AnxiousTeen97
21-11-17, 01:49
I recently turned 20. Since 11 or 12 my life has been all ups and downs, had good times, had to go through hell. It all started with the vision problems, to this day I do have that problem! A double vision on nearby objects that are unfocused, I will give a simple example: The PC screen and the hand. If I put my hand in a distance between my face and the PC screen whenever I am focused on the PC screen the hand will appear blurry and doubled, but if I switch the focus to the hand the hand goes back to normal but the background is blurry/doubled. I have had over thousands of symptoms I can assure you. It would take days to explain everything here. My heart beats fast during the day like 90-100+ bpm. It lessens during the nights. I am in pains due to my posture and mild scoliosis. Whenever I lay on my left side it feels like my heart beats slower and sometimes even interesting and I get a weird feeling mostly on my throat. I do feel like out of breath most of the time, that area on the upper stomach (where the ribs divide) feels weird like full. Guess what I do not look sick on the outside! I have done SO MANY tests that I feel like doctors are useless.
I've had every heart test possible.
CT of head.
Tons of blood tests.
I would feel out of breath and dizzy/weak while trying to sleep but thankfully that has gone away now, SO MANY symptoms I have had even worse.
I have come to a point where I curse everything, am I so hated by the creator?
Not knowing what you have, not being able to know let's say, constantly thinking about the worst scenarios, the worst possibilities, why do others have to worry about different problems like every normal person, especially at my age.
Nothing helps.
I am trapped.
From heart attacks to strokes, to cancers, to autoimmune illnesses, to every possible fatal illness out there.
I do not have enough money to go through every tests at private hospitals, since the last summer I quit visiting doctors and internet pages. But nothing has helped. If there is something to happen, THEN LET IT HAPPEN ALREADY SO I KNOW WHAT THE DEAL IS, TIRED OF EVERYTHING.
I am crying right now because of not knowing what to do. I AM SO TIRED PSYCHOLOGICALLY, GUIDE ME PLEASE.
I've had every heart test possible.
CT of head.
Tons of blood tests.
I would feel out of breath and dizzy/weak while trying to sleep but thankfully that has gone away now, SO MANY symptoms I have had even worse.
I have come to a point where I curse everything, am I so hated by the creator?
Not knowing what you have, not being able to know let's say, constantly thinking about the worst scenarios, the worst possibilities, why do others have to worry about different problems like every normal person, especially at my age.
Nothing helps.
I am trapped.
From heart attacks to strokes, to cancers, to autoimmune illnesses, to every possible fatal illness out there.
I do not have enough money to go through every tests at private hospitals, since the last summer I quit visiting doctors and internet pages. But nothing has helped. If there is something to happen, THEN LET IT HAPPEN ALREADY SO I KNOW WHAT THE DEAL IS, TIRED OF EVERYTHING.
I am crying right now because of not knowing what to do. I AM SO TIRED PSYCHOLOGICALLY, GUIDE ME PLEASE.