Look at Urine or Not?

[Cptdebbie]

I have been working so hard with my therapist to stay away from forums and the Internet. I have a question, though, and I don't know where else to ask it. So, I'm turning to you.

My therapist says that my checking behavior is continuing my cycle of health anxiety. Well, DUH! I know that. However, she said that I should consider not even looking at my urine after I relieve myself. This one surprised me. I am 57 years old. I don't drink or smoke, but last year I found a small blood clot in my urine. I went through the whole urological work up. Not once was a drop of blood found in any of the urine tests I took, and it was ultimately determined the blood came from somewhere else on my body and dropped in the urine. The whole episode nevertheless scared me.

I don't dwell on my urine, but I do look at it. And, yes, I often see something that worries me. Frequently I wonder if something was in the toilet before I used it, or if it came out of me. (I seem to look more closely after I use it than before.). Last week I thought I saw a blood clot. I scooped it out to be tested. On closer inspection, it was a wound up piece of yarn. This event is what brought the whole thing up at my therapy session.

My therapist said most people do not look at their urine. I might be asking the wrong group, but do you?

[melfish]

Haha, we're not most people, we're a bunch of hypochondriacs, so your sample is indeed flawed :)
That said, yes, I take a quick glance to check my hydration level. But that's all.

[Annaboodle]

I've discussed this with non-HA "normalites" in the past and can confirm that most people do not look at their urine. They pee and then skip away happily from the toilet (ok, they probably don't do that part...)

I look at mine though of course.

[Chick100]

Hi.
I don´t have HA, but like melfish I have a quick glance at my pee too, and also the other thing that gets left in the loo.
I wonder if you have hemorrhoids? maybe that could be the reason you saw a little blood clot?

[swajj]

I obsessed over mine for a long time. I read somewhere (as you do before you wake up to yourself) that dark urine could be a sign of something sinister. I’d never bothered taking much notice of my urine until then. When I did it seemed so dark. But I wasn’t sure because I couldn’t remember what it used to look like. I got over my obsession...eventually. I don’t look anymore.

I read somewhere (maybe here) a tip to stop people studying what was in the toilet bowl. That was to turn the light off when going to the toilet. Maybe try that.

[TBmummy]

I have HA that only rears it’s head when I really genuinely feel unwell (this makes sense in my head!!) not when I see a scratch or something. My HA is centred completely around the big C. 99% of the time when I am managing my anxiety myself I don’t even check the toilet when i pee...I just flush! Right now I have a uti and associated back ache and it’s giving me cause for concern and so my anxiety is high...so I’m checking my urine. It’s isndoing nothing but feeding my anxiety!! I know that but I just can’t stop...

[MyNameIsTerry]

I've discussed this with non-HA "normalites" in the past and can confirm that most people do not look at their urine. They pee and then skip away happily from the toilet (ok, they probably don't do that part...)

I look at mine though of course.

Being a bloke if I didn't focus intensely on it throughout I'd probably miss the toilet altogether! :biggrin:

[daisyflower]

Why don't you try and look only once a day? I look every time but then I don't have anxieties about my wee. My issue is poo..

[swgrl09]

I have gone through this myself. Several years ago I was so obsessed with specks in it, etc. Also had a little relapse when I got pregnant - when I wiped I noticed red dots and that freaked me out. Eventually I realized the red dots were actually part of the toilet paper. :doh: I think the less we check the better. If you are in pain or something is blatantly obvious, then worry. But if it's something you have to search and search to find, it is probably nothing.

[beasty340]

I've recently stopped using urinals as a male because I could not see my urine well enough... I have a really bad tendency to obsess with certain medical things when a "symptom" appears. When it was meningitis I had to carry around my thermometer, now its colon cancer and I am taking my iPhone flash light and looking at my stool...

[Cptdebbie]

Thank you all for your responses. I am so grateful to have a support group to turn to when I need it. I especially like the idea of going in the dark. My bathroom doesn’t have any windows so that is definitely doable.

I tried once a day, but if there was anything that looked a tiny bit off, I was sucked into continuing to check.

Once again, thank you. It’s especially nice that I can bring up things like bathroom issues and you understand and respond. ��

[MyNameIsTerry]

Use the ERP element of CBT to eliminate the compulsion. This may mean reducing check numbers, check time lengths, etc.

It can also be used to insert times between checks so you make them longer & longer. For instance, you got it down to one (which was excellent work) but couldn't quite break that but maybe inserting longer delays between that check could have helped desensitise you to needing to do it as you learn to tolerate the anxiety of waiting longer until you start to see the anxiety fading in future trips.

Compulsions keep obsessions alive. They tick the box in the cycle that the fear is looking for. The more you break free of them, which is always hard at first, the more you find you don't need them.

Quite a few things in life we just look at and we aren't checking. Toilets are prime candidates for this. I look at everything in the bowl, on the paper, etc but it doesn't affect me (not a HAer) and sometimes there can be a need for a certain level of monitoring of health anyway which makes it harder when you have obsessive-compulsive cycles around such things. But learning to reduce it all and changing the core beliefs around these things can help.

Have a look at CBT resources like CCI's workbooks and the free CBT4PANIC Robin offers. These will cover things like this and the thinking behind them. In the CCI resources things like "core beliefs" would be worth a look.

There's a whole subboard on Symptoms for toilet stuff as it's so commonly an issue for us. It can be embarrassing but we're all adults here and it's just a normal part of life.

[swajj]

Thank you all for your responses. I am so grateful to have a support group to turn to when I need it. I especially like the idea of going in the dark. My bathroom doesn’t have any windows so that is definitely doable.

I tried once a day, but if there was anything that looked a tiny bit off, I was sucked into continuing to check.

Once again, thank you. It’s especially nice that I can bring up things like bathroom issues and you understand and respond. ��

lol. I tried it. However I was obsessing over going blind at the time so...

seriously.

Good luck. :)

[budgie1979]

I look at my urine frequently, but mostly because I'm a runner and want to make sure I've hydrated adequately after workouts (i.e. making sure it returns to light yellow-clear). However, I am also a stool checker due to HA, and your therapist is right that it is not a healthy behavior for someone suffering from health anxiety. That's not to say you should never be looking at your stool or urine, but maybe take a break from doing it for a week or so and see if you can "let it go". People without HA don't really think about these things--they glance in the bowl while flushing now and then and would notice a glaring issue, but they aren't closely examining their urine/stool every time or fishing things out of the toilet.