Velvet
20-10-17, 03:07
Was a workaholic, had melt down, (3 years ago)various reasons, work related stress one of them, suffering trauma.
As a result, I isolate a lot, I go on trips and feel grateful I’m still able to do this .
I cut a lot of people out of my life. Were I used to be social, I now avoid social situations. Mostly fear of being judged. Symptoms of agoraphobia in my own area, but can go out when away from my area...that seems strange even to me :ohmy:
Been thinking about the future ....
It kinda looks bleak really ....I think I become more reclusive as time goes by.
I’m single and mostly happy with that, I fear a relationship could be detrimental to my health sometimes. Do I get lonely, at times yes, but it’s kind of a chosen loneliness...
Feeling like I will be alone now forever, does make me a little sad though,
Always been in a long term relationship up until around 4years ago....
I guess it’s a fear...
I wondered if anyone else felt the same...or anyone had overcome the fear..
I wouldn’t go on a dating site, even if I decided I would try dating ...I have tried them a long long time ago and found them soul destroying....I know some have had success with them but for me they just aren’t right....
Or maybe I just need a buddy someone to go occasional meal with and to the cinema etc... I’m not sure....thinking out loud this evening about the future...
All that said, I kinda feel safer alone....
Just a crazy mixed up person I guess......
It’s good to write it down it kinda helps...
As a result, I isolate a lot, I go on trips and feel grateful I’m still able to do this .
I cut a lot of people out of my life. Were I used to be social, I now avoid social situations. Mostly fear of being judged. Symptoms of agoraphobia in my own area, but can go out when away from my area...that seems strange even to me :ohmy:
Been thinking about the future ....
It kinda looks bleak really ....I think I become more reclusive as time goes by.
I’m single and mostly happy with that, I fear a relationship could be detrimental to my health sometimes. Do I get lonely, at times yes, but it’s kind of a chosen loneliness...
Feeling like I will be alone now forever, does make me a little sad though,
Always been in a long term relationship up until around 4years ago....
I guess it’s a fear...
I wondered if anyone else felt the same...or anyone had overcome the fear..
I wouldn’t go on a dating site, even if I decided I would try dating ...I have tried them a long long time ago and found them soul destroying....I know some have had success with them but for me they just aren’t right....
Or maybe I just need a buddy someone to go occasional meal with and to the cinema etc... I’m not sure....thinking out loud this evening about the future...
All that said, I kinda feel safer alone....
Just a crazy mixed up person I guess......
It’s good to write it down it kinda helps...