Anyone had long term success through CBT?

[Leah88]

Trigger - dark post
Only been doing cbt for a few weeks. I've gone from health anxiety which has been a few years ongoing to exsistential crisis at the moment. ( I think the latter was brought on by having a baby) I keep challenging the negative thoughts but it's been so long that they have been my default, that I wonder if it's a losing battle. Is it a delusion to live everyday with hope that everything's fine when In reality we are all just trudging toward our inevitable non existence, because to not be in the delusion is too dark a place for me to exsist. Can anyone say they've gotten better from this way of thinking? Please share if you have. No "god will take care of your fate" replies please as I am a science brain not a religious brain. Just looking for hope that cbt can work if you stick to it.? I'm losing the fight it feels. I'm panicking about time going by too quickly. I'm aware I cannot control it and I need to make the most etc. but this line of thinking makes the panicky feeling worse. How do you find peace when you believe this is all there is and that the remaining years will be a blip on a radar? How do you make the most of things when the idea of mortality is so frightening? I need some perspective and success stories. I didn't think anything was worse than health anxiety but it is a party compared to an exsistential crisis. At least with pure H.A there are brief periods of peace. I feel no peace now.

[Sage579]

I have not being doing it that long nearly a year now some things like positive thinking are a habit now. Things like not reacting to nagative thoughts still take effort on my part but it has become easier. I added some mindfull meditation to the mix here and there. Over I say it works but takes along time to see results because people like with anxiety and depression and what not learn the wrong behaviors to things with noticing. So changing how we act to things we didn't even no were wrong is hard and takes It takes time.

[EKB]

I'm a science brain too, and I found counselling helpful. But yeah, it's a process and it does take time. And even out the other end, HA is a thing that needs managed and may still come and go when stress goes up. I'm struggling a bit right now because my life is in complete upheaval - so I'm just being really careful to do all the things that helped before. And it is working, but it is effort.

Something that helped me and my science brain was to do a bit of reading on what anxiety can do to the body, and that helped sort through some of the symptoms (anxiety can make me feel that? yup.). I also find meditation, yoga, and exercise helps me function and feel better about myself. There's some woo to sort through sometimes, but getting down to the aspect of the thing that is helpful is... helpful.

As for "this is all there is"... as an atheist, I've found even though I don't believe in a god, or an afterlife, I still need to fulfill part of myself philosophically. There are some good posts over at brainpickings.org that I've enjoyed and found enlightening. I think finding even a little bit happiness and contentment everyday is valuable. I try to have a sense of humour about the human condition to fend of the existential angst.

Hope that's helpful. I know it seems a bit hopeless right now, but you're on the right path.

[NervUs]

I came out on the other side of HA once, but then I did relapse, ugh.

My HA definitely veers into existential angst, not only my life will be a blip thoughts but also I find life/human society so flipping absurd most of the time. I can't even with it anymore and yet, I don't want to die, lol. Or at least die young. I think there will probably come a time when I want to be dead, if I live to an old age. My grandmother was at that point when she died, and I think that was a gift. My grandfather was NOT at all at peace with his mortality, even at the bitter end when he was doing terribly.

I'm an atheist too, and I think the idea that there is no meaning except the meaning we make is empowering. For me, finding the things that really make me tick, setting goals, and finding challenges is pretty motivating, especially when I have my HA under control and realize that HA/ cancer fear is what is robbing me, not the fact of mortality. My HA is fueled by medical testing-- unfortunately, I get lumps and suspicious things constantly, and I have spent months and months this year going through medical testing for three separate issues/masses. The testing takes so flipping long and distracting, and it just wipes any motivation to pursue my very earthly dreams (I am a writer). Even though I don't think fulfilling my goals really makes a huge difference in the long run (remember the absurdity thing, lol?), I know it makes ME happy.

IDK if any of this answered your question, but it's hard to come to peace with mortality. It really sucks feeling it in your soul that time is limited, especially when you have people depending on you here. I think the fact that I have young kids exacerbates my issues times a million.

[Leah88]

Thanks for the replies, I like to read different perspectives on things. I like to think that the fear of horrible things is worse than the thing itself and I'm trying to love in the moment. I guess it just takes time. I can really understand now how people with post natal depression commit suicide. People used to warn me about how hard mental health is to deal with once you have children but I couldn't quite grasp the complexity of how the situation would end up. I alsways just figured well if something happened to my husband and I had nothing to live for then I'd just steal some medazapine from work and overdose but now that I have my daughter I can't have that escape route so I'm really trapped. Do you think non anxiety sufferers just focus on the good and don't ruminate about the bad ? I think I need some heavier drugs.