LuSmith
29-11-17, 19:47
I don't know where to post this, since technically previously (a few months back) I've already had an ultrasound that has diagnosed me with a gallbladder polyp, but today's follow-up ultrasound examination has left me with even more anxiety than before I went in!
Now I know it's probably the worst thing I could have done but since being told in August this year the polyp had grown (the first ever diagnosis of it I had was in 2015), I basically ended up looking up stuff about it online, which was probably the worst thing I could have done, (because SOME polyps in the gallbladder that grow can end up being cancerous). Of course I know that it's unlikely under 10mm, and as of the last US I had it was 4.6mm, but I also read that some polyps can still be malignant below 10mm so there's this little part of my brain that's worrying about it.
I saw my surgery consultant last week, who said the ultrasound I was having today today would basically establish whether I am to have the surgery to remove it (of which he highly recommended since it was a) solitary and b) had grown since last time.)
Well, the ultrasound today didn't go as I thought it would. I thought at the very least I was hoping it would have stayed the same size so I could discuss it with the consultant next time I see him. But the sonographer basically couldn't find the polyp in the gallbladder and though I hadn't eaten or drank anything for over 6 hours like advised, she said it wasn't distended enough to see everything. Now I know she's just a sonographer but she was very confused as to why I wasn't jumping with excitement about the idea of it not being there - as to which I said that I was told by my consultant that they don't go away on their own. She basically said that I could get a second opinion in another 7 months (don't know where she got that timescale from - they're usually done every 3-6 months anyway) if I felt like she hadn't done a good enough job (of which I hadn't said anything about) and that maybe it was because of the shape that it was hidden idk.
I felt really stressed and anxious after this because now I have no idea if it's grown or how it's grown, and now I'm worried that waiting even longer will mean that it's more likely to have grown into something bad. I don't want to suddenly be told in 6 months time the worst case scenario, and all because they failed to find it on the ultrasound today.
Now it's weird, because my consultant said they don't grow too fast, and yet the sites I have looked at (and other patients with similar issues) have said that they can grow really quickly sometimes, so now I'm in two minds and am panicking about whether or not I've got cancer and in 6 months or something it'll be too late... I don't even know when I'm gonna see the consultant again, and now what he'll do with the information since we were relying on this ultrasound result to figure out whether my gallbladder surgery would go ahead sooner rather than later.
I know nobody here can diagnose or completely reassure me considering nobody here is in a medical position, but I'm wondering whether anyone here has also dealt with gallbladder poylp(s) and whether or not they grew or if they'd ever disappeared, or maybe just knowing of the time scale between the ultrasound and the surgery so I can tell myself to stop worrying and that the polyp isn't likely to grow so fast.
Just for reference, this polyp grew from 3mm in 2015 to 4.6mm in August 2017 - so I guess 1.6mm in 2 years? I know that doesn't seem like a lot maybe but every month that goes by I'm wondering if the growing is accelerating or if it is bad that leaving it is just gonna end up with me being told the worst in a few months down the line. :weep:
Anyway, I guess I just needed somewhere to vent and see if anyone had any similar experience, mainly because I'm really struggling with my health anxiety on top of this, I wouldn't worry if there was actually nothing there previously, but because I know what the consultant told me, it's sending my brain into freakout mode!
Now I know it's probably the worst thing I could have done but since being told in August this year the polyp had grown (the first ever diagnosis of it I had was in 2015), I basically ended up looking up stuff about it online, which was probably the worst thing I could have done, (because SOME polyps in the gallbladder that grow can end up being cancerous). Of course I know that it's unlikely under 10mm, and as of the last US I had it was 4.6mm, but I also read that some polyps can still be malignant below 10mm so there's this little part of my brain that's worrying about it.
I saw my surgery consultant last week, who said the ultrasound I was having today today would basically establish whether I am to have the surgery to remove it (of which he highly recommended since it was a) solitary and b) had grown since last time.)
Well, the ultrasound today didn't go as I thought it would. I thought at the very least I was hoping it would have stayed the same size so I could discuss it with the consultant next time I see him. But the sonographer basically couldn't find the polyp in the gallbladder and though I hadn't eaten or drank anything for over 6 hours like advised, she said it wasn't distended enough to see everything. Now I know she's just a sonographer but she was very confused as to why I wasn't jumping with excitement about the idea of it not being there - as to which I said that I was told by my consultant that they don't go away on their own. She basically said that I could get a second opinion in another 7 months (don't know where she got that timescale from - they're usually done every 3-6 months anyway) if I felt like she hadn't done a good enough job (of which I hadn't said anything about) and that maybe it was because of the shape that it was hidden idk.
I felt really stressed and anxious after this because now I have no idea if it's grown or how it's grown, and now I'm worried that waiting even longer will mean that it's more likely to have grown into something bad. I don't want to suddenly be told in 6 months time the worst case scenario, and all because they failed to find it on the ultrasound today.
Now it's weird, because my consultant said they don't grow too fast, and yet the sites I have looked at (and other patients with similar issues) have said that they can grow really quickly sometimes, so now I'm in two minds and am panicking about whether or not I've got cancer and in 6 months or something it'll be too late... I don't even know when I'm gonna see the consultant again, and now what he'll do with the information since we were relying on this ultrasound result to figure out whether my gallbladder surgery would go ahead sooner rather than later.
I know nobody here can diagnose or completely reassure me considering nobody here is in a medical position, but I'm wondering whether anyone here has also dealt with gallbladder poylp(s) and whether or not they grew or if they'd ever disappeared, or maybe just knowing of the time scale between the ultrasound and the surgery so I can tell myself to stop worrying and that the polyp isn't likely to grow so fast.
Just for reference, this polyp grew from 3mm in 2015 to 4.6mm in August 2017 - so I guess 1.6mm in 2 years? I know that doesn't seem like a lot maybe but every month that goes by I'm wondering if the growing is accelerating or if it is bad that leaving it is just gonna end up with me being told the worst in a few months down the line. :weep:
Anyway, I guess I just needed somewhere to vent and see if anyone had any similar experience, mainly because I'm really struggling with my health anxiety on top of this, I wouldn't worry if there was actually nothing there previously, but because I know what the consultant told me, it's sending my brain into freakout mode!