Don't know how to fix this

[scaredgirl86]

I've been having a really bad time past week. I try to be happy and like myself but I easily get down again im fighting OCD thoughts constantly and health anxiety and my social anxiety makes it impossible to go out without feeling inhuman. I'm also dealing with the fact that my younger sister is a blonde she dresses provocative and all these years guys have worshipped her. I'm not like that I have dark hair pale skin wear very little makeup I actually have a better face but it don't matter. She knows about me feeling bad about myself and spitefully tells me all the guys that hit on her gave her money and how she is treated like royalty. I've been rejected by guys I've liked and she would spitefully add them to annoy me and no she don't know them or have any connection to them they are not her friends and they would ignore me and like her every time. The best is the guy I've liked for years who was as mean as you could be to someone to me all cause I liked him he ruined me years ago and s good reason why I have social anxiety. My sister added him while ago again to annoy me and right away he asked her out but she didn't accept cause she has a bf. She asked him about me and he says he vaguely remembers me and that was it. Meanwhile I for years helped him out and talked him through all the breakup he had cause he chose wrong girls and I did this even after he treated me like crap. He just magically forgets or just doesn't care. He still is obsessed with my sister likes all her stuff it hurts even though I don't like him anymore all the pain I've been through liking him and he just goes after my sister she gets treatment like a princess. She tells me everday that he likes her stuff and it makes me angry. I'm tired of feeling I'm not good enough and it seems the same only way to be liked is to be her but I won't I dont want to be. I'm tired of this and feeling that i won't ever have a boyfriend any advice

[Hollow]

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your situation, it sounds like your sister is very immature the way she is acting towards you and needs a couple of slaps.The dating scene is very superficial right now just like a lot of the people are too, i admire you for being yourself under these circumstances. You should ignore all the haters and continue to be yourself and I'm sure you will find someone who likes you for who you are.

[scaredgirl86]

Thank you. It's very difficult to hear her constantly telling me about these guys. I feel contempt for these guys especially my old crush. He is single cause every girl he dated broke up with him. It hurts that he doesn't feel wrong liking and hitting on the sister of someone who use to like him. He hasn't grown up at all since school. It makes me want revenge sometimes

[Hollow]

Thank you. It's very difficult to hear her constantly telling me about these guys. I feel contempt for these guys especially my old crush. He is single cause every girl he dated broke up with him. It hurts that he doesn't feel wrong liking and hitting on the sister of someone who use to like him. He hasn't grown up at all since school. It makes me want revenge sometimes

Your sister knows that it pisses you off when she tells you about all these guys that probably don't even exist. I think rather than being annoyed you should pretend that you're happy for her, this way her attempts to upset you will backfire.

As far as your ex crush, it sounds like you had a lucky escape. The best revenge for you will be show these guys that you've moved on and no longer have any feelings towards them. This will take away any power that they think they might have over you.

[scaredgirl86]

The sad thing is other people talk about how everyone likes my sister even my brother said every friend he brings over likes her which hurts cause I really am way better looking but no one sees this. If I got over my anxiety and went out when my sister is around I feel they would hit on her and ignore me. I definitely think it's her blonde hair. It makes me sad that guys are shallow enough to want only blondes

[Hollow]

I definitely think it's her blonde hair. It makes me sad that guys are shallow enough to want only blondes

A lot of that has to with propaganda in the media, these guys have been programmed to find a certain look more attractive, they would hit on a dog if it has a blonde wig. You're right it's a very shallow way of thinking, personally i find the dark hair look more attractive.

[scaredgirl86]

I agree dark hair is nicer. I'm tired of feeling like I'm not enough for guys. I know I need to work on myself and fix my anxieties but without thinking of guys I feel empty. It's really bothering me that no one finds me attractive. I don't want to care but I don't know how to change it