View Full Version : madness?? help!
hey guys, I am in the middle of a pretty intense anxiety attack. I have been experiencing acute anxiety for the last 3 months and I cannot stop thinking that I am going mad. Part of this is because of my symptoms, which are mostly all mental, which is different right?. I get depersonalization, my memory hasn't been 100 percent, I find it hard to say smart things unlike before, I sometimes get racing thoughts, etc. My physical symptoms only include tension headaches, hot flashes and at the rare time palpitations. Today my anxiety seemed to build and build to the point where i felt like I was stupid or slow. I could only focus on the anxiety. I'm so scared that I am going to lose it and that this is more than just anxiety. I sometimes convince myself that I'm mad to the point where I start thinking how my family will react to me being mad, what my buddies will think and so on. I took a sleeping pill last night and found it hard to pass out because the drowsy feeling made it difficult for me to think critically causing a huge anxiety attack. DOes anyone relate to these thinking difficulties when having anxiety or is this all in my head? I'm so worried that this could be the beginning of madness.
Hey Hutch - rest assured that you are NOT going mad! When in a state of high anxiety, many of us have experienced those feelings and wondered the exact same thing.
Try not to over-analyse the situation. You have anxiety and that alone can give you all sorts of unpleasant symptoms. The key is to learn to accept them and not be frightened of them (it's the fear that perpetuates the feelings and makes the symptoms worse). No harm will come to you. As soon as you can believe that, things will start to get improve very quickly. That, together with any treatment you may be having, will put you on the road to recovery.
You're not alone and I'm sure many people here will identify with what you have said. As someone who has recovered from anxiety, I can categorically state that, although I too thought I was mad at one point, I'm actually not!
I prefer to think of myself as a genius now (it's a fine line apparently!) :-)
Hope you start to feel better soon.
Eeb x
hey.... dont worry... i've been through everything you said... dont worry...
when my panic attacks started i was too scared to tell anyone what was going through my mind cos i thought i'd get locked up but it is perfectly normal..
you need to reailse that your thoughts are making you more anxious and therefore you physical symptoms are getting worse which in turn makes your thoughts worse... you need to break this cycle... i know its REALLY hard but the best thing you can do is stop being afraid of what your thinking and feeling... each time you hear yourself thinking "what if...." stop yourself... your anxiety is feeding off those thoughts... YOU ARE NOT GOING MAD... have you read any books by cl;aire weekes... its good reading... even thouigh its probably seemed like forever to you, 3 months isn't long at all... the best thing you can do is research anxiety/panic attacks... through understanding the fear becomes eliminated.... try your best to not avoid things because of fear of having an attack... i did that and 3 years later im still struggling, i wish i'd had better understanding and less fear at the beggining and maybe i'd be better now... dont worry YOU ARE NOT GOING MAD
i should just add that i no longer feel im going mad and thats through understanding the attacks... when you start to feel anxious and you're not afraid its amazing now quickly it'll disappear.. you'll be ok....
hi hutch,
sorry to hear that you are struggling with your anxiety at the moment, but you are certainly not alone in feeling this way! i dont know if it helps you to know that, i hope it does.
im also in an acute phase right now, although i am slowly getting better.
do you have much information about what is the matter with you? have you read any books or had any therapy?
you cannot and will not go mad from anxiety!!!! i know that a million people could tell you that and you probably would still be worried, right?
from a really great book that ive read ive learnt to ACCEPT how im feeling and ACCEPT the worse possible outcome to your situation first.
i know that sounds scary, but the theory is that by demanding that all your symptoms go away NOW you are putting more pressure on yourself, because you are monitoring your progress constantly, and then you are adding more adrenaline to your system when you tell yourself ' oh no, its still there' while you are demanding your symptoms to go they only seem to get worse.
about 5 weeks ago now, i could hardly sleep or eat and i had so little energy but at the same time i was constantly agitated. that had started 3 weeks previously when after a spell of having random panics i went into the biggest panic id had in 5 years, lasting 1 and a half hours with my whole body shaking uncontrollably!
guess what happened after that? i was so fearful of it happening again that i ended up in the state i just mentioned for 3 weeks!
it was only when i went back to my book that i started to get better - when i began to ACCEPT the situation i was in.
still not feeling great and i am still getting de-realization, but only when im in an anxiety provoking situation, but have got mutiple physical symptoms at any given time, but i know that they will go in time.
it sounds as though you are experiencing the same thing and it is known as a panic cycle, you are so concerned with how you feel that you are creating how you feel.
i know it isnt very nice but you can and will get better. so many people on here can advise you, so that if you are not getting any professional help you can get alot of reassurance that you will be okay, maybe use this site to help you to feel better.
hope that all helps
good luck with it
emma
basically ive just said the same as honeybee! but without realizing as sometimes i miss out what others have said first, so i can respond, only to read them after ive posted, and see ive just said the same thing!!!
anyway just goes to prove that many of us on here are able to help others who are struggling more with this problem and give them the reassurance they need.
we can try to get help from our families and we can try to get help from mental health professionals but at the end of the day i stil feel more comfortable talking with people and reading others experiences on here, because i know im not alone with this problem.
wow thanks for the reassurance guys! I find it amazing how caring and kind you all are. I woke up about 2 hours ago and I'm feeling much better. I've listened to your advice of acceptance and its already showing positive results. Now I just have to find a way to be comfortable around my friends and relatived again and to do this I have to somehow overcome the fear of them seeing me act wierd due to my anxiety. Any ideas to overcome this?
or have any of you found a way to not feel aqward in conversation?
michellemumof4
31-05-07, 22:30
Hutch
let me try to ease your fears, what you have is acute anxiety which a illness of the nervous system and is therefore called A Neurosis , Madness or Some other more serious illness are a illness of the mind and are called Psycosis, A Neurosis can never ever ever become a Psycosis it is medically impossible....
The symptoms you describe are classic signs of a tired mind which happens as a result of anxiety it is no different to the feeling a student may get when they are studying for their exams and trying to cram information into their brain, the difference is we dont look at it rationally and mistake the symptoms for something much worse ie - the fear of going mad.
It helps to try to relax and allow your mind to rest, I know it isnt alway easy but it is possible,
the other thing to remember a mad man does not feel mad he feels what he considers to be normal, the mere fact that you recognise that you dont feel right means you are a perfectly sane person
hope this helps love
Michelle xx
hey hutch,
really glad that you felt better. the thing is though it doesnt happen over night that you get better you have to stick with it and not get disheartened and you also have to apply it to EVERY anxiety provoking situation.
so now you are FOCUSING on other people seeing you look WEIRD and you are now worrying about that.
okay so now accept all your friends and family seeing you looking WEIRD first and really go over what that would mean to you, ask yourself a) would they actually notice? b) what would it matter if they did see you looking weird? c) would they actually reject you? - probably not! d) would that be the worst thing that could happen to you? etc etc
you have to also accept that people who are feeling highly anxious do sometimes act differently, lets say rushing out of somewhere, or standing around procrastinating as to whether to go ahead with some activity,it may help you to remember that as focused as you are on yourself most 'normal' people are also focused on themselves but just in a slightly different way.
they may notice you but they dont really become tied up with what you are doing, just ask yourself do you think you are that important as to be noticed by everyone? this sounds a bit harsh but basically it is true!
keep up the good work and you will get better, but make sure you dont make it a demand and also give it some time, you need time to switch off that negative voice it doesnt happen magically over night you have to WORK at it!
good luck emma xxxxx
Oooh Hutch - I can relate to your post. it frightened me to pieces when I thought I was going mad. Was convinced I'd have to be locked up and my little toddler taken off me. But when I broke down and the emergency Dr' was telephoned their calmness almost shocked me.
It is the anxiety and when in the middle of your 'madness' just make yourself safe. e.g sit on the settee, hug a cushion with a glass of water and breathe deeply. I found when I tried to fight it - it made it worse. After a few months I made the decision to let it have me. To see what would happen. Had the scariest weekend ever but I have never been as bad since. Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom to go back up.
I hope you find ways of coping with it. Don't be scared by it or feel alone. Because you are not. If struggling - blurt it all on here. We don't mind cos' we understand. Hugs xxxx
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