Your tips that work??

[bingjam]

Sooooo.... even though my anxiety hasn't been 'that' recently I've been struggling with panic attacks for a little while.
Any social events, going out with friends, crowded places I have panic attacks.

Anyway on Saturday I have a wedding to go to, it's an all day event, 1pm through to 12pm I'm going to be in places I can't get out of that easy (like when they do their vows) and there is going to be a lot of people there too obviously. So in my head I know I'm going to be anxious and or have a panic attack at some point but I don't want to embarrass myself in front of all those people and I don't want to 'ruin' their day

Has anyone got any tips for me if I feel a panic attack coming on or if I actually can't stop it and I'm having a panic attack. I normally have to get out of the place I'm in asap but I want to try and stay where I am and get past it

Any tips would be highly appreciated

[Fishmanpa]

The best help is the help you give yourself! http://cbt4panic.org/

Positive thoughts

[ServerError]

Accept it. Don't fight it. Don't try to will it away. Feel it. Let it do whatever it wants to do. Observe it. Do whatever you were going to do anyway. Teach yourself not to fear it, because it isn't harmful and it can't hurt you.

[snowflake293]

My husband used to suffer like this. Luckily my anxiety usually passes and I rarely get that feeling that I just need to get out, but he used to get it a lot especially in places like restaurants, theatres, cinema etc... he said he would try and let the feelings wash over him and that helped. It is so hard though, I really understand! I hope it goes ok for you. I get anxious before events as I worry about being around people/feeling ill/being ill. Hope it all goes well x

[bingjam]

The best help is the help you give yourself! http://cbt4panic.org/

Positive thoughts


Thanks fish. I've just been reading through for half an hour will carry on reading when I take a bath later

---------- Post added at 18:10 ---------- Previous post was at 18:09 ----------


My husband used to suffer like this. Luckily my anxiety usually passes and I rarely get that feeling that I just need to get out, but he used to get it a lot especially in places like restaurants, theatres, cinema etc... he said he would try and let the feelings wash over him and that helped. It is so hard though, I really understand! I hope it goes ok for you. I get anxious before events as I worry about being around people/feeling ill/being ill. Hope it all goes well x


I honestly know I need to work on my anxiety. I go through these phases where I struggle so much with panic attacks I end up not wanting to leave the house incase another one come on. Can't seem to stop them once they start again and they just suddenly stop for a period of time.

---------- Post added at 18:14 ---------- Previous post was at 18:10 ----------


My husband used to suffer like this. Luckily my anxiety usually passes and I rarely get that feeling that I just need to get out, but he used to get it a lot especially in places like restaurants, theatres, cinema etc... he said he would try and let the feelings wash over him and that helped. It is so hard though, I really understand! I hope it goes ok for you. I get anxious before events as I worry about being around people/feeling ill/being ill. Hope it all goes well x

Oh no I feel for your husband it's the worst thing in the world when it just stops me doing what I enjoy doing and constantly leaves me on edge. I'm the same with the cinema and restaurants. I always try to just ignore it then I just get really warm and that's what pushes me over. I hate being hot it just makes me feel uneasy. Never ending cycle. I just worry about embarrassing myself in front of hundreds of people.
The only good thing is my husband will be with me all day and when I'm out without him and have a panic attack I automatically rush home as he's sort of my comfort blanket. He knows exactly what to do and I just feel super safe when he's there. So hopefully I'll just have a panic free day or at worse if I do panic he's there. I just don't want to freak out during their ceremony. I would be mortified and would feel really guilty

[snowflake293]

My husband is my comfort blanket too x

[ServerError]

The only good thing is my husband will be with me all day and when I'm out without him and have a panic attack I automatically rush home as he's sort of my comfort blanket. He knows exactly what to do and I just feel super safe when he's there. So hopefully I'll just have a panic free day or at worse if I do panic he's there. I just don't want to freak out during their ceremony. I would be mortified and would feel really guilty

It sounds like you have an excellent support pillar there in your husband. It's great to have someone to rely on and fall back on.

That said, I think the seeds of your continued suffering are sown within this paragraph. If your reaction to a panic attack is to rush home to "safety", you will continue to teach yourself and your limbic system that there is a danger to be escaped from. Every time you run away, you reinforce the idea that you need protecting from whatever arises. These learned behaviours become more entrenched. In the moment, you'll feel a sense of relief as you "escape" that may actually feel very pleasant indeed. But it does no long-term good. You may find yourself riven with feelings of guilt or just disappointment that you didn't stick it out. And all the while, you teach the primitive part of your brain that tries to protect you that this behaviour is correct and this protection needed.

If you focus too much on hoping you won't panic, what subject is your mind filled with? Panic, presumably. Which, in turn, increases your chances of actually panicking. Now, I'm not saying don't think about it. It's impossible to do that. I could tell you not to the think of a green giraffe, but in order to do that, you first have to picture the green giraffe. What I'm saying is that you need to let more into your life in that moment than just panic. Allow yourself to be absorbed by your environment and what you're doing. Panic will still come, because you aren't recovered yet and you are trying to break long-established patterns of behaviour. But you see the panic through rather than react to it. You ALWAYS see the panic through, rather than react to it. Gradually, over time, your brain starts to learn that these surges of energy it triggers in order to try to help you aren't actually needed, and life becomes a considerably less stressful, more manageable and peaceful affair.

It's not easy, but you can do everything I've just described and more. If I can do it, you certainly can.

[Bearandbean]

I have the 'run' feeling now and then. If I know I'm going to a situation where I'll worry the day before or on the day I do the following:

1. Sir or lay somewhere quite and imagine myself in that situation with no worries and no fear. I'm just having a good time, I'm here with friends, i've got my favourite outfit on, I'm enjoying myself.
2. If I feel the worry building up when I'm in the situation I daydream. I think about walking along a beach with my boyfriend, we're totally relaxed and enjoying the scenery. We're happy and we have no cares in the world.
3. Think about other times I've been in this exact/similar situation and had no worries, no fears, just enjoyed myself. This time is the exact same, I know I'm fine and I know that the feeling will pass.
4. If I feel fear I focus on something that means my mind is having to think and process data. It might sound weird, but I've counted the number of people wearing glasses, I've counted the number of stripes on someone's shirt, I've counted from 100 backwards.

I think because it's so soon distraction will be your friend. In the long term you can most definitely work on overcoming panic, I couldn't even think about a train a year ago and last weekend I went on a train for 30mi items on my own.

You can do it!

[bingjam]

It sounds like you have an excellent support pillar there in your husband. It's great to have someone to rely on and fall back on.

That said, I think the seeds of your continued suffering are sown within this paragraph. If your reaction to a panic attack is to rush home to "safety", you will continue to teach yourself and your limbic system that there is a danger to be escaped from. Every time you run away, you reinforce the idea that you need protecting from whatever arises. These learned behaviours become more entrenched. In the moment, you'll feel a sense of relief as you "escape" that may actually feel very pleasant indeed. But it does no long-term good. You may find yourself riven with feelings of guilt or just disappointment that you didn't stick it out. And all the while, you teach the primitive part of your brain that tries to protect you that this behaviour is correct and this protection needed.

If you focus too much on hoping you won't panic, what subject is your mind filled with? Panic, presumably. Which, in turn, increases your chances of actually panicking. Now, I'm not saying don't think about it. It's impossible to do that. I could tell you not to the think of a green giraffe, but in order to do that, you first have to picture the green giraffe. What I'm saying is that you need to let more into your life in that moment than just panic. Allow yourself to be absorbed by your environment and what you're doing. Panic will still come, because you aren't recovered yet and you are trying to break long-established patterns of behaviour. But you see the panic through rather than react to it. You ALWAYS see the panic through, rather than react to it. Gradually, over time, your brain starts to learn that these surges of energy it triggers in order to try to help you aren't actually needed, and life becomes a considerably less stressful, more manageable and peaceful affair.

It's not easy, but you can do everything I've just described and more. If I can do it, you certainly can.

Yes he certainly is very understanding about it all, he had a random panic attacks also, but only when he was very stressed and he doesn't have anxiety and not many things scare him but when he had the one panic attack he was terrified. It was a few years ago now when he was 27 and he rang his mum... so he knows how scary they are so I think that's why he's so supportive.

Thank you for the advice I will totally take it on board

---------- Post added at 20:21 ---------- Previous post was at 20:19 ----------


I have the 'run' feeling now and then. If I know I'm going to a situation where I'll worry the day before or on the day I do the following:

1. Sir or lay somewhere quite and imagine myself in that situation with no worries and no fear. I'm just having a good time, I'm here with friends, i've got my favourite outfit on, I'm enjoying myself.
2. If I feel the worry building up when I'm in the situation I daydream. I think about walking along a beach with my boyfriend, we're totally relaxed and enjoying the scenery. We're happy and we have no cares in the world.
3. Think about other times I've been in this exact/similar situation and had no worries, no fears, just enjoyed myself. This time is the exact same, I know I'm fine and I know that the feeling will pass.
4. If I feel fear I focus on something that means my mind is having to think and process data. It might sound weird, but I've counted the number of people wearing glasses, I've counted the number of stripes on someone's shirt, I've counted from 100 backwards.

I think because it's so soon distraction will be your friend. In the long term you can most definitely work on overcoming panic, I couldn't even think about a train a year ago and last weekend I went on a train for 30mi items on my own.

You can do it!

Thank you for your advice. I will totally try it on Saturday. I keep telling myself I'm not going to panic but in the back of my mind I'm like but what if I do. It's so annoying. Well done on getting on the train by yourself I couldn't do that right now. Hopefully I'll get to the stage where I can do things alone. :hugs: