Lymphoma scare

[Rach9766]

I've been suffering from health anxiety for the past year. In the last 12 months I've been completely fixated on checking my body for signs of illness, convincing myself I've had anything from HIV to cancer. Specifically I've "diagnosed" myself with HIV, Syphilis, Hepatitis (B and C), Leukemia (CML/CLL) and ITP, all of which, after numerous tests, I do not have.
My current fixation is Lymphoma, specifically the indolent, and often incurable types such as Follicular Lymphoma. I check my lymph nodes daily, and by daily I mean probably about 10 times a day and the checks are thorough, full body checks, freaking out when I find a new lymph node. I've been to the doctors, probably once a week for the past 6 weeks, had several blood tests done such as CBC, all of which have come back normal. However, I understand that Lymphoma isn't always detected in a blood test and so I have no piece of mind. My doctor has scheduled me in for a "routine" ultrasound scan of my neck to look at the lymph nodes and determine whether the nodes are reactive or "something more sinister". The wait is killing me. I am convinced I have Lymphoma and I simply cannot enjoy any part of my life; convinced that I have a terminal cancer and that I need to detach myself from all pleasures in life so that when I get my diagnosis, I can be prepared to die. It's the worst feeling in the world.
Does anyone have any similar experiences or coping mechanisms they could share to help me through this tough time?

[sdoxo]

I went through a Lymphoma scare last year, I know how tough it can be. But poking and prodding your nodes is probably the reason they are still there. Try to go a few weeks without touching them and see if that helps :)

[Rach9766]

What was the outcome of your scare, if you don't mind me asking? I try every day not to touch them but it feels impossible. Thanks for your advice.

[sdoxo]

I went to my GP and told her my fears. I didn't have any swollen nodes so other than a blood test there wasn't much she could test for. Blood test was fine and I eventually just gave it up. I knew that if I did have it for that long I would have been really sick and there would have been no mistaking it.