Scared of going mad!

[flatterycat]

Hi all
I am going through a horrible bout of anxiety right now. The thing that is scaring me at the moment is that I am going to crack up. I keep having REALLY weird thoughts and they are scaring me so much. I almost feel scared to write them down, but am hoping someone out there will have experienced something similar? Basically I can be watching TV and see someone then think "what if I start thinking they are sending me messages"? or "what if I start believing people are after me" or "what if I start behaving oddly"? I'm scared that reading this people will think I am cracking up and need help because I have admitted to these strange thoughts. When I get them I feel the most intense feeling of anxiety and fear flood through me and then start thinking I'll never get over this bout and that it's just gonna get worse. I have had anxiety bouts off and on for over 20 years and everytime I get it I think weird things and I always think it'll never go. In the past it has always eventually gone and I have been fine again for a couple of years or so. I just want to know that other people have these crazy thoughts and that it is just anxiety and that I am not on the edge of madness.

Thanks x

[groovygranny]

Hello flatterycat!

Yes I have had these crazy thoughts,

Yes it is anxiety and No you're not on the edge of madness :hugs:!!

If you were you probably wouldn't be posting here worried about it!

If it has gone away before there is no reason why it won't this time, and hopefully posting on here and writing things down will help speed that process up.

big hugs for you

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

:flowers:

[flatterycat]

Thankyou so much.
It helps to know that other people have weird thoughts and that I am not that unique!!!! My brain just seems open to any suggestion right now!

:flowers:

[sarah1984]

Hi Flatterycat,
Take a look at Hutch's post a few posts down from yours on this forum. (Sorry I don't know how to link). He's experiencing exactly the same anxieties as you at the moment and I think fear of insanity must be a common anxiety issue. You're not going mad at all-you're experiencing a classic case of the "What ifs....?" which are very familiar to all us anxiety sufferers. The fact that you've experienced these thoughts in the past and have recovered is proof that you will get through this latest bout.

[mingsy]

Hi,
When my anxiety is bad I have exactly the same thoughts, "I might hear voices from the telly or the latest is the hill i look out onto, and they might tell me to do awful things". But as my consellor says "mad" people don't believe they are deranged they think its normal and nothing is wrong with them. I also think that all this anxiety will push me over the edge, but the consellor said she has never had or heard anyone with anxiety going on to have madness, anxiety is a separate illness.
So don't worry you are not alone with these horrible thoughts and no you are not going insane.:D

[nomorepanic]

Have a read of the Symptoms page - this is all explained about half way down...

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/NMPcms.php?nmppage=symptoms

[MikeyT]

Any one feel free to correct me here.

As far as I can remember - the part of the brain that causes anxiety, is a different part the causes phycosis or madness etc.

Mick

[samtheman]

I think you have to use positive afermation here, You think am I go crazy? Replace that with a more positive though like, Of course i'm not going crazy, this is just part of my condition.

If you where going crazy you wouldn't notice it.

[Ozpanic]

Hi Flatterycat, your thread rang bells to me, sometimes i feel its almost like Paranoia too, when you get these thought's, some of them are out of this world..I know though i have no evidence to back them up, but still it really can ruin a day or send me into a spin:wacko:...this is when i tend to (put on ipod) try to get out of that zone for a bit.... Goodluck Oz

[Tomimo]

You are not alone....I am really suffering with the 'what if's' at the moment. I worry that I wwill begin to hear voices/go crazy, etc.....'what if I'm not really here at all?' 'what if I really am schizophrenic and everyone I know are acutally not real?'

I have been assured my medical professionals and members on here that apparently it is normal to get this and if you were really going mad you wouldn't question it.....very scary none the less!

Annie x

[lifeissweet]

hi...i get this too sometimes, it is very scary, but i read in Claire Weekes that this is basically becasue of an overstimulated nervous system (tired mind i guess!)...i dont think those thoughts anymore, or at least i dont dwell on them, they are only thoughts, and as someone once said to me..if you were going crazy or losing your mind you wouldnt be worried about it!!..X

[Carol27]

Hi, i have been having the most bizarre thoughts that chop and change, my Dr told me today they are ALL symptoms of anxiety, he said i'm not afraid of the thoughts but the reaction they cause. To me though it always seems to be the thoughts bizarre content that terrifies me as i think surely no one else could think anything remotely as weird. I too was afraid to mention it to both my Dr and on the forum but he didn't bat an eyelid. Firstly i became terrified i was schizophrenic, then possessed, then i went to my daughters, the tv was on the kids were watching scooby doo and in the care on way home i had the most dreadful thought i am a wereolf pop into my head and caused major panic attacks, all these became quite obsessional and still are at times, they chop and change, like i get used to one and then another takes its place, i even got afraid the radiator or some other inaminate object would talk to me, all terrifying stuff so i know how you feel, i hate every moment of it, best wishes, Carol x

[Carol27]

Also go to page 3 of thread as the other day i found and posted some useful info on scary thoughts, love Carol x

[monika]

I feel like this a lot when i feel anxious. I get really paranoid and have thoughts like maybe ill loose control, ill kill someone, what if someones watching me.

I once got an obsesssion that every shiny black car i was had people in them watching me. Im over it now, but anxiety cause the mind to be more alert and give you compulsive thoughts.

Dont worry, your're not mad :)

[peach]

i have to agree with some of the answers here too..

when i go through to awful- omg, im going mad- feeling...

i just keep reminding myself that crazy people dont think theyre going crazy. they are in fact unaware of whats happening.....

so i think this should confirm to you that your definatly not going mad and its just anxiety.

even aside from anxiety, i think everyone thinks really messed up thoughts at times. i think its part of being human.


take care!

[Ozpanic]

You are not alone....I am really suffering with the 'what if's' at the moment. I worry that I wwill begin to hear voices/go crazy, etc.....'what if I'm not really here at all?' 'what if I really am schizophrenic and everyone I know are acutally not real?'

I have been assured my medical professionals and members on here that apparently it is normal to get this and if you were really going mad you wouldn't question it.....very scary none the less!

Annie x

Hey Tomimo (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/member.php?u=1834) thanks i just came back from friends who had o/seas visitors there too, i felt so dissasociated it wasnt funny. At one point i thought i beter go now but i managed to hang in there, even though i felt all deranged god i hate panic.:doh:

[idesign516]

I can definitely relate to almost everything the previous posters have said! I was having a few really good weeks recently, and still feel I am on the road to full recovery, only to have a terrible experience yesterday. I have this thing about unattended bags. No matter if I'm in an airport or a coffee shop, any unattended bag makes me start to freak out. Yesterday, a man left his backpack on the seat next to me in a cafe, obviously to claim that seat, but then he proceeded to walk outside and use his phone. I was already on edge because a man had sat down next to me earlier and tried to engage in conversation, and he seemed "a bit off" if you will. Anyway, I had been worrying for a while, and then this unattended bag thing happened, and as he went out to use his phone, I had the irrational thought that "oh, he's using a cell phone to activate a bomb in his bag!" even though I was in a relatively empty coffee shop, and he was standing not five feet from the entrance. Nevertheless, I reacted to the paranoid thought, which resulted in a huge panic attack that caused me to flee the building for my safety. Once I was back in my car, I started to worry that me having this thought, and then reacting so strongly to it meant that I was indeed going crazy, but I don't know, finding forums like this have made me more hopeful.

There is obviously the thought in the back of my head that reminds me that I'm a very logical person who is just falls prey to very illogical and irrational thoughts at times, but for whatever reason, my rationality was just not working yesterday at that moment (probably due to the panicking). It is really hard for me to type this because my biggest fear is that I'll just deteriorate into insanity, and that someone reading this will go "Oh yeah, that story's a sure sign that she's insane", but I just had to get this out because other people's assurance and stories tend to make me feel a lot better. In the back of my mind, I know better, but sometimes thoughts just shout so loud that they seem like real threats to me. I've been doing really well these past few weeks, and I am hoping to continue this trend tomorrow and all the days after. It's been a while since I googled my symptoms, but hey, we all have setbacks once in a while. Only natural, I suppose! Doing my best to stay positive and not react to thoughts, but I was just wondering if anyone else has ever experienced a weird and short bout of paranoia (I realize this doesn't insure that I'm crazy!).

I should have mentioned that I was diagnosed with GAD earlier this summer, and also suffer from the odd panic attack and the obsessions part of OCD.

Wishing everyone the best!

Amelia

[Harley]

Hi Flatterycats, obsessive thoughts!!! What do you want to know. I suffered these for ten years. First of all let me reassure you. You are not going mad and no, anxiety does not lead to madness. The thoughts are a "symptom" of your anxiety. When your anxiety drops the thoughts will just disappear. If there was any truth in them they would not worry you. The content of the thought is irrelevant, they are anxiety thoughts. I suffered horrendously for ten years, but with a combination of therapy, drugs and a lot of determination, I completely overcame it. It you want to pm me and ask me any questions, feel free to do so. I dont think there is much I dont know about obsessive thoughts and how they work.

[Laurenita]

Ah, this post has cheered me up, more than you can ever imagine! To know that people are going through the same thing as me is literally the nicest feeling in the whole entire world!