Anxiety seems to be creeping back

[Dissolved girl]

Hi Guys

I haven't posted here for a long time.
I have been doing well for a while, i was taking 100mg Sertraline daily which i started cutting down about 6 months ago. I am not on 50mg daily. I also recently stopped taking my contraceptive pill (about 2 months ago)
Last Christmas i had what i can only describe as a mental break down (i couldn't' stop crying and my anxiety/depression came along with it)
Ever since i have been getting moments where the anxiety has been coming back, i am concerned it is becoming more frequent

I am currently sitting in work freaking out about my throat AGAIN. This is all i ever seem to freak out about. It seems to be my go to anxiety trigger. I know it's bloody ridiculous (the sensible part of my brain knows this) and that i am being stupid but i can't stop the thoughts going around in my head. I'm thinking about all the bad things that could happen to me and my throat (choking, feeling a lump, tonsils) literally everything. The dread rises and then dissipates and then comes back again. At the moment i'm too scared to eat

I've been here before and i am sure i can deal with it again but i'm scared and i don't know what to do. Should i up my meds again? Do you think Anxiety has an underlying cause? Councillors are so expensive!!!
Already i'm having suicidal thoughts because i'm scared of this feeling. It's like a big vicious circle, you get yourself in the right mind set and then everything goes to crap.

I don't know why it's started creeping back. I think i just need people to relate to

Many thanks

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If you're having suicidal thoughts, you need to reach out for help in the real world as quickly as possible. Go to you're doctor or call a hotline, but do something. I know you're only having "thoughts" as opposed to actual intentions, but do seek help as quickly but as you can.

Get referred for some therapy on the NHS. Yes, it can sometimes take a while to come through, but this isn't always the case. It wasn't in mine. You might get telephone consultations or group sessions, which are better than nothing to start with.

I also experienced throat issues during my anxious period. I remember walking to my first therapy session last year choking on the side of the road as if something huge was lodged in my neck. The reality was that nothing was there. Even now, if I'm under a bit of stress or feeling a tad anxious, my throat is one of the first body parts to react. I don't care anymore, though, and you have nothing to worry about. Globus hystericus is a very common anxiety symptom.