nononono
17-11-17, 21:45
trigger warning for extensive description of symptoms and gross stuff i've done to myself mid freakout:
it's been a while since i post anything here since my HIV scare and subsequent perianal abscess a year and a half ago.
luckily the abscess got drained and was no biggie but i most likely developed a fistula from that since it's reoccured 3 times but since i know the mechanics behind it -- also, i found packing garlic 2-3 times a day on the abscess and eating raw cloves, also like 2- 3 times a day does wonders and makes it heal in like 3 days, i don't freak out too much about it (even if it's annoying and disabling as hell).
anyway, a little background. i've had gastritis (probably GERD) since i'm 11 (i'm 24 now). also had IBS-D for about 3 years and a half now after a horrible salmonella typhi bout which lasted for about a month, emaciated me and ruined my guts for life so now my alternate between my "remission" states, random bouts of diarrhea or just searing pain in my gut before any BM, but never constipation, so in short my gut in general has not known peace and i'm always feeling like crap.
On top of all of that, my mom was recently diagnosed with stage IV stomach cancer after years and years of GI issues and a year and or so of going from doctor to doctor to find out the cause of her dysphagia and random bouts of vomit, making my HA go haywire.
So, until about a month ago my IBS was doing ok, only flared up when i drank or got really stressed or ate food that didn't agree with me, but overall fine.
****************************TMI******************* ************
then, i started presenting bright red bleeding after BMs (i strain a lot) and checked my butt and i had what looked like an external hemorrhoid so i took action by taking an over the counter treatment which did help me for a few months and the -apparent- hemorrhoid subsided so i thought none of it and carried on with my life.
this has been on and off for a few months, but more often than not i present no issues
fast forward a few months and now i am extremely constipated (probably fecal impaction), have a lot of migratory dull cramps (but the one that has stood out and the most and that has been the most frequent is the one in the mcburney point), present nause, right flank pain, and now have a huge anal fissure and 3 bleeding tiny bumps around the size of a sesame seed (used to be 2 about a 2 weeks ago)from straining that i could only see with a mirror and while opening my butthole (they're not in the entrance but very near). oh, and the perianal abscess re-occured on top of all of that
so naturally, i freaked out and started frantically googling, so it turns i now have bowel/rectal/anal cancer and/or chronic appendicitis /s.
my next doctor's appt is in one week .so i decided to waste no time and stick my finger up my butthole as far as i could and -to my relief- i've found no bumps so far, but i can only reach so far.
Now, yesterday for whatever reason, i had some real bad sciatica pain which radiated to my foot which all of a sudden stopped and i started getting random stabbing nerve pains which also subsided all of a sudden, which really had me worried
so rather, than having you guys diagnose me, my question is : HOW do i stop freaking out and carving through my own innards (which is probably doing more harm than good) till my next doctor's appointment when all of a sudden i started feeling so crappy and presenting a bunch of seemingly unrelated symptoms but that when i think and google hard enough could point to bowel or anal cancer
i really need to chill because it's only making my symptoms worse, please help me
it's been a while since i post anything here since my HIV scare and subsequent perianal abscess a year and a half ago.
luckily the abscess got drained and was no biggie but i most likely developed a fistula from that since it's reoccured 3 times but since i know the mechanics behind it -- also, i found packing garlic 2-3 times a day on the abscess and eating raw cloves, also like 2- 3 times a day does wonders and makes it heal in like 3 days, i don't freak out too much about it (even if it's annoying and disabling as hell).
anyway, a little background. i've had gastritis (probably GERD) since i'm 11 (i'm 24 now). also had IBS-D for about 3 years and a half now after a horrible salmonella typhi bout which lasted for about a month, emaciated me and ruined my guts for life so now my alternate between my "remission" states, random bouts of diarrhea or just searing pain in my gut before any BM, but never constipation, so in short my gut in general has not known peace and i'm always feeling like crap.
On top of all of that, my mom was recently diagnosed with stage IV stomach cancer after years and years of GI issues and a year and or so of going from doctor to doctor to find out the cause of her dysphagia and random bouts of vomit, making my HA go haywire.
So, until about a month ago my IBS was doing ok, only flared up when i drank or got really stressed or ate food that didn't agree with me, but overall fine.
****************************TMI******************* ************
then, i started presenting bright red bleeding after BMs (i strain a lot) and checked my butt and i had what looked like an external hemorrhoid so i took action by taking an over the counter treatment which did help me for a few months and the -apparent- hemorrhoid subsided so i thought none of it and carried on with my life.
this has been on and off for a few months, but more often than not i present no issues
fast forward a few months and now i am extremely constipated (probably fecal impaction), have a lot of migratory dull cramps (but the one that has stood out and the most and that has been the most frequent is the one in the mcburney point), present nause, right flank pain, and now have a huge anal fissure and 3 bleeding tiny bumps around the size of a sesame seed (used to be 2 about a 2 weeks ago)from straining that i could only see with a mirror and while opening my butthole (they're not in the entrance but very near). oh, and the perianal abscess re-occured on top of all of that
so naturally, i freaked out and started frantically googling, so it turns i now have bowel/rectal/anal cancer and/or chronic appendicitis /s.
my next doctor's appt is in one week .so i decided to waste no time and stick my finger up my butthole as far as i could and -to my relief- i've found no bumps so far, but i can only reach so far.
Now, yesterday for whatever reason, i had some real bad sciatica pain which radiated to my foot which all of a sudden stopped and i started getting random stabbing nerve pains which also subsided all of a sudden, which really had me worried
so rather, than having you guys diagnose me, my question is : HOW do i stop freaking out and carving through my own innards (which is probably doing more harm than good) till my next doctor's appointment when all of a sudden i started feeling so crappy and presenting a bunch of seemingly unrelated symptoms but that when i think and google hard enough could point to bowel or anal cancer
i really need to chill because it's only making my symptoms worse, please help me