breastfeeding so I sit and daydream about how if I die or end up in the hospital, he will have to get formula because I won't be able to feed him. I'm spending all my time googling which I know is terrible. I have been battling HA for a very long time with really good long periods where I was fine. But now, I'm at my wits end thinking I have lung cancer, a blood clot, a heart problem...something horrible and sinister. If anyone can help with some reassurance that would be great 😢
Postpartum SUCKS for health anxiety and anxiety in general. I'm so Sorry you're going through this!
My feeling is that you have postpartum anxiety, but I'm really glad they are being diligent with you. If you have a heart issue - Which I do not think you have- they will find It!
Hang in there, mama. Google is the worst thing for us.
If you have to Google symptoms, ALWAYS put "nomorepanic" after the list or symptom. It's how I semi cured my HA.
Next week are your tests. You just need to get through this week. YOU CAN DO IT and please keep posting or commenting if you need to. I'll keep replying to help.
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Thanks for replying! Actually my echocardiogram is tomorrow afternoon! I am super nervous about it that they will just tell me on the spot that I'm dying or maybe the ultrasound technician will go get a doctor to come tell me I'm dying. Or maybe I will leave and then my GPs office will call and say I need to come in to go over the results...normally they don't do that unless something is wrong. Very scared. Even if the echo comes up fine, I will still be worried about my chest/lungs. They haven't ordered a chest x-ray yet but I intend to ask for one.
I caved and took an Ativan 8 hours ago. I took one the other day...my first in a long time since I was pregnant. They are only .5 mg pills but holy heck did I feel looped! So I cut hem all in half and today I took .25 mg. It felt like the perfect dose. I was having a lot of fluttering in my chest and panicking and it made that part go away. I actually got off the couch and made dinner! But by now, 8 hours later, i'm fluttery and panicky again. I don't want to take anymore then need be with breastfeeding. Bed soon so that will be good. Thanks for letting me vent! I so so appreciate it! I was doing a lot of deep breaths tonight trying to see if there is a slight rattle in my lungs and then they feel irritated. Ugh.
Oh great news that it's tomorrow!!!!!
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---------- Post added at 05:14 ---------- Previous post was at 05:13 ----------
I'm glad you took an ativan, and it made the fluttering go away. That tells me it's anxiety, honestly.
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---------- Post added at 05:15 ---------- Previous post was at 05:14 ----------
Also glad you will request a chest xray for your lungs. I don't think anything is wrong, but just to cover your bases and get that reassurance.
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Hello Girlrock, just wanted to write you a quick reply... I'm coming out of a terrible phase of PND, Health Anxiety following the birth of my little son 6 months ago. When I read your post it brought a lot back home. I too had some health complications following the birth and this is what triggered the anxiety. Just like you, days, hours spent by myself at home feeding my baby, checking google for everything and having awful visions of dying and leaving him.
I just wanted to say to you, hang in there, having a baby brings out all kinds of very deep emotions, couple that with hormones, lack of sleep, and any health problems... you're going to end up anxious.
You're being followed for your health issues but are you getting any help for your anxiety? I waited too long (about 3 months, literally let it get to the point where I felt I was having a breakdown to reach out), I have been seeing a psychologist, stopped googling and reading a couple of books on intrusive thoughts... It's still there but I am sooooo much better than I was 3 months ago...
If you want to chat, please feel free to private message me.
Good luck and don't worry, you're not alone :)
Hugs
Sx
Thank you samina! I've been seeing a therapist for over a year because my HA kicked into high gear after my dad passed from pancreatic cancer in october of 2015. She would like to see me on an SSRI but I'm so afraid to gain weight again like I did on Paxil. It's hard to decide if I want to feel mentally well or be fat again! I know that sounds crazy but especially after just having a baby the last thing I want to do is gain weight. I have been taking occasional Ativan.
I'm headed out now for my echo. Very scared and nervous. ��
Keep us posted PLEASE! Good luck!
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I took a .25 mg Ativan before my appointment to get me through. I ended up with a sweet older woman who kept talking to me about my kids and her grandkids. So it went fast. She didn't seem concerned at any point and told me the doctor would read it today and then send it to my regular doctor's office. I'm assuming I'll be getting a phone call sometime tomorrow! Scary!
Oh I'm glad it was fast and easy!!!
Thank you for the update. That's really reassuring that they didn't want to discuss it immediately. Now The wait for the phone call!
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Hi Girlrock!
You're welcome, anytime! I love this forum because lots of like-minded individuals and people who have felt EXACTLY what you have, can reassure you that you are not alone :)
My psychologist hasn't mentioned putting me on anything and I haven't asked but that's my case. All I can say is this, I used to have a lot of hang ups about my body and physical image in general but since I had my health problems, I'd trade my looks any day for being healthy and 100% fit for my baby.
Glad your visit went well and hooray for healthcare professionals who are human and understand that people need to feel relaxed :) Good luck with the phonecall, I'm sure you're great. Keep us posted!
I too have a medical appointment today and feeling nervous argh... hopefully it all goes smoothly :)
Lots of hugs
Sxx
Thanks again for the sweet replies. I woke up this morning scared straight knowing today is the day I will probably hear the news on my heart. I went down the rabbit hole of Google last night and I know I shouldn't have. I'm just still trying to find an answer to this unpleasant feeling. I just don't think it's anxiety. I wake up with it. The second I got out of bed to go to the bathroom, I felt that weight in my chest. When I'm relaxed in bed or on the couch, I don't always feel it but as soon as I get up and move, it's there. Just at my wits end! Ugh! Good luck with your appointment today, samina! I'm sure all will go well!
Hey lady,
How did your appointment go? My gut tells me it went well? We really don't realise what a HUGE effect anxiety has on us physically. It can do all kinds of things, and affects us in different ways. Mine plays havoc with my stomach but I've noticed with other stuff too, breathing, sleeping, headaches... Some people go to the loo more, others can't go.
The way I see it is I am SO overly sensitive to EVERY sensation my body feels because I basically have a lot of time doing nothing since most days, I just sit at home with my little baby (which is amazing of course) but it means my mind is quite empty and I notice everything so much more. Honestly, since my baby was born, I have convinced myself I have at least 5 or 6 different terminal issues.
Anyway, do let us know how your appointment went.
Mine was ok - good as in the Dr. didn't seem to think there was anything serious wrong but bad as I felt like he didn't really do his job thoroughly - but I'm quite sure this is the HA talking rather than anything else...
Anyhoo Girlrock, do let us know how you get on.
Hugs
Sxx
Haven't heard anything yet! Hubby says that if I was in heart failure, surely they would have called right away. I'd like to take the kids out today since my husband is off work but I'm afraid I'll miss the call. My doctor always calls my house number instead of my cell phone for some reason.
Agree they would be urgently calling!
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End of business day two and still no call. Really hoping that's a good thing! I'm still too scared to call myself. Everyone keeps telling me to but I just can't. Took my daughter to a local library function tonight and had an anxiety attack while I was there. I felt like I couldn't breathe and the chest pressure was so intense and then I started having an attack and it spiraled. Thank God my husband was along. I took a .25 Ativan and felt relief from all of it then. Going to try to relax now the rest of the evening.
Honestly, bc the ativsn helps, I do not think it's heart related. But still they need to call!!!!
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Any news?
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Nope, they never called as of Friday. Still going with the "no news is good news" mantra. It's been a rough week/weekend but I did have a good day today! I kept busy and didn't feel like I had breathing problems until this evening when my newborn was crying a lot. So maybe it is stress and anxiety �� Thanks for checking in!
I wore my holter monitor yesterday into this morning and I had a lot of heart palpitations. I'm scared to see what they will say about them. My chest pressure and shortness of breath seems to have suddenly lifted the last 4 days...oddly enough. But then my palpitations picked up.
I can't believe they haven't called! That's frustrating.
Heart Palps are considered non threatening, so that's good. Curious still for results!
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ServerError
17-08-17, 16:24
I don't know what it's like in the US, but in the UK you can wait a while for results if everything is fine. When I had my MRI, I gave up waiting after three weeks and called them and they were like "oh yeah, everything's fine, results were normal."
ScaredLizard
17-08-17, 17:18
Hi sweetie! First off that first 6 weeks after a baby is so hard. It was hell on my anxiety actually.
I have had numerous halters. Since your ativan helps I'm betting you have anxiety or stress related PAC/PVCs it's a premature contraction of the heart and so it makes your heart feel like it's fluttering. Everyone has them most people just are able to ignore them. But with anxiety we often obsess and pay attention to every little thing.
Any updates???
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So sorry it took me so long to respond! I am so busy with the baby and my toddler. I did have a follow up appointment with my GP who said everything was fine. My echo was normal and my holter test was fine. He didn't go into detail so I asked about all the palpitations and he said that the report did say they saw them but that they were benign and I had two episodes of some kind of tachycardia that can be attributed to anxiety.
My family and I went on a beach vacation about two weeks after I last posted so that was another reason I hadn't been online. Also, while packing and getting ready for the trip, my palps and chest pressure finally decreased and then went away all together by the time I got to the beach. I only took one Ativan the entire time and it was on the car ride down because of my husband's driving haha. I haven't been experiencing panic or physical anxiety symptoms lately but my mind is still going a thousand miles a minute. Now my stomach has been bothering me and it seems I can't tolerate alcohol anymore. When I wake up after a drink or two, my stomach feels like it's been ripped to shreds and feels that way for a week or more. I'm going to back off a while. My left temple has also been getting sharp pains in it and I was recently tested (again) for a slew of issues by my rheumatologist. I see him next month.
Thanks again so much for the support and again, I apologize for not updating sooner! I've just been so busy! I've thought of it 100 times but I always get distracted by other things.
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