Scared of testing - dilemma

[paranoid-viking]

I know now that it is very likely that I may be suffering from gastritis. My symptoms and my medical history with acid reflux is strongly suggesting that.

But I am so afraid of testing myself for it. I am not afraid of being diagnosed with gastritis; if that is the case I could finally find peace with being reassured that the cause of my pain was not pancreatic cancer; my number one murderous fear in the world.
So here is the dilemma; all the monsterous scaremongering I have come across on the net about pancreatic cancer has scared me from testing myself:scared15:
I am so scared if that is what I have. PC is a death sentence, that is almost 100% sure. Virtually everyone with that cancer dies and most dies very fast. Fearing that is my number one nightmare in the world and the web is sworming over with confirmation bias about this thing. And now as I have been mad goose chasing reassurance about that cancer I may also have led my doc to prioritising wrong. I have been som over obsessing about this cancer equvalent of the black death that I failed to look for something much more likely and less dangerous.
But as I say; I am now to scared to screen myself for gastritis out of fear they may fiind cancer. A vicious circle. So "awareness"(read:disease mongering)and media scares about this death cancer has scared me into this vicious cycle.
I dont know what to do. Just live in fear and even risk a worsened stomach inflamation? Terrible dilemma.

[Annaboodle]

If you had pancreatic cancer for as long as you've feared on here you would either be incredibly sick by now or not here any more.

You should stop reading the "monstrous scaremongering" online as your post is guilty of that too. Look at the language you've used, "death cancer", "black death", "death sentence", etc... Not good for others on an HA board.

Surely getting tested for gastritis is better than living in this hand-wringing, agonising state all the time.

[paranoid-viking]

If you had pancreatic cancer for as long as you've feared on here you would either be incredibly sick by now or not here any more.

You should stop reading the "monstrous scaremongering" online as your post is guilty of that too. Look at the language you've used, "death cancer", "black death", "death sentence", etc... Not good for others on an HA board.

Surely getting tested for gastritis is better than living in this hand-wringing, agonising state all the time.

I know, I know.
But I have googled my way into nightmare stories about people with pancreatic cancer who claimed to have symptoms that came and went for years. So I just dont know what to believe. However; there may be that some of those who cliams this had non-cancerous pre-condition that was not caused by cancer itself. After all there is no evidecne that these things was realted to the cancer unless we could invent a time machine and go back in time and scan them for cancer at an earlier stage. Or if they let one to volunteerely live without treatment or medicine after diagnosis to see if this is really possible. Sorry for using such terms. I will be careful to not do so.

To scan my stomach I must go through the extremely painful testing of endoscopy. Here is another problem; one has to lay down calmly and breath carefully. I did that in the past; but I was not scared of cancer back then. It will also be so much more difficult now becase my mond will be focusing on "will they find cancer"; which will make it extemely difficult to relax during the scanning.

[swajj]

I don’t get people who Google worst case scenarios. You know exactly what it is going to do to your mental health because you have done it before. There is really no excuse for it if you are really committed to beating your HA.

[paranoid-viking]

I don’t get people who Google worst case scenarios. You know exactly what it is going to do to your mental health because you have done it before. There is really no excuse for it if you are really committed to beating your HA.

Well, it is a twisted way of seeking reassurance. We sort of hope that the worst case scenario is not matching the symptoms we have - and then it turns out that they are doing just so.
I know I have something; but it is probably "just" gastritis or some immflamation of the aespahaegus.
I know that many people who google worst case scenario gets convinced they have this thing and overlook other things. You see them post questions on helat forum and cancer forums like "what else could it be?". Of course they find something that is unusual about the WCS but they used that as exception to confirm their fair; when they read that the same thing is unusual but does happen in a less serious scenario they automatically dismis that as a "evidence" they dont that and conclude and self-diagnose themsef with WCS. The human mind is quite strange, right?

[swajj]

You know it’s twisted but you still do it?

If you really want to get well then stop reading about sinister conditions. There is no reassurance to be found by doing that.

[paranoid-viking]

You know it’s twisted but you still do it?

If you really want to get well then stop reading about sinister conditions. There is no reassurance to be found by doing that.

If I have gastritis I wont be well by not just stop reading about pancreatic cancer. But it eases my mental mind somehow though.

[Capercrohnj]

Endoscopies are NOT extremely painful. I'm not sure where you got that idea.

[beasty340]

I don’t get people who Google worst case scenarios. You know exactly what it is going to do to your mental health because you have done it before. There is really no excuse for it if you are really committed to beating your HA.

I have to admit... I do the same thing when it comes to something I worry about. Right now it is colon cancer and just read a forum post by a young woman who had blood in her stool for 4 years and then at the age of 27 was diagnosed with colon cancer. She said she was really active and fit and did not have any family history of the disease. I think when we start looking for things and go down the wormhole, it pops up and we cannot help but read it. I try hard and have been working with counseling to not allow myself do it but sometimes it still happens.

[paranoid-viking]

Endoscopies are NOT extremely painful. I'm not sure where you got that idea.

From personal experience 10 years ago perhaps?

---------- Post added at 01:17 ---------- Previous post was at 01:15 ----------


I have to admit... I do the same thing when it comes to something I worry about. Right now it is colon cancer and just read a forum post by a young woman who had blood in her stool for 4 years and then at the age of 27 was diagnosed with colon cancer. She said she was really active and fit and did not have any family history of the disease. I think when we start looking for things and go down the wormhole, it pops up and we cannot help but read it. I try hard and have been working with counseling to not allow myself do it but sometimes it still happens.

You read that story on an anonymous forum? Not in the media? These forums are full of scaremongering trolls. Besides; I have had recurring hemorroids for....well; let`s say 15 years. I bet if I posted this on a cancer forum some people there would insisit I should screen for colon cancer.

[NervUs]

From personal experience 10 years ago perhaps?

---------- Post added at 01:17 ---------- Previous post was at 01:15 ----------



You read that story on an anonymous forum? Not in the media? These forums are full of scaremongering trolls. Besides; I have had recurring hemorroids for....well; let`s say 15 years. I bet if I posted this on a cancer forum some people there would insisit I should screen for colon cancer.

That's a bit much. THe forums are full of people who actually HAVE the disease. They are the statistics, the 1 in 30 or 1 in 500 or 1 in 1,000,000. They are not on those forums to scare but to talk to each other about their diseases. And, yes, they are going to recommend medical action because they needed action.

When WE go to their boards, we are the trolls. We have no business there if we can't handle what we will see.

[Fishmanpa]

That's a bit much. THe forums are full of people who actually HAVE the disease. They are the statistics, the 1 in 30 or 1 in 500 or 1 in 1,000,000. They are not on those forums to scare but to talk to each other about their diseases. And, yes, they are going to recommend medical action because they needed action.

When WE go to their boards, we are the trolls. We have no business there if we can't handle what we will see.

Spot on NervUs! I found this forum because I followed a couple of members here to give them a piece of my mind! (and I did). I ended up staying after reading a bit to try and help.

Imagine actually going through treatment and all the nasties and getting a poster on the boards the likes of a few current posting members. Imagine a dozen or more Head and Neck cancer sufferers reassuring someone and getting the same responses we see here? I can tell you the admins on those boards quickly identified and banned those members. The level of disrespect and self absorption certainly made many of us quite upset.

I can also tell you that the members of disease sites, especially admins and long time members recognize an anxiety sufferer a mile away and it's not tolerated.

Unless you've been diagnosed, stay the hell away! Show some respect, be thankful for your physical health and treat the illness you do have because I assure you, it's taking your life just as the illness you fear would do.

Positive thoughts

[MyNameIsTerry]

When WE go to their boards, we are the trolls. We have no business there if we can't handle what we will see.

Why are you? Are you going there to wind up sick people? I'm sure you aren't so why kick yourself if you have a read...public forums afterall and they are fine with you reading them obviously (not that I think you should or need to)

Surely you are someone with a mental health issue? I somehow doubt cancer sufferers look at those with mental health issues, which they also often experience for obvius reasons, and think that way of you. But of course no one should be posting or joining.

---------- Post added at 01:58 ---------- Previous post was at 01:54 ----------


I have to admit... I do the same thing when it comes to something I worry about. Right now it is colon cancer and just read a forum post by a young woman who had blood in her stool for 4 years and then at the age of 27 was diagnosed with colon cancer. She said she was really active and fit and did not have any family history of the disease. I think when we start looking for things and go down the wormhole, it pops up and we cannot help but read it. I try hard and have been working with counseling to not allow myself do it but sometimes it still happens.

But did a doctor corroborate the 4 years of blood being connected? If not, this could be the person themselves joining up incorrect dots.

[beasty340]

That's a bit much. THe forums are full of people who actually HAVE the disease. They are the statistics, the 1 in 30 or 1 in 500 or 1 in 1,000,000. They are not on those forums to scare but to talk to each other about their diseases. And, yes, they are going to recommend medical action because they needed action.

When WE go to their boards, we are the trolls. We have no business there if we can't handle what we will see.

Yes, I would never go to their board and make an account and speak as if I have the disease or cancer. I think my issue is when I get it into my mind that I have symptoms, I go down rabbit hole of searching anything I possibly can. I will end up stumbling across these stories and forums, which just cause me more anxiety...


But did a doctor corroborate the 4 years of blood being connected? If not, this could be the person themselves joining up incorrect dots.

I am not sure, it sounded as if she had blood in her stool for years, but never did anything about it. I did not stick around in her forum post long enough to find out. When she said she had no family history of the cancer, but still had it I noped out of there quick.

[NervUs]

[QUOTE=MyNameIsTerry;1730508]Why are you? Are you going there to wind up sick people? I'm sure you aren't so why kick yourself if you have a read...public forums afterall and they are fine with you reading them obviously (not that I think you should or need to)

Surely you are someone with a mental health issue? I somehow doubt cancer sufferers look at those with mental health issues, which they also often experience for obvius reasons, and think that way of you. But of course no one should be posting or joining.[COLOR="blue"]

I used the troll language because the previous poster called sick people trolls for posting on their own boards :lac: I will cop to reading forums of the diseases I fear, but I do not make accounts or post.

That said, there seem to be a lot of people fearing said disease who DO just that. And as Fishmanpa says, it is easy to spot their anxiety from a mile away, and it is also easy to see that simply posting or asking about symptoms DOES needle actual sufferers enormously. I personally feel immense shame and guilt even for reading the sites or blogs. As far as I know, I am not sick but still I am identifying in some way with people that are actually going through something traumatizing and life threatening, but I get to move on. They don't.

[MyNameIsTerry]

[QUOTE=MyNameIsTerry;1730508]Why are you? Are you going there to wind up sick people? I'm sure you aren't so why kick yourself if you have a read...public forums afterall and they are fine with you reading them obviously (not that I think you should or need to)

Surely you are someone with a mental health issue? I somehow doubt cancer sufferers look at those with mental health issues, which they also often experience for obvius reasons, and think that way of you. But of course no one should be posting or joining.[COLOR="blue"]

I used the troll language because the previous poster called sick people trolls for posting on their own boards :lac: I will cop to reading forums of the diseases I fear, but I do not make accounts or post.

That said, there seem to be a lot of people fearing said disease who DO just that. And as Fishmanpa says, it is easy to spot their anxiety from a mile away, and it is also easy to see that simply posting or asking about symptoms DOES needle actual sufferers enormously. I personally feel immense shame and guilt even for reading the sites or blogs. As far as I know, I am not sick but still I am identifying in some way with people that are actually going through something traumatizing and life threatening, but I get to move on. They don't.

I don't agree with him that there are loads of trolls out there but they do happen sadly. He meant someone intentionally posting a ficticious story to scare people but that's not the same as a HAer making a bad choice by posting.

But you know you have a mental health issue that needs resolving and surely still empathise with the cancer sufferer? Therefore you are not being disrespectful if you can still have compassion for them. You don't choose this anxiety so you can't choose not to have such elements of it because I'm sure you wouldn't otherwise as to not put yourself in a situation like that where you end up kicking youtrself for empathising.

I think you are too hard on yourself. At the same time I also think that unless your anxiety is so severe that you are one step from hospitalisation stages, there will be many HAers who refuse to let it push them that far. But then perhaps we can't always say for sure when these disorders push many to self harm.

No one should be posting on those forums, they should be coming to places like this instead. That is crossing a line whether the person realises it at the time or not and Admins on those forums need to deal with that.

And they do get to move on. Many of them.

If cancer boards want to stop it there are some ways but I guess they prefer things to be public to encourage sufferers to come forward and get support they are entitled too.

[Capercrohnj]

Hey give you good drugs. The only uncomfortable thing is the spray in the mouth. I had one in March and another next week (I have crohn's so these tests aren't a HA thing). You are asleep during it.

Hemmorhoids are not a colonoscopy cancer red flag.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I am not sure, it sounded as if she had blood in her stool for years, but never did anything about it. I did not stick around in her forum post long enough to find out. When she said she had no family history of the cancer, but still had it I noped out of there quick.

Well she may have had other problems in the bum region for years before the cancer came along. Blood from that region is very common, I've been having it for around 20 years now due to roids, but it's slight blood which most people wouldn't care about or would have already asked their GP about. But proper volumes or darker colours and you would be asking a GP.

My GF's mum had bowel cancer and kicked it arse many years ago. My nana also had it and beat it in her seventies and this was many years (she's been dead for over 20 years, natural causes) ago so treatments have moved on now.

I remember with my nana there was clearly a reason to see a doctor as something was wrong. These were people who didn't bother doctors and had a stoic view in life so if they needed to call someone, something was very apparent.

[Capercrohnj]

She might have had ulcerative colitis which bleeding is a symptom of and also increases your colorectal cancer risk.

[swajj]

If I have gastritis I wont be well by not just stop reading about pancreatic cancer. But it eases my mental mind somehow though.

What? I must be reading that wrong because I read it as you saying that if you have gastritis it makes no difference if you read PC forums because it won’t cure your gastritis. Strange logic.

---------- Post added at 17:55 ---------- Previous post was at 17:44 ----------

Have you started looking in the mirror to see if your eyes are yellow? Studying your skin to see if it is yellow? Have you come across the story of the guy who died from PC after waking up one day and having violent diarrhoea? Then shortly after turning yellow? Did you read stuff like that after researching your symptoms?

That’s what you get out of Googling.

---------- Post added at 18:40 ---------- Previous post was at 17:55 ----------

The story of the guy I mentioned was what I found when I was researching my symptoms. It brought on weeks and weeks of misery. Looking in the mirror every few hours to see if my eyes had turned yellow. Looking at my skin constantly to see if it was yellow. Endless doctors visits. Emergency room visits. Unnecessary tests. And it was all thanks to Google.

[budgie1979]

Hey give you good drugs. The only uncomfortable thing is the spray in the mouth. I had one in March and another next week (I have crohn's so these tests aren't a HA thing). You are asleep during it.

Hemmorhoids are not a colonoscopy cancer red flag.

I just had an endoscopy yesterday (yay GERD), and it was a breeze. No spray in my mouth, just told me to bite down on a plastic thing, and then I was out and waking up minutes later in recovery. I actually felt better leaving than I did going in, because the oxygen and IV fluids knocked out the slight headache I woke up with. I think in some countries it is not standard practice to do the sedation, but if someone is extremely nervous about the procedure I would imagine they would offer something to at least take the edge off.

[Capercrohnj]

I just had an endoscopy yesterday (yay GERD), and it was a breeze. No spray in my mouth, just told me to bite down on a plastic thing, and then I was out and waking up minutes later in recovery. I actually felt better leaving than I did going in, because the oxygen and IV fluids knocked out the slight headache I woke up with. I think in some countries it is not standard practice to do the sedation, but if someone is extremely nervous about the procedure I would imagine they would offer something to at least take the edge off.

That's the last thing I remember too. They use the spray in some places to temporarily paralyze your gag reflex. It tastes gross but otherwise ok. When they use the spray you can't eat it drink for a few hours afterwards until it is back (you have to test it with a tongue depressor or something). No biggie. Way better than colonoscopy and no prep other than fasting after midnight.

[paranoid-viking]

That's a bit much. THe forums are full of people who actually HAVE the disease. They are the statistics, the 1 in 30 or 1 in 500 or 1 in 1,000,000. They are not on those forums to scare but to talk to each other about their diseases. And, yes, they are going to recommend medical action because they needed action.

When WE go to their boards, we are the trolls. We have no business there if we can't handle what we will see.

I think you misunderstood completely. I was suggesting that perhaps; just perhaps; that som scrupelous people are creating an account to spread scary stories. Such people do exists, believe me.

I agree 100% with you that people without cancer diagnosis have no business there however; and I would never sink to such low levels to post and spread my fear there. Some of the posts by hypocondriacs on cancer forums are quite disgusting; especially posts that goes like this:

"Hello, I have not been diagnosed yet but fully expect to be over the next few weeks. Rest assured I am not a hypochondriac, though one or two doctors have implied this (and how I wish they were right).
Anyway, over the last three and a half months I have experienced chronic, ominous and persistent symptoms that appear to point to nothing other than pancreatic cancer, despite the roughly one in two million odds of someone my age getting it( I have spent a lot of time reading up on it, who could blame me....)."

This was in fact posted on a cancer forum and all I have to say to this young boy is: "oh yes , you ARE a hypocondriac and your behaviour is slimey to trespass on the area of mortally ill people with your parranoia. Non-hypocondriacs dies not create profiles on cancer forums to ask cancer patients if they have cancer just bevause they have a stomach pain. I will not link to the rest of it but it is completely riddicilous. This bad behaving millenial hypocondriac only has a stomach pain and is therefore convinced he has PC. No it is not wrong to be a hypocondriac but trespassing on a cancer forum is. Would this boy say this right to the face of a real PC patient?
I guess this kid is aswell as being a hypocondriac the result of a bad upbringing.

---------- Post added at 01:15 ---------- Previous post was at 01:13 ----------


Spot on NervUs! I found this forum because I followed a couple of members here to give them a piece of my mind! (and I did). I ended up staying after reading a bit to try and help.

Imagine actually going through treatment and all the nasties and getting a poster on the boards the likes of a few current posting members. Imagine a dozen or more Head and Neck cancer sufferers reassuring someone and getting the same responses we see here? I can tell you the admins on those boards quickly identified and banned those members. The level of disrespect and self absorption certainly made many of us quite upset.



Did any of them try to justify their presence by denying they were hypocondriacs as in the excample I showed above?

---------- Post added at 01:29 ---------- Previous post was at 01:15 ----------




[/COLOR]

But did a doctor corroborate the 4 years of blood being connected? If not, this could be the person themselves joining up incorrect dots.

That is also the things. People posting on these forums are rarely if ever medical profesionals. Having a disease does not make on an excpert on the human anatomy and better qualified than doctors. I mean; blood in stool and NO OTHER SYMPTOMS for 4 years and it was cancer all along? Or was it? I guess it is all coincidence cause after all; colon cancer is also one of those cancers where the symptoms does not appear until it is advancing. You would believe that after 4 years the patient would have the cancer mestasised to other organs or probably be...well, dead. Right?
I mean; on one of the pancreatic cancer forums; I have read them yes; but I promise you I have never posted there; one claim that her grandmother or something had untreated pancreatic cancer for 20 years! And then it was found 2 months before she died. Believe it if you want, I dont. And another one claiming that their partner puked blood for 14 years before diagnosis. How come we never hear of people suffering for that many years AFTER diagnosis but instead that they die shortly after, even though they are under tratment. Does this mean that the conspirational theorist is right; that it is the treatment of cancer only that is dangerous and that cancer itself is not dangerous? The last question was sarcastic, I dont believe that.
But the point is; stories read on cancer forums should be taken woth grains of salt; trolling or not; there are confirmation bias and laymen knowledge of disease, these tales are not written by profesionals.
I know 2 who had colon cancer and none of them had mild symptoms for years.

---------- Post added at 01:33 ---------- Previous post was at 01:29 ----------


[QUOTE=MyNameIsTerry;1730508]

I used the troll language because the previous poster called sick people trolls for posting on their own boards :lac: I will cop to reading forums of the diseases I fear, but I do not make accounts or post.

T


I did not. Read again what I wrote. I was suggesting perhaps that someone MAY BE, just may be posting such tales to scare people. I was not concluding this as a fact, just as a possibility. It may be posted by someone with cancer(although having colon cancer in the 20s is extremely uncommon; chances of getting it at that age is close to zero), but even though she had it it does not mean that she may be mistaken un-realted conditions that was there BEFORE the cancer with the cancer; if the story is true I am almost 100% convinced it was. Did I clarify something now?

---------- Post added at 01:36 ---------- Previous post was at 01:33 ----------


Hey give you good drugs. The only uncomfortable thing is the spray in the mouth. I had one in March and another next week (I have crohn's so these tests aren't a HA thing). You are asleep during it.



Are you saying that they are giving you narcosis in Canada during a endoscopy? They are certainly not doing that in Norway; I checked with the local clinic here; they refuse to do it based on the chances of it being risky.Neither will they give you a valium shot. Just a placebo spray that does nothing. Same as when I had endoscopy 11 years ago.

---------- Post added at 01:38 ---------- Previous post was at 01:36 ----------


She might have had ulcerative colitis which bleeding is a symptom of and also increases your colorectal cancer risk.

That is WAY more likely than having colon cancer untreated for 4 years.

---------- Post added at 01:41 ---------- Previous post was at 01:38 ----------


What? I must be reading that wrong because I read it as you saying that if you have gastritis it makes no difference if you read PC forums because it won’t cure your gastritis. Strange logic.

---------- Post added at 17:55 ---------- Previous post was at 17:44 ----------

Have you started looking in the mirror to see if your eyes are yellow? Studying your skin to see if it is yellow? Have you come across the story of the guy who died from PC after waking up one day and having violent diarrhoea? Then shortly after turning yellow? Did you read stuff like that after researching your symptoms?

That’s what you get out of Googling.

---------- Post added at 18:40 ---------- Previous post was at 17:55 ----------

The story of the guy I mentioned was what I found when I was researching my symptoms. It brought on weeks and weeks of misery. Looking in the mirror every few hours to see if my eyes had turned yellow. Looking at my skin constantly to see if it was yellow. Endless doctors visits. Emergency room visits. Unnecessary tests. And it was all thanks to Google.


Oh yeah; I have did all that. Quite frightened. It is horror. And it has been going on for over a year now. I wished I had never ever read about pancreatic cancer. I wished I had zero knowledge that this type of cancer existed. Not to glorify the past; but my life was much better before I was exposed to this knowledge. But the most fritghtening stories I have come across are those of symptoms coming and going for years or misdiagnosis, stories of tumours that were not seen on ultrasounds and CTs but was there all the time. Murderously frightening and horryfying. Quite damgaing to the life quality. Why should anyone else than thos unfortunate to siffer from this know about such stories?

[MyNameIsTerry]

I did not. Read again what I wrote. I was suggesting perhaps that someone MAY BE, just may be posting such tales to scare people. I was not concluding this as a fact, just as a possibility. It may be posted by someone with cancer(although having colon cancer in the 20s is extremely uncommon; chances of getting it at that age is close to zero), but even though she had it it does not mean that she may be mistaken un-realted conditions that was there BEFORE the cancer with the cancer; if the story is true I am almost 100% convinced it was. Did I clarify something now?

Just to clarify, your response isn't to me despite it showing that way as the quotes got messed up in a previous post.

---------- Post added at 02:13 ---------- Previous post was at 02:00 ----------


That is also the things. People posting on these forums are rarely if ever medical profesionals. Having a disease does not make on an excpert on the human anatomy and better qualified than doctors. I mean; blood in stool and NO OTHER SYMPTOMS for 4 years and it was cancer all along? Or was it? I guess it is all coincidence cause after all; colon cancer is also one of those cancers where the symptoms does not appear until it is advancing. You would believe that after 4 years the patient would have the cancer mestasised to other organs or probably be...well, dead. Right?
I mean; on one of the pancreatic cancer forums; I have read them yes; but I promise you I have never posted there; one claim that her grandmother or something had untreated pancreatic cancer for 20 years! And then it was found 2 months before she died. Believe it if you want, I dont. And another one claiming that their partner puked blood for 14 years before diagnosis. How come we never hear of people suffering for that many years AFTER diagnosis but instead that they die shortly after, even though they are under tratment. Does this mean that the conspirational theorist is right; that it is the treatment of cancer only that is dangerous and that cancer itself is not dangerous? The last question was sarcastic, I dont believe that.
But the point is; stories read on cancer forums should be taken woth grains of salt; trolling or not; there are confirmation bias and laymen knowledge of disease, these tales are not written by profesionals.
I know 2 who had colon cancer and none of them had mild symptoms for years.

It's people making mistakes that people do. I've had asthma for over 30 years and I know a lot less about it because it has never been something I've been interested in looking into. Some people choose to do so, especially those who receive more complex treatment due to greater severity.

The same with any illness. How many anxiety sufferers have I come across who know very little about it? Lots. I was one of them for the first 5 years. In my relapse I changed my views about my doctor being my source of information and got learning. Therapy & peer support groups also gave me a springboard into learning.

Some will know lots, some little. You have to be careful, anyone can sound convincing. I've reported plenty of sellers on here posing as former or current anxieyt suffererss and they can sound like they know their stuff...yet the more you dig around in the anxiety sector you realise anyone could knock up a book in a very short time with very little or no knowledge because you piggyback. Then you sucker vulnerable people into buying your "cures" and sit back watching your turn key affiliate website earning bucks...one member on here was seen bragging about doing just that on a site for affiliate marketers and some of us outed him for it years ago. He's never been back.

So, some of the cases can just be people trying to help but making mistakes. I would imagine many a cancer sufferer sees through it like we would if they have clued themselves up on it. Admin's & more experienced members will be busy trying to reduce poor cases like that too.

Like you say, such cases would make medical history. They would be quoted in multiple texts around the world. Just look at cases where a drug is found to be bad or any other product? It is across national media worldwide.

To cancer sufferers it's going to be different to HAers. It's like writing an unlikely story on an ALS forum, those clued up with spot it for what it is whether it's malicious trolling or just lack of knowledge & whole load of incorrect assumptions. But HAers are also battling their minds which want to twist things into them thinking these stories could be valid. Just another reason you shouldn't be there really.

[Capercrohnj]

They sedate you here for the test. Best sleep ever.

[paranoid-viking]

They sedate you here for the test. Best sleep ever.

Wow. How lucky you are. Over here sedation is out of the question and you have to expose yourself to torture. Maybe I shall take my endoscopy abroad?

[pulisa]

Have you actually been referred for an endoscopy by a doctor?

[paranoid-viking]

Have you actually been referred for an endoscopy by a doctor?

Yes.

[KK77]

Wow. How lucky you are. Over here sedation is out of the question and you have to expose yourself to torture. Maybe I shall take my endoscopy abroad?

If you think an endoscopy is "torture", what would you call chemo and other radical cancer treatments?

Certainly not pleasant but I think you are exaggerating :lac:

[Annaboodle]

Wow. How lucky you are. Over here sedation is out of the question and you have to expose yourself to torture. Maybe I shall take my endoscopy abroad?

Honestly, sort your choice of words out: "Torture"? You're not Theon frickin' Greyjoy.

My mum had an endoscopy recently everyone and it was FINE. She made less fuss about it than you're making in your head in these posts.

[pulisa]

Exaggeration and hysteria seem to be acceptable when you have an anxiety disorder on here. Getting a perspective is perfectly possible....even with anxiety so no excuses.

[swajj]

Honestly, sort your choice of words out: "Torture"? You're not Theon frickin' Greyjoy.

My mum had an endoscopy recently everyone and it was FINE. She made less fuss about it than you're making in your head in these posts.

lol

[paranoid-viking]

If you think an endoscopy is "torture", what would you call chemo and other radical cancer treatments?

Certainly not pleasant but I think you are exaggerating :lac:

Irrelevant comparission.

---------- Post added at 12:23 ---------- Previous post was at 12:21 ----------




My mum had an endoscopy recently everyone and it was FINE. She made less fuss about it than you're making in your head in these posts.


I thought I wrote in another post; they dont use anesthesia for endoscopy in Norway. Or at least not in my district. Guess they consder it "risky" or something. You probbably heard of the Scandinavian nanny state - only a matter of time before they enforce wearing crash helmets for anyone walking across the street.

[KK77]

Irrelevant comparission.[COLOR="blue"]

.

Why is it "irrelevant"? Are you a snowflake or a china doll?

Maybe ask a cancer survivor what "torture" means...

I find your melodramatics insulting :lac:

[paranoid-viking]

Why is it "irrelevant"? Are you a snowflake or a china doll?

Maybe ask a cancer survivor what "torture" means...

I find your melodramatics insulting :lac:


Excuse me, but is name calling appropriate for this forum? I dont really like this and the tone you are setting here. This is a forum for anxiety sufferer, right?
Well, I guess it is up to the moderator to decide if name calling is acceptable.

[KK77]

Excuse me, but is name calling appropriate for this forum? I dont really like this and the tone you are setting here. This is a forum for anxiety sufferer, right?
Well, I guess it is up to the moderator to decide if name calling is acceptable.

Your tone was the initial problem and dismissing a comparison because it doesn't suit you. I'm not name calling - I'm drawing a comparison to your claim that an endoscopy is "torture".

You haven't answered my question either.

[paranoid-viking]

Your tone was the initial problem and dismissing a comparison because it doesn't suit you. I'm not name calling - I'm drawing a comparison to your claim that an endoscopy is "torture".

You haven't answered my question either.

Why? Should think about those who suffered in the holocaust be used as an argument to silence everyone who have a daily struggle of some kind? I disagree on that. And this is not a cancer forum, but an anxiety forum so if others neurotic disorders bothers youu then you are free not to post here.

[KK77]

Why? Should think about those who suffered in the holocaustbe used as an argument to silence everyone who have a daily struggle of some kind? I disagree on that. And this is not a cancer forum, but an anxiety forum so if others neurotic disorders bothers youu then you are free not to post here.

Don't twist the argument now: you were talking about "torture" in terms of physical pain, not mental pain - ie anxiety. Otherwise, why mention lack of pain relief?

Being anxious about a medical procedure is another matter. One I understand very well.

And your reference to the "holocaust" is TOTALLY irrelevant.

[paranoid-viking]

Whatever. I end this argument with you now. I am here to discuss anxiety not to participate in some sufferer olympics.:mad:

[KK77]

Next you'll be saying an endoscopy is worse than childbirth even though you're male :lac:

[Fishmanpa]

So PVike,

You asked about HA sufferers on the cancer forums. One poster started in February. His initial post got my spidey sense tingling.

Hi All -

I am at a point in my health scare issue that I could really use some advice. I am a 27-year old male, who for the most part would consider himself fairly healthy (used to work out 3-4 times a week, ate mostly greens, and would only occassionally drink on weekends), I was a smokeless tobacco user on and off for 7 years, however the last 3 months have been absolute hell and I feel that I am at a breaking point and could really use some advice.

Around mid-December, I went to see my GP about a slightly nagging left ear ache that was lingering from one of the worst sinus infections I had ever had in my life in the early part of October. At this appointment, the GP gave me a 6-day steroid and sent me on my way. A week's time passes and it is now Friday, December 23rd and I have been studying all day and head over to my girlfriend's house to check on the place as she was out of town. When I go to use the restroom I noticed that my left eyelid is droopy and that the pupil in my left eye is much larger than the pupil in the right eye. At this point I am a bit freaked out, but try not to think too much into it and rationalize that it might be due to studying all day. I head to my parent's house for the Christmas weekend and once I arrive, I look at myself in the mirror again and also notice that my tongue in the back, on the left side, sits higher in my mouth than my tongue on the right side. Additionally, it seems like my toungue is almost too big for my mouth. So my next instinct is to call my GP and get a reference list of ENTs so that I can go to them and get things squared away.

I meet with the ENT on January 4th and he performs an oral cavity screening and trans-nasal endoscopy and doesn't see anything in the back of my throat, but sends me to get a CT scan of my sinuses. Everything comes back clear and I try to go back to work and life, after having the slight freak out. However, over the next month my tongue continues to feel like it is increasing in size - it is honestly a weird feeling but I can hardly get food through the oral cavity - and I also notice that my throat is producing a ton of excess saliva. I have what look to be bubbles of spit that form on the pillar and uvula and go down to my tongue. Additionally, the amount of mucus and white foam that coats my tongue at any one time is quite alarming. I have been in client meetings where I have to stop and ask for water because I cannot swallow the foamy mucus or clear my throat.

So I go back to my ENT on the 31st of January to get a second opinion and he now says that the tonsils, on both sides of the base of my tonuge, are swollen and gives me some amoxicillin to clear things up. After my 10-day prescription is over things had not improved, if anything they are getting worse. The ear pain on my left side is quite horrible, the foamy mucus is a constant issue, and my tongue feels like it is still quite fatty/too big for my mouth and throat. The droopy eye and enlarged pupil is still an issue, too. Furthermore, I have become quite distraught over all this and my work life is suffering and I know I am starting a scary downward spiral. I have a follow-up appointment with the ENT on Friday and at this point I am honestly looking for any advice on what questions I should be asking him, what test I should be having ran, etc. to rule out any sort of oral/base of tongue cancer. Does this even sound like throat cancer, as I now think non-stop that I dipped too many years and have caused too much harm to my body. I know it is quite deplorable to come to a cancer site and ask for advice when I haven't even been diagnosed, but I honestly am so broken at this point any source of direction would be greatly appreciated. If you made it to this point, thank you and I look forward to hearing from you.




He's seen multiple doctors, has had more testing than I did as well as TWO biopsies! He's gone to a CCC and they can't find anything wrong. He's been reassured by cancer patients, survivors and their loved ones multiple times yet he still believes it's cancer and posted....



I know I have created several threads, with the last one mentioning that it would be my last thread, but I am just really confused and looking for help. As noted in previous threads, I have had multiple biopsy completed for a spot on my lip that I was concerned about. First biopsy was completed early August and just had a second biopsy that I am looking to have back in the next week or so. Also had a fine needle biopsy completed October 2nd for a lymph node that popped up and did not respond to antibiotics. The thing hasn't grown, but is hard and doesn't hurt. From the onset, I thought something was off and have done my own research as to different signs and symptoms and one of things that startled me was a presentation that I found that noted how buccal mucosa cancer travels via lymphatic system. It stated the following:

- Submandibular & upper deep cervical involved (that is where the one lymph node is, that I had FNA biopsied on October 2nd)

- Initially mobile - hard and nodular

- Later fixed to deeper structure

- Infiltrate into hypoglossal nerve

- Infiltrate into spinal accessory nerve (noticed about a week ago that my right side trap muscle has atrophied and now my whole neck feels like fat and no muscle at all, can tell something is wrong because I just got the chills across my body, except for the neck and back area on my right side)

- Cervical Sympathetic Chain - Horners Syndrome (began developing last week as well; small pupil, droopy eyelid, etc - also noted a pain in my back that is related to this last week)

- Compression on External carotid artery



So my question is, with all the tell-tale signs - including facial paralysis on the right side as well, how can this be missed? I honestly don't get it. In this time frame, I have had 2 CT Scans and an MRI. Wouldn't you think 2x CT scans, Incisional Biopsy, Lymph node Biopsy, and MRI would pick up something remotely funny? Additionally, does this seem like it is moving way too fast? Is 10 weeks after noticing the ulcer long enough for all these symptoms to occur, or do you think there is something else going on? The only weird thing that has been discovered at all is that my ENT did a scope and he noted that my Eustachian tube wasn't closing properly. Not sure if that is due to nerve involvement of the tumor, or what. Again, would think this would be picked up on the MRI, but what do I know.

I have an appointment scheduled with an oncologist and neurologist on Monday, but it seems like I am just deteriorating so quickly, those won't even matter. For what it is worth, my MRI which stated what I was experiencing had the following dictation:

"No acute abnormality is seen in the visualized portion of the brain. No abnormal marrow signal is seen in the visualized osseous structures in the neck. Mild mucosal thickening is seen in the ethmoid sinuses. Mastoid air cells are clear. No mass is seen in the orbits, cavernous sinuses, pterygopalatine fossae, retropharynx, parotid glands, palatine tonsils, tongue, submandibular glands, and thyroid. Epiglottis has normal thickness. Piriform sinuses are patent."

Also, "No mass, fluid collection, or adenopathy is seen in the Neck. No cystic or necrotic cervical lymph node is seen. No cellulitis or abscess is seen in the neck."

My whole theory is there is some sort of perineural invasion going on and being missed by the doctors, as I know this is hard to detect for radiologist and would explain several of my symptoms, but how would y'all go about confirming this or even getting someone to look for this? Doctors seem to be so put off the second you try to explain what you think is going on in your body. Again, I am in desperation mode. Sorry for the ramble.



Does this pattern read and sound familiar? The tons of Dr. Google research, perceived symptoms that trained medical professionals don't see? Not believing the professionals? I find it insulting that he's still posting on a cancer forum close to a year since all this started for him. I stated my opinion as such.

I hope that answers your question.

Positive thoughts

[KK77]

Despicable behaviour Fish. These people should be banned. As you said on another thread - HA can really be a selfish and egotistical illness - all centred on the ME.

PV obviously has no more to say. He seems to think I'm here to play mind games :lac:

[paranoid-viking]

Next you'll be saying an endoscopy is worse than childbirth even though you're male :lac:

Your words, not mine. Can we end this sh*t now? This is turning the discussion into a trash can.

---------- Post added at 15:44 ---------- Previous post was at 15:43 ----------


Despicable behaviour Fish. These people should be banned. As you said on another thread - HA can really be a selfish and egotistical illness - all centred on the ME.

PV obviously has no more to say. He seems to think I'm here to play mind games :lac:

I am not posting on cancer forums so why do you bring me into this? Shall we quit this nonsene game now?

---------- Post added at 15:49 ---------- Previous post was at 15:44 ----------


So PVike,

You asked about HA sufferers on the cancer forums. One poster started in February. His initial post got my spidey sense tingling.

Hi All -

I am at a point in my health scare issue that I could really use some advice. I am a 27-year old male, who for the most part would consider himself fairly healthy (used to work out 3-4 times a week, ate mostly greens, and would only occassionally drink on weekends), I was a smokeless tobacco user on and off for 7 years, however the last 3 months have been absolute hell and I feel that I am at a breaking point and could really use some advice.

Around mid-December, I went to see my GP about a slightly nagging left ear ache that was lingering from one of the worst sinus infections I had ever had in my life in the early part of October. At this appointment, the GP gave me a 6-day steroid and sent me on my way. A week's time passes and it is now Friday, December 23rd and I have been studying all day and head over to my girlfriend's house to check on the place as she was out of town. When I go to use the restroom I noticed that my left eyelid is droopy and that the pupil in my left eye is much larger than the pupil in the right eye. At this point I am a bit freaked out, but try not to think too much into it and rationalize that it might be due to studying all day. I head to my parent's house for the Christmas weekend and once I arrive, I look at myself in the mirror again and also notice that my tongue in the back, on the left side, sits higher in my mouth than my tongue on the right side. Additionally, it seems like my toungue is almost too big for my mouth. So my next instinct is to call my GP and get a reference list of ENTs so that I can go to them and get things squared away.

I meet with the ENT on January 4th and he performs an oral cavity screening and trans-nasal endoscopy and doesn't see anything in the back of my throat, but sends me to get a CT scan of my sinuses. Everything comes back clear and I try to go back to work and life, after having the slight freak out. However, over the next month my tongue continues to feel like it is increasing in size - it is honestly a weird feeling but I can hardly get food through the oral cavity - and I also notice that my throat is producing a ton of excess saliva. I have what look to be bubbles of spit that form on the pillar and uvula and go down to my tongue. Additionally, the amount of mucus and white foam that coats my tongue at any one time is quite alarming. I have been in client meetings where I have to stop and ask for water because I cannot swallow the foamy mucus or clear my throat.

So I go back to my ENT on the 31st of January to get a second opinion and he now says that the tonsils, on both sides of the base of my tonuge, are swollen and gives me some amoxicillin to clear things up. After my 10-day prescription is over things had not improved, if anything they are getting worse. The ear pain on my left side is quite horrible, the foamy mucus is a constant issue, and my tongue feels like it is still quite fatty/too big for my mouth and throat. The droopy eye and enlarged pupil is still an issue, too. Furthermore, I have become quite distraught over all this and my work life is suffering and I know I am starting a scary downward spiral. I have a follow-up appointment with the ENT on Friday and at this point I am honestly looking for any advice on what questions I should be asking him, what test I should be having ran, etc. to rule out any sort of oral/base of tongue cancer. Does this even sound like throat cancer, as I now think non-stop that I dipped too many years and have caused too much harm to my body. I know it is quite deplorable to come to a cancer site and ask for advice when I haven't even been diagnosed, but I honestly am so broken at this point any source of direction would be greatly appreciated. If you made it to this point, thank you and I look forward to hearing from you.




He's seen multiple doctors, has had more testing than I did as well as TWO biopsies! He's gone to a CCC and they can't find anything wrong. He's been reassured by cancer patients, survivors and their loved ones multiple times yet he still believes it's cancer and posted....



I know I have created several threads, with the last one mentioning that it would be my last thread, but I am just really confused and looking for help. As noted in previous threads, I have had multiple biopsy completed for a spot on my lip that I was concerned about. First biopsy was completed early August and just had a second biopsy that I am looking to have back in the next week or so. Also had a fine needle biopsy completed October 2nd for a lymph node that popped up and did not respond to antibiotics. The thing hasn't grown, but is hard and doesn't hurt. From the onset, I thought something was off and have done my own research as to different signs and symptoms and one of things that startled me was a presentation that I found that noted how buccal mucosa cancer travels via lymphatic system. It stated the following:

- Submandibular & upper deep cervical involved (that is where the one lymph node is, that I had FNA biopsied on October 2nd)

- Initially mobile - hard and nodular

- Later fixed to deeper structure

- Infiltrate into hypoglossal nerve

- Infiltrate into spinal accessory nerve (noticed about a week ago that my right side trap muscle has atrophied and now my whole neck feels like fat and no muscle at all, can tell something is wrong because I just got the chills across my body, except for the neck and back area on my right side)

- Cervical Sympathetic Chain - Horners Syndrome (began developing last week as well; small pupil, droopy eyelid, etc - also noted a pain in my back that is related to this last week)

- Compression on External carotid artery



So my question is, with all the tell-tale signs - including facial paralysis on the right side as well, how can this be missed? I honestly don't get it. In this time frame, I have had 2 CT Scans and an MRI. Wouldn't you think 2x CT scans, Incisional Biopsy, Lymph node Biopsy, and MRI would pick up something remotely funny? Additionally, does this seem like it is moving way too fast? Is 10 weeks after noticing the ulcer long enough for all these symptoms to occur, or do you think there is something else going on? The only weird thing that has been discovered at all is that my ENT did a scope and he noted that my Eustachian tube wasn't closing properly. Not sure if that is due to nerve involvement of the tumor, or what. Again, would think this would be picked up on the MRI, but what do I know.

I have an appointment scheduled with an oncologist and neurologist on Monday, but it seems like I am just deteriorating so quickly, those won't even matter. For what it is worth, my MRI which stated what I was experiencing had the following dictation:

"No acute abnormality is seen in the visualized portion of the brain. No abnormal marrow signal is seen in the visualized osseous structures in the neck. Mild mucosal thickening is seen in the ethmoid sinuses. Mastoid air cells are clear. No mass is seen in the orbits, cavernous sinuses, pterygopalatine fossae, retropharynx, parotid glands, palatine tonsils, tongue, submandibular glands, and thyroid. Epiglottis has normal thickness. Piriform sinuses are patent."

Also, "No mass, fluid collection, or adenopathy is seen in the Neck. No cystic or necrotic cervical lymph node is seen. No cellulitis or abscess is seen in the neck."

My whole theory is there is some sort of perineural invasion going on and being missed by the doctors, as I know this is hard to detect for radiologist and would explain several of my symptoms, but how would y'all go about confirming this or even getting someone to look for this? Doctors seem to be so put off the second you try to explain what you think is going on in your body. Again, I am in desperation mode. Sorry for the ramble.



Does this pattern read and sound familiar? The tons of Dr. Google research, perceived symptoms that trained medical professionals don't see? Not believing the professionals? I find it insulting that he's still posting on a cancer forum close to a year since all this started for him. I stated my opinion as such.

I hope that answers your question.

Positive thoughts


It is quite interesting to observe that the hypocondriacs posting on cancer forums are quite young. It tells you a bit about their upringing or rather the lack of it. If I caught anyone in my home that I know with HA there would be sanctions, first and foremost on access to Internet.

[KK77]

Your words, not mine. Can we end this sh*t now? This is turning the discussion into a trash can.

---------- Post added at 15:44 ---------- Previous post was at 15:43 ----------



I am not posting on cancer forums so why do you bring me into this? Shall we quit this nonsene game now?

It stunk like a "trash can" long before I joined this thread.

And I didn't "bring" you into anything - Fish did - so reply accordingly ;)

[paranoid-viking]

It stunk like a "trash can" long before I joined this thread.

And I didn't "bring" you into anything - Fish did - so reply accordingly ;)

And you had to smaer me in a reply to him. Very nice.

[KK77]

Be very careful in what you say. I didn't mention you or slander you in any way. I responded to Fish's post on your thread. So don't play your manipulative games with me because I knocked your jaw out of place.

[Fishmanpa]

It is quite interesting to observe that the hypocondriacs posting on cancer forums are quite young. It tells you a bit about their upringing or rather the lack of it. If I caught anyone in my home that I know with HA there would be sanctions, first and foremost on access to Internet.

While I believe there are some environmental factors involved as upbringing, I disagree that it's the explanation of the behavior. And what I posted was just an example. The age range of HA sufferers posting on disease forums runs the full gamut from teens to seniors.

My observations of the posts show the symptoms of the mental illness itself. The self absorbed behavior and mindset. The OCD tendencies of research and Dr. Google etc. Scruples seem to go by the wayside with most sufferers when they're in a spiral as often illustrated here.

Positive thoughts

[paranoid-viking]

While I believe there are some environmental factors involved as upbringing, I disagree that it's the explanation of the behavior. And what I posted was just an example. The age range of HA sufferers posting on disease forums runs the full gamut from teens to seniors.

My observations of the posts show the symptoms of the mental illness itself. The self absorbed behavior and mindset. The OCD tendencies of research and Dr. Google etc. Scruples seem to go by the wayside with most sufferers when they're in a spiral as often illustrated here.

Positive thoughts

As a ferociuos hypocondriac myself I undestand the mindset that makes it tempting to posting ones fear on a forum for cancer patients(they are despertate)but it is wrong, and I have decency enough to never do such a thing. It goes against my moral standard. Plus; there are no reassurance. I see that many of them get confimation bias aswell; which is obviously the complete opposite of what they were looking for. But - they asked for it. No one was forcing them to write there. So they should post their worries HERE. Or maybe on the Patient Info forum. Although THAT forum is full of trolls and misleading information.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Never say never.

It's easy to judge but I'm wary of how ill someone may be. If someone is ill enough to commit suicide, posting on a cancer forum seems a lesser issue. The same with people ill enough to be sectioned.

Those not to such a severity are a different matter though.

It's obviously wrong but it's complicated. They should rightly be removed though.

I suspect there are multiple possibilities. Some people don't care that much and have degrees of selfishness in their personalities already. It's a myth that anxiety makes you a lovely caring person, I've come across some disgraceful anxiety sufferers (including on NMP). But when we get into severe sufferers I'm wary of the single mindedness of obsessive cycles where you are chasing something and insight has slipped. When I spent a year at my worst it ruled me big time, I just couldn't stop even though it would also be wrong to say I couldn't take control either. It's hard to describe, it's not psychosis in any way or comparable, but "the pull" was so strong & exhausting.

[venusbluejeans]

Closed pending admin review