View Full Version : I may have MS (or something neurological)
ServerError
25-11-17, 20:52
It started a couple of weeks ago with a strange sensation in one of my toes. Kind of like a numbness, but also as if something was touching it when it wasn't. That seems to have spread to other toes and now I'm feeling it in my hands.
Was seen in A&E today and passed a neuro exam but I've got to go to my GP and get an appointment with a neurologist. Suffice to say I'm fretting.
Did the A&E doctor say that you may have MS or is this what you think based on your Mum's symptoms? How is your stomach/abdomen? Did you mention your fears when you saw the doctor for your blood test results? I think you should be very careful as to what you read on the HA board because you are going through a challenging spell and there is so much stuff on here which is really unhelpful when you are trying to keep your head above the HA waters..
ServerError
25-11-17, 21:07
Stomach has settled down a fair bit. Still a bit "backed up", but the discomfort has faded away.
The A&E doctor said that neurological conditions are hard to diagnose and that all he could do was a standard neuro exam. He said he couldn't rule anything out and that something is clearly going on, but realistically it's not within his capabilities to say.
It's not an exact match for my mum's symptoms by any means, but it's a very very strange and scary feeling. My dad thinks anxiety is the issue, but I really don't think that this time. Yes, I am anxious, but these sensations are way too weird and unusual.
Use your tools SE. I know the dragon is breathing fire down your neck but it's not something until they say it's something. You know that....
Positive thoughts
So it will be up to your GP as to whether he/she wants to refer you or not to a neurologist. The A&E doctor was non-committal and all he did was pass the buck back to your GP. Are you confident in your GP's judgement? I take it you wouldn't be happy for these symptoms to be attributed to anxiety?
ServerError
25-11-17, 21:25
The problem is I don't recognise these symptoms from past episodes of anxiety.
I won't be seeing my GP as he's away at the minute. But the A&E doctor has written a letter recommending I get referred to a neurologist.
Hi SE. I know how scary this must be. Over the past year, I've had a whole raft of symptoms that ultimately appear to be attributable to anxiety. And many of these have been like nerulogoical symptoms. Pins and needles in all four limbs, dizziness, tight / stiff leg muscles, and lastly bladder issues are all potential mimickers of MS. I'd never had any of these until late July, but since then have had all of them at some point (most of them have now settled down, but one or two remain to some extent).
I was sufficiently freaked out that I saw a neurologist privately. It wouldn't be fair to name him, bu the was someone on the MS society's list of top MS neuros, so he appears to know his stuff. He did the exam, and was very confident that it wasn't MS. He explained to me that it would actually be very unusual (not unheard of, but unusual) to have a normal neurological exam and still have MS. Effectively, the disturbances caused by MS would generally "show up" in an abnormal exam before they presented as symptoms, meaning that if you have symptoms but a clear exam, the symptoms are usually something else.. He offered an MRI to be sure which I will probably take, but his sound advice helped no end.
Then there's also the thread on this very board explaining how anxiety can create neuro like symptoms, often after many years of struggling with anxiety more generally. You're doing the right thing by getting everything properly checked out, but from what you've told us so far, the most likely outcome by far is that your Dad is proven right.
Hope you can keep your chin up. I know first hand that where you are is not much fun, so hopefully you can come through this without too much stress
I'm sorry to read all this, Server. You're certainly a logical and intelligent person, and I believe you when you say these symptoms feel different or new. However, so many conditions like CFS, fibromyalgia, not to mention DP/DR, PD, anxiety and depression, can cause MS-type symptoms.
Use the forum for support and motivation because I think you need it right now. You have done the right thing in seeking medical attention and a referral to see a neurologist. You deserve to find out the cause of this and I wish you all the best.
The problem is I don't recognise these symptoms from past episodes of anxiety.
My anxiety presented the same exact way for 15 years, then randomly it seemed, within the past couple of years I developed new anxiety symptoms. Including some that are very similar to what you described, such as tingling and numbness in my extremities that seemed to spread. I believe I’ve also experienced the phantom “it feels like something is touching me when nothing is actually touching me” symptom that you experienced. It could definitely still be a product of your anxiety.
I have CFS which has some similarities with MS. I can't speak for MS, but if you had CFS, you would have a lot more extreme symptoms. CFS is a debilitating condition with symptoms that stop people from 'normal functioning'. It doesn't start with small symptoms like odd sensations - it's clearly a big illness from the start, though it takes a long time to rule out other causes/conditions.
If I just had numbness in fingers and toes like you do, I'd be so grateful. I am very much disabled; my symptoms are much more extreme and fit the totality of the CFS description.
Considering that you have a history of anxiety, it is most likely an anxiety symptom. Anxiety can continue to manifest itself in new ways. It's very bothersome. But please do find some gratitude in not having all the other symptoms that go with MS.
ServerError
26-11-17, 05:17
I'm really struggling now. I'm convinced this is MS or something serious. It seems so implausible that this could be anxiety. I can't believe this is actually happening to me...
You know it can be anxiety server because you see it here in thread after thread every single day. You’ll remain this way until you see the neurologist. I know you said that in the past you haven’t been overly concerned about having tests etc but that’s where you are at now. There is no rhyme or reason to HA and the worst thing you can do is assume “it can’t be anxiety”. How can such such a logical person get fooled by something as illogical as HA? Easy. You will feel better after you see the neuro. In the meantime try to remember that the treatment for MS these days is truly amazing. I work with a teacher whose wife has MS and she has reached the point where she only needs to receive treatment every 5 years. I am pretty certain that the neuro will give you an all clear but in the meantime it may help to view MS differently.
ServerError
26-11-17, 06:44
Thanks swajj, and everyone else trying to help me.
I agree I'm s rational person, but that's what's leading me down this road. It's too illogical that this could be anxiety. Even the constipation adds up. It's a strong indicator of MS affecting the spinal cord. It's too much of a coincidence. I now have a tremor in my upper left leg and burning sensations on my shin.
I feel utterly doomed and I'm actually crying.
But this is exactly what an HA spiral does to you. It makes you believe that the only possibility is the worst possible outcome. The reality is that anxiety IS the most likely culprit. Anxiety can do a lot of things to every system of one’s body. You’re extremely anxious and stressed right now. So of course you’re feeling it. Of course your digestive system is out of wack. Of course you’re having tremors and burning skin sensations. You know that anxiety can cause those sensations.
Think of what advice you’d be giving anyone else on this forum if they were typing this thread. You’re stuck in an anxiety spiral right now. It’s not logical to string together a few unrelated symptoms and self diagnose a serious illness. That’s health anxiety logic.
Hi Server, funny you mention these symptoms, I've had them but not in my extremities but in my arm or leg, I felt as if someone was touching me or a hair was on my skin but when I went to check nothing was there. I forgot about them till I read this and I know you're a logical person.
Could be anything though really - pinched nerves in your back/neck.
I got this weird lump grow on the sole of my foot and my big toe would go numb and feel like I had a sock on - was supe weird but I actually never worried about it - as it always went away. I think, as you know, anxiety can do some weird things. I was CERTAIN That my twitching eye was due to something neurological and the neurologist has said 'its' definitely not and linked to anxiety' and I went to him twice ;)
I have to trust him, I assume that you wouldn't pass a neuro exam if something was going on - and I think, (in my uneducated opinion of someone who has anxiety) - that it's likely to be anxiety .. back issues etc ... Keep us updated... x
Remember the beast will take any opportunity to rise up - don't let him - deep breathes.... xo
I won't tell you my symptoms but suffice is to say that I was sent to spend a day at the Atkinson Morley neurological hospital for extensive tests including a lumbar puncture. My symptoms were new and weird and unexplained. Nothing was found, I didn't have MS or any other neurological deficit. We all know what the culprit was.
Of course my story won't be of any consolation to you as you are terrified but remember your own advice in that it is the mind's response to perceived symptoms which can be so significant. If you have any benzos in stock it may be time to take one?
Thanks swajj, and everyone else trying to help me.
I agree I'm s rational person, but that's what's leading me down this road. It's too illogical that this could be anxiety. Even the constipation adds up. It's a strong indicator of MS affecting the spinal cord. It's too much of a coincidence. I now have a tremor in my upper left leg and burning sensations on my shin.
I feel utterly doomed and I'm actually crying.
I know how it is. All the dots connect...seemingly. I’ve been there. And that voice inside your head that says “there is no way this can be anxiety” was inside my head every time. How is it possible that you can have all the symptoms of a serious condition unless you actually have the condition? I have no idea. It just is. You have to recognise that all of those symptoms presenting themselves over a period of days or weeks proves nothing because that is not how MS develops.
---------- Post added at 18:09 ---------- Previous post was at 18:07 ----------
I won't tell you my symptoms but suffice is to say that I was sent to spend a day at the Atkinson Morley neurological hospital for extensive tests including a lumbar puncture. My symptoms were new and weird and unexplained. Nothing was found, I didn't have MS or any other neurological deficit. We all know what the culprit was.
Of course my story won't be of any consolation to you as you are terrified but remember your own advice in that it is the mind's response to perceived symptoms which can be so significant. If you have any benzos in stock it may be time to take one?
Yes and take them until you see the neurologist.
MyNameIsTerry
26-11-17, 11:03
It started a couple of weeks ago with a strange sensation in one of my toes. Kind of like a numbness, but also as if something was touching it when it wasn't. That seems to have spread to other toes and now I'm feeling it in my hands.
Was seen in A&E today and passed a neuro exam but I've got to go to my GP and get an appointment with a neurologist. Suffice to say I'm fretting.
SE,
You are spiralling. I hate to say it and to see it because you have worked your way out of this before (so you will do it again) but it's obvious.
1. Symptoms from weeks ago that only now are reducing you to tears. Where were these worries a few days ago on your other thread? That's classic anxiety tunnel vision and you see this constantly in this board as well as help others to see what they are saying
2. You've leaped to the scary. Where have you got MS from? Have you ruled everything else out? Have you looked at how nerves experience these things quite normally? If you put pressure on a nerve you can replicate this symptom.
3. Timing. Just like the IBS symptoms isn't this convenient timing? Why at the exact same time as your other symptoms? See 4.
4. Why doesn't this feature as some underlying condition that caused what your GP is actually testing for? Maybe it does (which I doubt) which steers you away from MS if your symptoms aren't even MS ones?
5. Your dad says he disagrees You hinted at your mum's symptoms so am I to take it that she has MS? So, your dad is objective and also knowledgeable on MS and he disagrees with you?
6. Panic. What are you going to A&E for? They can't do anymore than your GP. I'm not judging you, I'm just pointing out a fact. Panic makes us all do things.
7. Pattern. Does this sound familiar to your old pattern? I bet it does to ones you've seen on this board.
8. New symptom. Have you checked this symptom can't be attributed to anxiety or some minor issue that anxiety can latch onto or appear to make more intense? In my 10 years I've seen new symptoms just like probably most of us if not all.
I could keep going with all this. I thought paraesthesia when you mentioned it and in that long list of possible reasons sits panic attacks, anxiety, dehydration, etc. That's three real possibilities.
I agree with everyone else commenting.
And I doubt you will get to a neurologist unless your GP wants to rule out. Given that could take weeks, benzos would need spreading out but there's no shame in taking one here & there, just be sensible with them.
So, what now? Do you go back to your therapy tools and try to get relaxation periods into your day?
Didn't you recently come off your Sertraline? Again, another possibility for this being anxiety and that you are having a wobble. I suspect your GP will be thinking about this and whether you got far enough before you came off because antidepressants can be hiding things underneath...which was my experience.
About 4-5 years ago I had an MS scare. My health anxiety soared and I spiraled. I had just about every symptom out of the blue. Severe headaches, tingling in my extremeties (mostly left sided), dizziness, tired, and an episode of trigeminal neuralgia about 6 months prior. I was convinced. Over the course of a few months of course I saw my dr and neurologist and had an MRI, nerve conduction tests, etc. It didn't appear that anxiety sparked this. After it all, I did not have MS.
It's still a mystery and I still suffer from these symptoms lingering years later. My neurologist diagnosed me with post-viral syndrome. He said I must have gotten a virus that ended up affecting my nervous system. (This is quite well known especially with epstein-barr virus) Post-viral syndrome is similar to chronic fatigue syndrome (I think it is called ME in Europe).
Hope you feel better. Hang in there. I agree that great strides have been made in MS treatment also.
ServerError
26-11-17, 13:42
Yeah, I went back on sertraline on Friday. Didn't take it yesterday due to being out of the house chasing medical help all day, but I've taken it again today. It makes sense and I certainly don't see any shame in needing it.
An out-of-hours doctor has given me some diazepam as well, so I've been using that and it does take the edge off. Trying to be sensible with it.
I went to A&E because my dad rang NHS 111 concerned about my mental health and they felt I needed to go. Once I got there, all I could or would talk about was MS, and of course an emergency department can do nothing for that really, so I just left with a letter advising my GP to send me to a neurologist.
The GP will make his/her own mind up on this. The A&E doctor is just covering his back.
You don't want to get back into the repeated trips to A&E, convinced you have MS. Take the diazepam and try and get your anxiety down to the level where you can think straight. Are you able to go to work tomorrow or will it be impossible to concentrate?
MyNameIsTerry
26-11-17, 14:01
Yep, that's 111 for you. They just send out ambulances to cover themselves or you to A&E. We had a GP out for my mum who was quite negative about them. It's worrying, it makes you wonder what's the point sometimes.
Have you found your anxiety has ramped up since the Sert restarted? There's definately no shame in taking it. To be honest, it might be better to take action now if you came off too soon. I didn't do enough and thought I was better and 6 months after withdrawal I was a real mess with a relapse. Getting in early might just halt it's gallop and avoid something like that? Just a thought but equally you may have never gone that route without.
Sert takes just under 7 days to reach steady-state. With missing a dose, that is going to extend so I would go 7 days from the first day on continual use really. I've found with these meds that some struggle during the start up, some struggle after it reaches that peak and others just struggle all the way through. So, right now, and for perhaps a few weeks to come, if you start seeing things (new symptoms) they can be a result of the Sert and providing your GP is fine with everything then it may be a matter of biting down hard and taking the beating until the Sert kicks in and gives you a hand.
There's no shame in meds, no shame in wobbles and no shame is struggling. A&E or otherwise. You've got a good understanding of it all and a very reasonable approach to mental health treatment. Use what's there and get yourself back into recovery. On the dark days, remember your progress on here. See how that person talks in a different way. It may help or not but it's hope and you can & will do it again!
ServerError
26-11-17, 14:09
I'm currently out of work (again) thanks to anxiety. I was very nervous in my most recent job and the manager told me it was being talked about and that he was struggling to have confidence in me and it might be best if we parted ways. I found it humiliating and hurtful as I wasn't failing in my role. It was just an issue the team had with my obvious nerves.
I'm only on 50mg of sertraline, so I'd be surprised if I feel anything. It wasn't until I went onto 100mg that anything happened last time. I found it really hard on start up, but I did get through it.
One of the things I've learned over the past few days is how little immediate help there is if you're in a mental health crisis.
I'm really sorry about your job, Server, and I feel very bad for bringing work up. I know how devastating this must have been for you and how hard you have tried to integrate into the company.
I also know how impossible it is to get appropriate and immediate help in a mental health crisis.
I am so so sorry to hear that you are back in this cycle.
I think that Terry has made some really valid points above.
Coming off and then going back onto meds will definitely have an effect on you, and I would bet that this has a lot to do with you anxiety.
I never had panic attacks until I was in the start up phase of SSRI's but in my case it was a small price to pay.
Hang in there, you have done brilliantly getting out of this before and once this anxiety dies down a little you will again.
Keep on posting if it helps.
Elen
It's so unfair, isn't it. You are an extremely hard working and conscientious person yet you have to part ways because of something beyond your total control. It's not as if you just don't care because you have obviously put such a lot of work into your recovery...You must be very angry and frustrated but I know you will carry on with your usual strength and determination. You do need to look after yourself now though.
ServerError
26-11-17, 14:32
I'm not angry about it. It was a temporary position until Christmas. It's not even close to what I want to do with my life. I was so nervous because it was a kind of job that falls out of my comfort zone. I worked really hard not to listen to the anxiety and I got through the initial week or two of crushing nerves, but it wasn't enough. Some places believe in diversity - including diversity of personalities. Some don't. This place didn't know how to respond to me. The manager does not see how somebody so nervous could still do a good job. I think I'm better off out of there, but not harbouring any ill will towards them. It's the kind of thing you just have to let go of.
MyNameIsTerry
26-11-17, 14:53
Some managers just want an easy life, SE, if giving you a little nudge in a certain direction helps resolve "a problem" for them, to hell with the person. I've worked in environments like that alongside other managers and found it frustrating. With it being a temporary position, the same consideration won't be given to temps as to FT's but be aware of your contractual rights and rights to any Capability process. It's not quite so easy to dismiss people on ill health grounds so beware any little snidey hints about going as it may be more for them than you.
You haven't missed your Xmas target by much, perhaps that's worth remembering?
Like Elen, starting meds opened a whole new anxiety world for me, especially the 2nd time around on the SNRI. You hopefully will be lucky and not experence much. And I agree about immediate help, other than being ill enough to be sectioned we are on our own a lot. Our GP's must feel the same too as all they have is a Crisis Team which try to keep you going until real help gets going.
On the bright side, you accessed therapy pretty quickly last time. Are you still in therapy now? If so, that's going to be an important lifeline for you.
ServerError
26-11-17, 14:59
I'm on a waiting list for another round of CBT related to social anxiety. I guess I may need to change the focus.
As I say, I've only taken two doses of sertraline so far, so I don't think start up is a factor yet. I genuinely do feel as if something is wrong in my extremities. Please god let it just be anxiety.
Just to let you know ServerError that I have experienced those feelings of something touching my skin when nothing there. I've had burning sensations down my legs, a thumb that moved by itself, and dead feeling in my toes and they were all anxiety related and nearly 4 years ago. I wanted you to know that, so that you could rationalise the brain thinking the worst.
I lived in fear of getting Parkinson's Disease like my Father and even mimic some his symptoms, still do sometimes. I live in fear of almost everything that exists, but try to rationalise the brain. Let's face it, it would be weird to contract everything I think I've got or going to get.
If you suffer with depression as well and sometimes this is not recognised even to the person themselves, anxiety can then excel in it's entirety.
We can take the tests, we can see the GP/Doc, but it is up to us to rationalise what is real and not real. Easier said than done, I know, but sometimes we just spend too much time thinking the worst. I am a culprit of that too. But when you have sadness and disappointment in your life, it does come out in the form of anxiety.
I should eat my own words, but somehow it is so much easier to help someone else rather than yourself. I know that you have given good advice on many occasions to many members.
Maybe like me, you need to take time out to just be kind to yourself. x
I'm not angry about it. It was a temporary position until Christmas. It's not even close to what I want to do with my life. I was so nervous because it was a kind of job that falls out of my comfort zone. I worked really hard not to listen to the anxiety and I got through the initial week or two of crushing nerves, but it wasn't enough. Some places believe in diversity - including diversity of personalities. Some don't. This place didn't know how to respond to me. The manager does not see how somebody so nervous could still do a good job. I think I'm better off out of there, but not harbouring any ill will towards them. It's the kind of thing you just have to let go of.
Well I think you were incredibly brave just to take that job on. All credit to you for that. You have never been one to shirk a challenge.
ServerError
27-11-17, 07:46
Doctors appointment in two hours. Still having very strange feelings in my hands and feet. Just got to hope its anxiety.
I'm seeing a trainee as my doctor is away. He's still a trained professional so it doesn't bother me too much, but I'm sure he'll arrange a neurologist appointment for me. It'd be somewhat reassuring if he didn't.
---------- Post added at 07:46 ---------- Previous post was at 06:58 ----------
It feels like it's spread to my tongue now. It's tingling and numb at the tip all of a sudden. I don't even know what to think at this point...
Annaboodle
27-11-17, 07:50
Hi Server, just to say hope it goes ok this morning.
Hi, i'm sorry you're going through this. You've answered some of my posts in the past with very good, rational advice which helped me a great deal.
My dad had ms, he had it for around 40 years. For him it started with his sight going temporarily and progressed slowly over the years. He did have some numbness in the latter years but mainly in his hands. You're symptoms seem to be coming on really quickly which hopefully means that its the anxiety causing them.
My sister was also diagnosed with ms 13 years ago, she lives a completely normal life.
I had numbness all down my left hand side from under my ribs right down to my feet, I had feelings of hot and cold in this area too. This happened while I was goung through a bad HA episode, it stayed with me for about 2 months until my anxiety started to decrease.
I don't know if my post will help but I hope it does.
Take care
Tracey.
You will get a very thorough assessment from a young and enthusiastic trainee doctor. He will have to liaise with the GP who is training him before making any referral.
Rainbow's post just sums up the vast array of neuro symptoms which HA can throw up and maintain. Tongue tingling is very common. You won't be able to consider anxiety at the moment but I hope you get some help this morning and some guidance as to how to get through the next few days.
ServerError
27-11-17, 10:46
I've gotten a referral to a neurologist. The doctor I saw does not suspect MS, but he just wants an expert in neurological issues to confirm his thoughts. It seems like we're a lomg way from considering MS as the issue here.
I think maybe we're seeing the impact of my mum's diagnosis finally coming out almost 20 years after the event.
I've gotten a referral to a neurologist. The doctor I saw does not suspect MS, but he just wants an expert in neurological issues to confirm his thoughts. It seems like we're a lomg way from considering MS as the issue here.
I think maybe we're seeing the impact of my mum's diagnosis finally coming out almost 20 years after the event.
I agree, Server. Also, you would have neurological deficits which seem to be absent in your case. This must be terrifying but please also watch for signs of depression, which might try rearing its head, because the stress and upset will take its toll. I'm glad you've restarted Sert and perhaps speak to GP when he returns about increasing to what you say was optimum dose at 100mg.
Did you get an idea of how long referral will take?
ServerError
27-11-17, 11:38
I asked the doctor how long the referral would take but he said he had no idea. They'll be in touch. I don't think it'll be a long wait, though.
I'm seeing my GP in three weeks to discuss how I'm getting on with the sertraline. That stuff was a like a miracle cure to me last time. I'm not assuming it will do the same this time, but it's worth a go.
Did you get a routine or an urgent referral? I hope you don't have to wait too long purely for your own peace of mind.
I agree with KK in what he says about depression but I know that you have always been very sensible and insightful as to how you manage your mental health. I think diazepam also has a role to play here particularly during acute and sustained periods of stress.
ServerError
27-11-17, 13:15
I don't know if it was routine or urgent. I suspect it was urgent, but I'm not placing too much significance on that.
My dad got an urgent referral for a hemifacial spasm recently and the neurologist took one look and said it was nothing. Sometimes urgent referrals, rightly or wrong, are just GPs trying to speed things up.
he just wants an expert in neurological issues to confirm his thoughts. It seems like we're a lomg way from considering MS as the issue here.
That's a big positive that he apparently doesn't believe it's anything serious. Did he share his thoughts?
Positive thoughts
ServerError
27-11-17, 13:22
That's a big positive that he apparently doesn't believe it's anything serious. Did he share his thoughts?
Positive thoughts
Not massively. His thoughts are that it isn't MS, which is good news. He thinks maybe there's a musculoskeletal issue with my toe and the rest of it is coming from anxiety. I hope the neurologist agrees because I don't want to have to go for MRIs and all that.
My mental health strikes me as more of a concern to him.
---------- Post added at 13:22 ---------- Previous post was at 13:20 ----------
One thing I didn't say is that the initial symptom started after a bought a new pair of running shoes and then started running again after months off. I initially put it down to that and didn't worry too much, but it was when I began to feel as if it was spreading that I began to panic.
MyNameIsTerry
27-11-17, 14:48
It started after new running shoes and starting running again so the odds on something of nerve issue seem likely from injury if you haven't trained in a while.
Sounds like ruling out to me.
Not massively. His thoughts are that it isn't MS, which is good news. He thinks maybe there's a musculoskeletal issue with my toe and the rest of it is coming from anxiety. I hope the neurologist agrees because I don't want to have to go for MRIs and all that.
My mental health strikes me as more of a concern to him.
---------- Post added at 13:22 ---------- Previous post was at 13:20 ----------
One thing I didn't say is that the initial symptom started after a bought a new pair of running shoes and then started running again after months off. I initially put it down to that and didn't worry too much, but it was when I began to feel as if it was spreading that I began to panic.
And since you started to panic the physical symptoms became worse. Classic anxiety, if you ask me.
One thing I didn't say is that the initial symptom started after a bought a new pair of running shoes and then started running again after months off. I initially put it down to that and didn't worry too much, but it was when I began to feel as if it was spreading that I began to panic.
You kept that part quiet, Server!
I definitely think this is pertinent to your initial symptoms in feet, and once you started panicking, the rapid progression to upper body area. You know better than anyone here that we become blinkered when fear takes hold of us and that is what has happened here in my view.
Also, because of what happened to your mum, MS will lurk as a dark shadow until it is faced and dealt with. There must be acceptance that, yes, it could happen to any of us at some point, but that we simply cannot live our lives in fear of an illness we cannot control "catching up with us".
Hope the med, plus your insight, will help get you through this difficult time. You will prevail :shades:
I don't know if it was routine or urgent. I suspect it was urgent, but I'm not placing too much significance on that.
My dad got an urgent referral for a hemifacial spasm recently and the neurologist took one look and said it was nothing. Sometimes urgent referrals, rightly or wrong, are just GPs trying to speed things up.
Hey Server!
I'm glad you feel better or hope you feel better, truly the weird thing anxiety can do to our bodies is amazing, we are HYPER sensitive, like me with my shaking mouth, probably normal but how many people would notice - NONE!
Only an HA'r.
I have numbness in my fingers on and off actually and my Dr wasn't concerned.
I"m curious about your DAD and HFS - was his eye and cheek twitching and they said NO it's not that - that's whats happening with me and they have said NO it's not that!
Interesting that they just know things isn't it, when we are so SET on it being something.
---------- Post added at 21:05 ---------- Previous post was at 21:04 ----------
Plus sorry this wont help but out of all the neurological issues isn't MS, as hard to bear as it is - isn't it one of the ones they can manage pretty well?
x This may not help but that's my understanding, I don't really fair MS it's the other ones I don't want.
(Tan, my cheek started twitching today during my workout. Still going :/)
ServerError
27-11-17, 22:54
To be honest, pulisa, there's a whole heap of posts in this thread that I have found helpful. Very helpful. I wouldn't want anyone to think I wasn't grateful or that I was being ignorant because I haven't replied directly to them.
So I've been taking senna for my immobile bowels - YIKES! Let's just say it's been an intense experience...
(Tan, my cheek started twitching today during my workout. Still going :/)
:) Thanks Melfish!
My twitches are still going .. I've given up on them... it's crazy.
ServerError
28-11-17, 00:20
tan235 -
I don't know much about my dad's HFS. He went to the doctor with it and got s referral to a neurologist (the same neurologist who's been managing my mum's MS for 20 years - very experienced guy) and he looked at it and said "it's going to annoy you but it's nothing to worry about." My dad had a breakdown similar to my own in his early 30s, but he's a very laidback man these days. He admits he gets a little tension, but he feels none of the panic we do.
MyNameIsTerry
28-11-17, 01:56
How about something less harsh and natural for GI health? Like something probiotic e.g. yoghurt? Given it sorts people out struggling with the runs or constipation from antibiotics, it can help.
ServerError
28-11-17, 07:45
I was feeling quite a lot better yesterday, but now things have changed again. I had a sudden discomfort in my eyes, as if they suddenly became dry and gritty. They still feel wrong, and now my mind has become flat and blunted. I can't feel emotions and I feel disconnected and strange. It's just one thing after another right now...
MyNameIsTerry
28-11-17, 08:09
Could even be the Sert. You may have not had side effects last time, so would hope it would be a good indication of the next time, but it's not set in stone.
The blunting DP/DR stuff is common with these meds but it's also commonly caused by higher periods of anxiety & panic.
If you are relapsing, they can hit harder than periods before. Add meds on top of that and you may get a cumulative effect.
Just take it hour by hour, day by day. Getting your anxiety levels down a bit so you feel more in control of the cycles may take some time but you will get there.
I always dismiss any symptom that doesn't reveal a pattern. Even a pattern might just be a stage in anxiety, I've had many that stayed for a while and then never came back. It's going to be hard for you to do this right now so it might just be a matter of holding on until the Sert starts helping or anything else you are doing, but try to be wary of being sucked in by things that come & go, your body is on high alert right now and your subconscious is looking for potential risks to flag.
If you had a better day then that's a good sign. Tomorrow could be a better day too.
You sound better server. I’m glad you are planning to keep up the CBT. With HA it is very much a case of 2 steps forward and 1 step back. It’s still progress though and eventually the setbacks will be further apart, less intense and shorter in duration. You are winning though. 🙂
ServerError
28-11-17, 08:25
I thought I was improving too. Yesterday was a much better day. But this eye symptom flared up out of the blue and it's knocked me right back. It's as if there's no moisture there. They feel dry and gritty and sore.
I'd take the diazepam whilst you are in this higher anxiety phase along with the sertraline. It will dampen down your anxiety response and help you function. Your brain will just be searching for new symptoms which you would normally not notice or just dismiss. You are focussing on your eyes because you know the connection.
ServerError
28-11-17, 08:28
There is genuinely something going on in my eyes, though. I'm not imagining it.
No, you won't be. I'm sure the sensation is very real.
---------- Post added at 08:34 ---------- Previous post was at 08:31 ----------
What about the other symptoms? Can you focus on more than one set of symptoms and keep them all going? What about your oesophagus and your abdomen?
Eyes have muscles. Anxiety makes muscles tense. Tense muscles cause pain/ blurred vision/scratchy eyes and other sensations.
ServerError
28-11-17, 08:48
Thanks everyone. I've received too much help to acknowledge every single post, but I'm really grateful to you all.
If you have "lost" some of your initial symptoms then this is a good sign of anxiety-driven sensations and hypersensitivity. I could normally only focus on one set of symptoms at a time.
Do you associate those types of eye problems with MS?
My eyes were always my main concern when I had anxiety. I would go through periods where I was convinced that there was something wrong with my eyes. Then I would have long periods when I didn’t even think about them. I never worried about my eyes when I was focused on one cancer or another. Of course there was the time when I was sure I had eye cancer...
I’ve had many appointments with eye specialists (not optometrists) and there has never been anything wrong. I even see an eye specialist ever 12 months just to give me peace of mind. My point is that everything you describe with your eyes I have had, as well as many things you haven’t mentioned. Was it my imagination? No, but it was somehow connected to my anxiety. That’s all I know.
---------- Post added at 18:33 ---------- Previous post was at 18:26 ----------
It’s hard to believe that anxiety can cause any of the things it does. You tell yourself that it is very likely anxiety causing this thing or that thing. But then the sensation or pain or numbness or twitching or headache or.....is so constant and/intense that you start telling yourself “there is no way this is just anxiety”. That’s how it was for me anyway.
---------- Post added at 18:38 ---------- Previous post was at 18:33 ----------
If you have "lost" some of your initial symptoms then this is a good sign of anxiety-driven sensations and hypersensitivity. I could normally only focus on one set of symptoms at a time.
You make a very good point pulisa. That isn’t to say that the symptoms dont keep turning up but the next one usually doesn’t turn up until the one before it has stopped.
There is genuinely something going on in my eyes, though. I'm not imagining it.
You might find that your mouth is a bit dryer as well. This screams anxiety to me, as the lacrimal glands that secrete moisture and tears in the eyes, and the salivary glands are all closely controlled by the parasympathetic nervous system.
When this part of your nervous system, which contributes to relaxing you, is tuned out, the sympathetic nervous system takes over. This will result in dry eyes and mouth, because you’ve effectively switched your lacrimal and salivary glands off.
It might seem like the obvious answer to just point at anxiety all the time, but remember that the simplest explanation is usually the correct one. What’s more likely here? That you’ve got some weird neurological condition that’s producing all of these symptoms at the same time, all without detectable neurological deficits, or that your nervous system is in turmoil due to heightened stress and anxiety levels?
ServerError
28-11-17, 11:47
Yeah, you're right Gary. I've been having a dry mouth for the last week or so. The word "diabetes" flickered for a moment, but I realised I wasn't thirsty, just dry in the mouth. Classic anxiety.
I had to see the doctor again today anyway for an ECG because he wants to give me some beta blockers and make sure it's safe to do so (my heart is fine). I told him about my eyes and he inspected them and gave me some drops.
He's also given me a different antidepressant to try, in this case duloxetine. I'm anxious about sertraline start-up symptoms and was already experiencing some flatness and he felt duloxetine is good for anxiety and might be worth a try. I know it's hit and miss but I'll give it a go.
Hi ServerError
i just wanted to send you a hug x
:hugs:
He's also given me a different antidepressant to try, in this case duloxetine. I'm anxious about sertraline start-up symptoms and was already experiencing some flatness and he felt duloxetine is good for anxiety and might be worth a try. I know it's hit and miss but I'll give it a go.
I thought you'd give Sert more time to start working before swapping to another AD, especially since you said how much it had helped you last time. Have you been advised to start Duloxetine right away, as Sert will still be in your system? Might be wise to wait a few days before starting...
ServerError
28-11-17, 14:54
Good question, KK.
Essentially, my doctor is away at the moment, which means my treatment is somewhat disrupted by seeing different doctors each time. Today, I complained to the doctor I saw that I was feeling "flat" or emotionally blunted, and that I remember the feeling from starting up on sertraline last time.
Neither of us can say if the sertraline is the definite cause, and I've only just started, so it doesn't seem certain. But he offered to give me another one to try that he believes is especially good for anxiety. I don't think I have too much to fear from switching at this early stage, but I essentially have two sets of antidepressants here now and a decision to make over which to go with.
I've been in such a terrible state that I'm not sure I can handle another start up like the last one.
So if you are feeling "flat" does this mean that your anxiety levels have come down?
ServerError
28-11-17, 17:53
So if you are feeling "flat" does this mean that your anxiety levels have come down?
No, the flat feeling only increases anxiety. It's a hard feeling to explain, but it involves feeling physically blocked in your head from your normal range of emotions. It's horrible, although harmless.
SE, are you taking benzos too? They can dull affect
Dave_Lister
28-11-17, 19:49
The problem is I don't recognise these symptoms from past episodes of anxiety.
I won't be seeing my GP as he's away at the minute. But the A&E doctor has written a letter recommending I get referred to a neurologist.
Just because they aren't like your old anxiety symptoms doesn't mean that you cannot develop new ones. As we get older our bodies change, and that can create new symptoms of anxiety.
Have you made your mind up about sticking with sertraline or changing to duloxetine? I'm ultra cautious with these things-especially in an acute anxiety state-so have to say I was surprised that your doctor wanted you to start a new AD after such a short period on a low dose of sertraline.
Just a note... SSRIs are fickle. My daughter was on Sertraline (Zoloft). It stopped working. She went through three meds and all the cross tapering and such but they finally found one that's working well for her (I think it's Lexapro).
Positive thoughts
Elliejane44
28-11-17, 21:23
Sorry to hear you going through this bad time again with anxiety
You have been such a help to me. I often re read your email with advice .
Wishing you all best for a speedy recovery from this. You can do it
Ellie
Have you made your mind up about sticking with sertraline or changing to duloxetine? I'm ultra cautious with these things-especially in an acute anxiety state-so have to say I was surprised that your doctor wanted you to start a new AD after such a short period on a low dose of sertraline.
I agree. Think it's wise to stick with what has worked in the past, and 'better the devil you know', rather than a med that could potentially send your anxiety sky-rocketing and mood plummeting. SNRI ADs are known to be more potent in terms of side effects but it's ultimately a choice for you to make and find out.
Just being mindful of your already fragile state of mind right now.
MyNameIsTerry
29-11-17, 02:52
Good question, KK.
Essentially, my doctor is away at the moment, which means my treatment is somewhat disrupted by seeing different doctors each time. Today, I complained to the doctor I saw that I was feeling "flat" or emotionally blunted, and that I remember the feeling from starting up on sertraline last time.
Neither of us can say if the sertraline is the definite cause, and I've only just started, so it doesn't seem certain. But he offered to give me another one to try that he believes is especially good for anxiety. I don't think I have too much to fear from switching at this early stage, but I essentially have two sets of antidepressants here now and a decision to make over which to go with.
I've been in such a terrible state that I'm not sure I can handle another start up like the last one.
That's a decision by your GP based on pretty much nothing in my opinion.
Sert helped you last = obvious to retry it and inline with NHS advice about going back on what helped before trying something completely new.
You mentioned same side effects as last time = keep patient going on same med until past side effect window.
Unless you mentioned you couldn't take thr side effects, why waste time switching to an unknown? This seems more about an individual GP's opinion about success with a med to me.
You can switch immediately, that's safe, it will be a cross taper or stop-start since it's only Fluoxetine that needs a wash out period between when withdraing from it sue it's long half life. Sert & Dul have very similiar half lives. . Your GP is supposed to manage this process so for him not to even bother to tell you what to do is not a good sign of his competence. And to be honest, why switch someone who's been taking Sert for a few days? The only reason would be if the side effects wree just too harsh because it will be potentially over a month before any success from the med can be judged.
http://www.gpnotebook.co.uk/simplepage.cfm?ID=1651179592
I hope he has started you on 30mg. Even the PIL will tell you for anxiety it is 30mg first then 60mg in a taper up. Until you hit 60mg this med is simply acting as a SSRI. This can mean different side effects once moving up to 60mg.
I found 30mg was ok for side effects. Nausea was quick on the first 2 days and then went. Gong to 60mg was a very different experience but many have little or no side effects so my experience is irrelevant to you and I wouldn't discourage anyone from any med anyway.
My view is this GP has switched you for no valid reason. You know Sert can help. You don't know about Dul. It's obvous Sert should be tried again first and a few days is of no benefit in assessing the med anyway.
SE, are you keeping a journal?
I ask this, because when I was in the throes of anxiety, I didn't know up or down, and I couldn't accurately gauge myself. I couldn't very well tell my triggers, I didn't know if a sensation was my body or because of my medication, etc. When I was keeping a journal, and writing down something every day, I could look back at it and pinpoint my triggers. I could also see that the medication was working, as I would talk about certain aspects of my PTSD triggers differently and/or in less volume. Lastly, I could show it to my therapist, and even if I couldn't see patterns in my journal, he could--which of course helped tremendously.
ServerError
30-11-17, 09:48
Still having a terrible time. My bowels are still locked up. My guts just feel like a rock hard lump. No appetite. I am eating, but it's hard work. My esophagus just feels all wrong. It's hard to explain.
I feel really flat, as if all my emotions have been have removed from my head. I just don't know what to think. I want to believe anxiety can cause all this, but it's so hard.
I want to believe anxiety can cause all this, but it's so hard.
Take a read of your posts prior to your recovery. You're saying many of the same things ;) IMO, this blip too shall pass. You did it once, you can do it again.
Positive thoughts
ServerError
30-11-17, 16:07
I'm determined to bounce back from this. I'm going ahead with the duloxetine and my dad is looking to get me some help. I've just been given a bit more diazepam, but I'm teaching the limit of how much of that I can have.
Just hoping the tests I have coming up are all clear.
---------- Post added at 16:07 ---------- Previous post was at 13:00 ----------
Today my esophagus is hurting and swallowing feels wrong. It doesn't feel like acid reflux used to feel. I still have no appetite. I just want to eat like normal again. Nobody is offering to send me for an endoscopy. I wonder about going back to the doctor yet again to push for one.
Server.... You're in a deep hole right now and your anxiety is wanting you to "act" on these symptoms you're getting. As Fish said, the best action you can take right now is to periodically revisit some of your old posts and remind yourself of coping strategies that have helped before.
I hope you've made right choice swapping to Duloxetine and glad your dad is looking out for you too.
ServerError
30-11-17, 17:30
I just feel like I'll never eat properly again. My esophagus feels like it's completely broken and I can't even remember what hunger or an appetite feels like. Can this really just be anxiety?
Remember what you said about not pushing for tests and allowing your GP to make that decision? You are spiralling badly and we need to challenge you on your irrational thoughts which are caused by sheer panic. Be aware that chopping and changing ADs in an acute anxiety phase is not ideal.
MyNameIsTerry
01-12-17, 02:23
Are you starting on 30mg?
SE, when I was at my worst I thought I would never get the slightest bit better. I've mentioned it plenty of times on here when people say what you just have. I was wrong. It was just my perception at the time based on my negative thinking and how ill I was.
Please try to remember how you felt the first time you went through all this. I know it's scary & demoralising but unfortunately it's a journey you've got to go through again. I remember that feeling. But you do get better.
You learned a lot from your first exsperience, more than I remember I worked out with being so isolated from information & peer groups, so rrad back through what you learned and look to how you can put that to use now.
And remember, we can never judge based on short term.
I just feel like I'll never eat properly again. My esophagus feels like it's completely broken and I can't even remember what hunger or an appetite feels like. Can this really just be anxiety?
You know it can. I lose my appetite when I am worrying about my health. I just can’t eat at all and I have to force myself to eat something. This is especially if I am waiting to have a medical test done. As soon as I get the results my appetite returns.
You are focused on your esophagus and that is why it feels broken. If you focus on one area of your body long enough it will feel “wrong”. Trust me server I have been there. Your esophagus will continue to feel wrong until you can stop focusing on it. For me that would happen when I started focusing on a different area of my body. I always forgot to remember how wrong I was about the previous one. If that makes sense.
I can’t give you advice about meds. I only took the odd diazepam. And I’m no psych but based on my own experience and what you have said here you are manifesting all the symptoms of a neurological disease that you don’t have. See the neurologist server. I reckon that is the only way you will accept that you don’t have a neurological disease. You don’t have to have tests just have a chat.
I just feel like I'll never eat properly again. My esophagus feels like it's completely broken and I can't even remember what hunger or an appetite feels like. Can this really just be anxiety?
Yep. It’s all in your head.
After discovering my friend’s body, I couldn’t eat red meat for 3 months. I would literally lose all appetite. I would get sick to my stomach. I even developed GERD from over production of stomach acid. All psychological. There was nothing physiologically wrong with me.
How are you today, Server? I hope your Dad has been able to help you- it's so important to get support and understanding from those closest to us. We can try and help as best we can on here but ultimately your best source of support is family and true friends.
ServerError
02-12-17, 09:21
I'm okay, thanks for asking. Not quite in as deep a hole I was. Still not feeling nice, though. I've started to notice feelings in my fingers and toes again and it's like they're trying to convince me something is wrong. Just trying not to listen to it and to believe it's anxiety that's causing the problems here.
My insides still aren't working but hopefully they'll come back online at some point.
If it's any help to you my insides aren't working either but that's because I'm in a bit of a mess myself. There is a definite link between lack of gut motility and acute and prolonged anxiety. Senna is harsh but you can buy stuff like movicol or laxido sachets over the counter just to give your guts a bit of help.
It's far from easy when your symptoms are plaguing you. I can never distract myself. Whatever you can do naturally or pharmaceutically to lessen your anxiety is the way to go but I know what a tall order that can be.
Like AntsyVee I recently also developed GERD from anxiety. Makes my throat REALLY sore to the point I can't even sleep. I found chewing sugar free chewing gum really helped though :)
Also when I'm anxious my appitite is the first thing to go. When my anxiety was at it's worst I was 18 and weighed just 5 stone (70 pounds). I was horrifically underweight and almost got hospitalised a few times. All I wanted to do was eat but I spent so much time anxious that I never could. I only managed to get by by stuffing myself silly during periods where my anxiety was low in order to have some reserves when I inevitably went back to extreme anxiety.
ServerError
06-12-17, 17:01
Just had an ultrasound on my abdomen.
Still waiting for a neuro appointment. Could be a while that one.
Just had an ultrasound on my abdomen.
Still waiting for a neuro appointment. Could be a while that one.
What was result of ultrasound?
I would chase up neuro appointment, otherwise you could be waiting forever. We know how rubbish they can be :lac:
ServerError
06-12-17, 18:24
I didn't get the result. Got to wait for them to send the results to my doctor.
I rang my doctors surgery today about the neuro appointment and they said it's in the system and to call them back if it seems to be taking too long (it's only been a week so far).
Have you started the Dulox or are you still on Sertraline, Server? What dose you on?
I'm pretty sure your scan results will come back unremarkable/normal.
ServerError
06-12-17, 19:54
I've been taking 30mg of duloxentine for seven days. I thought I noticed a general mood improvement after about two or three days on it, but that may have been a placebo effect as that is very quick.
I've been calmer the last few days, but I'm probably more worried about my toes than I am about my abdomen right now.
You sound calmer and more composed than you were, but we know there will be more bumps along the road. I think you'll be in a better position to judge whether this med is helping in a couple of weeks. You might want to discuss increasing it too, as I believe you're currently on a low starting dose.
Keep going, matey - you will prevail and get through this testing time.
I know you're going through a very challenging time but I just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday for tomorrow. I hope you continue to feel calmer-it's such a relief after prolonged acute anxiety.
MyNameIsTerry
07-12-17, 01:48
I felt a mood boost when I started on 30mg after a few days but by the end of week 2 it had gone. At that point I took it as the sign to shift up to the minimum therapeutic dose but my GP was monitoring weekly anyway that early on so it was going to come after a week as steady-state is long achieved in this short half life med by then.
But...perhaps give yourself another day before you press on with changes because it's your birthday!!!:birthday::birthday1: I hope you have a good one or if anxiety is there, I hope it's low level so you can have some time to celebrate.
You are doing all the right things. Like kk said keep chasing the neuro appointment. Then you can get back on your road to recovery. Happy birthday server. ��
Any update on this Server? x
ServerError
10-12-17, 13:58
No update really.
I've started eating again. My insides don't feel "right", but the really nasty stuff has stopped. Had an abdominal ultrasound last week so just waiting for results.
Still pretty worried about MS. Probably won't change until I see a neurologist.
I'm having all manner of symptoms: skin prickling, feeling like something is wiggling in my foot, hot feelings on my skin, sore eyes, numb patches (possibly perceived numbness, to be fair), occasional pain in my toes.
Trying to just put it all down to psychosomatic causes really.
ServerError
14-12-17, 19:03
Bit of an update for what it's worth...
I'm in a full-blown relapse, unfortunately and very unwell and quite scared. Strangely, the MS concern has faded somewhat, but I wouldn't be surprised if it comes back at some point.
At the moment, I'm terribly concerned about my digestive system. I have no appetite and eating aggravates me from my esophagus to my lower digestive tract. Psychologically, I'm experiencing severe detatchment and emotional numbness and flatness. I feel nauseous and as if I can't breathe, and as if something is closing in my throat. Not very nice.
I've had blood tests that have ruled quite a lot out. No vitamin deficiency, no thyroid problems, no signs of major organ dysfunction. I had an ultrasound on my abdomen last week and the results are back but they wouldn't give me them over the phone. The doctor wants to see me about it, but I did at least get told to make a "routine" appointment, so I'm just hoping that means nothing serious showed up and he wants to discuss my next set of options. I saw him last week and he did say he strongly believes this is all related to anxiety.
I've completely broken down over all this. I know I can overcome it, but it feels impossible when I don't fully believe anxiety is the problem.
Unfortunately your last sentence sums up what HA feeds off.
It's very hard to just cut the food supply when you are in the midst of it though but you have the knowledge and information to do it gradually when you are feeling mentally stronger and when each test comes back clear.
Thanks for updating us. You will get through this and come out the other side stronger.
ServerError
14-12-17, 19:18
Thanks pulisa. You've always been nice to me and I appreciate it, as I do with others.
My dad is paying for me to see a therapist who is just doing talking therapy with me at the moment. I think I need it more than CBT at the moment, and she is really lovely.
My doctor wasreally annoyed that his colleague put me on duloxetine and created confusion for me. I stopped taking it last week and he said it's time to stop messing about with my brain chemistry and to pick an option and stick with it, and he said to get back in the sertraline. I trust his judgement on that and will give it a try.
You will get through this and come out stronger. Try to look at this as a chance to practise all the things you did last time to get better. I know how hard it is to get started on a plan of recovery after a relapse. It feels like a slap in the face with a cold flannel after doing so well. Baby steps, you can do this.
You're a so well Server! You'll get through this just find. We all have our rough patches <3
I'm really glad that you are back on the sertraline. Can't understand the reasoning behind switching you to duloxetine so quickly but just another example of how some GPs are pretty clueless as regards prescribing these meds..
ServerError
14-12-17, 19:41
The only logic o can come up with is that the doctor who switched me knew of my fears over starting up on sertraline and thought I'd be more likely to take a med I've not tried before. I dunno. But my own doctor is back and was really confused about why that happened. Looks like I'm going forward with the sertraline.
ServerError
15-12-17, 11:26
I saw my doctor again today to get the results of my ultrasound. Only thing that showed up was fatty liver. Not thrilling news, but something that can be addressed. Apparently my hemoglobin is the "high end of normal", and I don't know what to make of that.
He wants me to take omeprazole again for a couple of weeks and if that doesn't help my digestive issues, he'll refer me for further investigation: presumably a colonoscopy.
I've had abdominal pain for two weeks now and I'm pretty terrified.
Hey SE it's just a blip in your HA I know that you know that :) You are strong person you will get through this I am sure of that mate then you can start recovering again ATB
If your haemoglobin is at the high end of normal you're not bleeding from a tumour in your digestive tract. Why would you need to be referred for a colonoscopy?
---------- Post added at 13:07 ---------- Previous post was at 13:04 ----------
And how are the neurological symptoms? Do you still have them along with the abdominal pain?
ServerError
15-12-17, 13:10
I'm not noticing the neurological symptoms as much, which I think is telling. It's still there to an extent but it's not hitting me like it was.
I can't say for certain what the doctor was thinking. He just said that, if the omeprazole doesn't make me feel any better, we'll have to look at a referral.
So he thinks that you have acid reflux and the PPI will help to reduce the amount of acid your stomach is producing (probably due to anxiety). Are you still getting the globus sensation? The PPI should help with that if you are.
ServerError
15-12-17, 19:00
I'm really really scared...
I'm nauseous, I do have what I think is a globus sensation, I feel emotionally empty, numb and flat. My abdomen hasn't been working right for about three weeks now. Sometimes it really hurts. Sometimes it just feels like I've been winded. I have no appetite and barely use the toilet anymore.
It just feels like this is what's going to take me...
How are you finding Duloxetine? It might be time to increase dose if you feel anxiety is taking hold of you, Server. I really don't believe you're suffering from anything more sinister than IBS-type symptoms, and perhaps some side effects from new med.
ServerError
15-12-17, 19:22
I stopped taking the duloxetine. I wasn't liking how I felt, but I accept it probably wasn't the duloxetine actually causing it.
My doctor was annoyed at me being switched by his colleague so soon after restarting sertraline, so I've gone back on that. My doctor said to me that we won't be messing about with brain chemistry like this anymore and that we're sticking with sertraline until such a time as we can make a judgement.
I cannot believe how nauseous I feel, and I don't understand how my bowels can just lock up like this. Trying to believe it's a benign condition but it's so hard.
I stopped taking the duloxetine. I wasn't liking how I felt, but I accept it probably wasn't the duloxetine actually causing it.
My doctor was annoyed at me being switched by his colleague so soon after restarting sertraline, so I've gone back on that. My doctor said to me that we won't be messing about with brain chemistry like this anymore and that we're sticking with sertraline until such a time as we can make a judgement.
I cannot believe how nauseous I feel, and I don't understand how my bowels can just lock up like this. Trying to believe it's a benign condition but it's so hard.
Ah, I see. That will mess up brain chemistry for a while then, so the spike in anxiety could be a temporary side effect you'll have to endure for a few days. Shouldn't think it will last longer - and TBH - I didn't concur with the idea of you swapping to Dulox in the first place. But now it's done and I think you should rationalise symptoms to reflect these events.
You are not dying, Server. You know deep down this is anxiety playing tricks on the mind :lac:
---------- Post added at 19:49 ---------- Previous post was at 19:38 ----------
PS I just read back re Dulox. I would be annoyed at that doc too. I think it was the wrong decision when Sert had worked so well and helped you in the past...
I'm really really scared...
I'm nauseous, I do have what I think is a globus sensation, I feel emotionally empty, numb and flat. My abdomen hasn't been working right for about three weeks now. Sometimes it really hurts. Sometimes it just feels like I've been winded. I have no appetite and barely use the toilet anymore.
It just feels like this is what's going to take me...
I think that's such a common feeling. You suddenly think... this is it. This is the actual thing that's going to get me. And it seems so unavoidable and true. You can't see a recovery. It seems impossible that the intense physical symptoms are anything other than life threatening. At least, that's how I have felt. Here's hoping we're both wrong.
It goes without saying that gastro problems are so common, particularly with anxiety, and are nearly always nothing!
ServerError
16-12-17, 01:03
Thanks for the kind words guys. Always appreciated.
It's just not sinking in at the moment. I feel doomed. I'm convinced this is going to be it.
Has your doctor referred you to a neurologist yet?
ServerError
16-12-17, 05:06
Yeah, I was referred a couple of weeks ago.
It's not the neurological stuff that's got me feeling so doomed, though.
No it’s the problems with your stomach which could have come about as a consequence of your extreme anxiety about MS.
You may feel 'doomed' at the moment SE but remember Feelings aren't always Facts and this is one of those times, keep looking for the light at the end of the dark tunnel and find it, which Iam sure you will, you are much stronger than you think. ATB :)
ServerError
18-12-17, 11:19
I'm in a bad place, guys. Just had enormous panic attack.
Been awake all night with agonising pain in my rectal area. There's no relief from it at all. I feel as if it's radiating into my genitals and my upper legs.
I'm absolutely terrified of what this could be. I've been straining on the toilet so I'm trying to tell myself it's an injury, but it's the fact I can't relax or get any relief...
SE that's terrible mate, ok right have you been to your drs (if not make a appointment or go to a walk in center or if you really think it's that's bad (which it probably isn't) go to A&E You are really spiralling out of control come on fellow you are much stronger than this ATB
Look up levator ani syndrome. It's an extension of proctalgia fugax (associated with IBS). It's when the levator ani muscle goes into spasm. It's very painful and distressing but benign.
---------- Post added at 12:55 ---------- Previous post was at 12:52 ----------
When your gut slows down and you are regularly trying to "go" it can send the levator ani into spasm. You may find baclofen helps or else diazepam as a muscle relaxant. Most GPs won't have a clue about this. I was diagnosed by a gastroenterologist.
^^^^^agree.
I didn't know the correct names but my immediate thought was muscle spasm. Maybe caused by your straining. It will pass but I've had it myself and I agree, it is very painful, as are all muscle spasms and cramps.
Hope your panic has settled a bit now.:hugs:
MyNameIsTerry
18-12-17, 14:37
Yes, listen to pulisa on this one.
It sounds like a spasm to me with it pulsating & spreading. Muscle or nerve spasms can he very unpleasant as I found earlier in the year when I went through a month or so of spasms in my neck. It made my head crunch into my neck, my face grimace and sleeping was a no chance the first nights until it calmed down.
Straining is really advised against, you could cause a tear or have piles to deal with. So, keep your fibre & water going in and hopefully nature will take it's course. Anxiety really messes this up so it can be either the runs or constipation. It's easy to become obsessed with bowel movements, been there done that, but your body can handle some temporary changes.
Levator ani spasm is something I'm prone to as I have slow gut transit as a result of anxiety and IBS. The pain is absolutely excruciating and constant. It isn't fleeting like proctalgia fugax. There is plenty of info about it online. I was prescribed baclofen. You need appropriate anti-spasmodic pain relief. It will take the edge off. You also need laxatives to ensure a "smooth passage" and to stimulate your gut transit-the more you leave it the more backed-up you will get.
ServerError
18-12-17, 18:14
Once again my doctor is on leave, so I saw a different one today.
She examined me and doesn't think anything serious is going on. But she didn't prescribe anything. Just said to monitor it and come back if it continues. I guess I'll ask about a laxative then.
So nothing for the pain SE? As per the previous reply that's terrible ATB
ServerError
18-12-17, 18:26
Nothing for the pain. Got told to stop taking paracetamol due to the risk of accidental overdose. So I'm stuck with this.
I’ve had this too and I wasn’t straining. I put it down to tensing my muscles. I actually woke up with it a couple of times. The pain was awful and hung about for a long time. I had so many stupid symptoms when I had HA that I didn’t even speak to my doctor about this one. I just put it down to anxiety. Don’t forget server, sinister conditions are rarely painful until the end and you wouldn’t be on here if that was the case.
ServerError
18-12-17, 23:02
Did your pain go away in the end, swajj?
Yes and so will your pain server. I was getting it regularly but since I recovered I haven’t had it at all. Even when it let up I could still faintly feel it for the whole day. I have also had it come on, last a couple of hours, go away and come back again an hour later. It is the worst pain because you can’t do anything for it. A cramp in your foot you can massage but that area you can’t. I use to remind myself that it was just being caused by muscle tension and that helped to ease the pain. Has your pain eased off?
ServerError
18-12-17, 23:15
It's perhaps eased off a bit. In fact, yes, the pain has eased. The discomfort is still there. Those are two different things to me, pain and discomfort. I guess I just have to accept it's a muscle spasm that will settle down in time.
Yes ��
---------- Post added at 08:49 ---------- Previous post was at 08:48 ----------
omg I will never get used to using the right one :)
ServerError
19-12-17, 03:38
Guys, is it really possible I could have all this abdominal pain due to stress/anxiety, and that it could persist this long?
MyNameIsTerry
19-12-17, 04:32
Every time I wake I feel an increase I tension that lasts for hours until it fades. It's been going on for well over 5 years almost daily. Could that be just anxiety or must it be something else?
Examine the facts about anxiety. Fight or flight includes the gut & bowels. Part of the response is to empty them or slow them down so we are ready to run faster or fight harder...A bit like an anaconda!
So, ramp up your anxiety levels for a long period and you would expect to be having various problems in these areas from constipation to loose stools as well as changes in size, and nausea to inability to eat with acid issues and food sensitivities.
The gut is intimately linked to good brain health and everything else in your body. You have the majority of your genes in the gut. Microflora influences mood. The vagus nerve can trigger the fear response from the gut-to-brain or brain-to-gut route along different channels according to studies in rats.
Through it off and you suffer in many ways. Just look how Ill you can feel from sickness bugs and how draining they are. The people on here who suffer from inflammatory disorders in these areas will I'm sure know how unwell they make you feel.
We underestimate the gut & bowels. Remember the old joke story about the organs of the body getting together to decide who was most important?
ServerError
19-12-17, 04:40
Fair enough, Terry! I take your point.
I've actually been waking up in the middle of really intense panic attacks. My panic attacks had cleared up completely, but they're back with a vengeance. For me personally, they're not the worst part of an anxiety disorder. I see them as an unpleasant nuisance.
I often wish I could "just" have a panic attack and then have done with it. Dealing with an entrenched anxiety disorder and all the physical symptoms it can involve on a 24/7 basis (some very weird) is exhausting and debilitating but ultimately all these symptoms are harmless but try telling your frazzled brain that when on high alert..
You will come through this, server. You have to believe us. We have been through all this too and survived.
---------- Post added at 08:17 ---------- Previous post was at 08:14 ----------
I often wake up at night with what some would class a panic attack but I just adopt the "meh" attitude..To me this is small fry-the worst is the constant agitation and physical symptoms which don't let up.
ServerError
21-12-17, 02:03
I've had a better couple of days - far from perfect but no panic attacks and my symptoms have eased off a bit so I've been in less pain.
One thing I have noticed - and am of course starting to worry about - is my urine. I seem to be going less even though I'm drinking water, and when I do go, it's dark. Doesn't look to the naked eye like it contains blood. Just dark yellow/orange.
Can this be another benign anxiety symptom?
I often wake up at night with what some would class a panic attack but I just adopt the "meh" attitude..To me this is small fry-the worst is the constant agitation and physical symptoms which don't let up.
Totally agree, Pulisa. I couldn't give two hoots about panic attacks. They're annoying, but harmless. That's why I get so frustrated with all the CBT emphasis on them, talking you down and telling you that you aren't going to die. Duh. And when they do focus on HA, again, it's only on the physical symptoms of panic - raised heart rate, trouble breathing, feeling dizzy etc. What about the relentless, life-destroying health anxiety and all that comes with it? Help me with that!
---------- Post added at 20:49 ---------- Previous post was at 20:46 ----------
Server, are you also urinating more frequently as well, without increasing water intake to compensate? Anxiety can make you do that, and if so, it's probably more concentrated because you're dehyrated
ServerError
21-12-17, 05:04
I've been urinating less frequently. Although I drank some water and ithen urinated and it was much lighter, so I dunno.
A few weeks ago my husband commented a few times that he'd noticed that about his pee, when he was drinking lots of water, then it just stopped and went back to normal. I know my metabolism goes a bit haywire when I'm really anxious. All that adrenaline plays havoc with your digestive/excretory systems (as well as every bloody thing else!). Sounds like it's sorting itself out already for you, in any case. Take care
MyNameIsTerry
21-12-17, 05:23
Urine darkens as you move into dehydration and lightens as you become more hydrated.
By the time your urine has darkened you are already dehydrated.
The above according to Bear Grylls in one of his books when discussing dehydration. :yesyes:
Melfish - CBT goes way beyond addressing symptoms. Over here though there is a major emphasis on exposure and you will be lucky to find people on here discussing one of the biggest elements of CBT - Cognitive Restructuring.
I need some cognitive restructuring, no question
Me too! Where's that neuro screwdriver when you need it?:D
Can you imagine getting Cognitive Restructuring on the NHS, Terry?
Think it's quite rare and is probably only found at a higher level of CBT I am still waiting for CBT my self the 'office' CPN thinks I wont benefit from it even though I told them I have OCD at this rate I will never get better:huh: SE if you are really still unsure about your urine colour have it checked out at your dr's also glad you aren't in much pain now and you haven't had a panic attack for a couple of days so you are on the mend:yesyes:ATB
I’ve come to realise that urine colour doesn’t mean much of anything. I wish I could have realised that in 2013 before I hopped on the health anxiety bus. I try to remember what set me off then. I know it was 2013 because I just checked my PMs and I had a couple from RLR in response to mine. I contacted him because I was worried about my urine being dark all the time. He basically said it was irrelevant. My old doctor said it was irrelevant too. He said if urine is dark then drink more water. I was too far into by then though and it took me years to accept that it was normal. If you are looking at urine colour charts on the web then stop. According to those charts my urine colour was never normal. The odd thing was that whenever my urine was tested the lab report always stated “colour -straw”. To me it looked dark. Drink 2 litres of water minimum a day. If you are big then drink more.
ServerError
31-12-17, 03:47
Psychologically, the last couple of weeks have seen an improvement. Perhaps going back on the sertraline has helped. The panic attacks have stopped and I've felt less anxious generally, which is good.
I've got my neurology appointment on Tuesday, but I'm less worried about this than I was. I'm still having vague symptoms in my toes that feel strange, but I'm much less convinced it's something like MS.
Bowel-wise, things are still troubling me. I'm "regular" again, thankfully, and my appetite has come back to an extent, if not quite fully. However, I'm still experiencing periods of pain and cramping in my lower abdomen, and I sometimes feel nauseous. It sounds like IBS to me. I really don't want to go down the testing avenue. Unless the doctor says I need to, I'm not going to. I'll let him attempt to treat me for IBS and I'll try to help myself as well.
I just hope this does eventually go away...
Psychologically, the last couple of weeks have seen an improvement. Perhaps going back on the sertraline has helped. The panic attacks have stopped and I've felt less anxious generally, which is good.
..
That's what I think, personally. I don't know if you wanted my two cents, but you have it anyway. Happy holidays ;)
MyNameIsTerry
31-12-17, 05:05
Very glad to hear you are feeling better. It seems like you respond quickly.
So, if you look back over this thread and see how you were talking can you see things more objectively now? Are you finding your thinking is less intense?
Just reducing anxiety levels alone makes a massive difference in Obsessive-compulsive style disorders from my experience and that of everyone on here I've ever talked to about this. And the opposite is true too, spike the anxiety and the mind gets much more obsessive to the point of it being hard to be able to think about other things.
Have a good Christmas & New Year. I hope we have the old SE back very soon. :yesyes:
To me your abdo symptoms sound like typical IBS. I'm sure you would have a similar opinion if you hadn't had this intense anxiety episode and someone else were posting with your symptoms. I have no doubt that the "old SE" will be back very soon. Get the neuro appointment done and dusted and carry on getting better without thinking too much of what has happened in these last few weeks.
I hope that 2018 will be the start of much happier and more fulfilling times for you. You more than deserve it.
ServerError
31-12-17, 08:22
As far as you guys know, can IBS be constant? I ask because I don't get much relief at the moment. It does ebb and flow, but there's always something there.
Am I right in thinking it will go away with patience?
Usually getting rid of IBS requires diet changes, a set schedule and sometimes medication.
ServerError
31-12-17, 08:34
So I'm stuck like this until I hit on a magic formula? Brilliant...
Annaboodle
31-12-17, 10:10
Hi Server. I've had IBS since my late teens. I have times where it is constant, in that I get cramps and aches on and off and an awareness of what my stomach is doing all the time. Then I'll get longer periods where it goes away. It's always bad if I'm particularly anxious or stressed. If anything traumatic happens I might as well sit glued to the toilet for a couple of days. My IBS is very much affected by my diet. I know that if I avoid wheat, dairy and caffeine, which are the things I've worked out by elimination, I can control it. I often don't stick to it though, but times when it really flares up if I cut those out it helps a lot. My IBS is always loose bowels though, so in some ways maybe easier to work out what helps when that's the main symptom. I know you're good at controlling your diet though from what you've said, which is why I mention it. If you have strong will power you will definitely find a way to control it if it is IBS.
ServerError
31-12-17, 10:28
I do wonder if this might be Crohn's disease...
I do wonder if this might be Crohn's disease...
I have to say mate, this is as clear of an anxiety/IBS problem as I have ever seen in my life. The two generally go hand in hand, and one directly magnifies the effect of the other.
It speaks volumes that your MS concerns have all but disappeared in the time this thread was started as your attentions have switched.
Physically, you are totally fine bud, no doubt about it. Just need to get yourself out of the hole you have dug yourself in.
I had a MHC after a really bad bout about neuro diseases 2 years ago. The power that stress and fear can have is truly overwhelming. But you already know this, just beat it man.
Sleeping pills really helped me, I was living on 2-3 hours sleep a night for months at my worst so when I managed to double that with some pills. I very slowly started to get better. Might be worth a try.
Server I have been following your thread but dont feel that I have anything to offer.
I will say though that your most recent posts seem to show that you are getting some logical thinking back which is great. (I hope that comes across the way I meant it)
Good luck for Tuesday, though I have no doubt that you will not need it.
It will be interesting to see if your stomach problems calm down a bit once it is over.
I believe that FMP has an excellent link for diet info for those suffering IBS symptoms but for the life of me I cant remember where I saw it.
All the best and keep us posted
MyNameIsTerry
31-12-17, 11:54
Like Anna says, it's a flare up. So, this may settle down now that your anxiety is fading a bit. Judge it more then because as the above poster mentions, they tend to go hand in hand and let's not forget that part of the fight or flight response is actually evacuation so that could have been a factor for you.
Another member, Annie, has talked about her constant IBS bouts in the past. It's a big part of her anxiety flare ups if I recall rightly? Does anyone remember? Elen or pulisa might as she used to be a regular but we don't see her much nowadays.
We have Crohns sufferers on here who will probably know more and the differences but be wary of the mind jumping to conclusions right now, you know how common IBS is on here and you have people telling you how it can be constant.
---------- Post added at 11:54 ---------- Previous post was at 11:47 ----------
Found Annie:
http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=194350
I'm sure she was talking about how FODMAP helped her symptoms?
I hope she is doing well, she was a lovely member, always supportive of others no matter how bad she felt.
Thanks Terry FODMAP is what I was thinking off.
It is meant to be very effective
I had the same happen to me in summer 2016. I was convinced of MS. It started with a numb big toe. It was numb for a month or longer, and felt very very cold although on touch it was warm. I also got tingling in my hands and feet, and even thighs and face.
I was defficient in iron. Wasn't deficient in B12, but started to take it and it sort of helped. Also found a manual on trigger points and found several in my calf. Massaged it for a week or so and it subsided. Other symptoms went away with B vitamin supplements.
I do wonder if this might be Crohn's disease...
Crohn's disease is generally autoimmune. You don't have anything that indicates it. But if you've read Imeleedi's and Mel's posts, your IBS issues correlate with your high anxiety. I think it's much more likely that your upset digestive system is caused and/or exacerbated by your anxiety.
Before I got PTSD, I had heartburn maybe once or twice a year. After PTSD, my anxiety became so high that I produced so much stomach acid that I developed GERD. I'm lucky I never got an ulcer. After since calming my anxiety down to manageable levels, my GERD has pretty much went away.
My story just shows you the powerful connection between anxiety and the digestive system. It also makes sense considering that the digestive system is also a big user of serotonin.
MyNameIsTerry
01-01-18, 04:54
My story just shows you the powerful connection between anxiety and the digestive system. It also makes sense considering that the digestive system is also a big user of serotonin.
Direct channel via the Vagus nerve and able to tell the brain to panic along a separate channel to the brain telling the stomach it's fight or flight time. And the more they are finding how git flora impacts mental health.
I think that's really important and when you think how diet impacts us in so many ways, it makes sense. I remember reading how recent studies have shown gut flora changes based on diet so that it can be expecting a certain diet and how this is likely at a cost of the balance we need. This makes me wonder whether in the future we will get confirmation that certain diets change gut flora therefore changing mental health. It feels like we are heading in that direction.
Most of our genes are in the gut. We know methylation acts to change genes or switch then on or off. The gut seems incredibly important when you consider all this.
Brain Serotonin is small fry compared to the rest. The gut uses plenty but then so do our muscles as I seem to recall it is used in muscle contraction. When you consider the CNS and all this hypnik jerking it makes we wonder about muscle Serotonin too.
ServerError
02-01-18, 16:28
I saw the neurologist today. He doesn't think there's anything neurological going on, but he's sending me for an MRI scan. He was pretty adamant that it's just precautionary. I'm not too worried.
Going back to my GP next week. I guess I'll be sent to a gastroenterologist.
Why? You have no red flag symptoms and nothing that doesn't indicate anxiety-induced IBS/gastric upset.
I saw the neurologist today. He doesn't think there's anything neurological going on, but he's sending me for an MRI scan. He was pretty adamant that it's just precautionary. I'm not too worried.
Going back to my GP next week. I guess I'll be sent to a gastroenterologist.
Try and draw a line under all this and move on, Server. You've had a rough few months and I now think concentrating on your mental health is the way forward. I agree with Pulisa in that your symptoms are very much connected to your state of mind and anxiety disorder rather than a sinister physical illness.
I remember you saying that you didn't push for unnecessary referrals so don't do it now? Your doctor should be making a referral based on clinical need. As KK says, try and draw a line under this and concentrate on putting a mental break on your HA? You've got to have an MRI as a "precaution" which is neuro CYA material but leave it at that otherwise you are still caught up in the mire.
ServerError
03-01-18, 09:19
Good points, guys. I'm not planning to push for anything. My doctor has mentioned sending me for further investigation in the past, so I just assumed that's what he would do next. Probably a bit of negative thinking on my part.
To be honest, my symptoms haven't gotten any worse, and they do come and go. Although they don't go completely. It's true that there's no red flags. I'll see what my GP says next week.
I'm taking sertraline again, as you know, and I'm very lucky in that my dad is paying for me to see a therapist. She's been off over Christmas so I haven't seen her for a while but I will see her again next week. So I am working on this. I'll get better.
Of course you will and I'm sure your Dad is only too pleased to be able to play his part in your recovery. It's good to have your family supporting you and I'm sure they have hated seeing you suffer like this.
Onwards and upwards now!
Good points, guys. I'm not planning to push for anything. My doctor has mentioned sending me for further investigation in the past, so I just assumed that's what he would do next. Probably a bit of negative thinking on my part.
To be honest, my symptoms haven't gotten any worse, and they do come and go. Although they don't go completely. It's true that there's no red flags. I'll see what my GP says next week.
I'm taking sertraline again, as you know, and I'm very lucky in that my dad is paying for me to see a therapist. She's been off over Christmas so I haven't seen her for a while but I will see her again next week. So I am working on this. I'll get better.
Glad to read this Server. This definitely sounds like the Server I got to see recover previously :) You're seeing the light at the end of the tunnel again. I have a good feeling about this. Consider this episode just a detour...
Positive thoughts
ServerError
08-01-18, 15:41
Unfortunately, I'm still struggling. Mentally, I'm arguably a little better than I was, but physically, I'm still struggling, which is leading to worrying thoughts.
I'm seeing the doctor again tomorrow, and I'm starting to worry about all manner of diseases. I have a feeling of food not going down properly, as if there is something stuck in my throat. My stomach and bowels feel uncomfortable and occasionally painful.
I'm starting to think I might have a stomach ulcer or Barrett's esophagus or worse.
I thought that you had accepted and were having treatment for your diagnosed reflux though?
I take it you accept that you no longer have MS/ neuro issues?
I'm sure you can see that your HA is just moving onto another familiar target? I suppose your GP will refer you to a gastroenterologist tomorrow unless you have the courage of your conviction and say no, no more referrals or tests, this is classic HA and my GP is not going to collude in making it continue. I have no red flags and there is no clinical need for a referral because this just prolongs the agony...?
I'm sure you can see that your HA is just moving onto another familiar target?
Spot on, Pulisa.
Server, no one is dismissing the fact that you have real physical symptoms (related or not to anxiety), but your HA is making you think the worst, and deep down you know this. Why can't it just be your IBS or reflux playing up, instead of something more serious and sinister such as an "ulcer" or "worse"?
Come on....you've been through this before and you have to believe you will prevail again.
Your GP might be able to prescribe something to ease symptoms you're experiencing. But be very wary of more "CYA" tests :lac:
Mindprison
08-01-18, 18:52
You beat this before server and I have no doubts you will again! It's just our old enemy health anxiety trying to pull you down with it again!
I know how difficult it is to say no to tests for "reassurance" which the GP so "kindly" suggests..but you in your heart of hearts know that more tests are just counterproductive and will lead onto a fresh set of symptoms once you have been given the all clear from the current issue. No one is denying that you have reflux and IBS but these are all pretty tame symptoms compared to what you fear you have thanks to HA..
MyNameIsTerry
09-01-18, 01:27
You've got to remember that anxiety waxes & wains. Some days can be hell, some not so much hell. The bad days feel like the end of the world when you are in a worse stage of anxiety like you are now.
I work on the principle that I disregard things until I see patterns. If something comes & goes, that not the same and the one day type symptoms are just part of either our strain due to mental health (and the physical impact that has on us) or just something I could have without anxiety.
The question to ask the GP is - do I truly need this test or is it for reassurance/ruling out. The latter can mean GP's do it to cross something off a list when really they already know it's formality. So, ask for your GP's opinion too. Would they bother if it were them? If they wouldn't, then it's about ticking an anxiety box.
I think the better the GP, the more confidence they have in their own ability to diagnose without the need for "reassuring" tests. I think the CYA approach by GPs is so detrimental to HA patients-GPs play their own part in encouraging and enabling HA too.
How accurate do you think gps are at getting Neuro things correct for example me and Parkinson's?mine just keeps constantly telling me it's stress but I just can't accept that with the symptoms I'm having the head tremors and that,I've demanded tests m
ServerError
09-01-18, 14:41
Thanks for your comments as always everyone.
I saw my GP and he has decided he wants to send me for an endoscopy to have a look at my esophagus and stomach. The thing is, he did say he still feels that nothing sinister is going on and that a point will come where we have to stop the investigations and focus on anxiety.
So lucky me, I'm having a camera shoved down my stomach!
Thanks for your comments as always everyone.
I saw my GP and he has decided he wants to send me for an endoscopy to have a look at my esophagus and stomach. The thing is, he did say he still feels that nothing sinister is going on and that a point will come where we have to stop the investigations and focus on anxiety.
So lucky me, I'm having a camera shoved down my stomach!
You can still focus on treating anxiety, Server. Did you not discuss increasing AD? Might be time to look at doing that on your next visit. You must still be on 50mg?
I hope you don't wait long for endoscopy anyway.
Well SE think he is just trying to reassure you and the obvious question is will you believe him/her when you get the 'all' clear?!! Good luck and I don't envy you one bit and as always update us when you know more ATB
ServerError
09-01-18, 15:07
If I get an all clear from an endoscopy I will definitely believe it. I'm not saying my anxiety will evaporate or tha I won't switch to something else, although of course I'll try not to. But I will believe the outcome of the test.
I did discuss a dosage increase and we've gone for it.
If I get an all clear from an endoscopy I will definitely believe it. I'm not saying my anxiety will evaporate or tha I won't switch to something else, although of course I'll try not to. But I will believe the outcome of the test.
I did discuss a dosage increase and we've gone for it.
Good move. I think it will help - and you can finally begin to move forward ;)
One positive thing to come out of having the procedure is you will be able to give your full attention to your therapy, instead of sitting there with part of your mind wondering if you have stomach cancer. You are doing the right thing.
Stopping the investigations and concentrating on the HA is the right approach and it's good that you have said that you will accept the endoscopy result. Just so long as your focus doesn't progress to your colon etc because you have spoken about these fears?
ServerError
09-01-18, 20:33
I can't tell you what will happen in the future. If my doctor tells me my endoscopy is clear and there will be no more tests, I'll move forward on that basis. That I do know. I can't promise other worries won't surface or resurface, but I will work with the knowledge that my doctor sees no need for more tests as I try to get back to better mental health.
At the moment, I'm in the grip of real fear that something is wrong in my digestive system. Cancer is not my primary concern, although it's there to an extent. Right now I'm worried my esophagus has broken some way, or that I have a stomach ulcer or an inflammatory bowel disease.
My son was born without an oesophagus. You would certainly know if yours was defective or "broken".
ServerError
09-01-18, 20:47
Wow, I had no idea! Is your son still young? Were they able to do something?
He's your age. His stomach has been lifted into his chest cavity. His stomach starts at the back of his mouth. He's fine and can eat big meals but his chest xrays cause palpitations in radiographers if we don't tell them his history!:D
He's your age. His stomach has been lifted into his chest cavity. His stomach starts at the back of his mouth. He's fine and can eat big meals but his chest xrays cause palpitations in radiographers if we don't tell them his history!:D
LMAO That is amazing! I can just picture their faces!
ServerError
16-01-18, 18:33
Unfortunately, things aren't really improving. Psychologically, I'm probably not in quite the state I was, but physically, something is wrong.
My entire digestive system is sore. In particular my esophagus and stomach just feel wrong. I constantly feel as if something is stuck in there. I do have an appetite, but the feeling means I'm reluctant to eat. My bowels are only working slowly these days. As well as this, I have these spells of feeling as if my entire body is on fire, prickling and stinging inside and out. It's as if I'm covered in a rash, although I'm clearly not.
Still waiting for my endoscopy appointment. Trying to stay positive but I'm naturally concerned about what they'll find.
Unfortunately, things aren't really improving. Psychologically, I'm probably not in quite the state I was, but physically, something is wrong.
My entire digestive system is sore. In particular my esophagus and stomach just feel wrong. I constantly feel as if something is stuck in there. I do have an appetite, but the feeling means I'm reluctant to eat. My bowels are only working slowly these days. As well as this, I have these spells of feeling as if my entire body is on fire, prickling and stinging inside and out. It's as if I'm covered in a rash, although I'm clearly not.
Still waiting for my endoscopy appointment. Trying to stay positive but I'm naturally concerned about what they'll find.
Did you have a calprotectin test?
ServerError
16-01-18, 18:44
I don't know. I've had blood tests.
Just looked at what a calprotectin test is. I did give a stool sample a few months back to check for h pylori, but I don't think I've had a calprotectin test.
As someone who watched you struggle and fight back, I just want to say I'm sorry to see you suffering again and I hope to see you overcome this blip. Your contributions during your recovery were so very insightful and helpful and I look forward to you returning to that state of mind
As always... sending
Positive thoughts
ServerError
16-01-18, 18:57
Thanks fishmanpa. I'd love to get back to where I was but it seems unlikely at the moment. Until someone can tell me what's going on, it's going to be very difficult.
I don't know. I've had blood tests.
Just looked at what a calprotectin test is. I did give a stool sample a few months back to check for h pylori, but I don't think I've had a calprotectin test.
It is a stool sample test that detects inflammination of the bowels it is s test for IBD basically crohns disease and the other ibd disease that skips my mind.i deffo think you should ask your gp for that test as it shows if there is any inflamination.good luck
ServerError
16-01-18, 19:12
I'm going to have to. I hate pushing for tests, but nobody else can feel what's going on inside me, so I'm going to have to get this done.
I'm pretty sure they will find inflammation. This has been going on for too long now. I appreciate that the MS fear was a bout of anxiety, but that anxiety could have triggered a flare up in an IBD.
I'm going to have to. I hate pushing for tests, but nobody else can feel what's going on inside me, so I'm going to have to get this done.
I'm pretty sure they will find inflammation. This has been going on for too long now. I appreciate that the MS fear was a bout of anxiety, but that anxiety could have triggered a flare up in an IBD.
Stress does not cause inflamination of the bowels it worsens the bowls if you have ibs but not ibd so if you have a calprotectin test and it is really high there will be something going on in there.let us know how you get on
I'm going to have to. I hate pushing for tests, but nobody else can feel what's going on inside me, so I'm going to have to get this done.
I'm pretty sure they will find inflammation. This has been going on for too long now. I appreciate that the MS fear was a bout of anxiety, but that anxiety could have triggered a flare up in an IBD.
Let the doctor decide on that one. Another test, another worry/HA focus. See how your mind is linking symptoms? Please don't push for tests which may be counterproductive to your recovery. Remember what your doc said about having a limit on tests and concentrating on your anxiety?
ServerError
16-01-18, 19:37
When my doctor actually draws the line under testing, I'll go with it. But we haven't done that yet. Meanwhile, my entire digestive system isn't working properly and I am pretty confident I'm heading for a Crohn's diagnosis.
Stop it, Server. You just don't know and this is causing you to panic and think the worst. I'm in a very similar position to you and know what it's like to experience a whole range of mystifying symptoms but you just can't chase a diagnosis
So sorry to read all this... I understand that something feels "very wrong" physically, but please heed Pulisa's words: let your GP decide, based on his professional judgement, whether you need more tests.
In the meantime, believing you have Crohn's disease is a big leap straight into the jaws of the HA beast. This is your anxiety speaking, not the logical Server we know.
ServerError
16-01-18, 21:37
Yeah, you're right as always. I've calmed down a bit since earlier on. It's all a bit of a rollercoaster at the moment!
MyNameIsTerry
17-01-18, 04:40
I'm really struggling now. I'm convinced this is MS or something serious. It seems so implausible that this could be anxiety. I can't believe this is actually happening to me...
^ remember that guy?
So, what's different about the GI issue? If you remove all physical symptoms and concentrate on your thoughts, feelings and emotions can you say it's different from that guy?
---------- Post added at 04:40 ---------- Previous post was at 04:34 ----------
Yeah, you're right as always. I've calmed down a bit since earlier on. It's all a bit of a rollercoaster at the moment!
This is something to remember. It peaks & drops. In the peaks it's horrible and in the drops there is some relief as well as more rational thinking.
Emotional Reasoning. One of the Cognitive Distortions. And like the others it sucks you into a spiral of the other CD's are working together against you. Catastrophizing, Minimisation & Maximisation, Jumping To Conclusions, All-Or-Nothing Thinking, etc.
You can do it but perhaps not in the peaks right now so bounce things off your supporters and as the drops come evaluate what is said and reframe a conclusion. You just did this.
I’m a person who pushed for tests because of problems with my digestive system. I had many of the symptoms of IBD, stomach cancer and pancreatic cancer. I ended up in ER a couple of times. Then I started pushing for the tests. I started with the least invasive tests and gradually worked my way up to the more invasive ones eg colonoscopy. I had a GI doctor who thought there was nothing wrong with me but agreed to do the colonoscopy because of the constant changes I was experiencing with my bowel movements. I paid thousands of dollars to get all my tests. Was it all for nothing? Well the GI doctor did find a benign polyp and removed it so I guess so. But the polyp had absolutely nothing to do with my symptoms. That was all anxiety. btw through all of that my GI doctor said a stool test was not a reliable test for cancer etc. He didn’t even bother to ask me to do one.
My point is that you can be utterly convinced that anxiety cannot cause the kind of symptoms that you have. I was but I was wrong.
Hey Server,
Just thought I'd reply and give you my sympathies. I'm going down a bit of an MS rabbit hole myself at the moment. A few weeks ago I was worried about bowel stuff. I'm like you in reverse.
I'm sure you'll be OK. It all sounds like anxiety to me. You have my best wishes.
ServerError
18-01-18, 02:31
Thanks for the support eveyone. Always appreciated.
I didn't go to the doctor today. I decided not to. I don't want to chase tests. I had a therapy appointment so I went there instead. Much more productive behaviour.
I had a much better day in general. Symptoms were much reduced and I was calmer. Just got to keep moving forward really.
Really pleased to hear this, Server. In my opinion you made absolutely the right decision. I hope you feel calmer and more positive today too.
Annaboodle
18-01-18, 10:45
That's great to hear Server. Hope today is better too.
That's excellent news.
Hope things like this help you rationalise that it is your mind.
You sound better. The doubts will probably start to creep in again though. Just keep reminding yourself that HA can cause all of the symptoms you have been experiencing. I used to find that when I started panicking about a symptom it would become more and more intense. I could get a pain in my shoulder that under normal circumstances would be mildly uncomfortable. But my mind would go straight to cancer and the pain would become excruciating. I’ve mentioned before how I walked around with my arm in a sling for a while because the pain was so bad. lol So one thing that helped me when my mind started to focus on some symptom was to remind myself that HA can cause those types of symptoms.
ServerError
24-01-18, 11:41
Just an update, really.
I went to the doctor on Monday because I had to get a form for administrative reasons I won't go into here. While there, I talked about the illnesses I was worried I had. The weird thing is, he didn't go out of his way to reassure me, yet I came away feeling better anyway. The biggest deal of all is that he offered me the calprotectin test for IBD and I declined!
He said I could have it if I wanted it but I couldn't get him to decide for me, so I chose to take that as a sign he didn't think it was essential and I declined it. He said I did have inflammation markers checked for in my blood tests and they were negative, so there we are. He also said that, although he can say nothing for certain, my symptoms weren't immediately suggestive of the nasty things I feared and that his expectation would be some gastritis and esophagitis on my endoscopy, and that this would be related to my anxious state.
I've been feeling miles better since then, including symptom-wise. My esophagus, which I was convinced was badly damaged, has settled down a lot and my stomach isn't hurting anymore.
Things aren't perfect. I still feel on edge and can't really shake that off, but I know that's something that takes time to die down. My sleep is a disaster zone and you should see the state of my room. Nothing represents the state of my mental health better than my room. But there's been an improvement so I will try to move forward again.
That's such an achievement to turn down that wretched IBD test!! It's a major turning point for you and yes, the doubts will creep in but it looks as though your doctor is actually helping you as opposed to enabling your HA which is what so many do.
You are certainly going to feel on edge but compared to all the ghastly physical symptoms of the past weeks it's a relatively minor legacy of relentless anxiety and adrenaline overload. I'm glad also that you are more comfortable about your oesophagus-once you focus on that area the feelings are with you all the time and it's very distressing.
Sounds as though you are progressing very much in the right direction. The room can wait and I'm sure the sleep will improve the more settled your days become on a regular basis.
Thanks for posting, Server. I'm so pleased things are looking up for you.
MyNameIsTerry
24-01-18, 15:32
Nice work, SE :yesyes::yahoo:
It's going to keep nagging at you but this is an important step and the more you keep heading in the direction of recovery the more that will change.
I completely agree with you on the impact to the body. Initially I was just a complete mess and I feel it's taken me a long time to adjust back from that but I can see a lot of difference.
Just an update, really.
I went to the doctor on Monday because I had to get a form for administrative reasons I won't go into here. While there, I talked about the illnesses I was worried I had. The weird thing is, he didn't go out of his way to reassure me, yet I came away feeling better anyway. The biggest deal of all is that he offered me the calprotectin test for IBD and I declined!
That's the SE I know ;) Good work!
Positive thoughts
ServerError
06-02-18, 19:56
I had my MRI scan yesterday. Not the nicest experience being shoved into a tube unable to move and surrounded by deafening noise, but it was fine. The fear of neurological illness that I went through has pretty much subsided, so I'm just hoping there's nothing unexpected to be found. I doubt there will be.
Having my gastroscopy on Saturday. My dad feels really sorry for me because of how invasive it is, but I'm not too bothered about it. I'm sure it'll be unpleasant on the day, but I'm not worried about the procedure. I may or may not have sedation. Haven't secided yet.
I'm a little concerned about what they might find as my osaphagus and upper stomach are still not feeling right, but my symptoms in general have calmed down a lot. I've certainly not become any more unwell than I was. Arguably I'm somewhat better.
Mentally I'm much better. That's the sertraline, I guess. It's an incredible medication when it works for you. It's been making me feel quite drowsy, but I'm not too bothered about that.
You sound much stronger mentally, Server. I'm please that the sertraline is helping but I'm sure that you are doing a fair bit yourself. One test down, one to go-all the very best for Saturday.
I had slight numbness in my toes and fingers, face, foot, calf. With tingling too! It's so scary!! Along with other symptoms too.
Saw 3 neurologists and had 2 MRI's and all ok - no MS!
It could be a trapped nerve, nerve compression, thyroid problems, chronic hyperventilation syndrome also does weird stuff! Or just anxiety! :) I bet your MRI will come back normal too!
Mindprison
06-02-18, 23:41
Gastroscopy is a cinch. I was super worried about it the weeks leading up to it but when I got there I had a spurt of bravery thanks to the rather good looking nurse taking care of me. I opted for the throat spray, whole thing was done in 15 minutes.
Not the most pleasant experience and i'd rather not go through it again, but it's over and done with in no time!
My symptoms were agonizing (and still can be at times) but knowing what it was helped me to deal with it better. Stomach issues are actually quite easily dealt with these days, i've been managing mine for about 12 years now so it's nothing to worry about.
WiseMonkey
07-02-18, 01:05
I have CFS which has some similarities with MS. I can't speak for MS, but if you had CFS, you would have a lot more extreme symptoms. CFS is a debilitating condition with symptoms that stop people from 'normal functioning'. It doesn't start with small symptoms like odd sensations - it's clearly a big illness from the start, though it takes a long time to rule out other causes/conditions.
If I just had numbness in fingers and toes like you do, I'd be so grateful. I am very much disabled; my symptoms are much more extreme and fit the totality of the CFS description.
Hi lior, sorry you are having such a bad time with your CFS. I also have it and have had it for 25+ years. Mine had a slow on-set with vague symptoms, then more neurological symptoms. Fortunately I'm on the lower end of the sliding scale, so can work part time, exercise and generally engage in life quite well. I get flares every now and then. :)
---------- Post added at 01:05 ---------- Previous post was at 00:58 ----------
I saw the neurologist today. He doesn't think there's anything neurological going on, but he's sending me for an MRI scan. He was pretty adamant that it's just precautionary. I'm not too worried.
Going back to my GP next week. I guess I'll be sent to a gastroenterologist.
Hi,
I had to have an MRI to rule out MS, turned out it was CFS.
CSF, MS, Crohns, IBS, Fibromyalgia, Thyroid, are all autoimmune conditions and usually someone else is the family has one or two of them.
ServerError
07-02-18, 01:50
This where the debate raging elsewhere about posting all in one place or starting multiple threads becomes relevant.
I got over the MS fear once I was back on the sertraline. That's done with as far as I'm concerned.
This thread, despite its name, has become more about digestive issues, which have been a bigger concern and for which I'm having a gastroscopy.
But, to be honest, the main reason I continue to post in here is just to keep people updated because it's nice to know how things work out and it may help others in the future who come across the thread. I'm not looking for reassurance anymore, although I accept that could flare up again.
Thanks to everyone who's taken the time to say anything reassuring to me, though. It's been a help and I'm pleased to be climbing out of this again. I'll let everyone know how the gastroscopy goes.
I appreciate that you post here. I like the updates. I think it's important to remind people this is a journey.
WiseMonkey
07-02-18, 03:19
Gastroscopy is a cinch. I was super worried about it the weeks leading up to it but when I got there I had a spurt of bravery thanks to the rather good looking nurse taking care of me. I opted for the throat spray, whole thing was done in 15 minutes.
Not the most pleasant experience and i'd rather not go through it again, but it's over and done with in no time!.
I've had a couple of gastroscopies over the years and it's ezy pezy! Opt for the sedation, you can still be interactive but forget all about it afterwards.
Would rather have an gastroscopy/endoscopy than a colonoscopy. Have had a couple of those too!
Good luck with it all :)
I think your thread is proof that people only need one thread. Threads evolve as this one has. I started it in November and I read it whenever you post an update. And I agree with pulisa you sound much better. You’ve given up a lot of your time to help others here. Good luck with your procedure.
---------- Post added at 19:36 ---------- Previous post was at 19:36 ----------
you started it in November
lol
I think your thread is proof that people only need one thread. Threads evolve as this one has. I started it in November and I read it whenever you post an update. And I agree with pulisa you sound much better. You’ve given up a lot of your time to help others here. Good luck with your procedure.
---------- Post added at 19:36 ---------- Previous post was at 19:36 ----------
you started it in November
lol
I think this is a great example of how the one thread per person works and how one set of symptoms replace another as the anxious mind focusses on different diseases. You have always worked very hard to rise above your HA and any reassurance you have received on here has been used positively and obviously to good effect in conjunction with meds and professional therapy.
I hope you will continue to update us because I think you have been through the mill and back but have kept going and are proof that people can rise above HA with the right attitude and plenty of determination and I'm sure that many on here will read your thread and benefit from your insight.
ServerError
10-02-18, 17:12
Well, I've had my gastroscopy. Sort of...
Unfortunately, I was unable to complete it. Try as I might, the strangeness and discomfort of the experience beat me and we had to stop about half way through.
The good news is they got a good look at my esophagus, which is the area of most concern to me. I was surprised when they told me they didn't observe any damage or problems other than stomach contents rising up - exactly the condition I'm already being treated for.
Although cancer always seemed unlikely based on my symptoms, I was concerned about Barrett's esophagus or a hiatal hernia, but there was none of that. There wasn't even any esophagitis, which I was very surprised to hear given the extent of my discomfort.
Essentially, what we've seen today has further confirmed the diagnosis of GERD. They gave me some paperwork on how to manage it, including dietary advice, so that's my next step.
Other than that, I have to go back to my GP to discuss the findings and then we can decide if we want to have another go in order to get to the stomach and duodenum. I'll go with my doctor's advice on that one, although I think I'd be okay now I know what to expect.
I opted for sedation, and while it was relaxing to an extent, it didn't have the effect on me they hoped for. I was a little more "with it" than they would have liked, and the throat spray didn't achieve the level of numbness hoped for either, unfortunately. Nevertheless, the sedation did feel quite nice and I'd definitely do it that way if I had to do it again. What I would say is that, even though I couldn't quite get all the way through the procedure, and although it really isn't very nice, it's not something to spend days or weeks dreading in the build up. The nurses are great and they know what they're doing, and it only takes about five minutes. It really wouldn't be worth getting worked up about beforehand. I'd feel fine about having another go.
The only slight drama was when they were inserting the cannula into my vein and the cap didn't quite close and my blood started pouring out. I'm not hugely squeamish, but I became lightheaded and started to feel like I would pass out - I think it was a bit much by that point. They just lay me down and everything was fine.
So in all, nothing to worry about thus far. I'll go and see my GP in a few days and if he wants me to have another go, I will. But if he says enough's enough, then I'll accept that.
It's not a pleasant experience especially if you have a pronounced gag reflex and you haven't had the maximum dose of sedation. Fear of an unknown procedure always makes it worse and you can't exactly practise for having an endoscopy...
You sound reassured about your oesophagus and I hope your GP decides that enough is enough and you can get on with your ongoing reflux treatment in conjunction with your now thankfully lessened anxiety and stabilised sertraline dosage.
You do sound much better (I know I've said this before). I'm sure there will be dodgy days but hopefully the better days will outnumber them in the coming weeks.
It's amazing how anxiety can affect the body and produce such pronounced symptoms. You did by far the best thing by getting tested and now you can concentrate on getting better knowing that you have been reassured by doctors.
SE, did I tell you about my experience with GERD?
ServerError
10-02-18, 22:18
You may have done. Forgive me for not remembering. Feel free to share again.
So before my PTSD, I never hardly even had heartburn. Maybe about once a year. During that period of intense PTSD after finding my friend's body, I was having panic attacks multiple times a day. My anxiety caused my stomach acid production to go through the roof, and I developed GERD.
I actually went into the ER because I had this feeling of something being stuck in my chest and in my throat, and of course this burning sensation in my chest. I thought I was having a heart attack, but they informed me of GERD.
To make a long story short, I went on PPIs, I changed my diet, and I got myself into intensive grief counseling/therapy. I also went on Lexapro. After I got my anxiety under control, I no longer had GERD. Now they can't even find any traces that I ever had it. It's a completely reversible condition for some of us if we make the right changes.
ServerError
12-02-18, 12:09
After doing so well lately, I've had a major setback this morning...
Following on from my MRI scan last week, I received a letter in the post for an appointment with a neurologist this Friday and it says MS clinic...
Now I'm absolutely terrified.
Can you speak to the neurology department at the hospital and ask them more about the appointment? I know you are jumping to conclusions naturally but this could just be a follow up to the scan as requested by the neurologist who heads the MS clinic? You were specifically being scanned for MS lesions, I thought?
You do need to speak to the hospital rather than speculate and ruminate. Horrible shock for you, Server. I sincerely hope this is a routine follow-up letter but you need more specific information obviously.
This was my thoughts,
The neurologist may just want to discuss the findings and he HAPPENS to work or lead the MS department.
This is likely it.
I apologise for not following this thread more diligently that must have come as a huge shock to you SE, but as pulisa rightly says you are speculating about the worse I would speak to neurology dept today if only to settle your troubled mind! Do you have the results of the MRI scan done last week or don't you know? Do try and not worry and I know it's easy said than done ATVB to you SE :) .
ServerError
12-02-18, 13:44
Okay, so I rang the department and it's reassuring news.
The appointment that's just come through is NOT related to my MRI scan (at least not directly).
The neurologist I originally saw who arranged my scan already has me down for a follow up in a few weeks. What's happened is that my GP surgery - probably because I saw several different doctors before Christmas when my GP was off - has made two referrals.
If I wanted, I could ring my surgery and find out why this second appointment has been made without somebody telling me they were doing it, but I'm just going to relax instead and go to the appointment and see what is said.
Excellent news SE so that can now be put to bed Brill eh?!! ATB
MyNameIsTerry
12-02-18, 15:46
As pulisa pointed out you do seem to be getting better. Your posting has calmed down which I hope is a sign of reduced anxiety rather than fear of posting or low mood.
But getting better, as you know, is a longer journey so being spiked by that letter and negative thinking taking over is something to forgive yourself for. As you progress you will change your thinking again so as to be better at handling potential triggers.
How are you feeling on the Sert?
Okay, so I rang the department and it's reassuring news.
The appointment that's just come through is NOT related to my MRI scan (at least not directly).
The neurologist I originally saw who arranged my scan already has me down for a follow up in a few weeks. What's happened is that my GP surgery - probably because I saw several different doctors before Christmas when my GP was off - has made two referrals.
If I wanted, I could ring my surgery and find out why this second appointment has been made without somebody telling me they were doing it, but I'm just going to relax instead and go to the appointment and see what is said.
Not often you get 2 referrals out of the NHS for one issue! Cock up from your surgery-good job you rang the department to clarify. I can imagine the shock that letter gave you-I would have reacted the same way.
ServerError
15-02-18, 08:55
BikerMatt - I haven't logged into this thread since I last posted in it, so if your question was for me, I apologise for not catching it. No ignorance intended.
Terry - The sertraline is doing me the power of good. It put the flames out and I'm much calmer than I was. What I have to work on now is lifting myself out of the fog and getting myself functioning again.
ServerError
16-02-18, 11:25
Little update for you all:
I went to the MS clinic appointment this morning that caused so much drama earlier this week.
I said to the neurologist "I'll be honest, I'm not 100% sure why I'm here" and he then put the fear of god into me by saying "I'm going to be completely honest with you..."
Obviously I assumed he was about to tell me that something showed on my MRI scan. But no, he followed it up with "... I don't know why you're here either. It looks like a clerical error."
He could understand why it freaked me out so much. We're always told as anxiety sufferers not to catastrophise or assume the worse automatically, but when you've had an MRI scan and then a week later get a letter specifically sending you to an MS clinic, it's going to be very difficult not to assume something must be wrong.
But it was an error. He'd seen my MRI results and said it was clear. He even said he doesn't see any need to for me to attend the follow-up at the end of the month, as there's nothing further to be done. So I can cancel it if I want to.
So there we are. MS scare over. Obviously the digestive stuff is ongoing and I think another gastroscopy may be needed to complete the job we didn't finish last time, but it just shows the power of anxiety, because a couple of months ago I really did think I had MS.
Little update for you all:
I went to the MS clinic appointment this morning that caused so much drama earlier this week.
I said to the neurologist "I'll be honest, I'm not 100% sure why I'm here" and he then put the fear of god into me by saying "I'm going to be completely honest with you..."
Obviously I assumed he was about to tell me that something showed on my MRI scan. But no, he followed it up with "... I don't know why you're here either. It looks like a clerical error."
He could understand why it freaked me out so much. We're always told as anxiety sufferers not to catastrophise or assume the worse automatically, but when you've had an MRI scan and then a week later get a letter specifically sending you to an MS clinic, it's going to be very difficult not to assume something must be wrong.
But it was an error. He'd seen my MRI results and said it was clear. He even said he doesn't see any need to for me to attend the follow-up at the end of the month, as there's nothing further to be done. So I can cancel it if I want to.
So there we are. MS scare over. Obviously the digestive stuff is ongoing and I think another gastroscopy may be needed to complete the job we didn't finish last time, but it just shows the power of anxiety, because a couple of months ago I really did think I had MS.
So pleased for you! You've been coping with it all so well. It's true that anxiety is very powerful and its hard to fight against but you've shown that it can be done. I wish I could do the same.
Hi SE yes it can be nerve wrecking mate, but this is great news try and deal with one problem at a time as this too can cause great stress when you have a million things going on in your head and trust your dr if another gastroscopy isn't needed accept that so the worst is over now you don't have MS :D:yesyes: ATB
That clerical error severely tested you as it would anyone, regardless of whether they had an anxiety disorder. Surely if you had have had a suspicious MRI indicative of MS a standard letter would never have be sent sending you to the MS clinic? Hopefully a telephone call is made to book the patient in with the neurologist and then the bad news is broken gently? I hope so.
Anyway, all that is irrelevant. It's very good news today, SE! Amazing what symptoms the brain can generate but great that you can acknowledge this. I hope you don't get sent for another endoscopy-you've had enough tests and are being treated for GORD anyway.
Good for you pal.that would of sent my anixety into another planet
ServerError
28-02-18, 22:21
I went back to the doctor on Monday to discuss my incomplete gastroscopy. It turns out the camera actually made it further than I realised. It got to the top of my stomach, which means they've seen the entirety of my esophagus and the crucial bit where it meets my stomach. The doctor even showed me the diagram they sent.
He gave me a bit more information about my results. Basically, all the saw was what they referred to as "reflux esophagitis". And the doctor said it was "really low level and nothing to worry about." So I just have to keep taking my PPI and look at dietary changes to get this reflux under control. He said if there was something wrong in my stomach, there'd have been some indication by now. There may be some gastritis, but nothing nasty.
He wants me to do another H. Pylori test. He said the hospital would have done one had they got far enough into my stomach, so he said we may as well just do one anyway. I did this last year, but I suppose there's a chance I could have caught it since.
But crucially, I'm not being sent for another go at the gastroscopy. He says there's no need.
What's remarkable about this whole recent episode is that I've had such nasty symptoms caused by something so mild. And it is mild. We've verified that with tests. If my anxiety over it hadn't have been so intense, I wouldn't have suffered so much. But I'm back on the sertraline and having therapy, so things are looking up again.
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